CATHARSIS.

multimuse. FREY ( him / they ). gmt +8.

[cthrsvs]

i basically only drop by here to tell people of my latest obsessions so if anyone wants to rp tian guan ci fu (i’d love to rp hua cheng or pei ming, i just finished reading the novel), captive prince (auguste, laurent) or the tarot sequence (rune rune baybee) just hit me up ?? like this or leave me a message ??

[cthrsvs]

like this if you want to rp captive prince with me ?? willing to rp auguste or laurent (or both, i love the vere brothers) !!

[cthrsvs]

rest in peace & power, miura haruma. this world didn’t deserve someone as brilliant as you.

i wanted to use him as a fc for a muse and i don’t remember which muse nor whether or not i went through with it in the end/if people saw it, but i just wanted to say that i will not be using him as a fc (anymore), if i ever come back.

i’m just so sad and still in denial, a part of me is still hoping news will come out saying that he’s fine and healthy now.

[cthrsvs]

does anyone want to rp LOGH/LOTGH with me...... i even already have YANG WEN LI and OSKAR VON REUENTHAL's blogs all set up (though reuenthal's dossier is still in the works), and i'd absolutely jump at the possibility of rping my love FREDERICK JASPER from the 730 mafia !! they can be fandomless/oc friendly but i kind of don't have the creative braincells for 'vanilla' plots atm...... ( @magicianbled​ / @winespilt​ )

[cthrsvs]

i'm still not here & fickle with my writing but i forgot i had those two replies sitting in my drafts and wanted to post them ?

also i saw a certain Someone followed me back in feb (you know who you are, i'll probs im you soon 👀) so if you're who i think you are and if you love me, hit me up ??

if anyone wants my discord just lemme know !!

also i'm sad i never got to use the full range of my yankai gif icons so these icons are merely self-gratuitous at Best, stan snow man thanks

best regards, frey

[cthrsvs]

collapsecolours‌:

it wasn’t like tenma chose to become the future ceo of fujifilm either. it was in his birthright and had to own up to that path that was chosen for him. the reason his siblings were able to have such a freedom of choosing their lives was because his own was already determined.

tenma gave a light smile, chuckling softly before his shoulders raised in a shrug, “you always remind me how the high society thinks…” he hummed out softly, though nothing in his sentence was meant for offense. there were many times when people around him — especially friends of his siblings — were so open minded that he sometimes  f o r g o t how most of high ranking society thought. but si woon’s words always brought him the reality of how things work.

fingers gently tapped the side of his champagne glass, his still half full, only watching the other male DROWN his in one gulp. his own fingers grasped the stem of the champagne glass before taking a light sip of the clear liquid before setting it back on the table.

“and the whole world knows that kanae is pretty much single and too much into her own work to even date…” he said with a light smile on his features, “though i do understand that thought process and why people of high society would think that way. and as an older brother, i think i wouldn’t want her to marry if she didn’t want to. but anyway…” he hummed out, moving the conversation along, “how is your training going? any idea when you’ll take over the company?”

❝   hn .   ❞ siwoon replied noncommittally . it was true , he couldn't deny that his tutor's teachings and his parent's teachings had been ingrained into him and were burnt deep into his skin . that was not to say , however , that he agreed with them in any way . on the contrary , he had his own objections towards their backwards way of thinking -- there was absolutely nothing desirable about the prejudice that came from being associated with a social class deemed ❛ lower than ❜ .

but he was wise . to win the game you need to not only fully comprehend the rules , but to also bend yourself accordingly to make use of what's given to you . and he had full intentions of winning , whatever that would entail .

siwoon looked over to tenma simply as a show that he was paying attention , not even bothering to nod along and merely taking a few sips of his champagne . as happy as he was for the conversation to be diverted away from the youngest fujii,  he wasn't entirely pleased by the new topic either .

his father was a cold husk of a man and at first siwoon thought that was where he got it from , but his dearest ❛ mother ❜ shared the same quality -- or perhaps it was only directed at him , because she seemed to do well showing warmth to the boy in the room hidden deep within the mansion . surely , siwoon would have to see that prideful man's death long before siwoon could see the fruits of his labour . but siwoon knew the consequences if he were to utter the truth of the matter and so , he had to paint the same picture with different colours .

