codswolop

She/It fish

[ulan-bator]

Visit Original Link

[monster2003]

I’m putting in my too weak notice.

[shamebats]

"it's just stress" oh thank god, it's just the silent killer that slowly kills you, perfectly harmless, no need to worry

[passion-of-l0vers]

yknow kinda something special about the fact that i got a cut on my left hand ring finger while working on someone’s christmas present. that’s gonna leave a scar. every time i look at my ringfinger i’ll be reminded of it. the “wedding band” finger… kinda more intimate than marriage…

[passion-of-l0vers]

but also OUUUUUCCCCCHHHHHHHIIIIEEEEE

[passion-of-l0vers]

[passion-of-l0vers]

cut myself on the same finger while trying to cut a bagel…. idk how to romanticize this one guys

[bucketofcrows]

you have to fuck the bagel now

[passion-of-l0vers]

i have to fuck the bagel.

[gnocchioli]

Imagine all the things I could do if I just did them.

[positivestress]

I wish I was a female tiger because then if I was talking to someone and I was getting off topic I could say “but I tigress,” and then kill and eat them because I am a tiger

[bgm05]

casual pokemon player meme: I would like to have sex with this animal

competitive pokemon player meme: Bro thought he could switch his 252 Spe Borgulon into 252 SpAtk Choice Codpiece 2x Funny Dance STAB Mega Booboobus Peerless Tsunami 💀

[motherfucker-unlimited]

[grenadineghost]

you want to be mommy’s adjective noun, don’t you, pet name? you want to verb and verb for mommy like a good gender

[alhyastarain]

you want to be mommy's weird potato, don't you, Brian? you want to skip and somersault like a good jester

[argumate]

I keep thinking this! very frustrating

[argumate]

fuck!

[krafterwrites]

I'm genuinely crying right now

[ashiffriend]

danganronpa if it was good

[unalivejournal]

Embarrassed myself a few days ago and since then I've been periodically going like this

Ignore the part where he gets naked that's not part of it.

[loveridden1999]

top 3 hobbies for young adults:

1. borrowing misery from future

2. carrying grief of the past

3. agonizing over the present

[epicsause-official]

since its june i wanted to admit that about 3 years ago i made what is probably my biggest contribution to the internet

[babushkaat]

[babushkaat]

[scramratz]

Can u do a backflip

i can't do shit

[scramratz]

what about a front flip

why can't you jut accept me for who i am

[djbodyhorror]

im gonna grill myself ! <- me if I was a rack of meats and vegetables

[littlegaybirdboy]

im gonna skrill myself ! <- me if I was notable dubstep artist Skrillex

[ittybittyvampires]

i’m gonna thrill myself ! <- me if I was a rollercoaster or perhaps a tilt a whirl

[bli-ndbaby]

i’m gonna krill myself! <- me if i was a hungry whale looking to chow down

[lipsticked-bookworm]

i’m gonna frill myself! <- me if i was a seamstress looking to make my dress more exciting

[codswolop]

im gonna drill myself ! <- me if i was kasane teto's fuckass haircut