My blog

[just-bellerose]

Moscow, Russia 

[pre-party]

[11anothergirl11]

I check my phone constantly hoping I come across your name, hoping that you missed me. Hoping that I’ve been on your mind every single day, as you’ve been on mine.

A.d.c (via 11anothergirl11)

[cutiesmile]

#sunrise #beauty#ocean ahhh so in love with these views (at Downtown Port Hardy.)

[difficult]

[difficult]

[cutiesmile]

Just chilling in the Queen's chair, man she's got a great view lol #roadtrip#family#love#thatviewtho#curiseship#fjords#geirangerfjord#Norway (at Geiranger Fjord)

[cutiesmile]

#takemetothesea #Sweden#lunch#qoutes #love#ocean (at Strömstad)

[cutiesmile]

So I'm laying here in bed after a long and super busy day at work just debating on if I can delete these pics like I know I have to delete most of my pixs but I don't kno if I can delete hers I wish someone can tell me what to do or just do what needs to be done. But on a side note it's official got my loan and paid for my flight I'm out of this place in a few days

[cutiesmile]

So it's like 140am I'm not tired and I'm just constantly thinking about her like what do I do? I wish someone could help me and or tell me what I can do I hate this not having her here in my life.ive been looking at old pics I kno it's in my best interest to delete them all so I can let her go and move on and stop thinking about her, but at the same time I'm still not ready to let her go or even delete The pics what if it's the last time I see her and I'd never have a picot her again I don't want that, mayb I should talk to her or mayb I need to keep away to make things better. Why does everything have to be complicated? Like why can't it be easy and I just have my movie story happy ending and we both fall in love and hold hands till we die I just want to be loved as much as I love back. Well if anyone reads these thanks for listening to me vent

[kissedbythevoid]

[audiovisual-dept]

[cutiesmile]

So as I sit here thinking to myself that this will get easier u will end up forgetting her and losing the love u have for her. But it hasn't I find myself even now wondering what is she doing tonight is shoe working how is work if she is I'm pondering how shes doing is she happier now I'm not in her life at all, I hope she is happier I was the cause of her being so unhappy ans it hurts me still knowing I lost her the perfect girl cause I am a idiot and I didn't know how treat her or communicate with her. I know I'm miserable sad depressed and I feel like a rotten bag of shit. I feel generally lost, not knowing what to do still I am hating life as I know it and I'm finding myself drinking more often than what I should just to try and numb the pain I have caused anyways that's all I need to vent today I may blog some more later tonight once I'm drunk see if anything changed or if I have otherthings to talk about besides the one I let get away.

[cutiesmile]

[gosh]

[anamorphosis-and-isolate]

[cutiesmile]

so as i sit here thinking and drinking, getting drunk cause right now its all i have besides venting on here where not only does no one reads these blogs but it lets go of the  things on my mind. so right now my life is pretty shitty i don’t have anyone really in my life i don’t have a lot of friends the ones i do are all married kids or living no where near me, i just recently lost a bff and as well as i lost a dear friend to me and this has really taken its toll on me, so today was the last straw i hate my life right now and everything about it i have no dating life what so ever haven’t been on a date in so long i feel like i’m a grumpy old man which i hate cause its not me, so i went out on my break today to the bank and got a small loan soo i can book a plane ticket out of the country and try to find myself again. so now i have to tough it out 3 weeks till i leave out of canada :) its the only bright thing about this month