An Independent roleplay blog for Alastor from Hazbin Hotel. 25+ roleplayers only.
As penned by Max 🦌 30+ he/him.
WHAT TO EXPECT
Roleplay with 100-500 word replies, third-person, past tense.
Replies as promptly as I can provide them. I'm an uncle aged man with a full-time job and adhd please have mercy.
Generally canon-compliant, but I do have my flair and headcanons! That's what makes roleplay fun. I will also do AUs, and try to fit into your verse. We do whatever is fun here.
RULES
Roleplay is for 25+ adults only for my comfort, writer is 30+.
Minors DO NOT interact! Be safe, and do not talk to random adults on the internet.
No bigotry or hateful shit, on any level towards anybody.
Not a bellhop, so don’t give me your baggage. This means do not come to me with excessive or consistent negativity or discourse, in regard to the show and in general. I’m here for fun. Venting happens and I don’t mind it, but I’ve had people make me their person to rely on for it when I don’t have bandwidth and I can’t do it again.
I will not write threads involving non-con or incest. Just a personal thing about me, this ain't about you.
Any other triggering content will be tagged and put under a read more if explicit or severe. There will likely be gore, blood, violence and usfw (which would be tagged #usfw).
Because of the nature of this blog, I will not interact with characters under 18.
OCs, Aus, canon divergents, non-hellaverse characters are all perfectly lovely and may interact.
Multiples ahoy! I'm not exclusive, and I multi-ship.
I AM VERY SHY!!! I am so sorry. I started this blog to be less skittish but I'm still working on it. The best way to get an interaction is to respond to an open, like my permanent starter call, message me or send an ask meme and make a thread off of it! You're also just welcome to make a starter for me, no need to ask if you've read my rules.
"well, you see..." too prideful to apologize, but guilty enough to avoid the other's red gaze for a few moments as he fiddled with one of the buttons on his suit. maybe it was better to change the game plans before inviting alastor. now he knew for next time. thankfully, salvation came in the form of a subject change.
"i'm pretty sure he's above all that like the rest of us technically are," lucifer replied. "though i guess it's kind of funny he goes by he, or the rest of us kind of took on... you know." he hoped the demon would pick up what he was trying to get at, even if he didn't have the full vocabulary to explain it all perfectly. there was a slight, defensive glare at being circled until alastor took his seat.
lucifer faced him with arms crossed now and narrowed his eyes at the question. the devil searched for the insult but couldn't find anything immediately. it was almost sympathetic? but that couldn't be right.
"... could you explain, without sounding like a riddle book for once?"
"Oh to be above all of the... you know," he practically flapped a hand around as if doing so would convey the concept of gender with none of the words. "It sounds nice, to be able to choose your own box, or leave the damn thing altogether. I say 'he' too, but it doesn't really mean a damn thing to me. Really if anything it's just been a list of rules of what shouldn't be done. Not that any of it really matters, now."
He shrugged, introspecting not a damn bit as he moved to sit sideways on his chair, limbs kicking about. His nose scrunched as Lucifer insulted him out of absolutely fucking nowhere. And here he was, ready to settle down.
"Having a hard time keeping up? I suppose I can make it more simple for you," Alastor said, smile crinkling his eyes harshly. "I think it's a little more romantic to think there was a time where you weren't expected to be... well, anything at all! A child. Perhaps I'm making an assumption but it sounds like you were just awake one day, fully formed, ready to do what was asked of you. That's... infuriating to me, I suppose."
okay, so alastor was clearly no idiot. he'd hoped the radio demon would gloss over the pause, but that wasn't the case, and lucifer couldn't help the faint tinge of gold on his face at being caught essentially making the other a joke.
"it uh... it wasn't my idea, to be fair. no one's actually poking you. it'll be a picture of a donkey and a paper tail, i swear." he waved his free hand before returning it to the small stack of invitations he still had left and raising a brow at the question.
