Balm for the Broken, Ch. XXVII
Summary: Cheery young aide Elle Andersen has a natural propensity for care and comfort, making her an ideal compatriot for Captain America, Sergeant James “Bucky” Barnes, and the rest of the ineffable Howling Commandos.
Warning(s): Smut
Word Count: Approx. 12k
The cities were dead. Broken and carved out on edges of pain and remembered tragedy. Scarcely three decades had passed since the first wave of total war, since the enemies had come stomping through dirt and blood and the white earth to break their hearts. Their spirits. Deeper autumn had unwound so tightly, giving birth now to a frigid, frightened winter – in the Ardennes, the Allied troops stuck in against a furious, desperate effort by the Germans. Elle had seen it for herself: a forest pockmarked with foxholes, wherein sat men waiting for death or hope, it was hard to tell. The Howling Commandos had been sent in with a contingent of the 107th as support in a minor pushback – having access to encoded transmissions from HYDRA command meant that the SSR could now dispatch aid and information far more rapidly and clearly than before.
But Europe was broken. Dead. Cities cratered and splintered; eyes empty and wanting. Guilt had slid so thickly in her stomach, Elle could hardly sleep, hardly bear to look. What were they with their clean uniforms and the secret of a wedding buried so shallowly in heated gazes? She’d felt a fool, a rotten fool, walking through a graveyard of men yet to die, already shrouded and entombed, just waiting for a last glimpse of the sky. “A woman,” they’d hissed, leering at her, crying for her. Bucky had held her close; Gabe stepping to shield her from grabbing hands.
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“Broken and carved out on edges of pain and remembered tragedy.” LOVED this line.
“Bucky had held her close; Gabe stepping to shield her from grabbing hands.” I’m glad she has the guys there to protect her.
“understanding that she represented something more these men than an unconventional soldier with a spotless uniform and a tidy braid of hair: a mother, a daughter, sister, lover – walking through the shattered, ghost-lit ruins of home.” Your explanation was heartbreakingly beautiful.
“ She loved a good dress, good accessories – glitz and glam and anything to catch a certain soldier’s eye.“ Who can blame her really.
I’m sure she’d look beautiful in that dress. But I’m going to have to agree with Hannah that she should have something new and fancy for her wedding.
“ She’d claim herself in a new, better world as James Barnes’ wife, and do it with love, and with pride.” Love this.
Thank goodness for Peggy. And for Phillips’ soft spot for her (no matter what he says).
“Hannah’s admitted main goal was simply to introduce Gabe Jones’ jaw to the floor of the village hall by the time the clock struck twelve on the new year.“ HA. I like that goal.
“It was humbling, she supposed, to learn how much she was loved. “ Aw, but she’s so so loved.
Interesting that Gabe is Bucky’s best man...
““I’m glad you two aren’t waiting,” he’d whispered. “I’m glad you’re doing this now.”“ And they have Gabe’s blessing, hooray!
Is she about to pass out in this shop?!
“she did require a few negligees, a new brassiere, and a gleaming set of garters“ I’m glad Hannah is there to help her with all this stuff.
“but three times Elle had managed to a spectacular impression of a flailing giraffe“ Hahaha. I don’t do well with ice either, Elle.
“ Knowing she and his best friend would come back husband and wife, and poor Steve would be none the wiser“ OH NO. I don’t like that one bit.
I totally get WHY they have to do it this way. But I’m already so heartbroken for Steve that he doesn’t get a chance to be there for the wedding.
“Privacy would surely be a delicious sort of wedding gift.” Ha, ain’t that the truth.
The way you wrote the uncertainty of this crash/accident is giving me major anxiety. Kudos to you.
““Oh, baby,” he murmured. “You’re fine, you’re so safe, baby. I’m here.”” MY HEART.
“The kids are alright, just a little shaken up. Hannah went to talk to them and she’s gonna help the mom get ‘em home.”” Thank goodness for that.