❝   my father dearly loves the company , and he finds joy in being as proactive as he can while he still can . sometimes i fear he loves the company more than he does our family .   ❞ he does , siwoon was certain of that on his end at least , and he doesn't care . his words come out as jest , however , with the tiniest hint of a smile on his face and the softest whisper of a chuckle in his voice . surely an oddity to those who knew siwoon , but the occasional show of emotions proved to them that siwoon was still relatively human and that , siwoon found , made them less wary of his normally cold and stoic demeanour .

❝   any tips on how to direct his passion elsewhere , let's say to a hobby or some kind , so he could finally pass down the mantle would be greatly appreciated .   ❞ siwoon was ready -- his father was just an asshole .

[cthrsvs]

peachyuus‌:

She had prepared for him to cry. She had prepared for him to beg and try to convince her to stay. But Lucy never really accounted for what could happen if he got angry. He was temperamental and she knew that, but this side of him was something different. Is this what he would be like after they got married? Was this really the persona lurking beneath the gentle man she fell for? Maybe this wasn’t as big of a mistake she she thought. Maybe..

Her thoughts cut short as she watched his foot drive into the wall. A part of her wants to reach forward and tell him to stop. He didn’t need to hurt himself over this. After all, it wasn’t as though they were already married. Relationships were temporary, weren’t they? Fragile and able to be broke at any time. So, why was he so upset? She blinked away the oncoming tears. While that small part of her wished she could offer him some sort of solace, the coward that resided in her heart told her to run. If she ran right now, perhaps she could get away. She could move cities and pretend this didn’t happen. Pretend he never existed. But if she did that, wouldn’t she be the monster? She didn’t want to hurt him, but she didn’t see any other choice.

“You’re scaring me, Taeyeol.” Her voice was low and hung in the air like the smoke of a cigarette. She should yell and scream, shouldn’t she? Isn’t that what break ups were like? She should cry and say she’s sorry. But instead of feeling remorse and guilt, the growing sensation in the pit of her stomach was simply disgust. After another moment, Lucy finally allowed her gaze to match his. She refused to blink, knowing that the moment she did would be the moment that the tears fell from her eyes. She couldn’t cry. She couldn’t show weakness. This was what had to be done. 

“I just don’t think we’re meant to be..” It was a cliche excuse and she had to scrape the inside of her conscience to find it. But it was true. They got along well and she did care for him, but she was too different. He was clingy and obsessive and Lucy was fluid and always changing. She didn’t know what kind of person she would be in a month’s time, but she was pretty sure Taeyeol would be exactly the same. His words were pathetic and it hurt Lucy to see him grasping for threads that were already severed. “I won’t make you waste your life waiting for me. What if I’m not ready in a year, or two years? What then?” 

patience is a virtue , patience is a virtue , taeyeol kept chanting to himself in his head . yet it was all for naught , he knew it was all for naught , because he knew that now there was nothing he could do to get her back to where they were , where they're supposed to be .

❝   do you think i'll give up this easily on you ?   ❞ taeyeol began in an almost whisper before he looked up at her and met her eyes head on -- god only knew the look on his face at that moment . ❝   is this a test ? if this is a test i'll get very angry , dear , you know i don't like games like this . don't test the sincerity of my love like this .   ❞

despite his playful teasing and jests , taeyeol was a hopeless romantic through and through . his dream girl , he always said , was someone who got cold easily , so he could wrap her up in a thick jacket or a thick blanket and hold her close , keep her warm and snug and safe in his arms . there was once a time that girl was lucy , but now the image had begun to fade and that terrified him .

anger gave way to fear , and then to the gut wrenching reality that she was lost to him now . emotions on high , a different sort of emotion now , he covered his eyes with a hand and slowly sank to the ground . with his feet planted firmly on the ground , he rested his elbows onto his knees and his head hung low , preventing her from seeing the tears that threatened to form under his eyes .

