SCHADENFREUDE

Carter Caine; The Wolf Of The Legal System. Livin' in LA, stickin' people in the slamma, doin' what I do best o' all; Being the best. Some content NSFW. ((Independent Ace Attorney OC RP blog. Multi-fandom friendly.))

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

"I beg t’ differ, but okay, I’ll let that one go. Say, uh, von Karma, why’re you so tiny all the sudden? Thought you was like, uh, taller. Like, Edgeworth sized, but not."

[godsgifttotheprosecutors-deacti]

…Oh. You must have met someone who spoke to you of a future-me. Yes, it seems the multi-verse does have you getting some sort of strange idealized impressions of people, but I am 14 years old. I must say, when I grow older, I somehow decide to cut my hair short. You can tell the difference that way.

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

"…awright, I guess I’m naht arguin’. S’weird, this whole…multiverse thingamawhatsit. But hell, such is life. Feh.

"So, madam prodigy, you pass college already? Age of 14, woof, some sorta skill ya got. No wonder you’re always kickin’ ass in court. A step behind me, maybe, but I digress."

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

"…I like this girl."

[godsgifttotheprosecutors-deacti]

Flattery doesn’t suit one with your hair style, but the sentiment is appreciated anyways.

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

"I beg t' differ, but okay, I'll let that one go. Say, uh, von Karma, why're you so tiny all the sudden? Thought you was like, uh, taller. Like, Edgeworth sized, but not."

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

"...I like this girl."

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

- randomly passes on the street- '... weird hair.'

”..wha’chu sayin’, punk?”

[wanderingmercenary]

" Th’ hell did you just call me?"

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

"To ol' fashioned?"

"Sugar cube? Toots? God forbid, sweetheart?"

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

- randomly passes on the street- '... weird hair.'

”..wha’chu sayin’, punk?”

[wanderingmercenary]

" I didn’t say anything." ’ I need to take it easy on giving weird looks…’

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

"..."

"You ain't from 'round here, I take it. What's ya name, cupcake?"

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

- randomly passes on the street- '... weird hair.'

"..wha'chu sayin', punk?"

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

Turnabout Lights Out: Trial

[spark-burner]

Court was soon to be in session… Spark stood behind the defense’s bench, arms crossed, ready for another courtroom showdown….. Then he glanced towards the prosecutor slamming the doors of the courtroom. Oh great. (Him again, huh…..?) Carter Nash, cockiest prosecutor Spark has met yet, was his opponent standing on the opposite bench. Well, no turning back now. He just waited silently, just waiting for court to be in session.

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

No Griff means no help. Whatever, I can do it! I can do it all!

Carter gave himself a pep talk as he danced his way over to the prosecutor's bench, shooting the lawyer a gleaming glare as he stepped into his place.

"Hope you're ready for this case, kid," he sneered, baring his teeth. "This'll be one ya won't forget."

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

Turnabout Lights Out: Trial

"'Nother day, 'nother sap I'm gonna put behind bars!" Carter strutted happily through the halls of the courthouse, the Octavius brothers in tow. "I swear, I'm gonna fuckin'--" "Dude, stop." The policemen bickered as the prosecutor skipped along his merry way, eventually making it to the courtroom. "Au revoir, compadres," he said boldly, opening the door with a flourish. "Griffon, can y--" The three men paused, all eyes focusing on Carter. "...oh. Right." He shook his head, turning away from them. "Never mind. I can take care o'this! I'm frickin great!" As the door slammed in the face of the policemen, the two brothers glanced at each other. "He can't put Griffey away." "It's up to Spark, as of now."

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

Fun Fact: Carter & Olivia

Carter is, in fact, a generally unfeeling, hurtful, inconsiderate jerk, but he DOES love Olivia with all his heart and soul. Their relationship was originally built on aesthetic appearance, but over the few years, Carter's grown to love her for...just being Olivia. Of course he's blind to the fact that she will never love him, but as long as he's trapped in his illusion, he will love her until the day he dies. He never uses or abuses her, never forces her to do anything, always tells her to be honest, and is basically a decent human being. Carter does genuinely care for Olivia because he KNOWS he's the luckiest man alive for getting someone like her to put up with him. And he's right, although Olivia hates him with all her soul.

