weekly cay

my weekly (but sometimes daily) thoughts abt life, media, or just me fangirling <3 lets be friends :)

[cloudcay]

i wanted to use the middle part of this for debit card but forgot that its technically hobi's :(

hobi bby pls let me use this for my card so that i will think of u everytime i pay for something

[cloudcay]

this girl ruined kpop for me in hs

ive been reflecting a lot of my past and who i am today and i would jus like to say that i think that a large reason as to why i got into kpop so late into the game is because of a girl from high school.

during orientation, i remember meeting this girl bc my friend and i were talking abt kpop i believe. but more so my friend had mentioned them and i asked a question abt it. this girl standing next us in line starts talking abt bts with us and thats where it begins. at the time, i remember her saying her nickname (she told us her 'korean' name and 'korean' nickname even tho she was hispanic, sorry i dont remember what specific hispanic) and having red flags begin to pop up.

since we were in the same program in school, we typically had at least one class together each year except for junior year. thank goodness bc our program class was a double class and we had been in so many classes at that point. anyways i digress. she would always bring up bts and twice!!

at the time of writing this i realized that she hella scarred twice for me but mommy jihyo rlly sold it for me after discovering them in 2020. whenever we were in class, she would always just randomly call my name and start doing twice dances like TT or cheer up, which unfortunately prompted me to absolutely hate on her and unfortunately see twice in a bad light. she was also obsessed with jk and would always 'pair' herself with him which at the time was extremely cringey to witness. overall, i wasnt a big fan of her and was stuck with her for four whole years and am so glad that i never see her at college.

prior to getting back into kpop, i originally got into it during my last year of middle school, but ultimately decided to drop it before i entered high school bc i figured i needed a clean slate when i started attending. (pls dont judge, i had just secured a group of friends who were going to hs with me and never had a real friend group before that. i was doing my best to fit in with them to keep in my life forever, but well only 3 of them remained with me and im so so so grateful for them).

anyways bringing us to today, where im pretty sure a lot of the reason that i got into kpop so late was bc a girl in hs who i thought was really cringey and generally not my vibe ruined it for me.

[cloudcay]

cypher

what i would do to see any of the cypher parts live

[cloudcay]

just one day

the best bts song

with proof out now and everybody is listening to their older music i would like to bring attention to just one day

i will NEVER accept just one day slander

that song is GOOD like it is the epitome of sunshine and rainbows and the reason why our earth rotates

it will ALWAYS be a good song and i will not let anyone tell me otherwise

i will fight for this song WHOLEHEARTEDLY

[cloudcay]

a day late but pls day 2 of hitc 2021 was so fucking good??!?! i am FOR SURE going again next year this shit was soooo fucking lit!! but also like i wanna set goals for myself because i couldnt help but long for so many things when i went...

- making new friends

- going with friends (although i luv my sis for coming w me, she a real one fr)

- trying the food

- letting loose

- getting lost in the energy of the crowd

- and if possible, being at the front/near the front of an artist who's performing

hitc was such an incredible performance and every single artist that performed yesterday was ABSOLUTELY AMAZING!! much love to everyone that was there and made the show happen!

and if u come across this post and was at hitc or wanna talk abt it, pls feel free to message me!! <33

p.s. enjoy this lil vid of joji singing gimme love that brought me a lot of joy hehe :D

[cloudcay]

my simp levels are off the charts right now

[cloudcay]

man i rlly wanna go to an actual rave now! its so mf fun and the energy that the crowd exudes and the interaction with the dj is just downright AMAZING!!! i saw illenium last night and it was so freaking fun and his set was actually amazing <333 although i wish i could have let loose more, i still thoroughly enjoyed myself and legitimately thought i broke my kneecaps!!!!! there was a group of people just jamming in front of me and it made so happy to see people hanging out with each other and just showing so much love and joy with one another !! but it also made me wish i had friends who would join me in festivals and just let loose once in a while :( anyways today is day2 of hitc and im v v excited for todays list of performers!!

[cloudcay]

honestly, i was BIG intimidated when i first stepped foot onto the hitc festival grounds. it felt like i was in a world that i was familiar with but had no idea what to do (im filipino and hitc has been known to be an 'asian' festival). anyways, other than that festival goers are so pretty with their outfits that i was nervous to show off my very mild and casual outfit. hopefully today i'll be able to take pictures on myself being happy and just let loose with no other thought in my head :)