❝   am i so hard to love ?   ❞ his words were a mumble , fingers interlacing and shaking with the grip of his hands . ❝   why does everyone keep using me ? they all always use me to shower them with love , there's no such thing as too much love , they say. and yet once they get their fill , they run off and leave me . why ? why do people think i'm not human enough to experience pain ?   ❞

he knew why , and it was something he couldn't help . he was too different , he's heard it many times . too different from before the relationship began , when he was serious and too few shows of gentleness , compared to after , when he was all soft edges and warm embraces .

he knew why , but he couldn't help it . and now pain was his best friend .

[cthrsvs]

✨ indefinite hiatus ✨

due to lack of muse, i will be on INDEFINITE HIATUS and it’s safe to say that i will be dropping all threads here on this account . i’ll try my best to be online more . so feel free to ask for my DISCORD if you’d like to keep in touch !!

the main reason for my lack of muse is because all of my drive and inspiration has been going into developing my trilogy series ( which i’ve added japheth into , alongside erebos , so my muse for japheth sort of went to the trilogy ? ) . i’ve also not really had the biggest drive to write here in general like i have in the past ? i still love writing , but writing here is a bit different now and i can’t seem to stick to it like before ...

i’ll probably still be lurking around and keeping tabs on everyone but until then , see you guys !!

[cthrsvs]

what if i temporarily retire all of my muses minus jay

and add a demigod son of dionysos serial killer

[cthrsvs]

₪ ❉ ∞ ☁︎  (well, before I met you) ♕ [ *digs self a grave *]

from : @aniimvs ( x ) // still accepting !!

I still haven’t had the courage to send you an ask/reach out to youI’ve followed you for a long timeI hope we write for a really long time!I was intimidated by your disposition/afraid to follow/send an ask toI’m impressed with your writing!

EXCUSE YOU you have every right to spam my IMs !!! BECAUSE we’ve known each other for a while now LMAO i’m still sobbing that you remembered me and that we’re out here in 2k20 still up to things, thank you for not forgetting me you amazing human you  ❤︎❤︎❤︎

[cthrsvs]

∞ ❤︎ ☁︎ ♕

from : @collapsecolours ( x ) // still accepting !!

I hope we write for a really long time!you are my favorite writer of your museI was intimidated by your disposition/afraid to follow/send an ask toI’m impressed with your writing!

honestly i can’t remember if i was the first to message you but regardless i’m glad we got to talking and have these many threads now holy frick i saw you reply to my open starter too THANK YOU FOR YOUR EXISTENCE

[cthrsvs]

i know my replies are piling up but tbh i've been having so much drive and inspiration for the book i'm writing (it's gonna be a trilogy, and 13k words in and i'm still not sick of it i don't even know how with my limited attention span) so my muse here has been very finicky and i'm super sorry !!

promise i'll get to replies as soon as i can !!

[rp-helpdesk]

anonymous impressions

☁︎  I was intimidated by your disposition/afraid to follow/send an ask to

♨︎  you seem really chill and I can’t wait to start writing with you!

♕  I’m impressed with your writing! 

✘  I don’t like your writing

✁  we used to write together, but we don’t anymore.

♋︎  I feel like we’re really similar and would get along well.

♡  I have a tumblr crush on you

☯︎  you’ve helped me improve my writing 

₪  I still haven’t had the courage to send you an ask/reach out to you

℥  I envy you for _____ reason

∞  I hope we write for a really long time!

∅  you annoy me

☛  I have something I need to tell you in IMs

❤︎  you are my favorite writer of your muse

❉  I’ve followed you for a long time

▼ I’ve heard bad things about you

▲ I’ve heard good things about you

[cthrsvs]

if miyazawa were to be honest , her appearance at his door was far from a surprise . he supposed it would have happened eventually , after the rug he had just pulled from under her feet without notice , though even he was amazed by his immaculate timing of it all . to think she would be in japan the moment she received the news , how coincidental ! or at least , it would be a lot easier to assume it was only mere coincidence .

as always miyazawa was all smiles , pleasant in the way he greeted her and even more courteous in the way he invited her into his home , complete with preparing a pair of slippers for her ( it was the same pair of slippers she'd worn before at his apartment , but that was besides the point ) . without a care in the world , he ushered her into the living room and gestured towards the couch as he made his way over to the kitchen , midst preparing a drink for himself before he was interrupted by the visitor at his door .

