darren r.

[darrenr]

life audit

Yesterday, during our new series, “Disciplines of the Spirit,”  I invited our community to take  a “ life audit.”  The invitation was and is to graciously observe oneself without judgment in order to honestly assess ones life.  The goal is to identify the habits in your life keeping you from being who you were created to be, and the distractions in your life keeping you from being a passionate follower of Jesus. This is away of being honest with yourself, your spouse and friends, as well as God.  It is important to understand that the small things are the big things. As you begin to recognize the habits that are forming your life, allow change to happen slowly.  Choose to make small steps in the right direction.  

Life Audit Questions 1. Who has God created you to be?  What is the vision for your life? 2. Where do you spend your time? 3. Where do you spend your money? 4. Who are the people you spend the most time and energy with? 5. What are the activities that fill your schedule? 6. What consumes your thoughts throughout the day? 7. What kind of food do you regularly eat? How does the food you eat impact the way you feel?  What about what you drink? 8. What other habits keep you from being who you are created to be?

As you answer these questions remember the first step is to become aware of who you are becoming through observing what you are doing.  Unintentional habits shape you.  Name those habits.  The second step is to begin to replace old habits with counter-formational disciplines, which we will discuss more next week.

[darrenr]

Yesterday. 081314.

I was in my home in the middle of the day when I heard a woman crying outside the window saying to herself, “Nobody loves me, nobody cares!” I opened the window to see where this voice was coming from. She was standing out on the balcony on the fourth floor of an apartment building next to our house.  She didn’t see me looking up at her out the window. 

She continued to cry hysterically and she shook her head as if she was trying to convince herself what she was saying was a lie.  She leaned far over the railing and then began to slowly lift her right leg over the railing as she continued to cry, “nobody loves me, no body cares!”

I realized at that moment she was serious.

She was about to jump. 

I shouted from the window panicked, “What are you doing?” “Hey, you!”

I ran immediately from the restroom out the door of my house passing my wife, as she tried to stop me and asked, “what’s going on?” “Someone is going to jump,” I replied!

I ran out to the front of our house and I looked up to the apartment in fear as her body leaned over the railing and she straddled the railing with her legs, contemplating whether or not she was going to do what it looked like she was going to do.

I yelled up at her desperate, panicked, trying to communicate with logic and reason, “Hey you, what are you doing, get back… get down from there, let’s talk!!!”

“Nobody loves me!!”  She said with tears in her eyes, “Nobody cares.”

I shouted back, “What’s your name? I care, I care!”  “My name’s Darren!” Thinking that if I could get her to tell me her name our sense of being strangers would disappear and maybe she would think that I do care.

She leaned further over the edge and was shaking.  She was about to jump. In a moment of panic I tried to hop the fence below her.  I thought maybe I could stand between her and the ground. Maybe I could break her four story fall.  It didn’t make sense.

People began to shout, “call 911!”

Alex came outside and began to shout up at her, “It’s going to be okay, hey wait a second, wait, wait!”

I ran inside her complex, sprinting up the stairs wondering if I could break down her door and pull her down!  I got to the top of the stairs faster than I’ve ever ran before in my life.  I ran into an open door, her apartment, no one was on the balcony.

I was too late I thought.  She jumped. Did she jump?

I was in her apartment, bright colors painted on the wall, nice furniture and neatly designed paintings hanging on the wall.  

“Hello?”  

She came out of the back room.

Her make up was running down her face, along with streams of tears.  She was distraught, embarrassed, shaking and incoherent.  Saying what she said while she straddled the railing, but this time without the fight in her, without the urgency, she spoke with a softness, she spoke as if she was defeated.

“Nobody cares, nobody loves me!”

I said, “Hi, my name’s Darren. I’m your neighbor.  I care about you and God loves you! What’s going on? what happened, do you want to talk to me?”  

I was terrified. Shaking. My heart was racing and my mind was lost. 

She looked me in the eyes and said “Nobody loves me!” For a split second, I believed her.

