adopt me? @codex-shredder - Tumblr Blog

call me riddle. she/her/it, TMA

late 20s, white USAmerican(PNW)

plural, nonbinary trans Woman.

chronically ill, mentally disabled, and socially inept

i'm a lesbian and poly

i like sex, card games, video games, writing and photography.

Outside tumblr:

discord: riddlesmith69

signal: riddlesmith.69

fedi: [email protected]

#pinned post #info #introduction #about me #intro #me

butchbellies

These pants fit fine, right?

iamahopelessromantic

Sometimes self-harm wears soft disguises — not razors or bruises, but silence and neglect. It's in the slow unravelling of care: the showers that go untaken, the clutter that grows like ivy, the meals skipped with a shrug. It's drinking three cups of coffee and calling it breakfast, not because you're busy — but because you don't believe you're worth feeding.

It's sleeping on top of the covers in yesterday’s clothes, scrolling until your eyes burn, chasing noise to drown out the ache. It's deleting messages before they’re sent, staying small in conversations, hiding your laughter like it’s something dangerous.

It's saying no to things you love before anyone else gets the chance to. Turning away from kindness because you don't know how to hold it. It's setting your dreams on fire before they have a chance to breathe - not because you don’t care, but because you’ve been taught that joy is something earned through suffering. And so you become your own gatekeeper, punishing yourself in invisible ways. But wounds don’t always bleed. Sometimes, they look like a life unlived, a light dimmed on purpose, a heart whispering, “I don’t deserve this” to every good thing it meets.

Self-harm can be the quiet art of self-erasure. It's ignoring your reflection because you can’t bear the sight of yourself, or drowning in oversized clothes to avoid being perceived. It's canceling plans that made your heart flutter just yesterday, because somewhere between then and now, you decided you weren’t lovable enough to show up. It’s walking into a room and shrinking, speaking in softened tones so you don’t take up space, apologizing for existing in places where you’re allowed to be. It’s procrastinating dreams until they rot, because the thought of succeeding feels more unbearable than failing.

Sometimes it looks like pouring love into everyone else but keeping none for yourself. Giving until you’re empty, then blaming yourself for feeling hollow. It's avoiding doctors when you're unwell, skipping therapy sessions, or pretending you're fine because vulnerability feels like a luxury. It’s surrounding yourself with people who don’t see you - or worse, people who hurt you — because deep down, you believe that’s all you’re worth. It’s not a cry for attention. It’s a deeply ingrained belief that pain is your baseline and anything gentler must be a mistake.

ruanauden

dancing with you 🎀

sailatina3

I just think it's odd how supposedly anti racist whites en mass want to normalize the n word. By that I mean normalizing past use of it to the point where any criticism of using that word is written off as a nothingburger. They want to normalize this idea that it's natural for whites to use the n word at one point or another. Regardless of how old they were and how much they knew better.

I'd like to know, is this "racist phase" truly so ubiquitous amongst whites that they feel the need to defend each other over it? So common that they want to normalize it as a "kids will be kids" pass time? I wouldn't know, personally I never felt the need to say or do such things when I was a child. Much less as an adult. How come white adults are not allowed to be questioned for the actions they commit as adults? Why is patience always delivered to the whites, while everyone else has to shut up?

ca-tsuka

"Mfinda", an upcoming African-American-Japanese feature film produced by N LITE.

Directors: Gisaburo Sugii & Arthell Isom. Character designs: Patience B. Lekien & Shigeru Fujita. Image boards: Shinichiro Yamada. Animation production : N LITE, MOCCO, PONOC. Partners: Masao Maruyama (Studio M2), GKIDS.