I think I&#x27;m Hot Shit

Since you’re very grown up and decided to send this message before quickly blocking me, I decided to make it public. I’m not going to be silenced by a child who doesn’t realise how terrible she is.

Don’t privately message me because: a) you don’t know me either, b) I really don’t like you after reading the hypocritical, belittling nonsense in your “PSA"s, c) you need to get over yourself, and finally d) I was informed of the situation and actually did my research. Thanks!

Is this bitch for real? She has a lot to say but doesn’t want to hear any back? Lulz. In that case, here’s some advice for you heircss: Keep your head down and your mouth shut, little girl. It’ll go way better for you in the long run.

The quality of lipstickdrcgon's friend named Kaitie (heircss) says a lot about Ducky. Kaitie is an enabler. Ducky is a bully. Generally, I avoid people who support bullies and silence victims. Everyone can make their own choices, but the evidence is mounting that Ducky and Kaitie, at the very least, are not nice people and enjoy bullying others. I'd like to point out, if you didn't want something reblogged, then perhaps you shouldn't have posted it in the first place, Kaitie.

#heircss #lipstickdrcgon

Everything Is Not Just Ducky

Let me see here:

You made a blog that is a dup of a character of a person who called you out on the day they call you out.

You admitted to being a shady bitch, but then finger pointed at others for listening to your bullshit lies.

You wrote a long post and said it would be the last you had to say about it.

Then you kept posting about it because you’re a liar and manipulator.

For good measure to be sure your manipulation tactics were doubled down on, you promo’d random people.

You made gratuitous posts about loving people you don’t actually even know or name.

Based on your posts and behavior, here’s what you need to know:

You’ve come to my attention, and that’s not something to preen over. I’m not a puppy dog. I don’t like bullies. I don’t like abusers. I don’t like YOU.

You’re trashy, fake and no matter how many blogs you make, Denise, you can’t hide how ugly and cruel you are. Take your three friends and their 20 blogs and go hide away. Stop looking at other peoples’ blogs. Stop stealing characterizations. Stop belittling people in private, then smiling at their face. Nice people don’t do what you do. Don’t say you obviously need to change, then keep doing what you’ve always done. GTFO tumblr and go get real help for your issues.

P.S. Stop calling people puppy dogs ooc. It shows what a fucking bitch you really are that you think that’s okay and cute. It’s not.

How many times have we seen this happen now? This is what manipulators do. They target certain people. In Ducky’s case she goes for kind people to take pity on her, in Lindsay’s case it’s naive people or people who are just as bad as her. They need these people to get away with what they’re doing. They need people to defend them and cover for them when they get called out on their abuse, but these “friends” become targets of that abuse too.

I’ve had a lot of people message me saying that they didn’t realise how manipulative Lindsay was until they got away from her. This is true for so many cases of abuse, whether it’s mental or physical. People don’t realise how bad it is until they get out. Then there’s the defenders who haven’t become targets yet. They’ll use the excuse that “well, she’s been nothing but nice to me,” like that excuses or cancels out what’s been done to other ppl.

Both Lindsay and Ducky have used excuses about knowing they need to change, but neither have made the effort to do so. They’ve just blamed other people. When you carry on as you are, with the same repeated abuse on multiple people, you haven’t made an effort to change and you definitely aren’t sorry.

byebyebyemoved-deactivated20170

People like Ducky and Lindsay are best avoided, if possible. I understand a lot of people may not know at first how another person may be toxic to them. In the cases of Ducky and Lindsay the proof and experiences of others should serve as fair warning.

The best advice I have received about avoiding nasty people came from a davinamarshall member:

“How someone talks to you about others is how they talk about you behind your back.”

The moment someone starts badmouthing another person out of the blue in private, you should back away from them. They have an agenda, and it’s not going to be a nice one.

#lipstickdrcgon

Disclaimer:This call out post is simply to bring to light some horrificbehaviour, I am in no way or form telling you to stop roleplayingwith this person, these things simply need to be bought to light–enough is enough. TW: foul language, emotionalmanipulation, general drama.

trybelievingx-deactivated201701

bcdelia

This is a call out post for Ducky (aka @lipstickdrcgon / @smaragdhexe / @worsethanevil ). Before I start I want to make a trigger warning disclaimer on the topic of gaslighting (which is a form of emotional abuse), some incredibly hurtful language, and obviously has a component of drama in it.

Also as a disclaimer, I am not here to say that you CANNOT write with her but just understand that she had done some incredibly hurtful things to not only myself but MANY others. This post is to pose as an informative to maybe, allow those who do not wish to be entangled in such drama to avoid stressful things on the Tumblr Roleplaying scene. I, cannot dictate who a person can write with or not but I just want to warn the community that had given me some of the best times in all my years of writing here.

Let’s start off with Ducky and I. So Ducky and I we used to be friends, pretty good friends I would say – in fact, so good that she was one of my main ships and we talked pretty much daily OOC. At first Ducky seemed incredibly lovely, she always made some of the nicest PSAs out there, and she was always apologizing for stuff – which at the time, I saw and I honestly thought she was the victim of everything. I felt so sorry for her – especially when she told me the story of how she once RPed a character and a double of her character went exclusive with everyone she was writing with, and how she cried three weeks straight. But of course, this wasn’t it. There was another friend who she’s spun lies about – she made me believe that she was an abuser, someone who abused her. I felt so sorry for her – I was willing to fight tooth and nail for her, fight anyone who had hurt her honestly.

But then September happened when she made her Maleficent blog. For me, it was then that something felt off about her – some reason she’s made me really uncomfortable. For a while I didn’t want to approach her because I know that she would blame herself – I didn’t want her to feel bad, I wanted her to be aware that her behaviour isn’t okay and it’s not an attack on her personally. So, after a while I decided to talk to her on skype, here are the chat logs (i blurred some URLS because I don’t think they want to be namedropped):

CLICK THIS FOR THE IMGUR ALBUM

As you can see from the overall consensus of the log I had of one of our very last conversations, I have been trying to keep my patience with her. I didn’t want her to feel that she was a bad person but rather to address her flaws. However, throughout the post she had been said some things that people should be aware of:

Exhibit A:

“ Okay. Look, let’s talk about this. I might sound like a big asshole now, but the only reason I went exclusive with her is because of Cat. She has a Mal, she roleplays with her on Bedelia, and I thought it might piss her off. ”

Let’s talk about this. Okay, so the Bedelia she is referring is actually the lovely @bcdelia. She’s being incredibly vindictive here. Now, she’s painted Cat as an abuser for me in the past so when I first saw it – I was appalled at her action yet, but I found it justifiable because nobody should forgive their abuser. However, recently Cat and I had made up (I’ve apologized for having those thoughts of her) and I’ve learned that it was actually the opposite. She, was gaslighting – painting herself as the perfect victim for me to pity. I look back at this now and realize how incredibly viscous she is which is VERY sickening. It’s as if she wants to drive Cat off the tumblr roleplay scene even – which, is in my honest opinion very immature.

Exhibit B:

Here, she is clearly painting herself as the victim – making it for me to pity her. Mind all of you, this conversation happened before I officially decided to cut her loose. I’ve felt bad for her – I didn’t want to make her feel the way she felt but then I realized, it wasn’t worth it.

Soon after the both of us mutually agreed to have some distance because it’s the best to cool things down. However, whilst I felt like I’ve been always wondering about how she’s been doing and all, I felt easily replaced. She continued to roleplay with others and only spoke to me when I unfollowed her off my dashboard because her presence was making me anxious. I’m a university student, at one of the best universities in the world – while I do thank my parents for letting me attend such a prestigious school, I was also overwhelmed with anxiety and the last thing I needed to do was to have something that is supposed to de-stress me, stress me out more. So for my mental health, I unfollowed her – it wasn’t anything personal at all.

A while later I felt that we weren’t going to make up – so I removed her off skype, hoping that if she felt otherwise she would at least message me on Tumblr or kik. Wrong. She didn’t. Instead, she went behind my back to a close friend to talk about me.

HERE IS THE LINK TO WHAT SHE SAID ABOUT ME

A friend showed me this – a really close one too, one I hung out with in real life and had really in depth conversations with too. So to think she said that to her gives me two impressions:

I felt like I wasted my time with her (see the first album link) because I spent a good two hours talking to her, making sure she isn’t being too hard on herself. Instead, I get painted as the villain for making her cry.

