“Depression is like having an abusive relationship with yourself.”
— Unknown
.....you know what.....sometimes, fuck Tumblr.
Jules of Nature
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if i look back, i am lost

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@coolfnfarmy
“Depression is like having an abusive relationship with yourself.”
— Unknown
.....you know what.....sometimes, fuck Tumblr.
I hate that bugs don’t take fall damage
How I knock a spider off the ceiling and that shit hit the ground and start running
Lmao
Goodbye.
One of my favs songs of all time, "Dear Mama," by 2pac, does not feel the same. That song used to tug on my heart strings until the tears fell. Lately, there are no tears to fall. When it comes to my biological parents, I've had to cut them off. Put distance between us. That hurt. However, I have reached my limit. I can't take the emotional turmoil anymore. I feel numb on the inside. There's no feeling there. Sometimes I would put that song on, and find the release that I desperately needed. The last couple days, no release. My body has shut off my emotions. The last straw came with the most recent domestic violence dispute. I can't anymore. I can't go through that again. I've been surrounded by a vortex of violence my entire life. No more. Goodbye.
I'm still angry about
Tamir Rice, 12 Trayvon Martin, 17 Mike Brown, 18 Akai Gurley, 28 Ezell Ford, 25 John Crawford III, 22 Eric Garner, 43, Yvette Smith, 47 Jordan Baker, 26 Jonathan Ferrell, 24 Larry Eugene Jackson, Jr., 32 Dontre Hamilton , 37 Dante Parker, 36 Tanisha Anderson ,37 Jerame Reid, 36 Tony Robinson, 19 Phillip White,32 Walter Scott,50 Freddie Gray, 25 Sandra Bland, 28 AND YOU SHOULD BE TOO.
What if Series… Which series would you watch?
Ig @AshleighSharmaine
Art inquiry [email protected]
#ashleighsharmaine #yoashisdope #ForTheCulture #art #blackart
I need to see more of this
I’d watch all of them
A Tribe Called Quest
On excessive worrying about exams
(I received an email yesterday and based on that email, I am writing this post.) This is the most important advice I would like to give medical students world wide. Or anyone for that matter - Don’t take exams seriously. Once exams start, you can not be stressing yourself.It’s a fragile period, you are testing yourself, there is competition and expectations that you have to meet. It’s easy for anyone who isn’t psychologically prepared or doesn’t have the right mental attitude to break down. I have heard of people become suicidal right before the exam or simply decide to quit. Don’t let stress kill you. It’s just a piece of paper. The score is just a number. You have amazing, amazing things and adventures ahead of you, I promise. Just survive this. One day at a time. Don’t quit before trying. Just attempt and see what happens. Go ahead. Keep going, keep moving forward. You are more prepared than you think you are. It’s just the stress fogging your thoughts. I pretend it’s video game. The test is just a level I need to cross by collecting points. I need to keep running like the dude in Temple Run and keep collecting coins. Going level after level just like in Candy Crush. I have given so many exams and crossed so many levels till date. Here’s another one, no big deal. I don’t need a high score to finish the game, I just need to play the game. Practice reckless optimism. After reading one page, I do a flying kick and say I am gonna do so good in tomorrow’s test. Laugh about how anxious you are and how the score won’t even matter after 10 years. Sing a song. Eat chocolate. Be happy and keep studying. Fake it till you make it. Antidote for common negative thoughts during exams - My life depends on this, it’s too important: No, it doesn’t. I think of successful people who didn’t do well in exams. It alleviates my anxiety. I could have studied better: Yes, we could have always done better. That’s what makes us human, having the possibility for improvement. Doing things better. It’s okay to feel that way, it’s not okay to drown in regret. I am stupid: You’re not. You’re a medical student and you are very smart. Don’t you dare call yourself stupid based on one bad exam. I made too many silly mistakes: Learn from them, write them down. Do not repeat them in the next exam. That’s all you can do. I am gonna fail in tomorrow’s test: We’ll see what happens after the results come out. You don’t get to decide this before giving the exam. Today’s test was horrible, I am not gonna make it: We’ll see what happens after the results come out. You don’t get to depress yourself over it today. You need to prepare yourself for the next exam. I have so much too review and there’s so much syllabus pending: Yes, of course. It’s okay. There’s an ocean of knowledge out there and you can’t know everything. Stop thinking so much. Just keep studying. I wish I could say these words to the people who quit when they needed to hear it. I hope this helps you in some way. Come back to this page when you are stressed and send it to someone who needs to hear these words. Pat yourself for making it so far. Appreciate yourself for holding it together, no matter how bad things got. And be very proud of yourself for surviving this. I love you. Stay strong. You are awesome.
