𝔠𝔬𝔯𝔞𝔡𝔞𝔪𝔞𝔫𝔱𝔦𝔰
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edward elric rp blog. 18+. mutual excl.
Keni

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Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

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Claire Keane
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
RMH
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occasionally subtle

#extradirty

izzy's playlists!
Sade Olutola
Misplaced Lens Cap
trying on a metaphor
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@coradamantis
𝔠𝔬𝔯𝔞𝔡𝔞𝔪𝔞𝔫𝔱𝔦𝔰
ask - rules - about
edward elric rp blog. 18+. mutual excl.
𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕄𝕒𝕘𝕟𝕦𝕤 ℙ𝕣𝕠𝕥𝕠𝕔𝕠𝕝 (𝕖𝕡. 𝟙-𝟙𝟞) (stupid vers)
a collection of stupid quotes from episode 1-16 of The Magnus Protocol that make it sounds like an office comedy instead of a horror podcast, use as you wish, adjust as needed
It is a privilege and an honour to be horrible in your ears once again.
I care. Not a lot, mind. Don’t flatter yourself.
It’s okay, [Name]; We’re figuring it out, cutie.
Don’t hit on the computer while I’m working on it.
Let me guess- fancy gowns, champagne, bathing in the blood of the poor- that sort of thing?
I'm the patron saint of cute wimps.
It's a good place to canoodle.
That’s cool. Babies are cool.
No one in this entire place will give me a single ounce of respect.
That nearly went very badly.
I'm breaking the boundaries of what it means to dance.
You can be creeped out or sarcastic but not both.
Nice chair. I could look real ominous swiveling in that thing.
Don’t be gross.
Some of us do actual work here. At our job. Which pays us.
Dark love to all my creepy sweeties!
I'm mysterious~
God bless Bitcoin, amiright?
I should probably stop getting tattoos of your face and return all your kidnapped pets.
Thanks, [name]. Utterly useless as always.
Treason's “bussin'” and “fire”, but it won't look good on your CV.
I thought you were a goth?
Your girl is goth- not a ghoul.
Welcome to my twisted mind.
game changer sentence starters
s7e2 "you-lympics"
hollywood is, for the moment, not on strike.
really proud of yourself, huh?
___'s moving in!
no, ___, we did that. we did that already.
[like a huge nerd] um, ACTUALLY--
ONCE AGAIN, ___ HAS FOUND A NOVEL WAY TO PUNISH YOU FOR DOING YOUR BEST. THE MAN IS SICK! HE'S A SICK, SICK MAN!
i hurt my stomach a little bit.
this is cool, where can i get one of these?
i've been waiting for a physical challenge.
have you been in the same clothes since friday?
would that be weird if that was true?
this is just another day for me. every day i'm beating myself. beating myself OFF!
you can't say "i suck" after i say you did better than me!
let's just hope she doesn't psych herself out. let's hope she doesn't choke. she looks beautiful, but i don't think she'll do a good job.
this is like gym class for me. the same anxiety.
oh, this one hurt. but that's alright! that's not a complaint.
these hurt! but in a fun way.
you're looking like a bunch of low-budget "hellraiser" halloween costumes.
very interesting to start with the mouth. one of the most painful places. it seems like maybe that's what you would save for last.
no points for you.
[putting a lot of italian accent flair on it] spaghetti 🤌
go ahead, look it up.
wooooooooooow.
i'm sorry i said risotto was pasta. i fucked up.
did you study?
hey, li'l sweet muffin! hey li'l muff! where you GOING--
dude, i'm just rubbing a little bit of bacon on my fingers, man.
that is so fucking devious.
history will remember me as the man who shoved a sandwich down his pants!
i gotta get this out of my crotch.
how's it going? how's it going, buddy?
what is it about big men and little cats?
how many points do you get for integrity?
i don't know what you're talking about, this looks very legally distinct to me.
[standing face-first against the wall in shame]
this is my literal nightmare.
that's gonna haunt me for a while.
i left ashamed!
for future reference, you can give me a heads-up if you can see my nipples or not.
this is indistinguishable from a saw trap.
leave that cheese alone!
thought that was hard? this will be worse.
[stares into the middle distance and rethinks all the choices that led us here]
interesting psychological experiment.
i have never felt less comedic in my life.
i love you, ___.
all i gotta do is focus up, lock in, and tear it up.
I JUST HAVE TO LOCK IN! I JUST HAVE TO LOCK IN!
just start swangin' it.
when you put sandwiches in your pants, you make peace with getting crabs.
let's see who can eat the most parmesan cheese! again!