She’s actively trying to destroy my friendship just because we had a falling out. I was honestly not even angry or upset because I understand that people part ways all the time and whilst is was incredibly saddening for me, I just let things go with the flow. Then, of course, she tries to talk to one of my best friends about it. Listen, falling out is a two people thing so trying to separate someone from their friends is terrible. Now, I’m usually a fairly nice person about stuff because I do hate drama – I have a shit load of real life drama and I don’t need this.

I don’t need not only someone who has a BIG ASS VICTIM COMPLEX but I most certainly do not need someone who treats their friends as if they are disposable. I do, have the consent of my friend Jenna to talk about this. A while ago, Ducky told a friend of ours about stuff on Jenna – they were extremely cruel.

HERE ARE JUST A FEW EXAMPLES

I’m here to respect Jenna’s request to not focus on her too much but she said this to me:

[17/11/2015 10:52:51 PM] (essay) chrissy || wiickedly.: she mentioned you to me a bit in my fall out with her [17/11/2015 10:52:54 PM] ❤ѕιвєℓℓα❤: i know I’m mentioned in some stuff [17/11/2015 10:52:55 PM] ❤ѕιвєℓℓα❤: yeah [17/11/2015 10:53:11 PM] (essay) chrissy || wiickedly.: is it okay if i post her logs about you but just [17/11/2015 10:53:15 PM] (essay) chrissy || wiickedly.: blur out your name [17/11/2015 10:53:48 PM] ❤ѕιвєℓℓα❤: That’s fine. Just make sure that you make it clear that I was shamed into not writing smut at all by her and it got to a point where I was embarrassed to post anything nsfw and still am [17/11/2015 10:54:33 PM] (essay) chrissy || wiickedly.: okay! is it okay if i also just posted ^that as well ?? [17/11/2015 10:54:52 PM] (essay) chrissy || wiickedly.: i wont put too much focus on you [17/11/2015 10:54:57 PM] ❤ѕιвєℓℓα❤: yeah sure

I feel like you should see for yourself. Also to top it off, Jenna had also mentioned how she strung her along – promising that they would RP but never do and always gloating to her about plots she can’t write because DUCKY was too busy writing them with ME at the time. Even though in ways, I did benefit off of Ducky’s actions – I was kept in the dark, I had NO clue she said this to Jenna. This is NOT okay, like never – mind you, she and Jenna were still friends then. Jenna cut Ducky loose for her own reasons but this was WHILST they were friends, in fact everything I’ve submitted in my album is something she said while they were friends. This just shows how two faced she is.

I know we’ve all complained about our friends – but not to an extent like this, this is just blatantly slandering and shaming. Friends don’t shame each other like this – if you don’t like something, don’t make someone feel bad about liking it.

[1:58:39 AM] ❤ѕιвєℓℓα❤: Like I still do write nsfw but ngl I’ve legit hit a point where I almost cut off certain partners because I knew I had done a lot of smut with them [1:58:44 AM] ❤ѕιвєℓℓα❤: Like how shitty is that? [1:59:15 AM] ❤ѕιвєℓℓα❤: Like to this day there are partners of mine like, some of my favorites that I just can’t stomach writing with anymore because of how guilty I feel

[2:07:17 AM] ❤ѕιвєℓℓα❤: I’ve spent literally weeklong periods of time not wanting to post because I knew I had mostly old smut threads to do [2:07:33 AM] ❤ѕιвєℓℓα❤: If you’ll note now, I’ve stopped writing it publicly for the most part

I’m not going to say that I’m a saint and I’m flawless, because I have warned her to her a few people that I am GENUINELY concerned about. Her behaviour is extremely manipulative and most times you wouldn’t even know until it’s too late – she guiltrips you to the point where you just can’t take it any more and you have to drop her. Now, I’m doing a public call out because I had made some vague posts that she would stop “checking up” on myself and Cat but now I’m at a point where I cannot deal with this any more.

All I want is to be left alone and yet here she is trying to wreck not only my roleplaying experience but my friendships. This is not okay – and no one should EVER go through this. Again, I want to emphasize that I am in no way, shape, or form telling people not to write with her but she had hurt and made more than a handful of people uncomfortable that I think it warrants a public warning at this point.

TL; DR DUCKY IS MANIPULATIVE AND TWO FACED, PROCEED WITH CAUTION WHEN INTERACTING.

My names Cat, writer of bcdelia and positivelymcral. This is an issue that has needed addressing for a long time, and I am honestly relieved it is all coming to light now. Over the span of about amonth, I have been called ‘an abuser’, ‘a cunt’, and have lost ahandful of people I thought of as friends; all because of one person and her victim complex. Now, I have vague blogged, that much I'mowning up to, and yes that was childish of me, but I was so angry, Iwas so hurt that I needed to get it out somehow. But in the grand scheme of things, I do not deserve what was said about me, nor what happened to me. The same can be said for the other people who have suffered in the same situation that I am in. I was friends with Ducky (letterstonora, dinosaurbandaids, lipstickdrcgon) for awhile, and for the longest time I thought we were golden, yes we didn’t talk every single day since I started my new job, but I made an effort when I could; because she was such a wonderful person to talk to, she was always there when I needed her, and I appreciated her immensely. But work got in the way, and I was working a butt loadof hours. This saw a drop in communication between myself and Ducky,which admittedly I didn’t think too much of at the time, I knew she was busy with her own things, so I figured that if she wanted to talk to me, she’d reach out; perhaps I should have reached out. But then I came home one day to find Ducky had unfollowed me on both her blogs,and I finally reached out on skype:

(imguralbum of that conversation)

I came out of that conversation feeling like a horrible person– that I was somehow the worst person in the entire work and had perhaps slacked horribly in my friendship. But at the same time, I wasworking. I have bills to pay, and my real life will always comefirst. But regardless, things were fine after that, perhaps a littletense but she was still Ducky, still my friend. However, there came a point where I didn’t receive a message back to my last message to her, and I decided enough was enough; I figured she had wanted to back off again, and that the best thing for me to do was give her some space, cut off all ties. I deleted her from skype, I sent amessage her to letterstonora blog. Now, I do not have a log of the exact message I sent, being that the tumblr outbox hadn’t been implemented yet, but it was along the lines of:

I just wanted to let you know that I removed you from my Skype a few days ago. We hadn’t talked in a while and I felt that our friendship was over and that it seemed logical to remove you.; SoI heard nothing back after that, and I decided to try once more, tomake sure she knew where I was coming from with all of this. Thistime, I used KiK. It took two tries to get a response back, and to behonest I felt good once this was all said and done; we both agreed topart ways, she’d go her way, and I’d go mine. I didn’t want any badblood, and I honestly thought this would be the end of it.

Fast forward to maybe a week or so after this? I receive a message fromsomeone I had not expected; wiickedly. Long story short, Ducky had been talking smack about me to Chrissy, saying the most disgusting things about what I had apparently done. Me and Chrissy hadn’t exactly been on the best terms before all of this anyway, but with us both finally seeing what was really going on, we made up and I found out more then I was really expecting to.

Ducky,on her maleficent blog, decided to go exclusive with someone I have been friends with for quite some time, something which really didn’t bother me because I wasn’t even using my Maleficent blog; I hadn’t been active on her for months by this stage. And I am not about totell someone not to write with someone, they can form their ownopinions on the matters at hand. Still, the name calling bothered me,as did the fact that Ducky had been going to as many people as she could, telling them that I ‘simply couldn’t handle someone having the same blog as me’, that I had emotionally abused her. I have triedmy hardest to keep my head about all of the lies that have beenspread about me, because that is what they are, lies.But at this stage, I am simply tired of it all. Recently I found outshe has been ‘checking up’ on both mine and Chrissys blogs, and all Iwant is to be left alone, please stop bad mouthing me to my friends,then vagueblogging about how 'people are talking shit about me’,because none of us are saying a single thing. We want to move on,just please let this die and move on with your life. Do not keepchecking up on my blog, do not try to turn my friends against mebecause they are my friends for a reason. You have made peopleuncomfortable with this behaviour, and I do not appreciate peoplehaving to come to me and clear issues because you havebeen in their ear talking smack about me.

