Tori Spring 🎧🖤

Tori Spring is my fav 🖤

[chronic0pessimist]

i am probably the only person ever to cry over using the last of the butter not realizing it and making my mom unable to make eggs. I hate being so fucking empathetic

[chronic0pessimist]

Just a reminder, only Midwesterners (in the US) can hear the difference between horror and whore in their accent. Just saying.

[chronic0pessimist]

I'm not sure how normal this is, but I'm neurodivergent. AuDHD. And for some reason I sometimes get ticks. Not often but sometimes. But when I get stressed or panicked, I get more ticks and more violent ticks. My ticks are just head jerks and stuff but still.

(I mean, the ticks getting more from stress being normal or not. Not being neurodivergent)

[chronic0pessimist]

I'm aroace.

Let me explain my experience of being aroace and how it effects me.

In my head, dating sounds awesome. Like the idea of using the 'normal' way to show your feelings that has already been 'perfected' by the world. And kissing sounds great like yes I want that pleasure. People can be really really attractive too. Especially women in my case.

But let's look at the reality of it and out of fantasies. Dating is a social construct that really means nothing. Plus the words just have no meaning to me. And kissing is just trading saliva and calling it 'fun'.

And, let's add the fact that I am repulsed by the action of doing it. It doesn't give me pleasure to date or kiss. Instead, it either makes me really bored and disinterested, or just completely repulsed to where I almost throw up. I've never kissed anyone to confirm, but I have dated and confirmed it.

When I think of dating, I think of unnecessary words that either make nothing change or mean absolutely nothing. When I think of kissing, I about want to gag at the idea of that being 'pleasurable'. Because tell me how you dont want to throw up or cry from that.

Ok, that's all I have to say. Thank you for reading my rant about why I identify as aroace.

[chronic0pessimist]

It is a everlasting fear of mine that I am hurting my friends and family when I am trying to keep them happy because they see it as too much. I dont want to hurt them, i want them to be happy and hurting people is a really big fear of mine.

[ororium-z]

Happy Pride!

[rootbeergoddess]

Every pride, you must reblog this. No exceptions

[thesaltofcarthage]

I love that four different people on my feed scheduled this joyous person to reblog by 8am on June 1. I look forward to seeing this a dozen more times today.

[chronic0pessimist]

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH GUYSSS!!!!

I came out to my family yesterday 😼😼

[chronic0pessimist]

I came out 34 minutes ago to my family via facebook and the first person to comment on my post was MY GRANDPA and he said "I am so proud of you!" 🥹🥹🥹🥹

I WAS NEEVOUS AS HELL AND NOW IM JITTERING WITH EXCITEMENT BRO OMFG!!!!!!!!!!!

[chronic0pessimist]

I hate having a midwestern accent. Because please tell me why 'horror' sounds like whore 😭✌️💔

[chronic0pessimist]

my mom asked me (her 13 year old child who isnt even 14 yet) if she could borrow 350 dollars from my dead dad's money so she could use it for the electrictian so she can sell our old house. Which seems wrong already in itself. But, then I tell you that the day before, she told me that there was like a 600 or 650 thing she can use to pay for stuff and the electrician cost mist of that money (33% or higher to 50% or higher). Which is only like 200 to 325 dollars. And my grandma loaned her 300. So where the hell is my money going??? And we BOTH should know that she has a spending problem. But she said she'll try to get it back to me as soon as possible

Anyways, I managed to wait until I didn't give a fuck so my morals would not care that much. Yes I know this is very wrong of her. But I really couldn't say no. But I also couldn't say yes. So I just waited until I couldn't care.

[chronic0pessimist]

do not ask why my top listened to song is I Kissed A Girl by Katy Perry. because I have not in fact kissed a girl, and i never will because im aroace (i may be lesbian but still aroace). and i in fact have no idea why it is my top listened to song

[chronic0pessimist]

I have undiagnosed AuDHD (i say this because my mom REFUSES to get me professionally diagnosed because "she already knows im autistic and have adhd so what's the point of diagnosing it" and "it's too expensive") but im still going to say this, I literally will stand around and do nothing until someone tells me to do something. I might be bored out of my mind but I'm standing in that same spot until you tell me otherwise. If it is my job to stand still, I will complete it even if I'm tired or need to use the restroom.

The only issue is I want to be organized and I want to have a schedule or list, but every time I do, it just goes south instantly and never works. So never ask me what my schedule is. (there is a schedule somewhere, but to me it doesn't look like one)

[chronic0pessimist]

Ok so, my first ever listened to song on spotify was Payphone by Maroon 5...... Makes sense since I was TEN YEARS OLD 😭😭

[chronic0pessimist]

I strongly believe me and my bestie were supposed to be soulmates (and we are) but we both ended up being aroace so we just became platonic soulmates :DD

[chronic0pessimist]

difference between my friends being happy about my achievements is astonishing.

that's the one that doesn't really care or doesn't think it's important. she's a good friend but were both bad a social cues so it isnt too bad

then there's my bestie :DDDDDD she's the besttttt and i would do anything for them :DDDDDDDDDD

[pessimist-and-insomniac]

WE GOT SPROLDEN!!!

[chronic0pessimist]

Let me just go through me deep analysis of this since I don't want to flood the comments. I'm guessing someone like set off fireworks because everyone else is like laughing their heads off while tori is like "omfg" and completely stunned (yk the firework scene from solitaire where tori and michael were. yeah that.) and michael looks like "this is my shitting/mask literally every single emotion face so i can keep tori safe." we cant even see elle's face atp. Ans michael has his hand forward or maybe even touching imogen like under her armpit.. (which also might be a cause for tori's shocked expression) but i think he's just trying to get imogen to stop so tori feels safer. Darcy looks like she's about to spit their drink everywhere from laughing so hard. And there's imogen and a girl next to her. which i doubt is tao's mom since imogen and that girl's hands are touching. but there is a mysterious looking hand at the very top part of that girl's black lacy top thingy (but like on the strap and it's very very subtle) Or maybe someone did something funny but terrifying so that's why people's expressions are like that. idk. then we look at the teachers (i cant spell their names well). they both are covering their right hand, meaning they could have gotten engaged. and they're smirking at each other too.

[chronic0pessimist]

optimist: "this cup is half full"

pessimist: "this cup is half empty"

my dumbass: "this cup is halfway filled. well, not even that. you would have to check the volume of the cup and see if the volume of the water in the cup is the the same as the air left in the cup. which it's probably not halfway full since the chances of it being that exact are very very very slim. it just appears to be halfway filled. so this cup is halfway filled to what our brains and society define as halfway"