Don’t look for peace. Don’t look for any other state than the one you are in now; otherwise, you will set up inner conflict and unconscious resistance. Forgive yourself for not being at peace. The moment you completely accept your non-peace, your non-peace becomes transmuted into peace. Anything you accept fully will get you there, will take you into peace. This is the miracle of surrender
Eckhart Tolle (via purplebuddhaproject)
The Panthers used to ride around and follow the police.
So the cops would pull over some sorry black person, and get ready to rough him up, but then there were the Panthers right behind them. Watching, armed to the teeth, and citing legal statutes. It’s inspirational.
Bring it back.
Bring this back.
For real.
That’s why the FBI broke them up, isn’t it ?
That among other community initiatives. They had weapons training, self defense, their free breakfast program and ran a newspaper. They raised money to pay for bail and legal funding for people. And they used to notify the community of their rights and encourage people to know the laws and protest the one which were unjust. That type of shit irked the local police and damned sure struck a nerve with the FBI. They were taking back the streets and providing the protection the police were never interested in bringing to their neighborhoods from the very start. So it’s always fuck the FBI for me.
Also let’s be starkly clear about this: under COINTELPRO the FBI raided the homes of Black Panthers and outright murdered them. They conspired with local police forces to harass, assault, and concoct false evidence against anybody affiliated with the BPP. And they didn’t keep their operations confined to the black community directly. When a white woman working in civil rights was killed by the KKK (they were aiming at her black passenger) the FBI excused the KKK by claiming that she was a communist and slept with black men. They refused to accept the reports of white agents who said that the BPP were no threat and demanded that the agents falsify information to paint the BPP as violent domestic terrorists. The FBI was determined to quash revolutionary black movements that were chiefly devoted to community protection and development and they stopped at nothing in their attempts to reach this goal.
One thing we don’t talk about even in our own retellings and reclaimings of BPP history is that a large part of the reason the government worked to break them up wasn’t because of armed action, but because they provided so many necessary social services and programs: free breakfast for children, walking the elderly to and from banks safely to cash their social security checks, free medical centers, door-to-door sickle cell testing, blood drives, raising money for bail, clothing donations, legal aide, busing people to and from prisons to visit, commissary for prisoners. Not only did they fight back against state violence in their confrontations with police, but also by resisting the forced conditions of poverty, criminality and scarcity created by the state to further destroy their communities. J. Edgar Hoover genuinely wrote in an FBI memo that:
“The Breakfast for Children Program B represents the best and most influential activity going for the BPP and, as such, is potentially the greatest threat to efforts by authorities B to neutralize the BPP and destroy what it stands for.”
When I need a good example of the antiblackness that is fundamental to this country’s history and how it persists even now, I remember that the BPP were viewed as a threat to national security, not because they were armed, but because they wouldn’t allow black children to die from starvation and malnutrition.
Let’s bring it tf back
Men can have daddy issues too.
You going through it I know. You’re growing and tryna make sense of it all. Don’t forget to take it easy on yourself. I know this process is tough. Keep pushing. Wishing you much love and success.
(via a-beautiful-queen)