(imguralbum for ruth/amanda here)

Ruthis a dear friend of mine, as is Amanda. The fact that you deem it alright to treat people this way is disgusting, and I hate that I did not simply bow out sooner. Perhaps I would have saved myself a world of hurt. These sorts of things always seem to find a way of coming back around, people talk and things get found out; I am in no way innocent of this, but I am not vindictive, nor have I ever trash talked the way you have. Especially about people I KNEW youwere friends with– that’s rude and it’s cruel. This is not beingdone to hurt you, but you need to be aware that the way you havetreated me, the way you have treated countless others, is not okay.It’s not right.

This is the last thing I will EVER say on this matter. Stay off my blog,do not talk about me. Move on with your life, and I will move on with mine. To reiterate what I said earlier, this is not me telling you to not write with Ducky, I simply think this warning needs to be read.

TL; DR DUCKY IS MANIPULATIVE AND TWO FACED, PROCEED WITH CAUTION WHEN INTERACTING.

Hello, I’m Jenna. I’ve spent a while contemplating over whether or not I wanted to become so far involved with all of this to a point where I could make an addition to this post but, after reading through all of this and seeing a lot of Skype logs that I had never seen before until today, I knew I had to say something or forever hold my peace on the matter. I don’t have any fancy ass references and pictures, everything you need is written in the original post itself.

It all boils down to emotional manipulation for me. For a year, I was emotionally manipulated and I’m going to start right now by apologizing to every partner that I’ve stopped writing with as much because you all deserve that and more. I’ve become so self conscious about my own blog’s content because of Ducky that I feel as though most of my motivation for writing is gone sometimes because I’ve become too embarrassed to write with some of my oldest and most favorite partners.

I suppose I should start at the beginning. Ducky and I became friends in my first year of writing Tink, within the first several months and we hit it off just fine. Then she made her first incarnation of Evanora and we plotted a lot, things were fine and for about five months or so, we shipped our characters. Business as usual. I didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary until suddenly our threads turned really sour with only the explanation that we had somehow ‘forced’ our characters or rather, that I had forced our characters to be something we were not. I’ll start there by saying that I would never force ship anything. As far as I was concerned, we followed the natural shipping course and she had caused our characters to sour. I wasn’t sure why.

Suddenly she wouldn’t write with me at all but would continue to talk to me about her muse and sent me pictures constantly but at the time, I was still confused as to why we had even stopped writing at all. She wouldn’t answer things I sent her, she wouldn’t give our threads the time of day if we had them. So I asked her to stop talking to me about her muse until I got my head on straight.

She stopped speaking to me for at least a month, if not more, at that point.

Now all the while she’d occasionally mention how she hates seeing smut on her dash and me, being a newer roleplayer at the time, thought smut was just fun or whatever but never thought anything of it. But I didn’t realize it was making me self conscious. The more she talks to me about it, the more uncomfortable I felt, I stopped writing it all together. You can see the Skype logs in the original post for more information there but essentially after a while, I felt ashamed to post anything nsfw. I’d avoid it like the plague to the point where I felt sick.

And that’s not okay, I know that’s not okay and I’ve always known it. But the manipulation held anyways and to this day, I still really get uncomfortable writing public smut. I still do but it’s something I tend to put off now. It’s a slow process, I’m working on it and I’ll leave it at that.

But anyways, so then we sort of found each other again but writing wasn’t really working still because we would talk and plot but then something would come up. As in, Ducky would throw out some sort of excuse as to why we couldn’t write now. It was always excuses and reasons and ‘but you don’t xyz’s.

Then I made my Zelena and things got worse. Yes I do have a Zelena account, she’s private and I use her for threads out of my own satisfaction but I’ve got her in the wings if I need her. I’m not going to give the url out publicly, however. She tried to push both of her muses on me at the time (Evanora and Maleficent) but I didn’t want to ship with her. So she would throw out petty remarks about my character (my personal character not my written character) and how I choose to write my muse.

I suppose all of that character drama though is water under the bridge at this point, though. What I think matters more is what was happening where I couldn’t see it. Ducky at one point called me one of her closest friends on Tumblr. I don’t have that exact receipt but I do have this:

“[2015-09-08, 11:06:27 AM] Ducky: She’s one of my oldest friends on here…”

But in the past week, a lot has come to light to me in regards to what that statement really meant. Ducky has spoken behind my back a lot. And we all do that when we’re upset. But I have so many more logs from friends that aren’t on this post of her insulting what I write and who I choose to write with. Not to mention slandering me and calling me a force shipper when I would never do anything of the sort. These logs span all the way back into 2014. Almost the entire duration of our friendship, she would talk about me behind my back and soil what little reputation I have to total strangers at the time.

I was initially against making this sort of post, but Ducky herself has said that if you’ve hurt enough people, that’s enough to warrant warnings about you. And so here I am. Here I am realizing that I was emotionally manipulated for over a year into a complex I still struggle with on my blog to this day. Here I am hurt, realizing that somebody I had thought I was close to had been saying horrible, hurtful things behind my back for over a year.

And if she’s saying that about me? You can be damned sure (and I am, I have the logs) that she’s doing it about every ‘friend’ she’s got.

TLDR: Take care of yourselves and never be like me, don’t let other people ruin something you enjoy because it never ends well on either side.

drxmeda

Hi, I’m Ruth. I knew Ducky over a year ago. At the time, I was young and had less than stellar self-esteem. We had a fight, and I moved on immediately, and have recently discovered that the same cannot be said of Ducky.

The people she collects are consistently kind, loyal friends. Ducky collects people with a lot of kindness and pity for her, and she plays the victim and the pitiable part. She feeds off of this kindness. Friendship with Ducky is almost never equal. She feeds off other people, consistently. It may not seem like abuse, because she seems so helpless, but it is emotional abuse through extreme passive aggressiveness, and parasitic tendencies and she is more controlling than people understand while being her friend. Symptoms any friend of hers will notice is that she is self-deprecating, and relies on people to cheer her up. Now, on this fact alone, there is nothing wrong with this. Everyone needs that sometimes. The only time when she is not self-deprecating is when she is self-righteous. To listen to Ducky, one would think she has had the worst luck in the world. She claims I have been abusive, a liar, malicious, obsessive over her – and she calls people names, mocks them for their triggers, criticizes even her best friends behind their backs and is generally passive aggressive. If her passive aggressiveness does not move you to pity for her, her guilt-tripping will.

Keep reading

#lipstickdrcgon #fyi #abuser #abusive

drxmeda

trybelievingx:

bcdelia

wiickedly

CLICK THIS FOR THE IMGUR ALBUM

Exhibit A:

Let’s talk about this. Okay, so the Bedelia she is referring is actually the lovely @bcdelia. She’s being incredibly vindictive here. Now, she’s painted Cat as an abuser for me in the past so when I first saw it – I was appalled at her action yet, but I found it justifiable because nobody should forgive their abuser. However, recently Cat and I had made up (I’ve apologized for having those thoughts of her) and I’ve learned that it was actually the opposite. She, was gaslighting – painting herself as the perfect victim for me to pity. I look back at this now and realize how incredibly viscous she is which is VERYsickening. It’s as if she wants to drive Cat off the tumblr roleplay scene even – which, is in my honest opinion very immature.

Exhibit B:

HERE IS THE LINK TO WHAT SHE SAID ABOUT ME

A friend showed me this – a really close one too, one I hung out with in real life and had really in depth conversations with too. So to think she said that to her gives me two impressions:

HERE ARE JUST A FEW EXAMPLES

I’m here to respect Jenna’s request to not focus on her too much but she said this to me:

I feel like you should see for yourself. Also to top it off, Jenna had also mentioned how she strung her along – promising that they would RP but never do and always gloating to her about plots she can’t write becauseDUCKY was too busy writing them with ME at the time. Even though in ways, I did benefit off of Ducky’s actions – I was kept in the dark, I had NOclue she said this to Jenna. This is NOT okay, like never – mind you, she and Jenna were still friends then. Jenna cut Ducky loose for her own reasons but this was WHILST they were friends, in fact everything I’ve submitted in my album is something she said while they were friends. This just shows how two faced she is.

TL; DR DUCKY IS MANIPULATIVE AND TWO FACED, PROCEED WITH CAUTION WHEN INTERACTING.

(imguralbum of that conversation)

(imguralbum for ruth/amanda here)

TL; DR DUCKY IS MANIPULATIVE AND TWO FACED, PROCEED WITH CAUTION WHEN INTERACTING.

She stopped speaking to me for at least a month, if not more, at that point.