“Bucky’s curious gaze peered into the bag – and his head shot immediately back up, the flush spreading now down his neck, sputtering out an apology that finally, finally lightened Elle’s heart and bought a pretty, tinkling laugh. “Uh, that looks…uh, um, p-pretty,” he rasped. “I mean, I shouldn’t have…I didn’t mean to…God, I’m sorry, baby, I thought it would be a dress, honest…”” HAHAHA. This made me giggle so much.
““I love you,” she said, more air than words, but it was everything. Bucky’s face relaxed, softening in plain relief. He dipped his head, just slightly, to kiss her sweet and silent, breathing out a reply against her lips that had her melting, and burning, all at once.” I LOVE THEM SO MUCH.
This room sounds gorgeous. I loved her description of everything.
This vicar is the real MVP.
“And then, to her red-cheeked self-consciousness, Lady Marleigh had requested Elle add her name, too.” YES. I LOVE THAT SHE WANTED HER AUTOGRAPH TOO. CAUSE SHE’S A HOWLIE.
“Parts of her life that the boy had never touched. As though she had become wholly her own person in the time apart.” GOOD. I HATE THAT BOY.
“It was a gilded thread between them, the way her shy smile bloomed into his“ These two are so in love and I AM HERE FOR IT.
I don’t know who is more ready for this night, these two or me.
“remembering the balm of her father’s, and wished, with a ripping kind of pain, that he and her mother could be here tonight.” Aw, I am sad they aren’t here to see how well Bucky loves her.
“Bucky with his smile in his dress greens, a drink in hand and a laugh on his lips.“ Damn, I bet he looks so good.
“blue was his, and so was she.” LOVED THIS.
“ Gabe had been quite looking forward to this performance“ I CANNOT tell you how much I love that Gabe is so into this and so supportive.
“on her sixth glass of cider, that she really ought to feel more drunk; but save for a tingling in her fingertips and a swooping in her belly, she felt nothing but bubbling joy, excitement.” Are you trying to tell me she got shot up with the serum? Or just her adrenaline isn’t allowing for her to get drunk right now?
I also love that Ines is so into it. I wouldn’t expect it from her, but I love it.
““I won’t. Nothing will go wrong now, I promise. Not tonight.”” Gosh, I hope she’s right.
““He will make it good for you,” Ines finished firmly, “because if he doesn’t, I will murder him. Tell him that, won’t you?”” BAHAHAHA. INES OUT HERE DOING GOD’S WORK. I LOVE IT.
“Elle kissed her husband at the first stroke of 1945; tears sliding between their lips and laughter in their eyes and memory shining bright and sweet between them.“ YAAAAAAAAS.
““No matter where we are, I want you to know, this is the happiest I have ever been.”Swallowing thickly, he dipped his forehead to touch hers. “This is everything,” he said softly, hoarsely. “You are everything.”” THANK YOU, BUCKY BARNES, FOR MAKING ME CRY.
“War watched them, as it always did. Keeping that dark vigil from the unseen corner of every room, licking its sharp teeth“ I both loved and hated this.
“not a man, not himself, and over and over again he tried, he tries, he wants to be himself, but he can’t, they won’t let him, he’s theirs – “ I don’t love this way of thinking.
MY HEART IS BREAKING FOR HIM. I hope that he’ll be able to talk to her about this one day and she’ll be able to reassure him that she doesn’t think of him like that at all.
But his cute little nervousness is the cutest.
“he wondered about the scar he’d expected to see, from where the bullet had grazed her in Romania, but there was nothing save soft skin, smooth and unblemished.” Another hint about serum?!
“no one had written this before, because it was wholly, unendingly, forever theirs.” LOVE THIS.
WOW. They are only kissing and I’m already hot and bothered.
““You look handsome in this, love, but –”” TAKE IT OFF.
“ just that such things spoke of home, of the future. Of building a past together. “ What a sap, I love it.
THIS IS ALL SO HOT. AND LOVING. AND UMPF.
““You have a lovely bottom,” she said, lips curling into a bright smile, leaning back on her elbows.” I am just glad that every one is in agreement with this.
““We…we can’t exactly have a…a baby right now,” he panted“ Well at least he’s being responsible.
“Elle Barnes dozed in her husband’s arms, and dreamt again of a little girl, an Indiana farmhouse, summer sunshine and flowers growing bright.“
