Hiding In Plain Sight

[creamnsugar]

It’s been a long time. Feeling super low. I know it will pass. It always does. Until then…it’s a hard day in a hard eternity.

[creamnsugar]

[just-shower-thoughts]

You know it’s true love when watching them do absolutely nothing strikes you with pure elation.

[creamnsugar]

The secret to my love story is simple…my significant other reads to me every night before bed. I don’t recall my parents reading to me as a child. Maybe they did. Maybe they didn’t. Doesn’t matter. I get lots of bedtime stories now.

[infpisme]

[positiveupwardspiral]

[creamnsugar]

I hurt my first real boyfriend. We were 15. What did we expect? We met in a place where everyone had baggage and no one talked about it.

In 1997/98 he was hurting and he called me. I talked him off the ledge.

Rinse, wash, repeat. Sometimes I reached out to him because he wouldn’t leave my mind. Sometimes he would send up the flare.

In my heart I know that he feels hurt and sees me as someone who hurt him and so he thinks I have the answer to “fix it”

I am his soulmate. His karmic connection. We will continue to meet over and over until he finds peace. The problem is, I can’t heal his wounds. He has to. He just doesn’t realize that he is tethering me to him.

[creamnsugar]

I am getting away this weekend. I am thrilled to stay in a hotel and have a whole bed to myself.

It will be a volunteer/working weekend. I am thrilled for the change in pace and a different form of responsibility.

[creamnsugar]

Today the landscaper sent my estimate. My partner signed off on it. I am so happy.

[creamnsugar]

I vanished for a while. The depression swept me out to sea. It didn’t drown me. The salt of my tears kept me afloat. It’s time for me to get my shit together.

[creamnsugar]

[thelightworkersedge-deactivated]

[creamnsugar]

I walked outside and was embraced by the light and energy of the full moon. Every one needs to cleanse in light and darkness.

[creamnsugar]

I was about to message 2 friends and tell them I am depressed. I feel unmotivated. Lonely. It occurred to me that by putting it out to them it would seem that I expect them to help. There isn’t help. There isn’t an answer. It’s where my head currently is. It’s not something they can fix. And so. I will put it here.

[just-shower-thoughts]

Henry VIII took fuck, marry, kill way too seriously

[creamnsugar]

This made me literally LOL

[creamnsugar]

I sat down at my makeup table and replaced old brushes with new. I didn’t do my makeup. What a great feeling.

[creamnsugar]

I wish this was a lesson we taught. Not everyone is extraordinary. Nothing wrong with being happy and blending in.