“[2015-09-08, 11:06:27 AM] Ducky: She’s one of my oldest friends on here…”

And if she’s saying that about me? You can be damned sure (and I am, I have the logs) that she’s doing it about every ‘friend’ she’s got.

TLDR: Take care of yourselves and never be like me, don’t let other people ruin something you enjoy because it never ends well on either side.

Ducky made an Andromeda account, and I said hi to her, because I was an Andromeda account, too. It wasn’t a big deal, to me a least. We spoke for a while, before I began to realize that Ducky was a very needy, clingy person. She would apologize for this incessantly, and I really cared for her. Here is the part of the story that gets a little foggy – Ducky claims I have been spreading transcripts of our conversations. Firstly, the fact she claims this shows she understands she was in the wrong. Secondly, I really haven’t because I can’t even share them now. I got a new computer the December after I met her, and haven’t had the chat log since, nor would I care to.

I was already triggered earlier in the day because I was living in an abusive home. My trigger is confrontation, and I understand sometimes it is necessary, but she chose to confront me while I was already a sobbing mess. Ducky spoke to me, and I was triggered again, shivering and sobbing and panicking – you get the picture. I asked her not to contact me until I contacted her, because I needed space after what she did. She apologized, I forgave her immediately and only asked to be given space for a week or so. The very next day, or the day after, Ducky messaged me again. She said she would delete her blog as penance if I asked her to. I said I was furious: this was another emotionally abusive tact she had taken. It’s the equivalent of having a fight with your S/O, and her saying she would self-harm as penance. Ducky and I spoke, I was triggered again, and I told her that I would never, under any circumstances, tell her what to do with her blog. She should stay or delete depending on whether or not she wanted to do so, because I was not in charge of her. She stayed.

In the next few days, I was furious with her. I can honestly say it’s the only time in the last four years where I have been angry enough to shout at another human being. I talked to two friends about it, and these two people are the only other people who know anything about the falling out. I sent her an essay, dissecting the arguments we had had and I told her to leave me alone for good. I blocked her on skype, unfollowed her, and she did the same. I also asked she refrain from vague blogging (something she has been wont to do) and in return, so would I. Another clause was that she would not bitch about me, and I’d refrain from doing the same. Immediately, Ducky sent her friend who used to be at the url ursamxjor to talk to me. I purposefully refrained from talking about Ducky. That really set the tone for, quite literally, the next year of my life. I never talked about Ducky, because just because she was horrible to me did not mean I should warn people off her so she’d not have friends. People make mistakes. I moved on, and I just assumed Ducky had as well.

She rejoined the fandom, I paid very little attention. I want to stress that in my view, our fight happened over a year ago and I just didn’t mind that Ducky seemed to be walking around. In fact, reading over the callout post is really freaky, becuase I had no she was still so obsessional about me. And truly, when someone has a disagreement with you over a year ago and you still go out of your way to spite them and bring them up in conversations with anyone who will listen – that is obsessional.

It makes me incredibly anxious to see that there are people on my dash who follow me, but won’t interact with me because they are afraid of Ducky’s reaction. It makes me anxious to see people saying things like “and Ruth is a shitty person so what she’s saying to you is PURPOSELY trying to make you feel bad.” - (essay) chrissy || wiickedly., Thursday 17 September 2015 20:27. Chrissy told me about it – and I don’t fault Chrissy for this. Ducky has been spreading lies about so virulently, that the only reason I want to be a part of this callout is to say that I am not a horrible person, and none of Ducky’s ‘ex-friends’ are. Ducky only becomes friends with people who are exceedingly patient and kind. They are the only ones who can put up with her. Once she is done with you, even though she leeches and demands you not show any self-love, she will be the victim. I am over the fight I had with her – I simply don’t care about it anymore. I’ve moved on. I care that I am being slandered, and I care that all these wonderful, kind, patient people have been hurt because that’s just Ducky’scycle.

She makes muses of the people who have left her, to steal their partners. She admitted to my main writing partner that she was planning on stealing her, if not for the fact we were friends at the time. If she seems someone talking to me, she unfollows them, which is incredibly controlling behaviour. She apologizes gratuitously, but she never, ever, ever changes. She lies, she victimizes herself, and she leeches off of patience and kindness. Ducky might seem like an injured little lamb, but in reality she has a lot more power over her friends than anyone realizes. I should know, I was once her friend. All these people she has hurt were once her friends, and she quite purposefully goes out of her way to hurt them. I honestly just want people to understand that I am not cruel or malicious, like I’ve been painted to be.

http://lindsayfussell.tumblr.com/post/119753081664/davinamarshall-anaxpraetor-i-have-never-in

Just so you all know Lindsay self-identified her Fetal Alcohol Syndrome condition, as well as other conditions after vehemently denying she had ANY mental health conditions whatsoever for months. The post was made to manipulate people and garner sympathy because yet again she had been bullying people on tumblr and called out on it. Keep in mind, she went on to exhibit WORSE behavior as time went on. She now has a well-established track record of telling people to kill themselves, running them off their blogs and sending anonymous hate. She also has been caught lying so often, all I can do is refer you to the blogs that are documenting her behaviors. My point is, Lindsay has NOT improved her behavior. It is a continuing pattern of abuse that she exhibits. If you have an experience with her that provides further evidence of her anti-social behaviors, NO MATTER WHEN IT WAS, it is imperative that you share so a complete factual record can be made. Why?

If someone’s hurt you, you want other people to know so it doesn’t happen to them. It’s also your experience, not hers. It is your right to share whatever you wish about your life, whenever you wish. If someone tells you otherwise, they are wrong and you have to look at their motives for trying to silence you, especially if you have never spoken about it.

For the TL;DR crowd, here’s the most important part:

I was born with fetal alcohol syndrome and wouldn’t breast feed. I was an adult child of alcoholism. I’m a former bulimic. I used to do hard drugs. I’m a recovering self-harmer. I preferred branding to cutting. I remember where I was the moment the first WTC tower was hit with a plane. I remember watching the Nickelodeon version of The Tomorrow People on Nick@Nite in the mid to late 90′s. I’ve been diagnosed with severe anxiety due to my friends going to Iraq and Afghanistan. I’ve have skin cancer removed almost 3 times a year. My hair is turning white. I am pansexual. I’ve had more sexual partners than stable relationships. I have heterochromia iridum (central) eyes. I am a liberal. I am a feminist. I can’t stand onions. I love mamon chinos. I have overdosed (on accident). I’ve been robbed. I’ve been roofied. I have been bullied to self harm. I have been the bully and unaware of my actions. I am aware of my problematic behavior.

September 24th 2015, 11:54:02 am #cheers

I’ll take this as proof that Lindsay will say and do anything to manipulate people. It’s difficult to know what is fact or fiction with her.

Thank you for sending this, and I’m sorry for your experience. I’ve been through a similar thing with an abuser. It’s easy to see how Lindsay lying about something so important, to cover up another huge lie, can affect the credibility of actual victims. Not to mention how triggering it can be to see the things she posts.

What Lindsay’s doing isn’t just morally wrong, it’s illegal. You can’t threaten legal action against someone to get your own way. What would her case be? She stole someone’s identity and made up a false story for them, then talked to her friends as that person. When she was caught she didn’t admit to what she’d done, she decided to delete the evidence instead. Now she’s threatening people by claiming she’s in touch with a lawyer and refusing to give details. She’s a liar and a bully.

September 22nd 2015, 5:36:22 pm #info#psa

The lengths Lindsay will go to are incredible. Cassie and she both could easily have posted proof to the contrary if they had been telling the truth in the first place. Not to derail the topic, but Cassie did much the same thing. She got very dramatic and accusatory. She blamed others when all she had to was post a video of herself, for instance. She deleted.

This Z person could do the same, stating he is Z and he had the foundasaw blog, not Lindsay. Why is there a need for anything more other than Lindsay has been caught lying and cannot offer proof to the contrary. Instead, Cassie and Lindsay deleted the blogs they were using to pretend to be other people.

lindsayfussellisabully

Do you really not have enough balls to post that blatant bullshit on your main blog? This is the only thing I'm sending you, because this post is so full of shit, especially 'your experience' with me, that I'm not even going to sweat this. Thank you and goodbye.

