Relationship Advice For Sale $0.00
I get a lot of relationship questions from friends. Though i’ve been told i give great advice, i’ll never admit to it. To admit to it would be to discredit my own advice. You see, i always remind everyone that no one can tell you what is right for you but you. Why is that? Well thats easy. Its because what you need in your life as a whole is different from what you need in your life at the moment.
Everyone handles things differently and everyone else responds to things that those people handle... differently. We’re all different. My advice to you may not be the same advice i would take myself. The only thing i try to do is to get people to understand themselves. To get to that point when things start to make sense. Maybe thats exhausting all energy trying to get through to someone they care about or leave them. The point is, you wont do either of those things if someone just told you, you have to do things YOUR way to prove to yourself whether something is attainable to you specifically or not.
For example, lets say there is this hot guy named Matt. So this guy Matt is super hot right, but he’s kind if a dick to the bartender on your date. Now, i can tell you right now, he’s a douche and you should walk away but would you do it? I mean, we’re talking about Matt here. He’s an Ex-Marine with a killer body, a jawline that could cut a sheet of paper and a smile that could charm a nun into a life on the road. Who knows what he’s seen overseas, right? Who knows what he’s been through? Why would i know anything about him to tell you he’s no good when you’re the one sitting there with him. Right there, you’ve just justified this dude to yourself when others may not have. Its all about what matters to you. Whats important to you in your significant other. Does he have to be a nice guy? Does he have to be cute? If you cant have both, which are you more likely to compromise for? and are you being honest with yourself.
Its ok to be shallow sometimes, especially if its important to you. You cant deny your needs and wants. You have to be honest with yourself and stick to whats important to you. Its the best way to figure yourself out. Now lets say you and Matt are now on like 3 weeks of dating and he tells you he wants to be serious. Now again, to me 3 weeks isn't enough time to make a commitment to someone but again, this is your life. I’m just here to help you navigate it. Should you say yes to the hot marine or should you pass on the aggressive jerk? If you just got out of a relationship with a dude who honestly acts more like a bitch, cant do shit around the house, and has to call his Dad when he gets a flat tire... 1000000% DATE THE MARINE. He will show you worlds you’ve never seen. You’ll learn about yourself and maybe you’ll soften him up.
Now lets take it 2 years forward. You’ve been together for a while now and things are just falling short. He doesn't express his feeling to you, he doesn't show much affection. He seems distant. He doesn't give you the attention that the new guy at work is giving you but you still cant let go of 2 years of your life. How do you expect me to help you when you’ve already answered your own question. You cant let go of that 2 years so make a decision. Are you going to dig into why he is the way he is and see if you can break through some ground or accept his for who he is and see if this is something you can live with. There is no other option. Fight me on this, i dare you. Just don’t let the new guy at work sway that attempt. your focus needs to be on him. It needs to be on how you can reach 100% understanding of what the rest of your life with him will be. You cant figure that out with outside distractions.
You know whats been the more annoying part for me? Seeing the guys these women stress over settle happily and watching these women assume this speaks to their worth. SO WHAT if he settles for backyard betty, let her have him! What are you going to do, fight for him? He’s not even fighting for himself. Does this mean he thinks you’re not good enough? If it does, are you assuming this one man is able to judge your worth to the rest of the world? Maybe Betty sucks dick better than a shop vac and THATS why he settled, since (lets say) you don’t like giving blow jobs. Does this mean you should just suck his dick even though you hate it??? NO! While removing my very pro-BJ’s opinion on the matter, this is about YOU. This isn’t about her or what she can do. This isnt about him and what he wants. This is about you! What do YOU want? Do you want a guy who NEEDS his dick sucked like Sasha Grey?! Is this something you’re going to be able to “put up with” in the long term? Because let me tell you, Love is not forever.
The key is to find someone you like, not just as a slice of man cake ready to be devoured but as a friend. Can you tell him things you dont tell other people. Can you smell is natural after a long day musk left on his clothes? Can you listen to him chew or slurp soup and not strangle him? Are his breathing sounds something you can fall asleep to?
Once being in-Love runs out, will there be love left? You wont look at him the same, but will you still look at him fondly? After having his kids, can you co-parent peacefully? If so, i say take that chance. Life is about taking risks sometimes, so long as you’re doing it safely. Do what feels right, because after-all, no one can tell you what is right for you but you.
-S
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