see you vamp cowboy

em | texas i’m 26 why did I make a twilight sideblog

[rachelsennott]

TWILIGHT (2008) dir. Catherine Hardwick

[renegadepack]

“i put in a cd of violent music” ok edgelord

[cosmicangst]

she’s literally just eating mushroom ravioli

[cowjasperboy]

for reference this is edward’s reaction to bella using a hair dryer

[teamjacobthot]

"I took another quick breath, through my teeth, and winced as the taste scorched the inside of my throat" I stg Bella is just weed

you’re like my own personal brand of kush

[cowjasperboy]

also I stg if edward compares himself to hades one more time I’m going to shove a big juicy pomegranate up his ass

[cowjasperboy]

edward: tell me about your first date

bella: *talks about her sixth grade square dancing partner*

edward:

[cowjasperboy]

[asdfgbhjkfrgfkslehelsfhelfew-de]

[cowjasperboy]

bella: bites her lip for half a second

edward: 🥵🥵🥵

[cowjasperboy]

take a shot every time bella blushes

[exceptionally-unobservant]

Waiting for Midnight Sun like

[locknessiecullen]

The year is 2035. We’re all actual adults, some of us with kids called Rosalie and Leah, others no longer writing fics about Bella’s bussy. The world is finally at peace.

Out of nowhere the satanic mormon housewife attacks. She announces that she has rewritten New moon from Jacob’s perspective. “Blood crescent”. We riot.

This happens every ten years till Robert Pattinson finally has enough and fights her in a field of snow. He defeats the evil. 100 or so years pass. A child called 8-e:lay (Pronounced Hayleigh) finds an old file, it’s titled “Sunlight” ...the Seth Clearwater story...

[muppetmagic]

by choosing the apple as bella’s symbol on the cover of the original publication we gained insight into the themes of innocence and lust, temptation and choice, similar to adam & eve followed throughout the saga. by using a cracked and dripping ripe pomegranate as the symbol for edward’s side of the story we, as the audience, are able to gain insight into edward’s love for eating pussy. dare i say, his willingness to eat out.

[bellasredchevy]

esme when she heard that edward’s new human gf named bella was coming over:

[twilight-af-deactivated20220701]

[cowjasperboy]

i made a twilight sideblog huh. i did that