"it wasn't an egg like you suggested." lucifer never felt comfortable thinking back on his time in heaven, but his initial existence was just vague enough that he didn't feel the need to avoid an answer like usual. "i just... was. poof. tah-dah. existing. god decided i'd be, so i was. it was a really long time ago, bambi. can't tell you much more than that. were you expecting the creator to actually carry us or something?"
"With my face on it, or without?" Alastor asked, head tilting. He let his voice be soft as well as his eyes, teasing at some implication of hurt, but far enough away that he could deny it if called out or god forbid apologized to.
Squirm.
"Well, that's not very exciting now is it? And I don't know, really. I hardly know if God is a man, a woman, some other folk or a mix of both. There are books upon books, but they were wrong about you. What's to say all of human theory on God is wrong, too? What if, as with all things, the victor was the one who got to write the story and the hero never won at all?"
He circled Lucifer, just once before settling into a chair, the intensity in him dying with the action. Back to the nonchalance with an open handed shrug.
"I was hoping it was an egg, and that maybe you had a period of time where you weren't expected to be a full person right out of the box. That's a kinder idea, don't you think?"
"ah! perhaps now, but when i first moved, i was less so! or, tried to be, in any case! maybe you would have liked me less, if we met then! who can say?" Dr. Carrard can't. "...there were many complications as to why i had moved, you understand. but this is another story for another day."
As personable as he is, Carrard rarely speaks of his time alive, or much of his past at all. He keeps things hidden, just as Anomaly does, though he's less overt about keeping his secrets than Anomaly is.
Working while Alastor speaks, he nods on occasion, all while stitching back together someone he knows he can call a dear friend. Maybe more, but never less. "you and vox were close, from what it is i can tell. i am sure it must have been difficult to find someone who reminded you of him."
A very soft sigh as he changes his gloves and pulls a new needle to thread to begin working on stitching skin, rather than organs, together. There is some consideration he has, on whether or not to explain more on what he does, but in the end he only lets that subject drop. Another time, perhaps, but the conversation was heavy enough as it was.
His head tilts up towards Alastor, tilted slightly to the side in question, before dropping back down to watch himself knit Anomaly's shredded abdomen back together. "well! i suppose we continue as friends! but." He continues, a bit more gently, "you will have to tell anomaly some of this. i am not saying everything! but they will need to know you want friendship with them. otherwise they will keep their walls in place. and believe me, it is hard enough to scale them as me, in the position i am in with them! i can hardly imagine how hard it would be if you do not make yourself clear!"
A pause. Dr. Carrard looks up again, the glow of his visor soft. "and i would also like to be your friend, you understand."
Alastor didn't push with Dr. Carrard, even if he truly did want to dig in deeper with him. Now, however, certainly wasn't the time. Likely for a lot of things, but certainly nothing that was a sore subject. They were both sore enough already, weren't they? And yet he rubbed salt in his own wounds already.
"We were. But whereas Vox and I are destined to harm one another, I think... I hope, Anomaly and I can avoid it. I can tell them when I don't like something and it isn't- they don't treat it as if I'm harming them by being unable to. Do something," he said, the rare start and stop of his sentences missing their radio static altogether, Alastor's voice laid bare with his staff tucked away. When he exhaled it shook, much like his hands. The shift of subject was a welcome one, and one which he made at least an attempt at eye contact for, though holding it never lasted long. The radio demon listened to the advice given, nodding to show that he had taken it in, some pinch between his eyes and a flattening of his ears giving away just how eager he was to execute on it.
"... I'll do it."
He froze as the doctor made his own intentions so clear. Alastor's heart felt as if it were aching into his throat, the wanting so sharp to the point of being unbearable.
"I just thought... since we're friends and-"
Vox's voice rang in his ears.
"Oh..." Alastor said, as if he'd been stabbed and he'd just realized there was a knife embedded in him. He swallowed thickly. "I'd... I'd like that very much, doctor. Your- Delabra tells me your name is Percy. Do you have a preference? I do so love to say doctor and enjoy it for once, so it makes little difference to me."
