Just Figuring It Out

Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, Chronic Pain Syndrome, Chronic Aura Migraines, IBS, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Panic Disorder and Bipolar l Disorder

[chronicillnesslife]

My joints be like:

[chronicillnesslife]

I didn’t realize that staying up until 4 o’clock in the morning sketching and writing songs and not feeling more tired than usual the next day wasn’t normal. I didn’t realize that randomly having the urge to spend all my money and not care about the consequences wasn’t normal. I didn’t know that wanting to go to parties and do new types of drugs and have risky sex wasn’t normal…I thought it was being a teenager. I didn’t realize that feeling like I was on top of the world, feeling like I could do anything I wanted to…wasn’t normal.

I knew that wanting to kill myself wasn’t normal. I knew that feeling so numb I was unable to get out of bed wasn’t normal. I knew that constantly breaking down into tears wasn’t normal. I knew that being so irritable I would snap at anybody who tried to speak to me wasn’t normal.

I knew that I wasn’t suppose to always be sad, but I didn’t realize you could be too “happy”.

Why aren’t we educated on the signs of mania?

[chronicillnesslife]

I hate being asked by abled people how I can live and deal with my pain and conditions, like I’m some sort of inspiration. I don’t have a fucking choice, this is my life. That’s how I live with it, because I don’t have the option to live any other way.

[chronically-mars]

I hate being unreliable as a chronically ill and disabled person.

I hate that I never know when my disability will get so bad it prevents me from working and that’s terrifying for me to think about. Especially when so many people count on me.

Sometimes it scares me that I’m so young but it’s so hard to work with my health conditions sometimes, as is I never rest because resting while being chronically ill isn’t resting, it’s pain/symptom prevention.

PLEASE support your chronically ill and disabled loved ones. They’re trying their hardest to be reliable and to finish everything that needs to get done but there will be days where we simply can’t.

[chronicallydragons]

anyone else ever wish they could lie down harder? Like, I'm already horizontal, but I need more horizontal. I need to be absorbed by the floor. I think that would fix me

[teacupbug]

My controversial opinion is that I think chronically ill people should be able to fight one doctor a year

[jomarchdaughter]

i FEAR this is exactly who i am

[weltenwellen]

Stephanie Foo, What My Bones Know: A Memoir of Healing from Complex Trauma

[lilydrafts]

Love yourself a little extra right now. You're creating the life of your dreams and you absolutely deserve it. It's about to get magical for you.

[lupusbaby]

Being chronically ill is like

“It’s fine”

“It’s fine”

“It’s fine”

*complete mental breakdown because you can’t do this anymore*

“It’s fine”

[mournfulroses]

Nikolay Punin, from a diary entry featured in The Diaries of Nikolay Punin: 1904 - 1953

[chronicillnesslife]

I am the sun,

but I am the moon.

I am what it is calm,

in the loudest of rooms.

I am the silence,

but I am screaming out.

I am both,

I am each side

I am bipolar

I say it with pride

[lessonstobelearned]

There needs to be more allowance for disabled people to be angry. People want us to be somber and quiet. Sad at our condition and how hard life is. And yeah that’s allowed. But we’re also allowed to be fucking pissed off. People don’t help, people infantilise, governments don’t supply enough support, places aren’t accessible. This isn’t momentary. This is forever. There are so many things we can’t do and so many things we can’t be. Life isn’t fair. It likely won’t get fair enough for most to be comfortable. Yeah, I’m grieving, I’m sad, but I’m also FUCKING ANGRY.

[janeacular]

can they invent a mobility aid that helps with the joint pain & also does NOT cause different joint pain in a different area from use

[chronicallydragons]

anyone else ever wish they could lie down harder? Like, I'm already horizontal, but I need more horizontal. I need to be absorbed by the floor. I think that would fix me

[chroniclesofchronicillness]

This makes so much sense

[thepeacefulgarden]