D-Pizzy: Best Rapper Alive

I got fat stacks like the Hutt name Jabba; Bitches flock to me like I’m the fuckin’ Kaaba.

[kirkkeone]

Rabbit Hole... Teto? 🥖🐇❤

[mullet-man05]

you just gotta trust the process. @d-pizzy confirm that this is youcore

[d-pizzy]

@mullet-man05 This is all you. I’m not giving you a chuh on this one dawg.

[spreadassholesdotorg]

[d-pizzy]

@mullet-man05 Chuh

[gay--dog]

punches you but my hand is coated in ibuprofen dust so it immediately cancels out and doesnt hurt

[gay--dog]

❓

[mittland]

this is such amazing trivia. the woman's bathroom hints towards the existence of women in this universe

[girlpatches-deactivated20250530]

(trying any drink) hmm not bad, though it pales in comparison to apple juice

[mullet-man05]

@d-pizzy

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

:D

[cryptile]

Something my dear friend said to me that i think fits

[segamascott]

[d-pizzy]

[heraldic-thunderbolt]

You ever think about what differentiates us from the enemy?

[m3n4c3v35537]

possession of the mandate of heaven, surely

[charl0ttan]

why tf was marx writing whole ass books 😭 he should have been condensing his ideas into easily manageable posts. or fuck maybe even a visual novel

[sistersorrow]

The King of Swords must release the beast within

[despazito]

[ryebreadgf]

my yearly struggle

[d-pizzy]

Fondly remembering an old D&D campaign that fizzled out and being incapable of stopping myself from coming up with new lore which only makes me more sad that it ended.

[homunculus-argument]

I love extremely subtle offhand detail blink-and-you-miss-it foreshadowing that never gets brought up or even noticed by the characters themselves. Like a book starting with description of the protagonist's happy childhood in a cute little secluded village, playing in the woods with the other kids, occasionally finding stone arrangements that look like they were once the foundations of houses, and playing that they are mysterious ancient abandoned ruins even though adults insist that they're nothing, just childish whimsy and nonsense imagination.

Then later on in the story it's revealed that the "war" that happened ten years ago that the protagonist had only learned fragments about was more or less a genocide. There used to be a whole other people here, and the only survivors that weren't killed are the few remnants that managed to escape. The dots are never connected within the story itself. It may take the reader a second reading, all the way from the start of the first book, that the seemingly mundane pieces click together like holy shit.

Those ruins were not ancient, mysterious, abandoned, nor imaginary. And the adults knew all of that, this whole time.

[d-pizzy]

@123rsc @mullet-man05 @lurker-at-thresholds @goldenwolfmidna @fernfetching

The Henges

[d-pizzy]

@lurker-at-thresholds @mullet-man05 @fernfetching @123rsc @goldenwolfmidna

I was originally going to explain just the henges but then I got carried away so here’s the whole campaign.

The Henges were the material components of a 2000 year old contingency ritual designed to turn back time to before Netheril fell. They were keyed to the ancient giant capital city, Voninheim. The map to that location was inscribed in microscopic detail on the lock of hair Jastion kept in the lockett that got stolen by the Xanathar.

Several factions including a group of ancient Dragons and Asmodeus were trying to access it to go back in time to get the apotheosis spell. These dragons had broken the giant Ordening in the hopes that the giants would uncover Voninheim. However to access the key you would’ve had to go to Jastion’s father’s secret study which had a trap that would launch the entire tower into space. To get back to the planet you’d need to plane shift to another plane and then back to the material. You would’ve needed a piece of extra planar metal though. Lucky that Squall had an Acheron blade.

A large amount of the critical henges(the nightsone being one of these) as well as various pieces of the Titan of Death, were being uprooted and stored in Grunggots by Jastion’s uncle in the hopes that he could stop the ritual from being activated(him and Jastion’s Father had traded information about the time travel device to the dragons in exchange for helping stop Tiamat 20 years before and he was now paranoid that they would use that info.)