❝   would you like some iced tea ? you arrived just in time actually , i was about to prepare a cup of coffee for myself , you know how it is for us busy people .   ❞ quick to fill the silence with his cheery tone , miyazawa was , albeit out of place amidst the growing tension in the room . // @cosmaeic​​​​ ( zhang daiyu ) liked for a starter ( ☆ ) from { miyazawa ryo }

[cthrsvs]

peachyuus‌:

Lucy wasn’t the easiest woman to love and she knew this. Whether it was them or her, something always went wrong. She was spoiled and her moods changed quicker than the tides. She was a bird, always in the sky and never landing in one place for too long. She needed constant change, movement in her life. Lucy couldn’t stand for things to get stagnant. And the weight of her relationship was beginning to take a toll on her. The proposal had seemed like a good idea in the first place, but now she was regretting the decision.

“It’s too much for me, Tae.” Lucy kept her eyes on the ground, unable to meet his gaze. If she looked into his eyes, she would cry and it would only weaken her resolve. That much she knew. She couldn’t let him see her weakness or else he might be able to convince her to stay. She loved him, there was no doubt in that, but she wasn’t cut out for married life. She couldn’t handle the idea of being tied down to someone forever, especially if that someone was Taeyeol. He was handsome and kind, but she wasn’t. She was frosty and distant and it would only be a matter of time until she broke his heart. It had been a tough decision to make, but now she couldn’t turn back. “I need space. I need.. time by myself. I’m sorry.”

❝   too much for you ,   ❞ taeyeol repeated in disbelief under his breath , a scoff escaping his lips and his frustration spilling out through a sarcastic laugh .

he walked over to a wall and gave it a hard kick . the pain radiated from his foot , protected by nothing more than his home slippers , up the stretch of his leg but he welcomed the pain ; for a brief moment , the pain took over and enveloped his anger whole . but eventually the pain subsided into a feint yet numbing sensation , and thus he was back again to the anger that now made him press his hand against the wall . pushing onto it firmly as though the action could channel his emotions to the wall instead , but to no avail .

❝   could you at least look me in the face while you betray me like this ? can you at least show me some level of respect , if you loved me at all ? while you shit on all the time we've spent together and all i've done for you , for us ,   ❞ he spoke in a low growl . despite his chastising , taeyeol too now looked to the ground , trying to hide from her the red now flashing before his eyes . if his kick to the wall hadn't scared her yet then surely the anger in his eyes would , and the last thing he wanted was for her to come to hate him .

he took another deep breath to steady himself , enough to speak in a soft voice , heavy with all his desperation -- there was now no use pretending he was anything but . ❝   if time is all you need , we don't have to get married right away . we can wait a year , two years , we can take as much time as you want . just don't leave me , i'll give you all the time you want . please . just don't leave me...   ❞

[cthrsvs]

collapsecolours‌:

the  t e n s i o n  between the two of them was HIGH, much like any other encounter that the two of them had previously. maki had always been a serious individual, only indulging himself in conversation that revolved around work, nothing more and nothing less. he rarely had thought of being around someone for purely entertainment purposes and thus why his reaction to jay’s suggestion of ‘hanging out’ was an odd one.

eyes watched, much like a hawk, as the other male pull away from his laptop screen and move closer to him. maki had rolled his chair back slightly, ensuring proper space between their bodies and so that jay was not impending his personal space.

a brow raised at the other’s nonchatant reply to his question  — and a slight scoff escaped his lips, “generosity comes with a price, i know that jay-san…” he commented as he looked up at the other. even though the other had immensely helped him with previous investigations with his leads, he knew that the other had something up his sleeve… —- everyone did in this world. no one gave anything for FREE or out of PURE generosity without something they wanted.

maki continued to stare up at the other, arms crossing over his chest. the words that the other uttered out were nothing but truth —  he had never placed him nor his team in any danger with his information. and usually with jay’s help with his leads, they are able to get more information to solve their cases. jay was a godsend, no matter what maki thought.