🎶 when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's amore 🎶
[unenthusiastically] oh my goodness. i love it.
i'm covered in cheese head to toe.
that is psychotic.
in the end, you're only competing with yourself. that rat bastard.
𝐆𝐀𝐌𝐄 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒
a collection of sentence starters from dropout tv's game changer. feel free to alter pronouns/text as you see fit
“I’ve been here THE WHOLE TIME”
“It’s hard to hold this much anger in my body.”
“If you never hear from me again, you know what to do!.”
“If they don’t find me it’s because I was chopped up and fed to the pigs!”
“I SOLVED YOUR LABYRINTH, PUZZLEMASTER. THE MINOTAUR’S ESCAPED, AND YOU’RE GONNA GET THE HORNS, BUDDY”
“I. CANNOT. WIN!!!!”
“A lot of people have been saying that ___ is a singularly evil, wildly incompetent, befuddled nepo baby silver spoon motherfucker. This is what people are saying.”
“If you can do ONE swing on the swing I will let you play with all the math puzzles that you want”
“You’re not getting a FUCKING JOKE OUT OF ME until you let me out of this room! You want bits?! You let me out of this room for bits, motherfucker!”
“Are we gonna die before we get outta here?”
“I’m gonna lose so fucking hard it’s gonna blow your fucking mind”
“But in this sick rodeo, this bizarre fucked up clown festival, we’re here celebrating what I can only describe as the sickness at the core of America.”
“Give me the assignment and I don’t miss. I’m gonna DIE before this is over.”
“Your tower’s gonna fall. Laugh it up now.”
“A river of sweat is running down my back right now.”
“I do hate zombies and I will have nightmares about this tonight. But in this moment I just feel like I’m surrounded by friends.”
“We don’t give a cum.”
“If you’re in a hole, DYING. I WON’T BE THERE.”
“I showed them my feet, [name]! I SHOWED THEM MY FEET FOR NOTHING?”
“Stop shaking your cock in the middle of a fucking huddle, dude!”
“I’d fuck that pie.”
“If you’re like me, you eat a lot of ass.”
“I hate capitalism but I also hate losing.”
“I get my tongue so far up somebody it’s like I’m tasting their tonsils. I get so deep in there I’m gonna burn myself with stomach acid.”
“I like perching like a little bisexual gargoyle”
“If you were performing on a subway I would take money away from you.”
“I’VE ONLY JUST BEGUN TO PULL THE THREAD ON THIS SWEATER.”
“Icarus flying too close to the sun, but it seems Daedalus our little mastercrafter over here had some WAX WINGS OF HIS OWN, didn’t he? Wanted to see his son fall, faaaalll from the sky, OH HOW CLOSE TO THE SUN HE FLEW”
“Hey can I get an ah? … Don’t scream at me.”
“You kinda have the vibe that your kids call you by your first name.”
“The day I DON’T curse when a body falls from the sky, call somebody.”
“Could I place an order? I’m hungie. What do you think would be the best pizza to order if I’m quite hungie? Um, I like cheese, what is your largest pizza? Yeah let’s get an extra large because I’m hungie. I’m hungie, I’m hungie, I’m hungie.”
“WE ARE NOT ANIMALS!!!”
“So long as I am on this stage and drawing breath, you can good and goddamn believe I’ll be trying my best in every challenge.”
“Was it bad that we just started smashing shit?”
“You didn't count on INGENUITY did you motherfucker?!”
“FIGHT THE BOURGEOISIE. I WILL VENMO YOU $20.”
“This could be hell. This is very Satre-esque.”
“YOU ARE NOT GOD. THE MACHINE IS GOD.”
“Can you tell us why you’d do this to us?”
“I won’t be made a fool”
“I do feel like I’m in a nightmare”
“I’m the only one OUT of the loop it seems”
“Everybody do the wenis! The wenis is a dance! Everybody is a genius! Who knows it in advance!”
"DANCE IS A SIN!"
"You think I'm gonna fucking roll over?!"
"It'll be a COLD DAY IN HELL when I go out like a fucking chump!"
