regret in its purest form

alan | 24 | they/them | reblogs whatever i like and dont tag shite | my biggest regret is making any bnha posts thanks

[are-they-a-faggot]

sorry i said id go to bed but this is The funniest thing ive seen in like the past like. 4 days thanks oomf

[biscuit-launcher]

bloodied guzma full version

[lengthy-artery]

tshirt concept

[starvulture]

Collecting these rn

[xenosaurus]

vaguely working on a vampire comedy about a group of vampires dealing with the death of their sire, not because they're mourning him, but because they're rapidly realizing that a lot of the Vampire Rules were him just straight up fucking with them

[xenosaurus]

what do you MEAN we can go out in the daytime, he just didn't want his neighbors to notice that he had half a dozen twinks in matching outfits hidden in his basement???

[xenosaurus]

YES it’s about the stark absurdity of looking back on an abusive situation you thought was normal YES it features a scene where a bunch of vampires in anachronistic formal wear try a ton of off-brand sodas from the dollar store to see which ones make them puke

[xenosaurus]

Original rule: vampires cannot eat and must consume the blood of the living

Proposed theory: vampires cannot eat solid food but otherwise go wild

Results: Carbonation Bad. Pudding counts as a liquid. Vampires can be deeply, horrifically lactose intolerant.

[atomic-darth]

Turns out that vampires aren’t weak to garlic, The Sire was just allergic and if he couldn’t enjoy garlic bread then nobody could.

[zinjanthropusboisei]

There are some specific-ass subreddits and cookiecutters in this world

[machinot]

when u look at 2017 and think “oh that’s only like 3 years ago” and it’s actually 12,000 years ago and everything is gone and everyone you know has been reduced to ash and the world is completely different

[karmacamilleon]

they call me an undercover agent. the way i’m. under the covers :) cozy in bed :)

[karmacamilleon]

they call me a sleeper agent the way i. well. i shan’t say.

[demilypyro]

vampires are so full of shit. "oh the human race is beneath us, you're just livestock to us" I don't think you know what livestock is. do you feed us? care for us? protect us from predators? no. you just slink around dark alleys and ambush people. that's not what a higher being does. that's a bottom feeder. a parasite. karate punches your head off

[dogpuppy]

[alwayscraftynight-deactivated20]

pet peeve of mine

[dogpuppy]

[daggerdoggy]

Hey bro on a scale of nothingburger to everythingbagel how would you rate our gay sex last night

[dogpuppy]

[boccher]

crotch is literally the most comfortable place to lay your hands. especially with thighs pressing on them. but im scared people will think im a pervert of sex

[the-most-phenomenal-banana]

the way trump is talking abt hillary makes him sound like a scorned lover lmao what if monica wasn’t bill’s only side bitch??

[the-most-phenomenal-banana]

you gotta be fucking kidding me

[maxleggy]

so how's that "running half the internet on amazon's servers" thing going for everyone.

[maxleggy]

hey so how's that "running half the internet through cloudflare" thing going for everyone