She was so torn and broken up inside. Ready to kill herself for a belief that has plagued our society and culture. She was a soul tortured by the deep longing for love and acceptance. The intimate knowledge of love and being loved is a rare gift.  She then stared at me as if I was the one that caused the pain and then put on an eerie smile as she looked through me and walked closer to me.  I backed out slowly trying to get her to talk.

She shared her name and said, “God bless you,” as she shut the door.

She was alone.

I didn’t know what to do.

It happened so fast.

Then a police officer walked right up to me and knocked on the door.  I found myself walking down the stairs that I had ran up in a daze.  Walking down the lonely staircase, a dark corridor, thinking of what almost happened.

Thinking of what she said, thinking of the image of a young woman yelling to no one and everyone at the edge of her life, “nobody loves me!”

It was over in a few minutes. But I will never forget the experience.  

The woman's face and the desperation in her voice. She was convinced.  She believed nobody loved her.  

How many neighbors do you think feel the same way?  I can’t help but think of what Jesus said is the greatest commandment, “Love God and love your neighbor as yourself.”  

Love your neighbor.  

Loving your neighbor isn’t some passive, or convenient bumper sticker we say when we talk about our faith to other christians in the world.  To love is to act.  To love is to decide how we ought to behave in a world that is hurting.

Love is preemptive.  Love is intentional. 

Love is the solution to the worlds problems.  Only if that love is defined by an active pursuit of all that is good, true and right in the world.

My neighbor needed to be loved.

She needed love.

She needs love.

She was about to jump, because she didn’t know Love.

[darrenr]

connect

Be honest with yourself for a moment. You are distracted. You probably have a hard time sitting still, or doing one thing at a time. When you are waiting for something you are scrolling, browsing, flipping, checking and texting. You don’t listen well, you forget things, sometimes while driving you wonder how you got to the destination because you don’t remember the trip.  When in conversation with others you rarely make eye contact because you are often looking down at your phone, a TV or a computer screen. Trying to make a connection.   Everything is instant and accessible, at all times, without boundaries.  Your devices have become a means to be available to everyone in your life at the expense of those in your presence.  If you were to be even more honest with yourself, you would probably recognize that in your distractedness you’re covering something up, ignoring thoughts and avoiding feelings. 

Your condition worsens with every distracted attempt.  

You fill yourself with emptiness. 

Deep down inside you are longing for something more, searching for something deeper and hoping for greater meaning. You have these desires for a purpose. You want to be touched, you want to be known and you want to be loved.

You are, in fact, designed for connectedness.  

Real, honest, undistracted connectedness.

[darrenr]

a different kind of Christmas story. part 2

Joseph travels hundreds of miles to go back to his hometown, this means he doesn't work on his families land, it means he was working for a days wage, he lived where  he could find work.  If someone left their land it was almost certainly because of some form of debt, famine or war.  In other words, when we read the story of Joseph and Mary traveling hundreds of miles in the last trimester of Mary’s pregnancy we read about Joseph and Mary “[representing] the thousands of rootless people in ancient Jewish Palestine cut loose from their ancestral lands and villages by roman conquest or by indebtedness.” Mary and Joseph are lining up to enlist as subjects of the Roman Empire paying tribute to Caesar in the form of taxes!

The Christmas story has something to do with a displaced, pregnant-teenage day laborers-from the middle of nowhere, traveling hundreds of miles to pay tribute to a foreign military super power who’s king is called the son of god, who’s empire is called ‘salvation!’

This story is about justice, this is about how the world really works, this is about God doing something about the situation.

We still aren’t ready to answer the question and to further our understanding let’s talks about ‘a son,’and ‘mangers.’

“6While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, 7and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no guest room available for them.”

The story goes on to reveal that Mary gives birth to ‘a son,’ the Son of God, God’s Salvation - Jesus, the long awaited Messiah, King and Lord, in a barn and then places her firstborn in a ‘manger’ or what we would call a feeding trough.  Have you ever been asked by your mom, “were you born in a barn?”  Well, Jesus was.   There was no guest room available because everyone and their mother was traveling to take this census.  The story of Jesus is the story of a King being born in a barn.  The God of the universe lying in a feeding trough.

