Murkoff's Bloodhound.

Former Collections Department Agent and Director of Historical Refinement at Murkoff Corp.

[clydeperryisms]

I'm who Murkoff calls when their curiosity outruns their prudence.

guidelines & context . . .

clyde perry outlast trials RP/ask side blog. just for fun. no one-on-one literate/no starters/no dms. admin is 21+, eng. minors dni. muse&mun use he/him prns.

muse is played as confident & cocky; snippy & cold when displeased. contextually written/played as someone who has temporary residence at the sinyala facility but is frequently on the move for his investigations. love/hate rel with dr. easterman, friendly banter with avellanos. has little to no respect for most reagents as he needs to maintain a business relationship with them. prime assets are particularly aggravating, especially franco. everything on this blog is in character unless specified as OOC. set in 1959 (current day in-universe) so muse will not understand most if any modern day references.

tags include . . . #ooc, #letters (askbox), #reblogs (self-explanatory)

ask box is always open. — ☏ .

[clydeperryisms]

Don't you fret, Mr. Perry, my lips are sealed—I won't go tattling about your eyesight! Your reputation precedes you though, and it's awful impressive that it doesn't hinder you none. Murkoff should count their lucky stars to have you in their arsenal, huh?

Say, um, you mentioned you're keen about chess? I can't quite seem to get the knack, think you'd be able to teach me a thing or two?

- ☀️

You're absolutely right. Sometimes I don't think I get the credit I deserve around here... but maybe that's just me.

Keen is an apt word for it. I played in local chess championships as a child. My pop always took the credit for my winnings, even though he didn't know a damn thing about it. Certainly not as much as myself, anyway.

I'd love to share some tips. Don't expect me to share everything, though. Like they say: a magician never reveals his secrets. ;)

[clydeperryisms]

Why does your blue eye look like it's glowing in the dark are you radioactive?

Nope. I've actually got super powers. I can see right through all of you.

If it's not obvious, to those with half a brain, I'm kidding. No, I'm not radioactive. You people have got to come up with better insults.

[clydeperryisms]

Tell that buffoon Easterman he needs to quit using company funds to buy cigarettes. And you need to stop breaking our goddamn typewriters, Perry.

- R. Pyke, Murkoff Corporation Board of Directors.

How about you tell Easterman to stop working me to my god damn bones every week. Not my fault they're giving me equipment that's not made to withstand my level of expertise.

[clydeperryisms]

missed you... easterman needs his minoxidil

I'm not his pharmacist. Might want to contact Nurse Barlow about this.

[clydeperryisms]

can I dye your hair blue

MURKOFF CORP PERSONNEL SURVEILLANCE

COPY

PRIVATE JOURNAL ENTRY OF MR. CLYDE PERRY

Received mail from a re-agent today asking me if they could dye my hair blue. I'm tempted to just tell them yes just to feel something. I need to get Bradley's opinion before I move forward; I don't want to lose my entire career over something stupid. But, God, let me live a little.

[clydeperryisms]

The kids miss you, Clyde. I have to keep telling them you're on business trips... although in a way, you are. Come home briefly... kiss them goodnight, and then we could make them a brother.

The.. what the fuck?

I'm going to pretend to not have received this correspondence.

[clydeperryisms]

Mr. Perry, I know I’m a reagent and all that, but I think your eyes are very beautiful 🫶🏻

-🦝

Well, thanks. I won't ever shy away from a compliment.

[clydeperryisms]

If you were locked in a room, and you were told that the only way out was to fistfight a prime asset, which one would you choose?

Can I just shoot myself instead?

[clydeperryisms]

Not sure how or why it's getting brought to my attention, but I feel inclined to comment on it. Whichever re-agents are being such sore losers about not winning their chess matches that they're beating their peers to a pulp, quit it. You're raising my tax dollars and making a mockery of devout chess players like myself.

[dulxelexhe]

“you reek of alcohol, hendrick” or something idk

a gift for a friend :-)

[clydeperryisms]

Mr. Perry, I hope this isn't terribly rude of me, but how's about the eye? Does it cause you much bother? There's speculation that you can't see a jot with the blue one, but that's just hearsay.

If it helps any, it's devastatingly handsome...

- ☀️

I've lived with it for long enough that it's become entirely normal to me. My vision is limited in that eye, but I'm not entirely blind. Mostly tends to give me issues with any exterior spots in my field of vision. Can confirm that Bradley has scared me near shitless on more than one occasion stumbling into my office to my left.

Appreciate the compliment. Though I would prefer you keep this "hearsay" to a minimum. Last thing I need is my work being jeopardized due to re-agent mutters.

[clydeperryisms]

I want you .

Contact me via telex for serious business inquiries.

[clydeperryisms]

Hi pops! Greetings to you; If you were an ice cream flavor, which one would you become? Me personally, I reallg like Mcdonalds ice cream, it is the only thing I like from there, But the machine is always broken. I wish I could be vanilla mcodnalds ice cream. ૮( ꒦ິ⍣꒦ີ)ა

Took quite a liking to Lady Borden's Praline Pecan in recent weeks. I've been known to enjoy some Devil Mint, too.

[clydeperryisms]

I'm sorry sir but what is it with you and torture?? You seem so fairly normal and well adjusted until you break out the sharp pointy stuff??? Why do you enjoy this so much

Well-adjusted, huh? Thanks.

It's not about enjoying it, per se. It's about getting the job done. Nothing else gets you valuable information like instilling some good ol' fear into someone's mind.

I'm not Murkoff's premiere investigator for no reason. Clearly I must be doing something right.

[clydeperryisms]

be nice and open wide

Give me a break.

[clydeperryisms]

Just got back to my office at Sinyala after a week in the hospital. Holding off on investigating potential experimental population considerations until further notice. Not worth more blood loss.