I don’t understand this feeling. I don’t know if I can survive this hollowness weighing me down, making it harder for me to breathe.
Everyone is caught up in the webs they’ve spun to keep themselves warm and I’m stranded here. Cold and alone. Unable to empty myself into words. Into actions. Into anything at all.
I can barely count the amount of times you’ve told me to just let it all out. To let myself be vulnerable and spill over. To bleed myself dry if there’s this poison running in my veins. And every time I try to do that, you disappear with new reasons.
You keep telling me I mean so much to you. You insist that it’ll all be okay. You insist I’ll be so much better than I am right now but I don’t know if I believe you anymore.
Everything just seems to be worsening by the day. You’re drifting further away from me. Finding new friends, avoiding my calls, ignoring my text messages. Maybe I don’t mean as much as I used to anymore.
I take what is left of my hands and wrap them around my head tightly, constantly trying to tell my brain to stop telling me to crush my skull.
I don’t need anything from you.
Except, maybe, for you to understand how crazy the voice in my head sounds.
Except, maybe, for you to be that someone I can share my poison with, without the fear of killing us both.
Tamarind Fall
Writing prompt: A girl who feels neglected and alone and she really wants to talk it out with the person who is making her feel that way but each time she tries, the person just convinces her by saying she means a lot to them.
(platonic)
titsay
romaincrisis
vaporwave
stormborns