The body of Karsus was also stirring in its prison in Acheron because it sensed the hopes of mortals that the apotheosis spell would return. This is what was causing goblins and orcs to start turning on each other and start turning good.

Also the Xanathar you met was one of several robot copies of the Xanathar designed to identify possible enemies. The fish was a decoy. However the robot copies of the Xanathar were being dreamed into consciousness by the Xanathar and part of the reason the Xanathar didn’t immediately pursue you is that it was busy dealing with a revolt by the newly conscious Xanathar decoy robot because it was enraged and its particular fish getting disintegrated. Also the Xanathar wanted you alive so that the zhentarim thought that you still had the amulet. Because it had an intellect devoured occupying the mind of the black staff and the Zhentarim were being puppeted by the direct control of asmodeus it knew that the war between the guilds would be too great.

Asmodeus was also planning on using Squall’s favor to trigger a war between the cities on the sword coast to take out Waterdeep and the Xanathar. He also wanted the Titan of Death built to kill the ancient dragon cabal and also so that the Titan of death’s homing systems could lead it back to the Voninheim. The City had been shrouded in a ritual that prevented any being from divining its location.

The event that forced Squall to be exiled from the goliaths was a giant flash of light on a distant mountain coinciding with Squalls trial that served to the goliaths as a sign that squall should be banished. This flash was Jastion’s father fighting an ancient white dragon with rune magic to protect the secret of Voninheim.

[lurker-at-thresholds]

in your professional opinion, any chance your premium white boy could be an egg? fine either way ofc, just curious, i've never seen any cishet white guys on here, closest i've seen is transhet white guys who are stealth irl. so before i start saying that there's at least one cishet white guy on here, i wanna make sure there actually is ykno

You understand that there’s no good answer to this right

[mullet-man05]

dawg why i would be upset with your thoughts? idc if you think i'm secretly trans or gay or neurodivergent or intersex, i know what i am. actually don't tell me if you think i'm ugly that would upset me. other than that the irritation of wanting to know would outweigh even the most out-there theories. so that means you should share with the class.

[lurker-at-thresholds]

I think you seem quite solidly cis but every now and then you say some shit so eggy it gets permanently lodged in the “mullet egg theory” corner of my brain but until that pile of quotes reaches critical mass I’ll leave it alone. But there is evidence I just don’t think it’s enough to convince anyone (myself included) yet. Most of it has plausible alternate explanations in context anyways.

[d-pizzy]

If something were to change in his bio it would be that @mullet-man05 would realize his identity as KILL SIX BILLION DEMONS | The Heir | Wielder of Names | Seeker of Thrones | King of Swords | Breaker of Infinities | Wheel Smashing Lord

[wallofgoats]

they don't show it in the movie but after frankenstein's monster walked into the sunrise he immediately converted to buddhism

[homunculus-argument]

I love extremely subtle offhand detail blink-and-you-miss-it foreshadowing that never gets brought up or even noticed by the characters themselves. Like a book starting with description of the protagonist's happy childhood in a cute little secluded village, playing in the woods with the other kids, occasionally finding stone arrangements that look like they were once the foundations of houses, and playing that they are mysterious ancient abandoned ruins even though adults insist that they're nothing, just childish whimsy and nonsense imagination.

Then later on in the story it's revealed that the "war" that happened ten years ago that the protagonist had only learned fragments about was more or less a genocide. There used to be a whole other people here, and the only survivors that weren't killed are the few remnants that managed to escape. The dots are never connected within the story itself. It may take the reader a second reading, all the way from the start of the first book, that the seemingly mundane pieces click together like holy shit.

Those ruins were not ancient, mysterious, abandoned, nor imaginary. And the adults knew all of that, this whole time.

[d-pizzy]

@123rsc @mullet-man05 @lurker-at-thresholds @goldenwolfmidna @fernfetching

The Henges