Det. Colin Zabel

tryin’ out this thing I guess.

[colinzabes]

still here detective? I'd love to chat:3

yep! 👋 just busy workin’ on those case files, I guess…

[colinzabes]

Merry Christmas! 🎅

[colinzabes]

you still here, detective? (batting my eyelashes)

of course! just waitin’ for someone to come n’ chat :)

[colinzabes]

hi colin ^_^

hey!!

[colinzabes]

hey detective!! how does it feel knowing u have several people on ur silly phone thirsting over u?

Well, I’ll be honest—I didn’t exactly have that on my bingo card.

Feels kinda weird, not gonna lie. I mean, I’m usually just usin’ this ‘silly phone’ to check case files or call my mom. But uh, thanks? I’m flattered… and a little confused. Y’all are somethin’ else.

[colinzabes]

You could get it btw

Oh—uh… wow. That’s—uh, bold. Real bold.

Appreciate the confidence though. I mean… good to know I still got somethin’ goin’ for me, I guess? Ya got me blushin’ over here, darlin’.

[colinzabes]

Did anyone ever tell you?

That you’re way too pretty? Like way too pretty- it’s actually unfair. You also have beautiful eyes detective. I’m jealous. Just thought you should know :)

Aw jeez… That’s—uh, that’s real nice of ya to say.

Thanks for makin’ my day a little brighter. You’re sweet!

[colinzabes]

i got blue contacts and a dream

Well, that’s a solid start. Keep chasin’ that dream.

..unless it’s somethin’ illegal, then… maybe rethink it.

[colinzabes]

Wanna go on a date, detective?

Do you mean it? I mean.. couldn’t go wrong with givin’ it a try, right?

[colinzabes]

I have blue eyes detective, but I'm 5'6"😔

Uh huh. Real subtle there.

Y’know, just ‘cause ya put anon doesn’t mean you’re as sneaky as you think you are.

But hey, nice try. M’ a Detective, remember? I put clues together for a livin’. ;)

[colinzabes]

How was your Valentine's Day, Detective Zabel?

Y’know, just like any other day. Nothin’ special. Went to work, grabbed a beer after. S’ just not my kinda holiday these days. I hope you had a good one.

[colinzabes]

do you remember me? you stopped me for driving with an expired license and i immediately balled my eyes out😄

oh, uh.. I stop a lotta people. but people cryin’??.. hope I wasn’t too tough on ya.

But hey, if it makes you feel better I probably felt just as bad about it as you did. I hope ya got that license thing sorted out!

[colinzabes]

I’m 5’3 and have double Ds, would you sneak a glance at me, hm Detective~

I- Uhm- who.. who knows? Maybe?

[colinzabes]

how does it feel to know you have your face on the transgender flag I have hanging on my room

I mean, that’s like— really cool — but why my face?

[colinzabes]

Let's talk about physical beauty (let's face it, we all have a preference). What attracts you most physically in a woman? I'm white with brown hair, green eyes and an hourglass body. In a pub, would I catch your eye?

Uh.. I dunno, never sat down and thought of a list or anythin’. I guess noticeable traits for me are eyes.. and a warm smile. S’ also cute when they’re shorter than me. Maybe around 5’3 or so is cute. All eye colors are nice, but I think my preference is blue..

And.. would ya catch my eye? I mean, probably, but if we’re bein’ real honest here, you wouldn’t really know. I’m the typa guy to sneak glances.. n’ overthink about it.. instead of talkin’ to you I’d stay glued in my seat, sippin’ on my beer. :-]

I don’t think I’d have the courage to speak to a pretty woman when I see one, y’know? M’ not the best lookin’ guy, why would a pretty woman want me?

(and.. I don’t wanna make a fool of myself.)

[colinzabes]

Gyatt means ass, detective. They're saying you have a voluptuous (big) ass.

Who the hell is makin’ up these words anyways? Gyatt? Skibidi? What the hell!!

[colinzabes]

My day was fine, but I have one REALLY important question: What would I have to do to wife you up?

first off; I dunno what you’re thinkin’ but I’m a guy.. uhm.. so I’d technically be a husband.. so I guess, unfortunately, ‘wifin’’ me up is off the charts—

And second off; why is there a mischievous bag o’ popcorn..?