He busied himself with a summoned bucket and sponge, washing off what blood he could away from Anomaly as they were closed up. Once he got what he could without disturbing the wound he scooped them up once again, creating a portal to their room for the three of them to pass through. Another wave and the linens were changed to something clean, several blankets stacked on top of each other. He knew they would be cold.
"... I'll be back shortly- I'm going to clean myself up... I think I should say, my tone with you earlier was. It... I wasn't doing well. This- you didn't decide for this to happen. I just don't want to see it again."
POSITIVITY TIME ! drop a ✦ in my inbox and i'll tell you at least one thing i like about your writing, portrayal, headcanons, world building, blog aesthetics, whatever it is i like about your blog, writing, & portrayal!! if you can't see the symbol, send 'star'!
Ah! I see this, letters! I am not so surprised to see this is what you are doing! And also will I do! Yes, yes! What I must say then, is this that, I am unaviavble today! Yes; I am aware of where it is you live because I also am liveing there! But this was important, so I am contacting you in this way! It is about Anomaly; specifically: on the 25th of this very month is will be the day of their birthday! Whether or not it is something other sinners celebrate, I am not sure, but! They like to celebrate it! Not extensively, I am sure you can imagine, but they will eat cake on this day and that is very good enough for me to make one on that day! :) I thought you would wish to know!
You are unavailable? Well, that's a shame. But it did motivate me to clean my room, and it is a nice change of pace to communicate with you like this too. Anomaly and I text rather frequently, but I wasn't even aware that you had my number! I don't think I have to ask how you've gotten it... Sinners still celebrate birthdays as far as I'm aware! There was a long legged fellow that used to stay at the hotel before your time here, and they had quite the celebration for him, anyhow.
Are you asking me to attend their celebration? I think I can clear my very busy calendar for it. I'll leave the baking to you and try to find a suitable gift for them on my end. I have a few ideas but I think some art supplies would encourage them to continue pursuing their craft. I haven't gotten to see it just yet, but most great artists have worked with more than just one medium, so I figure opening the door to more would be beneficial.
Yours truly,
Alastor.
PS: You're welcome. 🫀 I hope your work is going well!
Sass leans back into their chair and grins to themself. They can't help it. They can tell without a shadow of a doubt that they get under this guy's skin. They can't help but find that extremely funny. "yeah, lakeview's great. huge, compared to some of the towns nearby. i mean, have you ever been to lalock. like, ten people live there, max."
They tap their fingers against their desk and then pick up the phone to hold it closer as they speak into it.
"so, lakeview. to the north, valley city. to the east, clear hill. south, riverwalk, west is ridgewood. the main draw of lakeview, small and cozy as it is, is the lake, right. i mean, they named the whole town after the fact that there's a lake, so... y'know. but there's this other thing that people from out of town talk about, but the locals never seem to bring up for some reason. did you know that lakeview has more ufo sightings than the entire state combined."
"now, don't get me wrong, there's a military base in valley city which, as noted, borders to the north. so, yeah, they're probably testing shit and doing flyovers, sure. i can agree to that. but i mean... i'm not saying the people in lakeview are all geniuses but i think most of 'em could recognize a plane from something they can't identify, don't you."
Alastor listened quietly as the caller detailed the area for him, quite helpfully actually. While the radio host had taken the time to take a look at a map before moving to Lakeview, he hadn't gotten the chance to really dig in to see just what surrounded his new home. As Sass went on however, even Alastor's breathing seemed to go quiet, something so still in the radio static coming through.
"... I didn't know that, but I'm not surprised. I saw something myself the other night while I was driving up the mountain up to where I'm at now. It was between the trees, far too round to be a plane, and it didn't *fly* so much as it hovered. I think anyone who would have seen that would have agreed it wasn't a plane, genius or idiot," Alastor said, voice a bit soft. "I haven't heard a single thing about it since moving here, though, you're right. I wonder why everyone in town has gone quiet about it? Perhaps they got tired of not being taken seriously, and just decide to not bother now?"