They don’t “have enough balls”, as you so eloquently put it, because you send hateful messages like this. They’re protecting themselves from you bullying them further, Lindsay. We all know you harass people. I’ve had people come to me and show just how hate-filled and angry your asks to them are. I’ve experienced it for myself. A lot of what’s been posted, and it’s something a lot of people have experienced with you, are things I’ve had to deal with from you too. You know what else your victims have? Proof. This person collected so many screencaps to add to the huge pile already amassed of you attacking them and lying. It’s proven that you are a bully and continue to bully.

Don’t call your victim a liar when there are many, many others that can back them up and prove just how vile you are. Stop harassing your victims. Stop attacking people. Don’t you have an account to go and pretend to be someone else on? Maybe you could invent another friend or nameless lawyer to back you up.

#lindsay comes across like the man who raped me #she only left out #you wanted it #all he wanted to know was who said he had raped them #all i could think is how many people have you raped that you don't know #tw #trigger warning #rape #lindsay

September 21st 2015, 8:43:00 pm #info

Lindsay proved she’s a bully by sending that ask. If any of you had any doubts about that fact, I think she has cleared it up for you nicely.

Main blog, sideblog, who cares? The person’s experience and proof remain valid. When I don’t sweat something, it means I don’t worry about it. I’d think that meant you wouldn’t need to send a threatening ask, Lindsay. There are better ways to deal with substantial proof being presented that you act inappropriately and bully others. The first that comes to mind is apologising.

Oh, I get it. I post proof about your friend stealing a person’s identity, and you think I’m sending you anons? It’s not me. There’s a laundry list of people who have beef with Lindsay. If you don’t understand why people might be upset with her, open your eyes.

#stay out of my inbox with your lies #not interested in people who bully #lie #etc #now we all know why lindsay and cassie/etara are so close #liars #lindsay

Please stop coming onto my blogs and sending me messages about Linds. It's exhausting and upsetting. This isn't my fight, and given that I don't know you and she's been nothing but nice in the few interactions we've had, you and your friends, though I suspect you're just one person with many blogs, coming and trying to convince me on anon is beyond ridiculous. You're being incredibly hateful and I don't want any part in your war. Please leave me alone.

I’m not “coming onto” (sic) your blogs. I haven’t sent you messages. You are the one who helped Lindsay pretend to be Ziya though. lindsayfussell told me about you. You’re here trying to clear your own name, I assume. It’s too late for that. You need to back up and stop acting like it’s not your problem when there is proof you helped Lindsay send anons and pretend to be Z. Imagine how exhausting and upsetting is it for all the people you and Lindsay are hurting by doing what you do. We’re not all one person, but if it helps you sleep at night, I am all right with you thinking that.

#hecalledmeflowers #dream-unlimited #dreamsunlimited #lindsay

There is no “Z”

At least not the Z Lindsay’s leading people to believe is real. Back in May, Lindsay made a couple of posts about being with a friend of hers at his graduation from USFSP. Here’s one of those posts that davinamarshall reblogged:

This post was followed by this selfie with Ziya:

In case you want even more proof that this is a picture of Lindsay and Ziya:

http://crowsneststpete.com/2015/02/16/meet-your-candidates/

https://www.facebook.com/ZiyaKyle

Keep this boy’s face in mind as we move forward to the present. There’s another guy, supposedly, that goes by the name of Z and talks about nothing but Lindsay. Here’s a post from “Z’s” blog, foundasaw, just a month after Lindsay talked about Ziya:

Usually when people say “a little about me”, they tell you about themselves. This “Z”s whole story was about how he met Lindsay. Aren’t they good friends? You’d think so, they went drinking together. Just keep in mind that “Z” claimed he was from Louisiana, met Lindsay again on Facebook in 2010, and somewhere between then and now he’s moved to Florida. Anyway, back to them drinking. Z posted this video of him and Lindsay on August 24th:

https://vt.tumblr.com/tumblr_ntm9mx4xja1ub0pw9.mp4#_=_

Here’s a screencap for anyone that doesn’t want to click:

That’s Ziya. Not “Z”. The only Z on tumblr is Lindsay pretending to be someone else and using his face like he’s some roleplay FC. Look at the video. Lindsay is the one filming it because she’s probably using her own phone. Ziya, the guy in the video, isn’t filming it and yet it was posted to “Z”s tumblr. Lindsay filmed this video and used it to convince people that Z was a real person, without Ziya knowing what she intended to do with the video.

Read what’s written on foundasaw/“Z”s blog. He sounds exactly like Lindsay, and coincidentally everything written there is about Lindsay. No 27 year old man from Louisiana would sound like a 25 year old woman from Florida. He doesn’t roleplay. He hardly posts and when he does, guess what, it’s about Lindsay. There’s so many excuses for him not posting regularly too, ranging from “forgetting” he had a tumblr to going on a sudden holiday for weeks.

Ziya isn’t on tumblr going by the name of Z. There is no 26/27 year old from Louisiana that moved to Florida some time after 2010. Ziya’s lived in Florida his whole life. He started college, in Florida, in 2009. He’s not from Louisiana. He graduated from university this year, in Florida, and he’s the same age as Lindsay. The real Z, Ziya, definitely is not the one that’s been posting on foundasaw. Lindsay based her made up Z on a real person she went to USFSP with, and has been pretending to be him this whole time.

#facts can't be ignored #lindsay

September 21st 2015, 12:59:50 am #cheers

So...the person who was jumping everyone for using Luke Mitchell as a face claim and smutting...is using a real person’s face, a person she knows, to pretend she is someone else?

Yeah, that’s not shady, shitty and shifty at all. /sarcasm

Moral of the Story: Choose your friends wisely.

lindsayfussellisabully

I’m about to get into a very personal account of the things Lindsay has done to me and then after word, Lindsay, there’s a whole menagerie of evidence and personal accounts piled up against you so have fun refuting that.

Lindsay. You have bullied me nearly a year. NEARLY A YEAR I HAVE PUT UP WITH YOUR MANIPULATION AND YOUR ABUSE. It’s hilarious to me you’re claiming these things never happened or that you’ve “stopped”. You haven’t. I’m proof of that. Other people are proof of that. And there is so many things that you have done that are UNFORGIVABLE. You are unforgivable.

I can’t go into specifics because I know you’d figure out who I was and it would just cause me more hate. We started roleplaying on your shitty self insert blog, spellcreator. You forced ships onto me, you told me who to roleplay with and you got angry with me when I roleplayed with people you didn’t like. You tossed me around and dressed me up like I was your barbie doll and I didn’t have the guts to tell you how uncomfortable it made me.

Then I spoke up about it, said it upset me, and low and behold suddenly I’m being abusive an manipulative!! I merely messaged you in private discussing how you were making me feel and asking that you please stop policing who I roleplay with and you pitched a fit. It’s always your way or the high way and you made that known and CONTINUE TO in the inbox of my now abandoned blog because I’m SUCH A BULLY for simply messaging you with something that made me uncomfortable.

You made the issue public.

You dragged my name around and didn’t care about the hate I was getting as a result, in fact I think you WANTED me to get hate. You played the victim, you made it sound like I was HORRIBLE to you and I didn’t understand because all I did was message you asking that you stopped policing who I roleplayed with.

Then months later you come to me trying to apologize… This was recently. I wonder if you remember exactly what you said to me because it was the most pathetic apology I’ve ever heard and you STILL made yourself out to be the victim.

All I said in response was that I didn’t accept your apology and that you please stop contacting me.

What happened instead? You messaged me repeatedly, you went off on me, you yelled at me for being such a bully and for not accepting your apology because I was really the one in the wrong. You were RELENTLESS. I got anons to. Whether they were from you or your followers, who fucking knows? It’s no secret you talk shit about me behind my back. Your so-called “friends” have told me about the things you’ve said about me.

I tried to block you. Incidentally however blocking wasn’t working very well because of a recent shitty tumblr update. I tried everything I could. I even told you that I was trying to block you and you said you didn’t care. It would block you for a few seconds and then it would unblock you and the whole time you kept fucking messaging me until I left that account. I abandoned that account. I haven’t logged on since.

Later, however, I messaged burnbooking asking if they knew anything because I thought they were fairly reasonable and maybe knew what the issue was.

They didn’t. But guess who was quick to chime in, Lindsay? YOU.

You chimed in, like you fucking KNEW it was me and I felt like vomitting the second I saw your url. I couldn’t believe it. I couldn’t fucking believe it. I felt sick, I felt scared. I didn’t know what to do.