The story goes on then we have shepherds, angels and an announcement!

“8And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. 9An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified.”

There were these shepherds in a nearby field.  Shepherds, not daytime watch shepherds but the midnight shift shepherds who sleep together outside as they watch over sheep.  Watching sheep in the field wasn’t the cleanest job and it didn’t require a lot of education at the time and to be sleeping in the fields meant you were a bit of an outcast, a rough group, a different kind of group.  

Yet, the angels appear to them. Why would messengers of God, Heavenly Hosts, appear to these outcasts, these random dudes sleeping in the fields?  What’s the significance of this?  They’re not sleeping in homes. They’re sleeping with sheep.  What does this part of the story tell us about God? What kind of God announces the arrival of the new king and Messiah to a bunch of shepherds?  Wouldn’t you go announce this to some prophets or priests in the temple, or some great politician, or royal family, or at least people with some potential?  

But it’s not that kind of story, because he’s not that kind of God.   This story goes to them, it involves those kinds of people.  The ones working in the fields, living on the streets.  Those that you wouldn’t think to include.  Those who don’t usually get the invite or hear the news first.  This Christmas story is about those kinds of people hearing it first!  The angels announce to these shepherds in a nearby field something you wouldn’t see coming.

“10But the angel said to them, ‘Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. 11Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. 12This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.’

13Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying,

14’Glory to God in the highest heaven, and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.’

15When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, ‘Let’s go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about.’ 16So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was lying in the manger. 17When they had seen him, they spread the word concerning what had been told them about this child, 18and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them. 19But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart. 20The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told.”

“Good News…Great Joy for all people!”

Good News gets translated from the Greek word Gospel and a word was used to describe the birth of Caesar Augustus. It was a word designated to describe what would happen when a Roman army conquers another territory.  An announcement about a military victory.  

And all people, like everyone, everyone.  All people implied everyone.  Not just the elite, not just those in charge.  You see 90% of the population in Jewish Palestine were peasants, those that worked on the land and lived day by day.  The majority of the people were not included in a Gospel (good news) announcement by the Roman Empire.  And usually good news involved some sort of taxation and a forced foreign occupation.

The angels continued…

“A Savior has been born…

he’s the Messiah,

the Lord…”

Wait a minute, do you remember what we talked about when we talked about Empires and Land?

A Savior? Rome already had a savior,  Messiah? (another word for King) Rome already had a king. A Lord? Rome already had a lord.  Peace?  Rome already brought “peace.”

The announcement of Jesus’ birth is a direct challenge to the Roman world, a subversive confrontation of a different kind of Good News. It’s a different kind of story being told.  

The story of Christmas is a story about God doing something new in the world. God giving birth to a new story.  The Christmas story is about a different kind of Savior, a different kind of Lord, a different kind of Peace, a different kind of Kingdom. A kingdom marked not by domination and conquest, but of sacrifice and love.

This story tells us about a different kind of God. A God who sends his only Son, a God who enters back into the story of humanity, a God who keeps his promises, a God who includes those you would never include.

The Christmas story isn’t just about a nativity scene of a beautiful glowing Mary and a peaceful, smiling baby Jesus or donkeys and camels looking on majestically next to Joseph (who just helped his wife give birth in a barn).  Christmas isn’t about decorated trees, presents, santa’s little helpers or whether things are pagan or not.

You see the reason Luke uses the exact same words used for caesar is this… in the roman world the romans didn't care if you worshiped other gods, you just had to include Caesar as one of your deities.  By the time Luke writes this Gospel, using the language he does, he’s making a statement, you can’t have two lords or two saviors,  so which one is it? Caesar or Jesus?

The Christmas story is about what kind of God you worship, what kind of Lord you serve and what kind of world you choose to live in.

A world with land and empires, rulers and kings, with outcast and elite, rich and poor, a world that you think works a certain way and then yet, kings are born in barns and Saviors are found lying in feeding troughs.

When we make Christmas a polite holiday, full of busy-ness, debt, distractions and consumer oriented shopping.  We tend to miss the point.  We miss what this provocative story represents.  

This Christmas story is about those who’ve been kicked around.  It’s for those who are desperate, the needy.  Those that don’t have place to call home and that can’t get ahead, or catch a break.  It’s about those sleeping on the streets, the poor, the outcast, the tired and the lost. The lonely. Those who are far off.  Those who have ever cried out, "God where are you?" Christmas is God’s way of saying, I’m here.

This Christmas story reorients our lives to the wonderful God who is with us, who challenges the way the world works and offers us another way to live.  The Christmas story is an invitation but most of all an announcement to the world,  that you too are included, but you will have to choose.  

What’s our response?  

First, we choose who we will worship.  There’s no secret, there are plenty of caesars today demanding our worship, they are disguised as Self, Pleasure, Sex, Money, Power, Jobs, Relationships, Stuff, Security, Comfort and the list goes on so insert your Caesar here…

Then we do what the shepherds did return to our normal lives, the nearby hills and tell those we know about what God has done and show the world there’s another way to live

A new way of life... not revenge but forgiveness, not accumulation but generosity, not control but surrender, not just loving those who love you but loving everyone, we show the world joy in suffering, the way of sacrifice, service and humility, we show the world kindness and love. 

In our 9-5, our day to day, to our frustrating roommates and coworkers, to our families, on our date nights, at our schools.  

We simply return to the ordinary places of our life and reveal God to the world!

[darrenr]

a different kind of Christmas story. part 1

This Christmas, as you sit around the fireplace with your decorated trees listening to Sufjan Stevens Christmas album, or when you are watching ‘Elf’ while wrapping presents and drinking eggnog, take some time to remember what this season is really all about.  

And as cliché’, or religious as you think that might be, maybe it’s time to actually think about what kind of Jesus the Scriptures actually talk about.  Nowadays people talk about Jesus in all sorts of different ways, often making it really difficult to know exactly who we are talking about when we use the name Jesus.

When media focuses on whether Santa is white or black, when stores begin to decorate and preview commercials for this “consumer holiday” the day after Halloween and when churches are more concerned about Christmas trees being “pagan,” are fighting to say “Merry Christmas” rather than “Happy Holidays” and teaching series with a titles like, “5 ways to survive family this Christmas” and when we go into debt to provide presents for loved ones it would be easy for us to miss what Christmas is all about.

So, what is Christmas all about about?   

To answer, let’s first talk about ‘land’and ‘empires.’ 

There’s a small piece of land in the Middle East.  What’s unique about this land is that throughout history this tiny piece of land directed the trade flow between different parts of the world.   If Africa wanted to trade with Europe it would have to go through this tiny piece of land.  If Asia wanted to trade with Africa it would go through this piece of land.  If Europe wanted to trade with Asia it would have to, yes, go through this land. If you wanted to control the trade between nations, this land was a valuable piece of property.

This land was known as Israel.

Throughout history, this territory was occupied by foreign nations and empires. Lots of them. 

The Egyptians, Persians, Babylonians, Assyrians, Greeks, Seleucids. 

Everybody and their brother marched through Israel and occupied it at one point.

But time and time again, the Israelites would protest and revolt against foreign powers and rulers coming into to their land.  Every time another nation or empire came into Israel it was a harsh reminder of the oppression they were under as slaves in Egypt.  At one point in history the Jewish community from the north were forced to leave their land in exile.  During this period prophets emerged and promised a time when God would come back and defeat the enemies of Israel and bring liberation and freedom to all.  Their God, after all, was the one true God. He was the creator God of the universe and through him their nation would be a nation for all other nations to be blessed and through whom healing, justice, peace and shalom would be fully realized once and for all. This would be done through their God acting in human history.  This would be an act of God. He would send a servant, a savior to orchestrate these events.

But it didn’t happen at the close of the Old Testament.  Promises were unfulfilled as those who were in exile returned to their land.  Healing, justice, peace and shalom were not fully realized at the close of the Old Testament and many years of waiting began.  This was what the Israelites were waiting for, God to show up and do what he promised to do.

Eventually, another military super power, an empire like never before, came and conquered Israel.  60 years before the birth of Jesus, General Pompey conquered Jerusalem with force and established the Roman Empire’s territory.  