He sighed a bit, leaning back in his seat.
"Do you know where the sightings usually take place?"
@theserpnt sent : lucifer had mixed feelings on whether or not he wanted to invite alastor of all people. but in the end, he figured the guy lived at the hotel too, so it would be rude not to. plus, maybe he'd actually loosen up a little and have fun? he'd like to see that. the devil handed over the invite with a nod. "maybe it's not your style, but you're still invited if you wanted to show up this saturday. there'll be pin the tail on the—" a brief pause, where he realized he might have to change something. "you know. and a piñata! but yeah, woo, party."
"Oh? Were you born? And here I thought maybe you had hatched out of some cosmic egg," Alastor said, looking over the invite with an airy, curious expression. He stopped as Lucifer seemed to realize some sort of faux-pas. Alastor didn't care to put two and two together, but he did, and it was with no shortage of indignation. Was he meant to be some sort of jester? No matter, he'd simply commit arson if he needed to.
"Are there going to be party games where one can see, or should I bring my own blindfold for the occasion? Personally, I think having multiple players with pins and sticks at a time would spice up the games."
He chuckled at his own joke, resting a hand on his hip. "In any case... how exactly did you come into existence? I'm curious. I'm certainly never going to meet The Almighty to ask."
"hm!" It isn't that Dr. Carrard is opposed to what Alastor wants. Carrard is, after all, painfully soft-hearted when it comes to doing what those he cares about want to do. This is just something he's never shared with anyone, alive or dead. It causes some hesitation, but no shame. He's never felt shame for what he does, and very rarely regret. He's very results oriented, no matter the cost.
But there is really no possible way for him to deny Alastor's offer. Regardless of his own reservations of sharing his work with someone, the doctor's can't ignore the fact that it would be nice to have someone work with him. Anomaly would never be interested, at least not in the dissection part, and he would never assert that upon them. Delabra he wasn't even sure fully believed what he did.
And here Alastor was... Not just willing, but asking to go along. There really wasn't any chance that Dr. Carrard was going to say no. No chance at all.
Visor glowing brightly, he takes the offered hand and bows just slightly before Alastor, peering up at him with that feels like a grin in his direction. "well! if you so insist! can you be ready tonight?"
Out of all of the things men tended to choose to do, bowing just so was one of the things Alastor favored. None thusfar had managed to illicit quite the giddy rush as Dr. Percival Carrard had, though. Warmth bloomed up under the radio demon's skin, not showing on his features but my did he ever feel it. He shrugged a shoulder up and turned his head into it slightly, humming his laughter.
“Mmmm-hm-hm-hm... oh, for you? I could be ready in twenty minutes. But no no, I’ll give you time to figure out who it is we’re hunting down tonight. Get your affairs in order, doctor,” Alastor said, finding that his breath was caught under his ribs somewhere. Oh, what to say, what to say? “I am just positively buzzing! You won’t regret it. I think you'll find that I'm quite helpful, and four hands are better than two, hm?” He raised his hand just enough to pat it against the side of where he imagined the doctor’s neck to be, smiling with warm eyes, pupils just a bit larger than usual. “I’ll let you go. See you tonight! I'll come meet you back here.”
And then he was jaunting off quickly, heading back to the hotel with a bit of a peppy clack against the stone floors of the sewers. When Alastor did eventually meet the doctor back at the lab he had changed into something a little bit more fitting for a dissection than his usual suit: a double breasted labcoat befitting a mad scientist complete with a red cross going down the chest, and high set latex gloves.
"So! Do you already have our subject, or shall I be helping to hunt them down? I brought a bone saw, also. Just in case! You never know when you're going to need one."
