Not A Professional

Funny stuff

[theonion]

Amid a campaign aimed at improving the aesthetics of previously neglected public spaces, the team behind a new beautification initiative admitted Thursday to feeling impeded by the city’s commitment to using only local artists. “Seeing the quality of some of these pieces, I’m beginning to worry that we vastly over-estimated the amount of artistic talent here in Bloomington,” said project coordinator Tim Mackey, examining a sculpture that consisted of a single bent piece of scrap metal and had been funded through a $25,000 capital improvement grant.

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[friendlyfatigue]

remember when linguini brought a rat he found back to his apartment and got all embarrassed and was like it’s not much. to the rat

[dogpuppy]

[theonion]

Imploring their colleagues across the aisle to be mindful of how the highly charged language might elevate national tensions, congressional Republicans urged Democrats Tuesday to tone down the rhetoric they used to quote President Donald Trump verbatim. “Temperatures are running high, and the last thing we need are hotheaded Democrats spewing hateful, inflammatory statements sourced directly from the president’s speeches,” said Speaker of the House Mike Johnson (R-LA), adding that there was already enough political violence in the country without stoking it further by taking words right out of the president’s mouth and repeating them in public. 

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[theonion]

[mevil]

[rottencore]

This post keeps making me cry laughingg

[theonion]

Striking down the judicial precedent that established the legal supremacy of right over wrong more than two centuries ago, the U.S. Supreme Court on Wednesday overturned Right v. Wrong.

The landmark reversal—a bitterly contested 5-4 decision that has been widely praised by murderers, rapists, bigots, usurers, and pro-wrong advocates nationwide—nullifies all previously lawful forms of right and makes it very difficult for Americans to make ethical decisions or be generally decent human beings without facing criminal charges.

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[dragon-in-a-fez]

apparently the cops arrested fuckin Bicycles Georg today

[dragon-in-a-fez]

someone found this guy's house on google maps and I'm screaming

[pileofknives]

[thingsfromthedirt]

warming carafe with a stained glass pattern (ca. late 50s-early 60s)

[danton-timbercliffe]

How much lead did boomers consume

[crowcaws]

Incredible events unfolding on reddit

[crowcaws]

[crowcaws]

I would die for Tessa. I would find her 200 toothbrushes.

[crowcaws]

So it looks like Tessa has been using these veggietales toothbrushes for ages, but has misplaced the stash.

[theonion]

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[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

ill spend my twenties investigating the healing properties of salt i dont know about you guys

[protectspock]

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

excuse me

[protectspock]

Sorry op. That's my friend the Salt Vampire from the Star Trek episode "The Man Trap" which first aired in 1966. Blessings be upon you.

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

its just i dont feel blessed by its presence is all. sending love your way

[throughtimeandstarlight]

[charlesoberonn]

This post goes around Tumblr every year, and it’s always true. There’s never been an uneventful or boring January.

[oasisbreakup]

[shiftythrifting]

two baffling finds from a local thift store in the PNW. i swear i stood there staring at that pillow for a minute straight repeating "riffard......" to myself trying to make sense of it. and as for the embroidery... also no clue 🤷🏻‍♂️

Are you a butt ho?

y

n

Riffard

Voting ended onJan 17

[moleshow]