The Roman Empire was unlike any previous empires.  The history of the empire was one of brutality and bloodshed. Their armies were unstoppable and the Emperors were seen as divine.  

When Julius Caesar was betrayed by the senate and murdered, his adopted Son Octavian took revenge for his death and sought justice for his Father.  A long and bloody civil war erupted throughout the empire, until Octavian defeated Mark Antony 31 years before Jesus was born bringing what was known as “peace” through out the Roman Empire.  This was called the Pax-Romana.  Peace was brought through bloodshed.

Octavian was celebrated as the new emperor.  He was given the name, Augustus Caesar, or Caesar Augustus.  His name meant the “illustrious one”, or “majestic one”. He was considered the “savior” of the world and his empire was called “salvation.”  His birthday became a national holiday and a Roman poet named Virgil described Caesar Augustus’ birth as the long-awaited new age of prosperity and peace.   Monuments were constructed around the empire from England to Africa the inscriptions read:

“Good news! We have an Emperor! Justice, Peace, Security, and Prosperity are ours forever! The Son of God has become King of the World!”  He was known as the “son of god” and “the king of the world” years before Jesus was born.

This empire occupying this land had a king named Caesar, he was considered the high priest, the son of god, the bringer of peace, he was called lord, his birth inaugurated the golden age of peace and news about him was called “gospel.”

So, when we talk about Christmas, we need to remember the history of this piece of land and the empire that occupied it at the time of Jesus’ birth.

Now let’s read the story of Jesus’ birth.

Luke 2

“1 In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. 2 (This was the first census that took place while Quirinius was governor of Syria.) 3 And everyone went to their own town to register.”

Okay, to answer our question let’s talk bout “those days” and “census.”

When we read ‘in those days Caesar Augustus’ we need to think about the implications of what ‘those days’ were like.  The Roman Empire had brought “peace” to the world through a sword, well, really through one massive army.  Everywhere the Romans went, every town, village and city they conquered they would bring an army and demand submission.  They would hold a sword to your throat and you would swear allegiance to the empire by saying “Caesar is Lord.”  Then they would tax you.  

Throughout the Roman occupation of Israel protests and revolts broke out time and time again.  And every single time the Romans would win.  They were really good at winning.  If you didn’t confess, pay tribute or submit to their Caesar you would be killed and many times crucified.  Around 4BCE three and half miles from where Jesus grew up, near Nazareth in a place called Sepphoris there was a revolt and at the end of it, the Romans crucified nearly 2000 Jewish men.

2000 Jewish men hanging on crosses and poles. 

Imagine “those days.”  This is what Roman Peace looked like. This is what Empire looked like.Peace through domination, forced occupation and fear.  Thousands hanging on a cross.

When we talk about those days, we are talking about those types of days.  Now, a census was about counting people and counting people was about taxes and taxes was about collecting money from everyone that lived in the empire.

More people meant more money. (mo' money, mo' problems as Biggie would say) More money meant a bigger army.  A bigger army meant more power. More power to the Romans meant more world conquest. More conquest meant more “Roman Peace.”

This is the backdrop of the Christmas Story.  Empire, occupied land, Roman peace, a lord and king sitting on a throne thousands of miles away away from Israel demanding his subjects to be counted.  Are you begging to see the implications of this story?  Next in the text we read, “from Nazareth to Bethlehem.”

“4 So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. 5He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child.”

The Gospel writer Luke, in his previous chapter already told the story of an angel coming to Mary to tell her about what was about to happen.  She would give birth to a son, he would be the holy one of God, the Son of God, the Son of the Most High who would sit on David’s throne and his kingdom would never end, his name was to be Jesus, meaning God’s Salvation.  We learn in the previous chapter that Mary is a teenage peasant nobody from the middle of nowhere (Nazareth) with no family history or real significance except her willingness to go along with God working in her life, and she just so happens to be engaged to Joseph.

