Confessions of a rogue military wife

I may dress like a member of the Junior League, but I sure do have a filthier mouth. I think that makes me more fun.

[tastefullyoffensive]

[wwwesty-deactivated20140129]

Omnomnom

[dammitkate-blog]

I NEED THESE PLEASEEEE! 

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[10knotes]

bellagschang:

Multilingual jokes are the best.

[dammitkate-blog]

hugh laurie ftw

[dammitkate-blog]

The bitter truth

Is that there is no real timetable for the valiant males return from the desert.  There's no time frame, no "Maybe here".  And that makes this worse. 

I am not good at single parenting.

I can't keep my house clean, pay every single bill on time, work, manage day to day operations, rent a house across the country and manage special needs kid care all on my own.

No, really, my house is a mess. 

I feel like I am drowning.  And I know there is probably a million more military SO's who feel the.  Exact. Same. Way.

It's exhausting when I call him and he says "I don't know".  It infuriates me.  I'm calling because I need input.  Direction.  Not "Yeah I don't know".

[dammitkate-blog]

I was told that the GI stethoscopes are crap

" You'll be issued one but it will be terrible"

So, nurses, what am I looking for?

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Every time I think of taking the kids somewhere I merely suggest it and they inevitably start fighting and screaming and I'm like "fuck this, I can make a diaper out of duct tape and a kitchen towel.  It's not worth it."

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:) 

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My love just ordered this for me to celebrate my enlistment yesterday.

I feel very loved :)

[anarchymama-deactivated20140816]

This is how it truly is. Sometimes a fuck is thrown in for good measure

[dammitkate-blog]

Lots of cursing in our house as well

[rmartynko]

[laurentheloo]

Leopard purrs are at least 1000 times more satisfying than cat purrs.

[dammitkate-blog]

I'm going to try a newcastle

I've been doing a lot of research and beer is so dicey on the GF status... each person reacts differently.  I'm going to wait for my friend to get here and then I'm going to do some trial and error.

Hmm.

I'll keep you posted.

[summonernoctis]

"No, it doesn’t! It says he can get us back to Earth!"

[ellievhall]

[dammitkate-blog]

ellievhall:

Superhero families take their kids back to school. [source]

d'awww!

[theatlantic]

The Frog That Got Caught In the Crossfire of a Rocket Launch

On Friday evening, NASA’s Minotaur V rocket blasted off from its launchpad at a spaceport in Virginia, carrying the LADEE spacecraft on the first leg of its trip from Earth to the moon. The scene that resulted was fiery. It was inspiring. It was epic. 

It was also, however, not without its casualties. 

The picture above, captured on Friday by one of the remote cameras NASA had set up for the big launch, captured a creature that found itself, alas, caught in the crossfire of humanity’s drive to explore: a frog. A very unfortunate frog. Launch pads, you see, are generally built near marshes and ponds whose water can absorb the flames of a rocket’s ignition. And this little guy was in the wrong place at the very, very wrong time.

Read more. [Image: NASA/Wallops/Mid-Atlantic Regional Spaceport]

[cory-doctorow-deactivated3103201]

so long space frog

[rickiep00h-deactivated20221230]

Ground control to Major Frog Ground control to Major Frog Take your protein pills and put your helmet on  (Ten) Ground control (Nine) to Major Frog (Eight)  (Seven, six) Commencing countdown (Five), polliwog (Four)  (Three, two) Check ignition (One) and may pond (Blastoff) scum be with you  This is ground control to Major Frog, you’ve really made the glade  And the gators want to know whose shirts you wear  Now it’s time to leave the swamp land if you dare  This is Major Frog to ground control, I’m hopping through the door  And I’m croaking in a most peculiar way  And the flies look very different today  Here am I sitting on a lily pad far above the world  Planet Earth is blue and there’s nothing I can do  Though I’m past one hundred thousand miles, I’m feeling very still  And I think my tadpole knows which way to go  Tell my mate I ate her insect lunch, she knows  Ground control to Major Frog, your circuit’s dead, there’s something wrong  Can you ribbit, Major Frog?  Can you ribbit, Major Frog?  Can you ribbit, Major Frog?  Can you…  Here am I sitting on a lily pad far above the Moon  Planet Earth is blue and there’s nothing I can do

I spent entirely too long on what is probably the worst joke on Tumblr.

[itsokaytobesmart]

That song. That is the best thing.

[dammitkate-blog]

This made my night

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Air Medic

Well ok then. 

[beauty-in-the-breakd0wn-deactiv]

‘Fat’ is usually the first insult a girl throws at another girl when she wants to hurt her. I mean, is ‘fat’ really the worst thing a human being can be? Is ‘fat’ worse than ‘vindictive’, ‘jealous’, ‘shallow’, ‘vain’, ‘boring’ or ‘cruel’? Not to me; but then, you might retort, what do I know about the pressure to be skinny? I’m not in the business of being judged on my looks, what with being a writer and earning my living by using my brain… I went to the British Book Awards that evening. After the award ceremony I bumped into a woman I hadn’t seen for nearly three years. The first thing she said to me? ‘You’ve lost a lot of weight since the last time I saw you!’ ‘Well,’ I said, slightly nonplussed, ‘the last time you saw me I’d just had a baby.’ What I felt like saying was, ‘I’ve produced my third child and my sixth novel since I last saw you. Aren’t either of those things more important, more interesting, than my size?’ But no – my waist looked smaller! Forget the kid and the book: finally, something to celebrate! I’ve got two daughters who will have to make their way in this skinny-obsessed world, and it worries me, because I don’t want them to be empty-headed, self-obsessed, emaciated clones; I’d rather they were independent, interesting, idealistic, kind, opinionated, original, funny – a thousand things, before ‘thin’. And frankly, I’d rather they didn’t give a gust of stinking chihuahua flatulence whether the woman standing next to them has fleshier knees than they do. Let my girls be Hermiones, rather than Pansy Parkinsons.

J.K. Rowling  

(via likejameslovedlily)

this is personally in my list of things you must reblog when you see it

(via potternyc)

This is a very important quote.

(via witch-boots)

Always reblog this.

(via jewlesthemagnificent)

Ahhhhhmazing

[dammitkate-blog]

I'm in

Super high test scores.  Flew through medical.

Good evening, America, my name is Kate and I am your newest piece of government property.