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new americana;

@dante-porter

Dante Porter columnist || 21 || taken writer of the controversial and destructive. no, I don't give a fuck if you don't like what I have to say.

987 posts

Jul 31, 2019

text: Dante

petra: Wanna become my sugar daddy and let me live my life sleeping and looking hot?

Dante: Don't think I would be a very good sugar daddy.

Jul 31, 2019

text: Dante

Petra: Great.

Petra: So I suppose I can't put off figuring my shit out any longer.

Dante: Nope, sadly not.

Jul 31, 2019

text: Dante

Petra: I'd be more hurt, but I planned on asking you to take Val for his walk when you get home.

Dante: Yeah, I can do that babe.

Jul 31, 2019

text: Dante

Petra: Liar.

Dante: You know I do.

Jul 31, 2019

text: Dante

Petra: That's mean.

Dante: love you

Jul 31, 2019

text: Dante

Petra: Excuse you. It's very true.

Dante: Noppppeee

Jul 31, 2019

text: Dante

Petra: Not sure how, seeing as I am perfect.

Dante: I love you, completely and truly, but no, babe. no.

Jul 31, 2019

text: Dante

Petra: Well if we ever find ourselves faced with my parents, you're welcome to throw me under the bus.

Dante: Oh trust me, I will. With pleasure.

Jul 31, 2019

text: Dante

Petra: Sure, but I'd be fine.

Dante: So willing to throw me under the bus. Starting to question the love here.

Jul 31, 2019

text: Dante

Petra: I mean, he'd have to deal with it if we rolled up with a dog.

Dante: It would only turn into pain and suffering for me.

Jul 31, 2019

text: Dante

Petra: I promised him you'd bring Val for a visit soon.

Petra: So I think we should get your dad a dog.

Dante: I think we should ask pops if he's okay with it first.

Jul 31, 2019

text: Dante

Petra: So I thought your dad was going to cry when I came for Val

Dante: To be fair, you are taking his favorite child away now.

Jul 29, 2019

text: Dante

Spencer: I am keeping the dog though.

Dante: petra would murder you

Jul 29, 2019

text: Dante

Spencer: Then you better not fuck it up, kid.

Dante: Trying hard not to.

Jul 29, 2019

text: Dante

Spencer: Good, I hope not. You seem... really happy with her.

Dante: I am. I'm really happy with her.

Jul 29, 2019

text: Dante

Spencer: Well, Duh.

Spencer: So if you guys ever break up, we're keeping Petra.

Dante: Sounds reasonable. But we're not gonna break up

Jul 29, 2019

text: Dante

Spencer: As a thank you for watching the dog. Turns out you are dating someone who is 100 percent more thoughtful than you

Dante: Well, duh.

new americana; @dante-porter - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag