This here is my mind spew its just for me its not for you

but I still shared a few maybe 'like' one or two;else fuck right off if you've naught better to do

[codemonk-e]

myriad

. today I have frustrated my way through ten thousand days on gaia . don’t ask how I managed it

.

I can scarcely imagine ten thousand more

.

[codemonk-e]

Yule-Log; G Yoho and yarhar from yonder afar and nothing ever came free I've packed my bags and I burned my flags tech-no hobo's life for me Information age and eternal wage slave my biomass is barely spare parts In this mass machine if you keep your nose clean you might just come out alive I've twisted and squirmed and been mostly spurned since at least the age of five Blessed by few and chosen by you I twisted with all of my might as I change hat here I went madder as my scarf flew into the night Limerick and lyric at ferrocerium turmeric I shiver one single mote An illusion am I I repeat this lie that I label my self I've burned my bones and we've trashed my homes and the song is one final note Record of dead and smash in the head leave my book up on the shelf This tragic tale of how to fail to make sense of your life Nail in coffin should you trust the boffin and dare go under the knife Burning the bridges and landslide the ridges exploding is the new big fad You can go your own way at the end of the day I left because you went mad Agoraphobe and dissect the lobe for sensations of Deja Vu I say no thanks for breaking the ranks of the scattered few Scalpel and scuttle a ship in trouble wrecking up on the shallow I've tossed the anchor with no knot to hang her it's dark without the tallow But cutting the fat is just where it's at by accordance with the arts And with no final look I'm closing this book for tinder to the fire Just look away and start a new day don't help me with my pyre And with no final look I'm closing this book for tinder to the fire

[codemonk-e]

doesn't matter, moving on Blinded in the hypocrisy of a twisted prison-sex-complex victim cum abuser in a mea culpa full circle of life cycle out of control freak manias and paranoias traded and seeded no concession stand your ground ready aim fire your mouth and unleash your mind is a terrible thing to taste of your own medicine and it is not so good now yet it won't stop. Broken down into bite size piece and spat out for indigestion in result nothing left to assign blame fault and insult just winter salt cold ashvalt and I once thought I knew you but if you have to eat it that way I don't know how I can even know you.

[codemonk-e]

I don’t need to be you and you don’t need to be me just being ourselves can set our minds free

you’ve got a will to die but have you a will to live spending all your time for a soul to give

much love to this world in which we share driving our cars and polluting the airs

hustle and bustle and turn about ignorant fools with gigantic clout

far too much to see and far too much to do but I’d rather not spend all my time on you

wake up after lunchtime I lost half my day spend it wasting time but not for any pay

yeah I guess I can spare you but one more line don’t care just be yourself and we’ll be fine

[codemonk-e]

each day I wake a little more

each day I find myself a little more exhausted

[codemonk-e]

eratta: erasure

thinking of things you do binding me to you syncronicity sinking this siddi

karmic conditioning juxtapose anything surely you must confess all language is a mess

we’re still stuck in a rut yet got no strings to cut instead carve symbols on the floor and don’t forget to shut the door

all unnatural now believe our society deceives and we’re not even done while gaia circles around our sun

yet we still don’t seem to know just which way that we should go it is just another day would it merely go my way

screaming into night asanine false plight truly drop the load cut the cord I do goad

and so I disconnect and so I disconnect the problem stays the same the systems are insane.

[codemonk-e]

I'm caught between wanting to punch everybody in the face and putting a bullet in my head to leave the human race but I'm trapped caught up in my present pace and I'm mesmerized by staring into space the stars in the darkness look prettier than thong lace and I forget I'm just a fucked up head-case born onto this planet where I feel I have no place just an endless run after nothings for which I chase Everything takes its toll but theres no tolls I can take sick and tired of how much I feel fake words scar my mind like leaves beneath my rake my body twists as my muscles begin to shake I feel so angry I might just throw myself into a lake maybe I'll be reincarnated into a drake and I'll die bitten by venomous snake no funeral for ducks so no there won’t be a cake I haven't yet found a good reason to be awake I haven't yet found a good reason to be awake I haven't yet found a good reason to be awake I haven't yet found a good reason to be awake

[codemonk-e]

cracked bottle

The odds that you’re the one who this is directed at are pretty low. The likelyhood that you-as-that-person even comprehend it never mind understand all the words is arguably lower.

take it however you want it but realize and know that this is my soapbox

Truthfully speaking, your attitude/outlook of bleak wallowing at misery puts me in a repugnant frame of mind, which I find itself more repugnant. Behaviorally speaking, you’ve placed me up on a pedestal and hung this weight of ill-defined expectation upon me. While I do offer an ear to hear and a voice to respond I’m looking to be neither constant preacher of values nor crutch to be hobbled about with. I’m dropping some of that weight with these words, and making clear that the pedestal exist only in your actions. Indeed the only options in such a position are to adopt it in falsehood or step down and continue my previous course. Metaphorically, I’m more of an index of loosely associated pointers than I am the library of information offered, and while a librarian will answer your questions and point you to the right book, she really just wants back into her own book or paperwork and will wear thin of patience for the same request repeatedly. You think you know “go with the flow” to be a fundament of my philosophy, but this doesn’t mean I’m rudderless and in need of a tow or to be steered by others - simply that I follow that which pleases me at the speed I wish to travel. What you fail to see in this glimpse into my philosophy is the span of flows available and how I steer through them. What you fail to see are unwritten navigational charts and unplanned routes of travel, since the span of flows to travel is ever shifting and changing. The only sparse record is what has been or is purported by fellow travelers amidst the chaos. Just as I owe you no more judgement than that which you ask for, you owe me no proof but for that which you claim to me as your reality. As you owe me no more explanation than that which you claim you wish I grok, I owe the same lack to you. There is a growing disparity of words twixt us two and this too is a weight which drags from me. Communication is two-ways, a key thing, but whatever-this-relation is, it appears to be more one-way in words than can carry it. I’m not a mind-reader; meanings are subjective; and body language tells many lies, so whatever is stewing away in that head of yours is going to need serious refinement into something communicable through words defined of the english language before we’re near a position such that we began in.

In belated conclusion, fuck you too.

[codemonk-e]

Why you don't really hear about my life is the reason I don't really have a lot to say see my anecdotes are unique to my experience and pretty worthless for you to reinterpret so no matter how interesting I might find it what the fuck should I waste energy expecting anybody other than me to care for is this a reminder to myself or an explanation to outsiders it's not what it isn't and it's definitely what it is it's three weeks without rest and mounting success after success with strangers impressed by that which they can't achieve and all I want to do is leave this place and never return it's an itch I can't scratch though I fight and I yearn while I earn and I earn, repute and rent are my focus and intent though it seems evident that it's time poorly spent 'cause at the end of the day hey what can I say I'm still tired I'm still sick I'm still used up frustrated I think this whole game is just been completely overrated I just hate it, what else can I say feeling burned up and dumped out at the end of the day as I huff and I lay, spew puff and word-play drop a match watch the flames start to rise the warmth makes me smile though happily I've set my bed on fire I won't sleep again live on in the flames as I lay down my head my body is consumed that's it the end

[codemonk-e]

with a sour mouthful of tooth rot and decay our morals collapsed while we sat and complained among many young cats that never got spayed whole world collapsing as we sit and we play worried mostly about the end of the next day barely thinking of where our kids will be staying

I really hope you get what I'm really saying I urge you to do more than nod your head praying all thing will fade away like a sentence decaying and with all that said this poem is fading reblog read along and leave a "like" rating hope my thoughts have left your mind craving

[lament-of-ajna]

Using this cheap trick, a bowl for your bong doubles as a dabs rig

[codemonk-e]

guys its a 3″ M3 bolt and five nuts just in case the picture didn’t explain enough we’ve been using this for about a week now - pretty solid option for under $2, compared to prices in a head shop

[codemonk-e]

Lost; In Memory of the Unmemorable

this insinuation of estimation-calculation-infatuation leads conflagration of inflation in this nation of patrons who rape and pillage the lands and wives of native sons who never played with guns and didn’t need your funds now we’re the bleeding ones red skin welted backs from nuns indoctrination of stolen children souls now forgotten fun left with deep emotional problems echo chamber reserves no silence just violence from authority figments whos intent would see a sea of land made up of cement hell bent on incarceration for missed false rent settlers who’ve displaced former caretakers o’ this space now the small per cent lost tongues thin air ruined lungs can’t barely gasp to vent best read some history dig deep if you wonder what all this meant.

[codemonk-e]

Many frantic things to do not stopping to share with you Wonder what’s next coming through sit back down and sigh a “phew”

[codemonk-e]

In the end, life consumes us all.

I’ve been consumed by life.

Smash my face through the wall

Take a break from the strife

[lament-of-ajna]

the face masks a universe within

[codemonk-e]

fly to colors

[codemonk-e]

strange sectors