But then I saw my friend respond to the post with a solution, a solution, that THANK GOD, worked. I blocked you on my then active account, not the one that you had been messaging me on, but another one. I messaged my friend to thank them, I know how you frequent those call out blogs so much so you probably recognize this story and have seen the cap featured above.

I’m the friend. I’ve been friends with the person I messaged for almost as long as I’ve known Lindsay. She’s the only person, until now, that I’ve talked to about the things Lindsay said and did to me. She was actually the person who helped make me aware of the fact what Lindsay was doing was manipulative.

Not much has happened other than that other than some vague posts I’ve seen Lindsay make about me and this recent post about her feeling suicidal.

That’s honestly kind of hilarious to me. The things you did and said to me made me want to hurt myself so much and when I told you that you told ME you didn’t care. It’s funny how you take from the things other people have experienced and then use it to make yourself into the victim. I honestly can’t believe that post at all. I can’t. It’s like the boy who cried wolf. You told me you were going to kill yourself so many times over the STUPIDEST things like ships and who I followed and that I made you want to do those things… SO MANY TIMES that I just CAN’T believe it. I refuse.

And then there’s the fact that you said you could make someone want to kill themselves. FACT. There is absolutely NO excuse for that, I don’t care if it happened once the way you said it did (I don’t believe that either). There is no excuse for that. You do not deserve forgiveness.

Quote: “Fuck Evee. I could make her want to kill herself but James is screaming at me on the phone right now.”

QUOTE: “Fuck Evee. I could make her want to kill herself…”

QUOTE: “I could make her want to kill herself…”

YOU SAID THAT.

And interestingly enough, Evee DID try to kill herself to which you swooped in to play the victim.

Here’s that post.

Here’s a transcript of that post for those that may not want to go to the link:

“anaxpraetor (that’s you Lindsay) said: I’m terrified that the person who pushed you to almost killing yourself was me. Beth mentioned it recently and I am so confused about everything but if it was me, I am so sorry. I’m sorry for fighting with you about Ree. I want to apologize to her too. I don’t expect you to forgive me at all, but I never wanted to see you hurt. I won’t follow you on this blog, I shouldn’t even be sending this message because this should be your safe place. I am truly and sincerely sorry. I wish you nothing but the best”

“You know what, I went over this for HOURS about what to say. So I am publishing this so it’s known and because I want it as public record in case you try to change what I say.I knew eventually you were going to message me as soon as Beth told you that you’re the reason I tried to kill myself some months ago. And you know what? Beth was right. You are the reason I tried to kill myself. The fact you have the balls to message me and lie to my screen about you not wanting me to hurt infuriates me to no end because of the fact it is a lie.You’ll probably tell yourself that you don’t know what you did but you do know you just don’t want to admit to yourself about what you did because then you have to face the music about being as bad as people say that you are. Let me just list how you aided in my suicide attempt:You went and in private chats bitched about me talking and wishing I would just shut up. Even when I tried to change the chat so it wasn’t just two or three people doing all the talking. After I called you out and told you to stop attacking my friend James went after me. Your friend while he was on the phone with you. That may be on James but you did nothing to stop him. If I remember right, you screamed at him for talking to me. He mentioned that in one of the messages.

After the events that included Ree you privately told people not to roleplay with me because I “attacked and bullied” you. And yeah people came to me and told me that you said that to them. That you told them it was me or you. After inthetournamentgv died and was remade by Beth you told her that if I was in it you would not be and bullied your way into me being deleted from the verse. You told another that agreed I shouldn’t be removed from it that I deserved it because you didn’t like me. Which by the way, that whole verse was written by me, the graphics were done by me. I spent six hours writing that verse that you decided I could not join to the point Beth and I got into a fight and I yelled at her not to use my stuff because of you.

Anons attacked my inbox for days after I told you to leave Ree alone. All about you and how dare I hurt you. When I stood up against you for attacking my friend.

YOU called me a bitch and a bully when I tried to apologize for how rude I was. You called me a hypocrite who thrived off drama and inserted myself where I wasn’t needed. Because I stood up for my friend that you were attacking.

You bullied my friends into dropping things with me and not talking to me.

You told others, people I didn’t even know that I was attacking you and made me the bad guy even though I only stood up for my friend.

You blamed me in private to others about the verse dying and said I was toxic and killing it and I was the reason people left when several others left because they felt like they couldn’t do anything without making you angry.

It took you not that long to make me feel like I couldn’t touch my blog because if I did you and your anons would be in my inbox attacking me and making me cry. My own blog gave me panic attacks and anxiety because of the things you did above. And yes, I have been talking to Beth and she had asked me before she even told you that you are the reason I tried to kill myself if it was okay to tell you. I told her fine because you deserved to know. I have told five people because two of which were talking to me when I swallowed the pills. Another two I told a month after it. The last person I told last night because she asked why I felt the need to move Asher and what happened.

You say that you never knew and why would you? Why would I tell you after what you did to me that you are the reason I tried to kill myself? Why when you went and told others it was fake and it was to attack you? We’re not friends, we never were and never will be. You’re right you should not expect forgiveness from me because you do not deserve it. You don’t deserve my forgiveness after doing all that and then trying to blame Beth instead for me attempting suicide. Yes, I know you tried to make Beth feel bad and blame her, she showed me the messages. I know that you have bullied my friends on tumblr, on skype, wherever. Somebody who cannot take responsibility for their actions or even acknowledge what they’ve done doesn’t deserve my forgiveness. And yeah its me holding a grudge mostly but I have every right to hold this grudge after how I have been treated. How you have treated my friends.

I believe with every fiber in my being you are as toxic as you tried to claim me to be in the past. As much as I dislike you for what you put me through, for what you did to me and my friends. How you bullied and attacked my friends I would never do what you did. I would never tell people to choose myself or you, nor would I ever tell somebody not to roleplay with you. But you had the audacity to do that to me and to continue to bully my friends.

So no, I don’t forgive you. I don’t think that I ever will. Not unless the gods themselves tell me that forgiving you is the key to immortality and even then I will not. Because what you did to me pushed me to that point I had not been in four years for the pills and three years for wanting to kill myself. I can’t forgive you and I will not forgive you. That may come off harsh and childish but that is how I feel after the torment you put me through and the torment that you put my friends through still.”

That should say it all. But you can’t get it through your thick fucking skull that these things are REAL and they had REAL consequences on people.

Let’s look into some more stuff ft. you, the mother of??? Well you’re the mother of SOMETHING but it’s not the mother of a fandom or of dragons, more like the holy mother of DRAMA.

You’re a drama monger. You’re a manipulative, mentally disturbed drama monger and you leave a trail of destruction wherever you go.

Some nice victim blaming I see going on. You targeted allison-scags-rp and treated them like SHIT when you could’ve just left it be. Then you posted their url, made the issue private and practically BEGGED people to send her hate all the while playing it off like YOU were the victim.

Let’s quote you here “I don’t give a shit if someone sends her hate at this point. I really don’t.”

That’s very telling Lindsay.

But you know, you’re a history major. And what history major is complete without a healthy dose of anti-antisemitism?

Let’s quote you here “angst holocaust”. Absolutely not an appropriate use of the word holocaust. Did you know that a large portion of my family are holocaust survivors? And here you are… Using a gif of the wife of Moses in the film “Prince of Egypt”… This just looks really fucking bad on you. Kind of disgusting.

But let’s get into the recent stuff… That’s in the past right? You don’t do this to people anymore, RIGHT?

Wrong.

Someone tried to come out about how abusive you are and to help victims of your abuse know they’re not alone. And what did you do? You circumvented the ignore feature to send them THREE MESSAGES.

So these are all things that happened in the past, yet you’re actively sending people that have BLOCKED you messages? You don’t sound very innocent, Lindsay. You’re not innocent AT ALL.

I don’t care about whether or not you’re a mod of burnbooking. If you are, you are. Either way you actively use new blogs and IP bouncers to attack and belittle people that I have blocked you. I have experienced this, the user depicted above has experienced this, my friends have experienced this… It really doesn’t look good for you.

Harassment is not a pretty shade on you.

You claim people are harassing YOU but what most of them are doing is speaking up about you harassing THEM. You continuously play the victim card and spin things to be things they’re not. You pretend that YOU’RE the one being bullied when REALLY you’re the one bullying others…

This was a pretty recent post. Look at you calling this person “literally idiotic”. You think you’re right about everything and you do that by belittling and attacking other people. And you STILL think you’re right about it.

