A Short While After The Beginning

Hi, this is Cody, I'm not here right now but if you just leave your name and url at the beep I'll get back to you as soon as I can. Entirely in love with duprass42 & mallotovcocktail. I'm fairly inactive but I'm still alive, I promise.

[feministism]

[vegaofthelyre]

[tubofgoodthings]

Calvin’s snowmen are breathtaking achievements and I will accept no disputes

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

So today this kid yelled Nani the fuck?!? in the middle of a test and I felt compelled to share this to the world.

teachers, share the weird crap your kids have done!

[ralsalot]

I’m not a teacher (yet) but I do work with students and one of them had the nerve to look me dead in the eye and ask me “why would it be a bad idea for me to eat this entire marker?” They’re 11

[official-lyzzystardust]

An 4th grader asked for a high five by saying, “A little slappy to make daddy happy?”

I did not give him a high five.

[myathesleepyoctopus]

A student during break had her head in her arms and was shaking a bit, so i asked the kid next to her whether she was laughing or crying and this 8 year old stared me in the eye deadpan and said “im crying on the inside”

[myathesleepyoctopus]

Wait i take that back, I cant believe i forgot about the time i brought in a small stuffed octopus as a class mascot because why tf not. It was a class of high schoolers and i didnt imagine theyd actually care much, but one student snuck in a snack and gave it to the octopus as a tribute. Which led to other students doing the same thing, until every day there was a pile of of offerings to Fweej the Overseer, mostly consisting of things like string cheeses and small bags of chips, but sometimes there wouldd be a couple bucks in quarters, one kid brought in some giant pocky i think, and at one point there was a cold stone gift card. This stuffed octopus gained a cult following.

Later i brought in another stuffed octopus that looked exactly the same but bigger and told the class that Fweej the Overseer accepted their offerings and became stronger. These highschoolers lost their goddamn minds.

[shieldmaiden19]

Oh my god I love this. Thank you for letting those kids be the dorks all high schoolers are.

[arthurmorgans]

when you’re watching a movie and u recognize one of the actors in it from somewhere but u haven’t watched any of the movies or shows listed on their imdb

[toshio]

everyone at tumblr on december 16, 11:59 PM right before staff bans titties for eternity:

[alrightsnaps]

To all the women who have a soft spot for witches; you’re in for a big treat once the His Dark Materials series drops my darlings.

[alrightsnaps]

To all the women who have a soft spot for witches; you’re in for a big treat once the His Dark Materials series drops my darlings.

[memewhore]

[writing-prompt-s]

Image Prompt

[boopednose]

This is the installation wizard

[liquidstar]

any modern fma au where kain fuery doesn’t have a podcast is invalid

[liquidstar]

he’s just the fma equivalent to griffin mcelroy or something

[seelcudoom]

“hey im kainne fury and this is shou tucker and welcome to monster factory”

[liquidstar]

FUCK YOU

[6qubed]

THAT WAS UNCALLED FOR

[trilllizard666]

being in the fma fanbase is like playing Russian Roulette except the bullets are tucker jokes and memes about maes hughes dying

[sadhoc]

laws about minimum wage should apply to disabled people

laws about minimum wage should apply to incarcerated people 

everyone deserves a fair living wage for their labor

[sadhoc]

bringing this post back bc you know those recent wildfires in north california? 

the ones that burnt more than 150,000 acres, killed 85 people, and destroyed almost 14,000 homes, including the entire city of paradise, CA?

40 percent of the firefighters in the state’s forest service are inmates serving time for nonviolent crimes.  

do you wanna know how much they make?

1 dollar and 20 cents an hour

[ghostclvb]

IS ANYBODY ELSE AWAKE BC IM LOSING MY GODDAMN MIND

[captainstudmuffin-deactivated20]

@lifeinahole27

[lifeinahole27]

Thank you for making an office of two adjuncts laugh today.

[wellhellotragic]

@lifeinahole27

When there’s 2 Taiwan Joneses, who both go to Howard, and neither of them know who failed yet

[kairelite]

Update!

[cheese24k]

Mama cat encourages her kitten to escape

[thotwing-deactivated20190613]

THE MAMA CAT IS SO PROUD OF HER KITTEN

[airyairyquitecontrary-deactivat]

WELL DONE NOW I MUST VIOLENTLY WASH YOU

[rockhardgeologist]

A prodigy

[sindri42]

You missed the best part. They weren’t even their sheep. This good pupper gathered up a bunch of random sheep it found somewhere on the countryside and brought them home for its human.

[cryoverkiltmilk]

*whispers* the countryside is full of free sheep

[theleafriday]

[marcitlali]

imagine being the first amish bitch in your village to like get your body done like ass shots titties done and like beat face contoured… and then you walked into like the saloon or whatever amish people have and everyone dropped their irish fiddles and was shookedt? like everyone churning butter was just in shock and you walked across the artisanal wood floors in your wantmylook.com thigh high lace up heeled boots like your life depended on it… yes god

[istillfuckwithdemilovato-deacti]

my mans jedediah looks away in humility but you KNOW he’s churnin butter that night……milkin a different cow…..

[blkreginageorge-deactivated2017]

Why y'all doing this when you know the Amish are not here to defend themselves.

[whiteteethteens]

just in case we lose this legendary post due to titty restrictions

[typecozey-deactivated20201222]

[rtrixie]

Develop a roomba that reacts to being petted and you’re going to make bank with millennials

[heatandapathy]

Don’t forget to give it a little screen so it can flash up emoticon faces.

*bump into wall* >_<

*gets pet* :3

*low battery* ;_;

*stick on a ledge* D:

*sucks up something it’s not supposed to* >:3c

[zforzelma]

I loathe how badly I want this.