If You Don’t Have Coffee, Don’t Talk To Me

Darkiplier ask blog, please no nsfw asks, mun’s name is Ethan, main blog is the-pan-anon

[coffee-and-cats]

Wilford said he wanted me to ’interact with people’ more instead of locking myself in my office for days on end. This is my solution. If you want to talk to me I accept an offering of coffee, otherwise leave me alone and let me work.

[unicouniuni]

2020.06.20

[0palheart]

Me when im in an area

[catsuggest]

good morninge !

[mollycatmeow]

Hi cat, what's on the agenda for today?

[catsuggest]

[everythingfox]

What is this magic

(via)

[furfag]

u like to be scratched and pet? congratulations, mammal

[everythingfox]

Nap time

[justcatposts]

[babyanimalgifs]

Huskys gonna husky 🤗 

TikTok/viceugenio

[utopians]

after a thorough medical assessment, the doctors have described me as ‘a lot. just like a lot to deal with’

[justcatposts]

“Every morning my wife and I get booped awake“ 

(via)

[children-of-bast]

MOTHER, I HUNGER.

(watch with sound on)

[spacey-3yes]

god does it ache

[coffee-and-cats]

i come bringing coffee this time! but i don't know what kind you like so i just bought everything on the starbucks menu and now my car's full of coffee. take your pick!

“...” Dark looks very surprised. “You...bought an entire car’s worth of coffee?! ...Well normally I prefer black as you don’t have to take the time or energy to add anything to it, but if you’re offering I’ll take all of it.”

Dark if you drink all of that coffee it’s going to kill-

“I said I’ll take all of it.”

[tikkety-tok]

My cats trying to fit into this shelf.

[coffee-and-cats]

hi dark! how are you and wilford doing today? :D

Dark narrows their eyes at you. “I’m sensing a lack of coffee offerings.” Then, after a moment, they sigh and shrug. “I’m well, simply getting a bit of work done-”

A BIT?! WORKING FOR TWO FUCKING DAYS STRAIGHT JUST TO FINISH A FEW THINGS ISN’T A BIT!! GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP AND STOP HARASSING PEOPLE FOR COFFEE! A voice yells from....somewhere on the other side of the office. You can’t see who yelled it, it looks like it’s only you and Dark in the office.

Dark flips the voice off and then continues as if nothing had happened. “I haven’t seen Will since this morning but I assume he’s well, probably off murdering people, or interviewing people, or both.”