This is someone’s response, I know you know their blog, to someone else about your abuse.

QUOTE: “If blocking, moving and leaving her alone worked, I’d have stuck to doing just that. I understand your point, and believe me here - I tried multiple times. It doesn’t work with her. She finds ways to get at you and whoever you talk to no matter how you hide from her.”

That’s right Lindsay. People actively block you and move blogs and LEAVE the community but you persist and find ways around it and BULLY them. You’re a bully. You’ve hurt a lot of people. This isn’t speculation, this isn’t defamation as you like to claim, it is a fact.

You bully and you manipulate and you HURT people.

I have talked to far too many people who have been HURT and MANIPULATED by you to idly by. I’m one of those people. You probably have an idea of who I am but it doesn’t matter. I’m posting this because I’m sick of your self-victimization when you continue to incur harm against others and make them feel like SHIT.

I’m doing this anonymously because I’m SCARED of what you’d do to me if I did it in the public light. I’m scared to even TALK to people first hand about these issues, scared to the point I had my FRIEND talk to people FOR me. What these people said… what they had to say about you was EXACTLY what I have experienced with you. My friend screencapped the posts for me. I’ll include those in here as my friend ALSO got permission to PUBLISH those screencaps.

Why? Because these people… the MULTIPLE PEOPLE you have abused and continue to abuse WANTED it to be known that you’re an abuser. And so do I. It just took me nearly a YEAR to do this because I was TERRIFIED of what would happen.

I can’t type this post up without fucking CRYING because you consistently HUMILIATED me. I was so fucking HUMILIATED after everything you did to me I had to have someone else talk to people for me. I was scared of coming out about the things you did, I was scared that I’d be made fun of or that somehow you’d find me and I’m STILL scared to talk to these people myself…

But the things they said?? It’s almost EVERYTHING you did to me and the things you put me through.

This is what those people had to say:

This was all just from ONE person you abused. ONE PERSON. This is so much horrible shit. And I went through EXACTLY the same thing.

You bullied me, you made comments about my ED and the fact that I was suicidal. I thought for a time that killing myself would’ve meant people– including you– were better off without me. YOU did NOTHING about that, INSTEAD you made passive aggressive posts about how I should just “get on with it then” DO YOU REMEMBER THAT? Probably not, but I do. I do and I hurt every time I think about it.

Unfortunately for me, you’re the kind of manipulator who DELETES things so people can’t go back and cap them or use them as evidence. You delete things so people don’t have a voice. And I don’t have a voice on so many things because you’ve deleted all the evidence. Then you want to whine and cry about how people spread “LIES” about you with no evidence. Newsflash, Lindsay. THERE IS NO EVIDENCE BECAUSE YOU’RE GOOD AT DELETING IT. Why do you think the lindsayfussell blog came out in the first place? TO DOCUMENT YOUR SHIT SO YOU DON’T DELETE THE EVIDENCE & THEN SAY IT NEVER HAPPENED.

Do you know what kind of manipulation that is? That’s gaslighting. You’re a GASLIGHTER.

gas·lightˈɡaslīt/

verb

gerund or present participle:

gaslighting

manipulate (someone) by psychological means into questioning their own sanity.

You may want to say it doesn’t count, but deleting the evidence and then acting like it never happened, saying TO OUR FACES it NEVER HAPPENED. Is gaslighting.

There was LEGITIMATELY A TIME when I questioned myself because you said something never happened even though it did.

Aldous Huxley once said, “Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.”

The evidences of your abuse, the facts, ALL OF IT does not CEASE TO EXIST because you are ignoring it and pretending it doesn’t exist.

And to any of Lindsay’s “friends” who might be reading this… Just because she has only ever been “nice” to you… DOESN’T MEAN SHE HASN’T ABUSED PEOPLE LIKE ME.

And to any of Lindsay’s “friends” reading this that sent me HATE and anonymous bullshit all the fucking time because of Lindsay. FUCK YOU. You’re all a part of the problem and I’m scared to even LOG ONTO my main account because of it. FUCK. YOU. And fuck Lindsay Fussell. Because she has hurt me to the point I can’t even talk about this and share my identity. I’ve moved blogs so many times, I’ve used so many different names and I’m still TERRIFIED of Lindsay finding me. Because she’s RELENTLESS. And she may be ignorant but she’s not stupid. She knows how to get around the block feature, she knows how to find people, she knows how to play the victim and she KNOWS how to hurt people. That’s exactly why I’m here posting this.

But there’s more.

Someone else talked with my friend about this issue and GOD I thank them so much because they’re the only person I’ve told and they did so much to try and make me feel better about this.

Here’s what they had to say.

I’m assuming this is Beth. And if this is Beth then this is the person you sent THIS message to:

And if this is Beth then THIS is her account of things:

This is the post Beth links to.

Here is a transcript with more links to screencaps (I’ve broken the text up a bit so it’s easier to read):

“I was going to bite my tongue. I was going to be the bigger person in this situation and just let it self die out but due to this morning’s events that went down through text messages at 7am(my time), that caused me to reach a point that my body was physically and uncontrollably shaking and that for a split second, before I got in contact with Evie, I questioned picking up a razor for the first time in a long time. Now this isn’t new. Well, it is for tumblr, since I haven’t made a single post on this account(Or any account.) about current events that surround drama that has been happening in private, which in all honesty, that is where it should have stayed. Certain conversations should have stayed private, on both parties.

However, you do things when you’re angry that you’re going to regret. I’ll admit to my mistakes and I will also be the first person to tell you, that skype conversations that were posted today by Linds, early this morning in attempt to ‘cover her own ass’, had already been discussed with the people that they have mentioned. Now since this was literally just about what went down with Evie, that’s what I’m going to keep this as(we’ll see how that goes.). However, with that being said, if you desire to contact me about anything, please message me off anon and we can discuss it in private and I will personally apologize for anything and everything that I’ve done.

Getting back to the main frame of this post, I’m sure you all know who I’m speaking of when I say the name Linds and I will admit, that her and I were friends for quite some time. A long time, actually. Not as long as a year though. A few months ago there was a group verse going on that she was involved in with myself and Evie. It had died out after we held an event and a fight happened between Linds, Ree and Evie. At the time, I was extremely angry at Evie and we had blew up on each other. I couldn’t see how far up Linds I was back then but thanks to certain people(yes that includes stalking posts on davinamarshall about her)that I was so very wrong. I was wrong in who I thought she was.

Hell, I wouldn’t even listen to my best friend of fourteen years about Linds mainly because I have a habit of giving people the benefit of the doubt when they don’t deserve it. I allow people to push me around because I’d rather bite my tongue than say anything against it and I allowed for her to mentally abuse me for months when I should not have for my own sanity. However, I was afraid of going against her. Mainly because the last time I did, she handed me my head on a silver platter simply because I made a mistake on zero sleep saying that Great Britain celebrates Thanksgiving, which, ironically enough, the comment was made in a post for a HP verse and I was extremely tired(and since this post is going to get long, I’ll provide links to screencaps I’ve taken from Skype: here andhere.)

I do know that she says that she doesn’t send anon hate, and I, myself, can no longer show the messages that she sent my good friend in The 100 fandom, because she had removed the file before I could go back and save it, as you can see here. My good friend also does state in our skype log that it wasn’t just one ask that Linds sent her, it was three. Three asks that made her feel completely uncomfortable: here. Linds has also gone off on me just for simply adding people from The 100 fandom into the group verse she happened to be a part of. Those messages can be found here, here, here, and here. And then continued on to go off on me because I have a muse in that fandom, however, that muse was no only made because I wished to play him, but also as an account I could escape from her on.

She also says that I didn’t tell her because of her hatred for the show, when in reality, I did not tell her for three reasons:

One- I knew how she would react.

Two - I do not have to tell her every single muse that I create and their account.

Three - As stated above, he was my account that I could escape her from.

At this point, I started to realize just how toxic she was. I had read posts about her from boilandtoil and davinamarshall and the wheels in my head started to turn and connect pieces. This is the continuation of the conversation when she learn of my muse: here, here, here, here, here, here, here, and here.