“…—-… FINE…” he utterly commented, “though i do have price for my time…” maki stood up from his chair, eyes looking at the other, “where do you get your information from…” he walked passed jay, to where his jacket draped over the back of the couch, “no matter what information i ask from you, you seem to retrieve it with ease, and so i ask where you get your information from…”

it was only after receiving sho's agreement that jay allowed for his smile to grow into a full on grin , only slightly smug by his present victory . the real victory , after all , was once he finally got a few drinks in sho's system . and who knows how long that would take .

❝   hmmm...   ❞ jay hummed in thought , for real this time . of course he had already considered the various options he could go with : he could flat out lie , he could give a half-lie , or he could give the full truth . the very last option , however , would result in more cons than pros for both of them and he figured deep down sho disliked the inefficiencies of unnecessary consequences . and so perhaps he'll go with the half-life , however he'll have to make the final judgement later on after further assessment .

jay stepped back around the desk with his hands behind his back , looking at sho head on without any pretenses . ❝   i promise to give you as much as i can . you'll just have to trust that whatever information i withhold is in both our best interests . truth be told , i gain more from your success than sabotaging your work . i hope my past achievements can lead you to believe that .   ❞ deep down , past his at times eccentric personality , jay was actually as serious as the came .

❝   but enough with the heavy , we can talk about all that through drinks .   ❞ a smile returned to jay's face . ❝   we can go wherever you want , even my own bar if that'll alleviate your suspicion towards me . i came here by car , however , so i'm afraid i'll have to drive us there . i'm sure you have more worries than my driving , yes ?   ❞ jay was certain he had driven sho to various locations before and he was by no means a bad driver -- if anything , he was the opposite . but sho tended to be a cynical one , always suspicious of others ; if jay could do anything to prove he wasn't up to no good , jay would gladly comply .

[cthrsvs]

collapsecolours‌:

a delicate brow raised at the other’s comment before returning back to her usual expression, shrugging her shoulders, “i am not surprised that it ran out of stock…” livie hummed out, “it’s absolutely gorgeous, and i thank you for getting me such limited edition~” she said with a small smile that tugged on her lips. it had always been nice to have friends that could get these items for her, even if her mother was a connection she could use too, she didn’t really want to use her mother. and since miyazawa was so helpful in gifting her such gifts, she didn’t mind.

when the male had ushered their waiter over, she gave a charming smile towards the male that had walked over as she picked up her menu to q u i c k l y scan what they had to offer before relaying her order of something simple pasta puttanesca. when the two of them had ordered, she handed the waiter the menu before eyes returned back to the other male, “i’ve been well, just doing the same old, same old… only projects that i have are the girls…” working with idol groups was meticulous — to ensure that they looked great on stage. her shoulders shrugged, “though i think there’s the winter fashion show coming up, no one has contacted me for any details, but i think i might be a featured make-up artist for that…”

miyazawa's eyes lit up and he didn't bother to conceal it , or on the contrary there was no need to . hiding it wouldn't change the fate that would befall upon those affected by his meddling , whether good or bad -- even if someone were to anticipate it , it was often too late before they found out about his plans , let alone prepare measures to counter against it . miyazawa worked swiftly and efficiently , with quick wit to envy . one of the many reasons why he was treasured so dearly by his allies , and despised so greatly by his rivals .

but alas , to the untrained eye , his now animated eyes may simply appear similar to that of the general ( feigned ) enthusiasm he always took to . miyazawa had always been delightful company , eager to please and quick to fall in people's good graces . the latter , however , cannot be said towards others in regards to miyazawa's own good graces .

❝   is that so ? congratulations ! well , it might be too soon but i'm sure you'll get it !   ❞ miyazawa enthused with a wide grin that was innocent like a child's , the same as it always was whenever in the company of others . but of course , miyazawa was far from innocent himself . ❝   strange that you haven't been contacted yet , though... i'm fairly certain i know the organisers , shall i give them a call ?   ❞

of course , his favours never came free . but he found people more often than not generous in their payment , after all miyazawa could offer them .