collar bones @collar-bones-tho-blog - Tumblr Blog

I wish I’d never met you,

I wish you never told me you loved me,

I wish you never even knew my fucking name,

I hate you, I hate you,

I’ll say it over and over again.

You left me when I was trying to die.

And why the hatred? How fucking dare you ask why.

bathofbleach-blog

Remembering just how worthless I may be, Remembering how I wish I was anyone but me.

You told me you were going to marry me. If it's the last thing you did. Yet here I am. Without you. And I don't want you, Need you, Nor crave you. I'm happy, in fact. So happy it hurts. I feel like I'm going to burst, Because I'm filled with so much joy. And I stand, No longer a broken man, Nor one who needs you to hold my hand. I learnt isolation, And I learnt desperation. And now I've learnt I am better off without you.

Cravings. Why after such a long time, After such happiness and purity, Do I crave you, my sweetheart, My lover, the one who comforted me on my darkest nights, And greeted me on my lazy mornings, Why do I crave such a feeling again? I'm happy now, and i am content, I do not need your paranoid love, I do not crave you, I will tell myself over and over, I just wish to feel you once more, Maybe twice, or just every day, I wish for you so much, But I know that is an invite to darkness, Why do I crave you, such an expensive habit, Costing me my health and my sanity, Why do I want you again? White powder, thats all you are, Just white powder. But you haunt me, in my dreams, In my sad moments, When I wish to feel happy again, Overly over-joyed, Intensely numb. I remember the good with the bad, Yet I still want you. Don't start doing drugs, Don't start doing drugs, They'll creep into your mind, And convince you that you're in love with them. I'm not in love with you, White powder, thats all that you are, I was just in love with feeling numb, When I didn't want to feel at all.

Addictions

#poetry #poem #drugs #drug #cravings #clean