dc, marvel, anything super @criminallyvigilant - Tumblr Blog

⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻ 2016 // 2026 ⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻

real situations they put peter parker into #grateful

One of the joys of being a stucky fan is watching episode 3 of heated rivalry and just knowing who was who in that original fic

Like

papillon-de-porcelaine

Hail Mary, full of Grace...

tryksters

they matched each others freak. 42 injured. 7 dead. 12 missing.

boligolov

GRRRRR lizard

tz-polls

then vs now 🥲

junkdrawertales

Grace’s dome is implied to have weather patterns, since the fog is somewhat new and it took several tries to get right. Simulated weather! How neat! You know what comes with simulated weather?

Simulated meteorology.

Every day, Grace gets an email containing a Weather Update from his care team. It’s in video form, and it has a little intro jingle at the beginning. Then a meteorology technician scuttles into view.

“Hello Grace! Today Grace’s weather is 19 degrees. Will rise to 22 degrees at noon and then return to 19 degrees in evening. Wind is scheduled to blow from south-west, containing 15% moisture. Ultraviolet index 3.5 for vitamin D development. Grace advised to apply protective mineral paste. This has been Grace Weather Report. 🎶🎶🎶 signing off statement!”

transtarks

no because i LOOOOVE the idea that grace is 100% on board with being studied and kinda poked and prodded by eridian doctors. he’s a scientist, and his only hard line is obviously being like. vivisected lol. but here’s a piece of muscle tissue i won’t miss (and of course this becomes the meburgers), here’s a nail clipping, some of my hair, bodily fluids, go ahead and scan me listen to me monitor me learn all you can about me! he’s enthusiastic as hell about it, even though rocky might not be, but grace knows how exciting it must be for them to be able to study alien life for the first time and they’re SO respectful about it too. this is the thing that saved our planet and one of our people, we will learn everything we can about him in the most careful of ways so we know how to take care of him forever.

junkdrawertales

in another 50 years when an official human delegation comes to Erid for the first time they’re amazed at how comfortable it is: there’s already a large habitat with a beach, and plumbing, and human-sized furniture, there’s lights, there’s a radio, there’s a big library of translated Eridian novels. Someone’s built Rubik’s Cubes, recreated several Earth board games, they have a gym and a hot tub and even a water slide! Someone made them a water slide!

Turns out a whole team of Eridians spent the last thirty years of Ryland Grace’s life building random Earth stuff just for kicks. They made everything. Bath bombs, a snow cone machine, raspberry flavored toothpaste, bouncy balls, glow in the dark paint, a puppet theater, artificial grass, beanbag chairs, pool floaties, LEGO bricks, a porch swing, a bicycle, a pottery wheel, pretty much anything they could find instructions for on Stratt’s pirated library, which was A LOT. Enrichment galore. Grace was starting every day by opening presents from his personal team of zoologists.

“Good morning Grace! New item for you. Science team has synthesized Earth ‘silly putty’ for sensory enrichment. You like question?”

bramblepatch

Grace explaining sheepishly to Eridian linguists that the reason he uses different pronouns for Rocky than for the rest of the population is that he reflexively defaulted to assigning Rocky the same grammatical and social gender that he himself uses, in a way that has historical precedent but in modern English is considered somewhat chauvinistic and backward, and he's not proud of it but also the habit is pretty deeply ingrained now and unless Rocky objects it's probably easier to just keep on as he has been...

and immediately being informed lol. lmao. do not even worry about it. you have no idea what kind of buck wild grammatical constructs Rocky has invented for you. everyone else addresses you as foreigner/scholar. they're somehow managing to refer to you as their sibling, ward, and semidivine culture hero at the same time every time they talk about you.

junkdrawertales

Grace is under fifty so he’s technically a pebble, but he’s a human adult, and also as the only survivor of the Hail Mary he gets the Captain’s rank, and he’s also got a PhD so he’s also addressed as Dr. and on top of that he’s got Weird Alien Pronouns which there is no word for in Eridian so they approximate, while also adding on about five honorifics. The end result is “Honorable Beloved Teacher Dr. Captain Grace The Human (who we love)” which is pronounced with a word Rocky made up that means “male”, kind of, if you squint—it’s a vibrato suffix that rhymes with one of the words for “adolescent”, since Grace’s single-sex biology seems equivalent to a juvenile Eridian who has only developed one-half of their reproductive characteristics.

junkdrawertales

the Hail Mary is an aggressively sterile environment for safety purposes: can’t have humanity’s last hope contaminating their research or unleashing viruses on space! Which means that Grace’s microbiome is very very fragile. He’s not exchanging microbes with the environment around him because the only yeasts on the whole ship belong to him. He needs to replenish them somehow or he could get sick!

anyway that’s why Simon Iron Lung needs to spit in Grace’s mouth. It’s for his health.

lenin-it-to-win-it

It’s so funny how like. Spock is queer bc of the subtext, the Otherness inextricable from his character, meanwhile William Shatner was handed the straightest man of all time on paper and fumbled the bag bc he couldn’t stop giving Leonard Nimoy fuck-me eyes and now he lives in a bi Kirk hell of his own devising, forever enduring the conshatquences of his shactions