And now Joseph and Mary going ‘from Nazareth to Bethlehem.’  Bethlehem is where Joseph is from and we know he comes from the line of King David, and David’s city was Bethlehem, so this is where Joseph’s family is from.  “In a traditional agrarian society, the vast majority of the peasants would have been working their ancestral lands and supporting the ruling groups with a portion of their produce.” 

So, why doesn’t Joseph live in Bethlehem anymore?

We will answer that tomorrow. part 2.

[darrenr]

O NIGHT DIVINE

[darrenr]

Aren’t you, like me, hoping that some person, thing, or event will come along to give you that final feeling of inner well-being you desire? Don’t you often hope: ‘May this book, idea, course, trip, job, country or relationship fulfill my deepest desire.’ But as long as you are waiting for that mysterious moment you will go on running helter-skelter, always anxious and restless, always lustful and angry, never fully satisfied. You know that this is the compulsiveness that keeps us going and busy, but at the same time makes us wonder whether we are getting anywhere in the long run. This is the way to spiritual exhaustion and burn-out. This is the way to spiritual death.

― Henri J.M. Nouwen, Life of the Beloved: Spiritual Living in a Secular World

[darrenr]

“Over the years, I have come to realize that the greatest trap in our life is not success, popularity, or power, but self-rejection. Success, popularity, and power can indeed present a great temptation, but their seductive quality often comes from the way they are part of the much larger temptation to self-rejection. When we have come to believe in the voices that call us worthless and unlovable, then success, popularity, and power are easily perceived as attractive solutions. The real trap, however, is self-rejection. As soon as someone accuses me or criticizes me, as soon as I am rejected, left alone, or abandoned, I find myself thinking, "Well, that proves once again that I am a nobody." ... [My dark side says,] I am no good... I deserve to be pushed aside, forgotten, rejected, and abandoned. Self-rejection is the greatest enemy of the spiritual life because it contradicts the sacred voice that calls us the "Beloved." Being the Beloved constitutes the core truth of our existence.”

Henri Nouwen

[darrenr]

My Son. EZRA LION ROUANZOIN 7 pounds 9 ounces #ezralion #thankful 11.18.13

[darrenr]

Who wore it best? #belly #39weeks #ezralion @alxrnzn

[darrenr]

#thepete recording for our Christmas services - love this worship leader @thegardenchurch #xmas2013

[darrenr]

Soul care.

[darrenr]

Trumpets. Spanish. Prayer +Worship. Dodgeball+Potlucks. Love this amazing community. #thankful #thegardenlb @thegardenchurch

[darrenr]

We start a new series today @thegardenchurch #liberation -There are over 2200 references in the Bible that discuss money and possessions….3 times as many references to money as to love   7 times as many references to money as to prayer   8 times as many references to money as to belief   Comprises 15% of God’s Word   1/5 of Jesus’ teaching was on money and possessions   17 of 38 parables Jesus talked more about money than any single topic besides the Kingdom of God. Liberation is about living with our money, our stuff, our jobs and our lives in a way that is consistent with our discipleship to Jesus.

[darrenr]

with everything.

When we look around us, some will see an inheritance of despair.

A past of unfulfilled dreams.  Unmet expectations. Vacant streets.

  It’s said that when you lose everything you discover what really matters.

And it’s those who sit alone amidst the ashes of what once was.

Those without the company of hope.

Those without a place.

They suffer [our] fractured story.

  When we lose everything,

All we have are those around us.

When we stop looking at what’s missing,

We find meaning in what we share.

  We learn

our journey isn’t about where we go,

but, who we are with on the way.

  And love is best,

given away.

When we love,

We find purpose.

We find place.

We find ourselves,

with everything

[robbellcom]

Click Here to Read Part 1

Part 2: Flood

Let’s talk about floods. Because the ancients did. The Sumerians told flood stories, the Mesopotamians told flood stories, the Babylonians told flood stories-stories about water and it’s destructive power to wipe out towns, cities,...

[darrenr]

The Drum Major Instinct

The full speech here: http://mlk-kpp01.stanford.edu/index.php/encyclopedia/documentsentry/doc_the_drum_major_instinct/ On 4 February 1968, Martin Luther King,&