Hello, doctor! I hope you are doing well! I just finished lunch. Quite the catch though a bit on the messy side… not that I mind too terribly much. I would be absolutely delighted to speak with you! You know where I live if you’d like to stop by. I should be done cleaning up in a few minutes. Have you eaten anything today?
he had, in fact, predicted some sort of sass about not being trusting, or teasing about being overly cautious. so when alastor went ahead and did something completely unexpected, the devil could only stare for a few moments in surprise; it seemed he was actually serious about this. lucifer carefully picked up the key, looking it over before pocketing the thing just in case. "the maid, right?" he clarified. and then, as an additional surprise, he felt bad.
here he was half glaring at the radio demon, anticipating the worst, and he was actually worried about the tiny sinner. who would've thought? he assumed alastor cared for no one but himself. he made a show of sighing and rolling his eyes as he looked away.
"... fine. but if it really is something i can't—" handle? he decided not to finish that sentence. "if it something i need your help with, i'm getting right back out and then we're figuring it out." trust was not something he gave freely, or really at all when it came to sinners. least of all, alastor. but it seemed he was stuck between being helpful to charlie and ensuring someone who was frightened didn't have to deal with the noise. lucifer thought for a few moments, then in a little puff of red smoke, he was suddenly a white ferret with a few of the same physical details that showed just who he was.
"i'll be right back." there was one more hesitant pause, and then he went into the vent to see just what the source of all the commotion was.
“… Yes! Niffty is the maid,” Alastor said, blinking a few times, brows arched wide over his forehead. His smile was ever so different for the question, really, that smug veneer that seemed to plague both of their interactions falling away for just a flicker. His eyes didn’t settle into a squint, nose remained less than crunched. By all measures it was a pleasant smile, his head tilted off to the side ever so slightly.
“If you really can’t solve it on your own then fine! Come right back out the way you shuffled in and we’ll come up with a new solution. With my brains and your…” there was the squint. Alastor stared at Lucifer as if he were an eye doctor’s chart set across the hallway, and he’d been deprived of his monocle for the test. “… pure angelic power? We’ll certainly be able to do something about it. Not to worry.”
Alastor watched as Lucifer scurried off into the vents. He busied himself with his crossword in the meantime, pencil clasped between his teeth with the little book propped up on his lap.
The source of the problem? A sock with something large enough to make a clanging noise was stuck onto a piece of metal right near the fan. Whatever it was was heavy enough to make quite a ruckus but still light enough to be pushed around by a bit of wind. Further inspection would provide the… bizarre answer. Someone, for whatever reason had stuffed not only a sock full of drugs into the vent, but… also a pair of dentures? The road to redemption was a journey, it seemed.
“Are you still alive in there? I’m fairly certain there’s nothing in Hell that can kill you but better to be on the safe side and check. You’d make quite the terrible smell after a few days~”
➻ Kissy Kissy Prompts @pentious sent:💄 Leave lipstick marks on the receiver's face / neck / body. - Rosie! (Bonus.... And pen)
Alastor made a good show of protesting too much at first, growling once as Rosie took his jaw in one hand, pressing a kiss mark against the ridge of his cheek before making a line of them. The sound clipped in his throat shortly after she had started really, as she always seemed to know exactly how to handle him, whether that meant trying to get the better of him or... well, this. Huffing softly he pulled back exactly as much as that hand would allow him, glaring ineffectually and with the intimidation skills of a bothered kitten. Only after he had his little moment did he lean forward to steal a kiss from her, his lipstick transferring off an ink-dark green onto hers. It was rare he wore it, but the night's event was a bit on the classier side so he figured... why not match the flair of his company?
He could feel Pentious shift behind him from where they were all huddled up on one small, blush colored cabriole sofa. The three of them had retreated into some powdery anteroom off a bathroom, a place to decompress and retouch makeup in flattering lighting with large mirrors to aid in the process. Alastor glanced sideways into them to gauge the snake's reaction, and then decided to reach backwards to curl his fingers around theirs with a tug forward to urge them in. An invitation, if they wanted it, but nothing so demanding as his claws slipped away easily.