Getting back to what went down with Evie, Ree and Linds, I was in the wrong. I inserted myself into a situation that I should not have done. I showed conversations that should have stayed between Evie and myself, however, I did not. And in all honesty, about a week or two after it had gone down, Evie and I had discussed everything that went down. I had admitted to my mistake and together we mended our friendship and moved on. However, since those posts were made known in an attempt to try and turn this around to make me seem like the bad guy,

I’m going post the screencaps I took of them, including why there was a gap between messages: here, here, here, here, here, and here.

You see, Linds constantly asks for proof on things she’s done to people but it’s almost vertually impossible to get that proof since she is constantly deleting her blogs that it is on or deleting the asks she sends. My good friend, the one that is stated above, deleted the asks because this is suppose to be her safe place and she no longer desired those messages in her inbox. Things have gone down in private neatchat messages as well, which of course, neither I, nor Evie have proof of because at them time, we didn’t see the need in screencapping it as proof for something but in those neatchats, that is one of the places where Linds privately messaged one of our friends tell her not to RP with Evie.

She preaches so much about how tumblr is suppose to be this safe spot for people, yet she does not make it so. If this was suppose to be a safe place for someone, then why would she publicly call me out? Why would she post those messages only to turn around and delete them hours later(however there is still proof that they are up, thanks to an anon on a different account for letting me know.)? I am making this post with included screencaps to show you all what type of person she can become once you actually go against her. I was so blind in the beginning of our friendship. I actually stood up for her many times and calmed her down on Skype. I also tried multiple times to talk her out of deleting her accounts.(You can find those here, here, here, and here.)

But after I learned things and opened my eyes, I realized the type of person she truly was. I pulled myself away for awhile. I spent time on my The 100 account and eventually I got to the point I had bottled everything, and I do mean, everything, not just things with her but things in real life, up for for far too long and I made a post under a read more(which I deleted a few days ago upon Linds’ request because I was stupid and danced with the idea of mending our breaking friendship)and she claims that it was about her, however, my rant was about many things that did not include her. I do have a personal life, I have family I spend time with and also friends. My world does not revolve around her. My rants are not directed at her.

It started off as one thing and blew up into another but none of it was about her. Yet, this is what happens when I decide to reblog a single graphic post from boilandtoil, whom I follow on another account, and from that simple reblog, it was like World War III attacked me and I had finally just imploded. You can find those caps here, here, here, here, here,here, here, here, and here. But honestly, Skype is not the only place she attacked me at.

She attacked me through TEXT messages. Of all things.

She talks about keeping safe places, well, don’t you think texting on a personal phone should be labeled a safe place not just tumblr? I took caps of those too, which lead to me being sick today and uncontrollable shaking. Those can be found here: here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, and here.

So in closing, I am not posting this for you lot to send her hate, I’m posting it to get all the truth out there from my point of view, to let you all know what happened. I’m posting this to, I guess, thank davinamarshall and boilandtoil for opening my eyes to seeing who she really is. And I’m posting this because I’m hurt and I’m so done with her playing the innocent victim card.”

So there you go Linds. There are the facts, there is the evidence. There’s so much more you’ve said and done but as many others and I have pointed out YOU DELETE THINGS. You delete things, you block people, you cut ties so that the evidence either gets BURIED or is completely erased.

And I wish I could say that it helped me knowing that I’m not alone but it DOESN’T.

It doesn’t because people still WORSHIP the ground you walk on and act like your shit doesn’t stink and it KILLS me that people still invalidate me, that I still log on to anonymous messages I’m assuming are from YOU and your shitty followers.

I don’t care anymore. I can’t say this without being anonymous because I know what you’d do, I know what your followers would do, and I’m smart enough to preserve myself.

My friend and I have talked a lot about the issue and both of us suspect you’re either a mod of burnbooking or a friend of a mod. This is now just our own speculation. It’s obvious. You either know them or you are them. That’s the bottom line. Your pattern in follows and your pattern in EVERYTHING shows. You use those blogs the way you’ve used those blogs in the past, to pretend you’re not Linsday Fussell so you can continue to contact people that have blocked you like what you did on indiegossipism or what the fuck ever that shitty blog was. And NO I haven’t forgotten about the time you MISGENDERED A TRANS CHARACTER CALLING THEM AN “IT” either.

You’re ignorant, abusive, scum and I’m making this post to break my silence on the matter and because I want other people to know the things that you’ve done.

I know most people won’t listen. People love you, they adore you, even though you’re the QUEEN of mistreatment.

But at least I’ve said my peace.

I am not coming back to tumblr roleplay. This is a fact. I’m done feeling scared, I’m done feeling bullied, I’m done feeling cornered and abused and THREATENED. I’m done dealing with Lindsay Fussell and her abuse and her manipulation and how she treats me and other people and I’m done with the Lindsay’s loyal fucking friends who eat up everything she says and HURT ME just as Linds did because Linds told them to.

I’m just done. I cannot ever feel safe in this community and I want it to be known that that is Lindsay’s fault because I am sick of being PETRIFIED of what Lindsay has done to me. I’m sick of it.

So here you go. Thanks Linsday, hesparks, sparkplvg, spellcreator, spellliason, teleknetic, and whatever other fucking accounts you have that you utilize to hurt people. I know there are many. Thank you, honestly. Without you I wouldn’t have crippling anxiety logging on to almost all of my accounts, I wouldn’t be scared to tag my posts in the rp tags, I wouldn’t be scared to roleplay with one of my best friends because you’ve poisoned her with your nonsense, I wouldn’t be scared to even make this post.

I honestly, from the bottom of my heart, hate you. You’ve taken so many good things from me that I can’t even do the thing I love anymore.

So that’s it. This is my goodbye message from tumblr roleplay. I know not many people will even see this, but I had to post this. I had to say what I needed to say.

#lindsayfussellisabully #lindsay

September 17th 2015, 11:55:30 am #hesparks#doyouknowachristina#lindsayfussell

I’m sorry you went through so much because of Lindsay. I wish you would stay and be able to role play on tumblr. It sickens me to know Lindsay has driven yet another person from tumblr.

I'm sorry if this is weird but I just wanted to say that I am really grateful for this blog. You made my experience on here safer and happier. I hope you're having a good day :)

Same to you. I appreciate the kind words.

I'm sorry to say that I was one of the people suckered into thinking CQ was a great person. Honestly, I've been trying to figure out what's true ever since she deleted her blog, but after reading this blog, I kinda get it now. Is it true that CQ's back under a different character?

Cassie is alive and well on tumblr rp, yes. Maybe burnbooking will share her info with you. Cassie has been sending them fanmails and burnboking likes to witch hunt.

so myself and several friends of mine and mutual friends of my friend lol got the suspicion a certain roleplayer in the 100 fandom was etara, and upon visiting your blog we've found you've touched on this SAME USER being etara, her oc account i think "thiishuman" and it's kind of sketching us all out that we picked up on it so quickly. and also sketching us out that bygoness (my friend who called etara out) played murphy... a character that etara started playing in the 100 fandom. it's so weird.

That user is a 15 year old named Abby. She confirmed her identity. Please don’t bother her.

One of Etara's friends, Firesingedsoul, is really hurting a lot of people to the point where I'm thinking of making a blog like this. I supported her. She made accusations against other people and I held her up and tried to make her feel better. Then she posted that she was leaving tumblr for good. I was sad, but she was adamant. Now surprise, she's back. She uses people to make her feel better/tries to make people look bad.I fucking hate it and it's not fair with what she does to other people.

I’m sorry for whatever you went through with that person. If you want to talk about it, we can. No judgments. But for right now, I don’t know that tumblr user or any of their history. I prefer proof.

I'm sorry but for burnbooking, and lindsay being one of the mods. Her fucking burn is the only one "blurred out" and untagged. And they said they were going to do things like that now. They haven't at all. Lindsay is clearly a mod who is lying and covering up her own tracks. Sooo full of shit there Lindsay.

You’re not the only one to notice that about her or her burn. They conveniently posted a burn after me and others pointed out none were being posted about her, and it was “blurred” while others were left un-blurred and tagged for all to see.

If that isn’t suspicious, I don’t know what is.

September 11th 2015, 8:01:31 am #info#anonymous

There's a theme credit on burnbooking's blog.

Yes, davinamarshall had a theme credit too. I’m not sure what your point is. I think constantlyquibbling’s point is that no one else has been using that theme. burnbooking/Lindsay went out of her way to track down the same theme davinamarshall used.

September 11th 2015, 7:55:09 am #info#anonymous