"I don't care about winning, I just don't wanna lose"
excellent names on the enemy team tonight
"STOP PUTTING YOURSELF INTO DANGER!" PROMPTS * assorted dialogue for expressing your fear that the person you care about might get themselves hurt if they keep acting like this, adjust as necessary
i thought i told you to stay back.
i love you too much to let you get hurt like this.
this affects me, too, you know.
every time you leave, i sit up all night waiting, praying you'll come back alive.
you keep pulling stunts like this and something bad will happen.
do you have a death wish or something?
this isn't fair to me.
i deserve better than this.
i didn't get any sleep last night because i was so worried about you.
you promised me you'd stop going out at night.
i don't like hearing this.
you've been risking your life, and for what? so you can feel like a goddamn hero?
i said i would handle it.
what the fuck are you doing here?
you told me you'd stay put.
so much for laying low.
you remember how bad it was last time.
seems like you haven't learned anything.
i believe you promised me you'd lay low.
i can't keep doing this.
don't give me that look.
we'll discuss this later.
this stops now.
i'm tired of picking up the pieces once you've left.
you keep throwing yourself into danger.
you don't give a shit about yourself, do you?
i'm sitting here, worried out of my mind, while you're out doing god knows what.
that was really stupid of you, and you know it.
i thought you knew better than this.
what's your excuse this time?
you do realize what this does to me, right? seeing you get hurt like this? you know it hurts me, too?
you really don't give a shit how this affects me, huh.
that was the dumbest possible thing you could have done.
i need you to stop throwing yourself into harm's way.
that was completely unnecessary.
they had it handled.
you didn't need to step in like that.
why do you think you're invincible?
the last time you pulled a stunt like this, it nearly got you killed.
i can't just sit here and watch you get hurt.
what are you trying to prove?
you just like fucking with my heart, don't you.
this shit hurts me, too, you know.
you're not the only one affected by this shit.
you've got a lot of people counting on you to come home every night.
what happens if you don't come back?
you think we can just carry on without you?
you think i can handle things if you end up dead?
i'm not sticking around to watch you get hurt.
you're not even slick.
you think you're invincible, don't you.
quit pretending you've got everything under control.
let someone else do it for a change.
you can't keep putting yourself through shit like this and expect me to just sit back and watch.
i'm done with this.
next time you do this, i'm not coming back.
promise me this is the end.
look me in the eyes and tell me you'll stop doing this.
let the authorities deal with it.
you're making a big mistake.
is it worth dying for?
i've dealt with enough pain over the years.
` * 𝐧𝐨𝐧-𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐛𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 : 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘢 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘵 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘮𝘺 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘴. 𝘯𝘰 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘴 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘦𝘥, 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘰𝘶𝘤𝘩. 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘥 (+ 𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘦) 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘺 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘰𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘥𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘦.
𝐠𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐭 -
01. avoids eye contact or looking at the floor. 02. wringing hands together in silence. 03. fidgeting with the hem of their shirt, unable to stay still. 04. looking at receiver in long silence before looking away. 05. silently leaves a folded note on the table in front of the other. 06. touches the others arm but pulls back out of guilt.
𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫 -
01. slams fist onto a table without saying a word. 02. exhaling sharply through their nose and clenching their jaw. 03. throws an object across the room. 04. crossing their arms tightly, digging fingers into their own skin. 05. pacing the room with heavy steps. 06. glares at the other with a clenched fist.
𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 -
01. gently pushing stray hair behind the others ear. 02. resting their forehead against the others. 03. cups the others face with both hands. 04. pressing a kiss to the others forehead in silence. 05. lingering touches against the others face. 06. wraps their arms around the other from behind and rests their head on the others shoulder.
𝐬𝐚𝐝𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 -
01. wiping their eyes before someone can notice. 02. pressing their face into a pillow to muffle sobs. 03. pulls the other into a desperate hug and wont let go. 04. silently reaching for the others hand, needing comfort. 05. walks into the room with red-rimmed eyes and no words.
𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 -
01. spins the other around without warning in a hug. 02. links arms with the other and tugs them along happily. 03. provides the other with a handmade gift. 04. tackles the other in a sudden and joyful hug. 05. kisses the others cheek unexpectedly and grins.
𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐫 -
01. backing away slowly and looking for exits. 02. hiding behind the other and peeking around. 03. flinches at sudden movement from the other. 04. presses their back against the wall with eyes darting around the room. 05. jumps at a noise and instinctively grabs the others hand.
𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠
01. tucks a blanket gently around the other person's shoulders. 02. applies a bandage with slow and deliberate care. 03. brings them food and water and watches to ensure they eat. 04. runs fingers through their hair in efforts to soothe. 05. rubs soothing circles on the others back while they cry. 06. stays silently by the others side in support without saying a word.
𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠
01. raises a hand but hesitates. 02. grips the others arm a bit too tightly. 03. pushes the other away with more force than necessary. 04. turns their back on the other to begin walking away without a word. 05. rips a shared photo in half without a word. 06. steps in closely with cold and narrowed eyes.