[pleasetakemetothestars-deactiva]

"Young romance? Dude, you’ve got it wrong. We aren’t even datin’. We’re just friends, whoever you are."

Now, that wasn’t really the important thing here, anyways.

"But I guess you pointed it out ‘cause you wanna be in a relationship yourself."

"I doubt that’ll ever happen t’you, though. You couldn’t get in a non-forced relationship even if you tried with your attitude. Hell, I doubt anyone wants t’be around you except for the little strength you’ve got."

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

"I got a wife, if that's enough for ya," he snickered, leering at him. "S'pose ya don't know who ah am."

"I know your 'BFF' Apollo, keh, mister Shrimpy," he snorted, rolling his eyes again. "I'm in the law as well, squirt. Prosecutor. Caine-comma-Carter." Carter finished with a flourish as if he was the Queen of England. "Try me, I bet I can out prosecute Ol' Edgy any damn day."

"Anyway, you know how Sir 'Francy' is all stuttery and all dat," he continued in a rather bored tone. "Yeah. My work. Beauty, ain't he?" Carter sighed, smiling off into the distance. "Beautiful when someone finally knows there place in this cruel world."

[pleasetakemetothestars-deactiva]

"I’m not telling you where Francy is, asshat,” he snarled. “I don’t care if I’m dying for this, but I’m not sayin’ a word.”

Clay cracked his knuckles, a piercing glare in his eyes. “I’m more than willin’ to fight you if you’re givin’ him a hard time, though. I’m not an astronaut for nothin’.”

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

"Oh, how heroic, Jack Dawson dying to save Rose," he teased, lacing his fingers together. "Ah, young romance." Carter scoffed, his wine red eyes shooting a piercing glance at the astronaut. 

"Such things are outdated."

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

((gODDAMMIT MOBILE LINKS))

[pleasetakemetothestars-deactiva]

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

“Heh heh. You gotta be lookin’ fer trouble that case,” he chuckled. “I take it he hasn’t told you, or perhaps you haven’t seen yet?”

Carter smiled, rolling his eyes. “I can only assume your his latest boyfriend.”

[pleasetakemetothestars-deactiva]

He probably would’ve let everything slide if he...

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

Carter took the punch in stride, pinching his eyes shut as his fist collided with his face. He grinned through the pain, wiping the corner of his mouth.

"You're lots of fun, squirt. Got lots of spunk in ya, I like it. But really, tell me where Francis is. I've got some unfinished business."

Even Carter couldn't help but grin even wider.

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

You’re a fool, just like him.

"Pardon, perhaps you know him as Francis," Carter said, staring at the man dryly. "Francis Free? The world’s biggest mistake?"

[pleasetakemetothestars-deactiva]

(…Wow. Okay. This guy’s like those assholes back in highschool.)

"Yeah, I know ‘im. Judging by your attitude, you don’t exactly like ‘im. I’m not gonna tell you anything."

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

“Heh heh. You gotta be lookin’ fer trouble that case,” he chuckled. “I take it he hasn’t told you, or perhaps you haven’t seen yet?”

Carter smiled, rolling his eyes. “I can only assume you're his latest boyfriend.”

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

"Heh. Heya, squirt. Tell me, ya seen Frankie ‘round here? I gotta tell ‘im somethin’."

[pleasetakemetothestars-deactiva]

(…I’m gettin’ a bad vibe, here…)

"Err… no. I haven’t. Sorry. Who’s Frankie? I don’t know a Frankie."

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

You're a fool, just like him.

"Pardon, perhaps you know him as Francis," Carter said, staring at the man dryly. "Francis Free? The world's biggest mistake?"

[pleasetakemetothestars-deactiva]

criticalhitonyourselfesteem

"Oh, hey there! Welcome to Cosmos Space Center!"

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

"Heh. Heya, squirt. Tell me, ya seen Frankie 'round here? I gotta tell 'im somethin'."

[pleasetakemetothestars-deactiva]

I have yet to find someone that’d be enemies with Clay

I’m almost sad

[criticalhitonyourselfesteem]

"Careful what you wish for."