Slowly, Anomaly pulls their knees to their chest. They hug them tightly and rest their chin on top of their knees, watching Alastor closely, listening intently. It was so... Weird to hear him describe back to them the way they often felt when it came to touching and being touched.
"i mean, maybe i wouldn't mind it with you. i just. don't like to be surprised by it." But they have to navigate carefully here. It's not like they can just ask. That's not their arrangement anymore. Even if they might want to, it's just. Not in the cards. They can accept that.
They follow his gaze. They wonder what it is with him and Vox, not for the first time, either. Something bad, they can tell that much. But how bad? They don't think they dare touch that just yet.
"i won't electrocute you." They say, shrugging their shoulders and then letting out a quiet sigh. "that's not that hard to avoid, assuming you're not attacking me, or whatever."
They squint slightly. Maybe they do dare press. Just a little. "...you know a lot about vox."
“… Alright. That’s good for me to know. I don’t either so, let’s both avoid surprising one another,” he said, his head turned ever so slightly to look at them. There was something distant in how he gazed over to Anomaly, something soft and questioning, at least as far as the radio demon went. Red eyes widened at the promise back, his head turning back away.
“Thank you. I don’t expect you to avoid anything if I’m attacking you. You have a right to defend yourself, and I don’t have a right to tell you how,” he said, falling into silence that stretched on after. His ears pinned back slightly as they noted he knew about the other overlord. But what to say? Alastor clicked his tongue.
“… We were… relatively close once. I met him shortly after he arrived in Hell in the 1950s. He was obsessed with me from the start, but breaking it off with him and refusing to be his partner only cemented that obsession. Men with a taste for power famously love being rejected. In any case, I was recently his captive and during my time there I… drove him to the brink of insanity where he tried to kill me, him, and… everything in creation his little weapon could reach. Just to 'wipe the smile off my face'. If that gives you the flavor of it.”
Lyssa hummed softly, pursing her lips as she listened. Mentally cataloguing anything that caught her interest, or that she deemed possibly useful for later. She could admit, he was correct. He had been rather forthcoming with his question; being direct wasn't something that a lot of souls in Hell could say they were apt to do, and, while she suspected there was more to his reasoning for being here today, she did appreciate it.
And, something was to be said for the inquisition about whether or not she was 'someone he should worry about.' It was...brave? No, that wasn't the word. Smart? There it was. It was smart to ask her such a thing - especially since he didn't know her, or what she could do, very well. Setting the teapot down once she'd poured her own tea, Lyssa lifted her cup and slowly drank from it. A calm, if contemplative, expression on her face. A few seconds later, she replaced it on its saucer, and clasped her hands together.
"I would not go so far as to say that I will be an issue for you, Alastor, unless someone should come around here and seek to ask me to target you." She laid the facts out plainly, lifting her gaze to meet his. "As such deals are not out of the scope of what I can handle, it is not altogether impossible that one day, some poor, misguided soul may come here asking me to do exactly that. However," Lyssa lifted a finger, sitting up straighter.
"I believe in forethought. Forethought, and fore-planning. That is to say, should you desire to take preemptive measures to ensure that does not occur, and can offer me a good enough reason - a deal, perhaps, of some kind - to keep you out of my proverbial "line of fire" for good, the possibilities are in your favor." Lyssa let her statement settle, watching him to see what his reaction may be. Without waiting too entirely long, she was on to another topic. "As for what I do..." she thought for a second. "Emotional manipulation sounds...far too dodgy. Even for one in Hell." A dismissive wave of the thought was given, as well as a shake of the head. "Emotional recalibration, that sounds much better. Yes." settled on that, she continued.
