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[dancinsunray]

FREE PHONES

if anyone in in the austin area, come into cedar park and we can save you money AND get you some free phones

[dancinsunray]

so i started selling phones

and these are everyday conversations we have with customers

    this lady has an iPhone 6s and doesn't know how to work it.

“what is this pop up on my phone?”

“thats a software update ma’am. whens the last time you updated your phone?”

“whats an update?”

we sent her to starbucks for free wifi so she could update.

     this man dropped his phone at a construction site

“hi i dropped my phone and now i cant use it”

“let me take a look at that”. part of the screen is missing and the rest is shattered. “do you have insurance”

“no. thats a waste of money”

“then sir, you’re going to have to go to a repair center and schedule and appointment or we can get you a new phone in store. these are the deals were having on new phones”

“but i want this one. cant you just fix the screen?”

“no sir. youll have to go to a repair center”

“but you sell phones right?”

“yes sir”

“cant you just give me a new one?”

this went on for 15 more minutes before he finally called the care center...they told him the same thing

    dudes hungover

“i uhhhh. i changed my password and i cant remember it”

“were you drunk?”

“yes”

“is your phone backed up to the cloud or on a computer?”

“no. i dont want the government stealing my info!”

“then youll have to go to the apple store. we cant unlock it without a backup here”

“BUT APPLE IS THE GOVERNMENT!”

he has an iphone

THATS ALL FOR TODAY. but its only 10:30

[dancinsunray]

This is the greatest thing I've ever seen on a website. And I've seen porn #dominos #rockingit #newfavpizza

[dancinsunray]

Halfway gone but all the way delicious! #thesteepingroom #tomatoandcoconut #loveithere @thesteepingroom

[dancinsunray]

@thesteepingroom ! Favorite lunch spot! #teatime☕️ #domain #3rdtimethisweek

[dancinsunray]

Work has me looking run down but feeling great! #workflow #fakelashesday1 #icantblink #orwearmyglasses #imblindaftho

[dancinsunray]

My baby is all worn out #kitty #socute #snuggles #snuggletime

[dancinsunray]

#lovehim❤️ #baegoals #forever

[dancinsunray]

Rainy day snuggles #mybaby #rain #theskyiscrying #butimnot #keepmymakeupon

[dancinsunray]

WHOS PLAYING????

[heathens-and-kings]

“I want to speak to a manager,” the middle-aged woman said in her stern I-used-to-be-a-soccer-mom-ten-years-ago voice, looking down at me over the top of her Gucci reading glasses.

A wicked grin split across my face and the gates of Hell opened up behind me, releasing a gust of hot wind that whipped my apron around my body and forced the woman to shield her face. Demons came forth, dancing around in flames with songs of, “She wants to speak to a manager. Did you hear that? She wants to speak to a manager!” before erupting into earsplitting shrieks of laughter, none louder than my own cackling.

I took in the woman’s look of utter horror before my eyes rolled back into my head and I growled,

“I am the manager.”

[owawaaa]

a thing for one of my favorite posts on this site

[lickmetilllicecreammmm]

This is the best post I swear

[southerncharmvirgo-deactivated2]

my absolute favorite.

[kiss-my-asymptote]

someone who has never seen Fairy Tail, explain this gif

[dancinsunray]

anti-fuck boy magicc?

[dancinsunray]

You: i woke up with a busted vessel in my eye from rubbing them yesterday. allergies suck

Stranger: Fuuuuuuck man that's not good

You: all the damn trees trying to have sex and shit

Stranger: hey hey, if you water an apple tree with apple juice, technically, arent you feeding it the blood of its children?

You: ........

Stranger: did i go too far

You: are you a psycopath? or do you just use tumblr

You: wait. nevermind theyre the same thing

[dancinsunray]

My dog isnt allowed on the bed

and he knows it. sometimes when im gone i know he gets on my bed because i see him walk out of my room all ashamed and shit. Anyways, i got home from work today and couldnt find my dog ANYWHERE! i was calling his name and everything. i finally walk into my room (i didnt think of looking there because the door was closed) and as i open thee door my dog attacks me (hes bigger than i am, literally) and starts whimpering. i look at the otherside of my door and its all scratched up and my blinds are torn on my window, the place looks like hell flew by. the little fucker got himself LOCKED IN MY ROOM WHILE I WAS GONE! and i have to buy a new door....

[catsdogsgifs]

More Cute Cats

[dancinsunray]

coot lizard

i hug lizard

this pillow sucks

good night lizard

[dancinsunray]

i wake up to my boyfriend saying “ ive gotta go to work baby!” i get up to say bye and as hes walking out the door, “oh btw, ive got a surprise for you when i come home”. 

my entire family knows what it is, and are teasing me with vague hints...all damn day. 

[iphthime-deactivated20200515]

EVERYONE GO TO LOSER.COM

STOP WHATEVER YOU’RE DOING AND GO TO LOSER.COM THERE’S NO TIME TO WASTE!!! IT MIGHT BE GONE SOON!!

[dancinsunray]

this is the epitome of funny