June 15 2022
lol I accidentally logged back into Tumblr and this is a total blast from the past. anyone remember me? I sometimes check on ao3 and read all the fresh comments just to get a boost of dopamine. it’s such a nice positive space, everyone is so nice to me and makes me feel very confident in my skills.
my last post was quite negative and from 2020. Two years later and I am verifiably killing it. I work a very glamorous job and absolutely love it, I’m finally making a consistent + good income, and my mind/body connection has literally never been healthier. like yeah, the usual disordered thoughts are still present but it’s pretty dull now. It’s lovely!! I’ve gotten into pilates and snowboarding and I love seeing myself get stronger and fueling myself in a healthier way. I’ve literally never looked better, either. crazy. being fit, eating well, sleeping enough - all much more attractive than binge/restrict cycles. Who would’ve thought? lol.
I have a different boyfriend now who is much much better. he drives me around our sunny city in his convertible and life feels very peaceful and easy. It’s hard to picture the version of me that was typing away at my little fanfiction story all those years ago, in the background of college stress and in the throes of a bad ED. That was... 4 years ago? wew. so much has changed.
anyway, not sure why I’m typing this up or WHO will even see this, but just in case anyone is lurking on my page after all this time - I am doing well! I’m so fine. life is incredible. and I still appreciate all the lovely comments you guys leave, sometimes so in-depth it’s crazy. I cherish every word. And I am on the cusp of writing my own book, been collecting thoughts and ideas for the past year or so... slowly trying to form it into some sort of plot. Your comments definitely give me inspiration and reassurance that I can do it.
So... yeah! that’s me! Feeling very good, very healthy. mentally, spiritually, emotionally.