"You know how one cannot go a day without coming across a Sinner with a broken heart? Some unfortunate soul, that, no matter how hard they try, is simply too burdened with their lives down here, or that which came before, to even attempt making something of themselves?" To demonstrate, a small purple orb formed in front of her, showing a bunch of sad faces, crying faces, and angry expressions floating within it. "Well, what I do.. is I help them. All of those souls who just can't seem to get out from under the emotional weight they're carrying come to me, and I take it all away for them. Lock up the unwanted, horrible things they're feeling, and leave them with a smile on their face and their hearts feeling oh, so much lighter!"
The little faces in the orb switched, becoming a lot of smiling faces rather than the ones from before. She clasped her hands and tilted her head, pantomiming the idea of being some form of 'altruistic benefactor'. The light didn't meet her eyes, however. And her smile didn't feel genuine, as she sighed. In an instant, she changed.
"...For a price." she snapped her fingers, and the orb vanished completely. "Nothing I do here, is for free. I begin with a taste - emotions recalibrated for a week here or there, a month, if they're lucky. And then, I reverse things. Shorter and shorter becomes the time, until it is something so depended upon that Sinners will do anything to have the peace and comfort I provide them with, that they practically come begging for me to take their souls just to regain it." He'd requested honesty, and she'd given it - more or less. She'd still not given the 'why' she did things, only the 'how.'
"Your hotel patrons should be fine, so long as I am not requested to target them. I do long distance draining for a soul plus additional labor." Lyssa noted, folding her hands on the desk in front of her. "That is an outright price, non-negotiable. So far, no one has approached me to ask for such a thing, as far as I am aware." The last thought he'd expressed, the one about feeling like he'd met her before, she had not addressed just yet. Truly, she wasn't completely certain why that was, either. Though she'd been on Earth for a time as an angel, and as the Angel of Empathy, had even been a guardian for a couple of human souls. She wasn't about to mention her time in Heaven or on Earth, however, not where it came to giving away what she was - or, well, used to be. The best he would get, because she was actually beginning to wonder if she'd met him before as well, was the simple comment:
"As for why you're feeling that way, Alastor...perhaps it could be possible that we have met before. In another life, or something. So to speak." It was cryptic at best, but it was all she was giving for now. Perhaps, all she would give him at all.
"I trust I've answered enough to let you in on what goes on here, now?" she rose her eyebrow, then nodded to his tea cup. "Would you care for some more tea, or is there something else you would like to know? I may, or may not, have an answer."
As Lyssa attempted assurances that the hotel would not be targeted unless commissioned so, Alastor's eyes only narrowed, his claws squeezing the teacup regardless of the heat under them. He liked the sting of the cup more than he liked the answer, but in its own way it was comforting in how predictable it was. Lyssa was an overlord, well placed in her position as such. Nothing was for free. Not her services, and certainly not her loyalty. A deal he expected and believed in, far above something as flighty and fickle as a friendship. Deals were something one could count on, measured, relied upon. They were safe, if only Alastor made sure to set his conditions correctly.
The radio demon's jaw set, but he made a show of drinking his tea politely, eyelashes fanning over his cheeks as he took in the aroma and sipped from his cup oh so daintily. One pinky extended to soften the blow of the cup to the saucer, creating little noise as to not interrupt. Red eyes stayed focused on hers, almost too intently, a green spark traveling the length of his body from the tip of his ear to the soles of his feet, red hair bristled not unlike a cat's fur.
She was clever. But honest enough to say exactly what it was she did to grasp on to the hearts and souls of her victims. But what was it that she did once she had them? Her power would increase with influence of course, but for what purpose? Power for power's sake? Well that was his thing, she'd have to move over.
“Recalibration, manipulation… it’s really the same thing, isn’t it? Changing the natural course of another being’s emotions for your own gain. We don’t have to be so polite, do we? In any case, regardless of my feelings on the matter it’s simply none of my business unless you make it so. I don’t care about all of the hotel's little creatures. Heavens no. There are too many to count at this point. But I do have a itty bitty list of names that I could be persuaded to make a deal over," Alastor replied, tenting his fingers together over his tea. “We could talk about that, possibly. But if someone isn’t able to keep themselves emotionally upright even with a bit of fiddling then… they were always going to give in, you just made it come sooner for them. I think you’ll find I’m benevolent enough as well though, and there are some souls I do see worth sparing the agony. Yours could be one of them.”
The way he spoke was gentle, airy, but his eyes remained on a knife’s edge. “My list is a short one. My request is for you to leave Charlie Morningstar, Lucifer Morningstar, and Niffty alone. I would also appreciate being kept out of the mix, but I’ll leave it to your discretion if you’d like to open that door. My offer to you is to leave your business well enough alone, and to be a confidant of sorts. I’ve been in hell quite some time my dear, and the amount of dirt I have is substantial. In the event you need to know something about an Overlord, chances are I’ll be able to weigh in or find out what it is you need to know. My condition to this is that I should be allowed to refuse if I believe it could backfire on either of us or our interests. Naturally, if I can tell you why, I will.”
Alastor reclined in his seat slightly, hands folded delicately over his lap.
“I think it’s a beneficial deal. Perhaps this is intuition speaking out of turn, but I have the feeling that you might just need all of the friends that you can get here in hell, don’t you?” His head tilted slightly, smile wolfish. “I don’t believe we’ve met before, no. But I believe I’ve met someone like you. Do you catch my drift? Or should I be more direct?”
He pushed his teacup forward slightly.
“I think, if you were to bleed into this cup it would look as if you’d filled it with gold. Just a hunch, but, like I said I’ve been in hell a long time. You’d be surprised what falls down here.”
– Alastor wouldn't have asked himself if this happened to be a first date. His self awareness lay too buried for that, his acceptance of his friendship with the doctor a fresh wound he was still licking clean. To know the actual color of his affections? It would be too much too fast, a horror at something fragile and fickle. Perhaps at a later time he'd recognize it though, this being their first date. It was something simple and classy, of course.
"I want to attend a dissection with you!" Alastor threw his arms open wide, eyes just a tad bit wild. "... I'd like to see how you operate, quite literally. And besides. It's been quite some time since I've opened a fellow's chest cavity. I'm feeling a bit... nostalgic for it, doctor. That split of skin under a blade..."
He winked, as one does to their friends, raising one hand as if to speak conspiratorially, but he sung his sentence.
"I'll even help you hunt down the body~" he trilled, one hand perched on his chest. "What do you say? Take me out for a night on the town? We can get a few drinks, hunt down someone who has broken contract, see what makes their odd sinner biology go tick-tick-tick! It could be magical, just you and I... and whoever we kidnap, of course."
➻ For Muses Getting To Know Each Other || @pentious sent: ❝ really? i wouldn't have guessed that about you. ❞ - from Rosie!
"Of course I've dated before. Is that so hard to believe?" Alastor asked, his brows scrunching inwards along with the bridge of his nose, smile set like a piece of paper that was crinkled out and smoothed down again. It wasn't as if he was offended at the idea he would never date anyone, he could in fact, do without it. But he needed to clear the implication that he might not have been considered for the role. He was very handsome, thank you, he had known as much the second that being charming proved advantageous.
Regardless of his indignation, he settled back down with his head in Rosie's lap, the rest of him sprawled out over the cute blanket they had set up in Cannibal Town's most scenic park. His eyes went easy once again.
"I haven't dated much mind you. But I did go steady with Mimzy for a stint. I believe I've introduced you two before... do you remember? That darling forever-flapper gal with the big eyes all fanned out like bird's wings? We spent quite a bit of time together on earth, but, after all of these years we've... finally gone our separate ways."
He sucked in a breath, then exhaled. "She came seeking refuge at the hotel, with little intention of seeking any sort of change. I turned her away, and now my calls to her home don't go through. The line seems to have been ... disconnected."