Every so often I think about Ed having to go to Roy after discovering what he and Al do about Tucker and Nina… blood on his automail knuckles, peeking through the torn fabric of his gloves… so furious and ravenous for punishment that the set of his jaw somehow helps him get the words out… eyes burning like that of real flames… telling of what should have been something out of a fictional horror novel he’s too young to read, but was instead much, much too real
ᯓ★ PROMPTS FROM THE MOVIE HEATHERS ( 1989 ) .ᐟ
╰› “Well, fuck me gently with a chainsaw.” ╰› “Do I look like Mother Teresa? If I did, I probably wouldn't mind talking to the geek squad!” ╰› “Let's knock off early. Buy some shoes. Something lame like that.” ╰› “I don’t like my friends.” ╰› “My son's a homosexual, and I love him. I love my dead gay son.” ╰› “I don’t patronize bunny rabbits.” ╰› “If you were happy every day of your life you wouldn't be a human being. You'd be a game-show host.” ╰› “What is this? Blackmail?” ╰› “Oh, don't worry. I'll ask you to do me a favor. That will be one you'll enjoy.” ╰› “They are just people I work with and and our "job" is being popular and shit.” ╰› “The only place different social types can genuinely get along with each other is in heaven.” ╰› “If you think I'm doing another suicide note you're wrong!” ╰› “You were nothing before you met me.” ╰› “I use my grand IQ to decide what color lip gloss to wear in the morning and how to hit three keggers before curfew...” ╰› “God, ( NAME ). My afterlife is so boring. I have to sing Kumbaya one more time...” ╰› “You don't get it do you?” ╰› “This isn't just a spoke in my menstrual cycle.” ╰› “He used a real gun. They should throw his ass in jail.” ╰› “I say we just grow up, be adults and die.” ╰› “Today was great! Chaos is great. Chaos is what killed the dinosaurs, darling.” ╰› “I just killed my best friend.” ╰› “She's my best friend. God, I hate her.” ╰› “What is your damage, ( NAME ) ?” ╰› “You’re beautiful.” ╰› “You wanted to be a member of the most powerful clique in school. If I wasn't already the head of it, I'd want the same thing.” ╰› “Your society nods its head at any horror the American teenager can think to bring upon itself.” ╰› “Just another case of a geek trying to imitate the popular people and failing miserably.” ╰› “Did you have a brain tumor for breakfast?” ╰› “Whether to kill yourself or not is one of the most important decisions a teenager can make.” ╰› “You inherit 5 million dollars the same day aliens land on the earth and say they're going to blow it up in 2 days. What do you do?” ╰› “Oh, you're so smart.” ╰› “That's the stupidest question I've ever heard.” ╰› “When teenagers complain that they want to be treated like human beings, it's usually because they are being treated like human beings.” ╰› “They all want me as a friend or a fuck. I'm worshiped at this school and I'm only a junior.” ╰› “Oh, come on, a lot of people drink mineral water, it's come a long way.” ╰› “Did that sound bitchy?” ╰› “Holy Mary who art in Heaven pray for us sinners... so we don't get caught.” ╰› “Nice guys finish last, I should know.” ╰› “I don't know. This kind of thing leaves a bad taste in my mouth.”
open
“What?!” The Fullmetal Alchemist snaps, without bothering to check at whom he’s incidentally chosen to lash out. “What do you want? I’m busy.”
open
It’s not rare to see a sour expression on Edward Elric’s face— in fact, calling that understatement would be itself a severe minimization of the truth— but usually, the source of the mood is self-evident. The teen tends to broadcast his ire to anyone who happens to be nearby, whether he intends to or not, whether that person intends to be dragged in, or not.
But if something set him off in that moment, then the culprit is either already gone, or hidden beneath the surface, Ed’s glare the icy hummock, the rest of the mass looming below and out of sight.
It’s when another body enters the room that the boy cracks a bit, his eyebrow twitching, his head hunching harder over his notebook, spread out on the table in front of him. He mutters sullen curses beneath his breath and not-so-subtly watches what the newcomer is doing, eyeing to see if they need something from him— or if they’d like to start something with him.
He would be happy to oblige if they’d like to start something with him.
I am so sore today, so Ed is too
“I didn’t know nightmares could become reality…”
Inbox call! Like for a gremlin 😈
I’ve been so crazy busy with life but I swear I still remember this blog, and I am gonna get my activity back up!! I’ve just got a lot of life stuff going on rn. On the bright side, one of the more exciting ones is that next weekend, I’ll be Ed at a con, complete with his full automail arm! I’ll post pics once I have em!
Today would be a pretty funny day to post on for this acc huh
@animangacreators challenge 29: drama genre ⤷ a self-sacrificing moment
Alphonse's Sacrifice from Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood