[dearblr]

Hello! This blog was formally a jiraiblog—As you'll see from the older posts—but due to circumstances (Cough cough 2025 being genuine Hell), I'm trying to be more positive. Coincidentally, I got into Dear Evan Hansen recently and decided that his entries were lowk a good idea so... here we are!

My name is Finn, Andy, or Evan! I'd appreciate being called Finn more than Andy since Finn is a 'scary word' for me (Cough... 2025 being genuine Hell...) but call me whatever. I am a minor (Do not DM if under 15 or above 18) and I have DID, Autism, and likely BPD. I will address myself in diary entries as Evan Hansen due to the blog theme.

You can submit asks here! You can rant about your day/week/etc. (Positive, negative, neutral, who cares!) and ask me questions (If you'd so please). Anything! I do have some rules, though.

No NSFW questions for me or anything sexual in your asks. (This does not include sexual assault or brief mentions!)

Add any necessary trigger warnings at the beginning of your ask! I will also be tagging them for people to filter out.

I have the right to not post your ask for any reason, but I will try my best to post as many as possible. Along with this, I might not reply.

Feel free to ask to be anonymous for any reason that you can't be! I will simply screenshot your ask and crop out your name.

Please keep any sort of discourse off this blog. Including 'syscourse', shipcourse, etc. My DNI is (pro/neu) endogenic/nontraumagenic/mixed origin/neurogenic 'systems' or 'plurals', (pro/neu) polyminds¹/tulpas, and (pro/neu) radqueers. That's it. I will not answer any hate asks or anyone that has broken this DNI due to personal comfort and the fact that I want this to be a safe space. If I feel I should address something, I will have a tag for it!

I am pro good-faith labels, anti endo, anti radqueer, pro educated self diagnosis.

#Dear Evan Hansen

This tag is for my personal posts!

#Dear Anonymous

This tag is for non-question anon² asks!

#Sincerely Me

#Other Entry

This tag is for question anon² asks!

#Dear YOU

Messages to you, the person reading this.

This is for any other post not necessarily related to the blog. I will use this for calling out people or 'discourse'.

Anon list:

None so far! This blog is new!

Links:

The exposure of my harasser [Link]

My main blog [Link]

30 Days of DID:

Day 1 [Link]

Day 2 [Link]

Day 3 [Link]

Day 4 [Link]

Day 5 [Link]

Day 6 [Link]

1 — Polyminds are listed due to their close relations to endos. I will not debate about this and I do not want to be 'educated'.

2 — 'Anon' in this context doesn't exactly mean anonymous. These are for any asks either on anon or off anon.

[dearblr]

Dear Evan Hansen, today was a good day, and here's why.

I have a new hyperfixation (Demonology) that I played a lot today, and my best friend actually showed up after school! We couldn't hang out but she still showed up and told me about her day.

After cutting off my ex, I feel a lot better! I'm no longer splitting (BPD) and having episodes constantly which is great! ALSO, I GOT A SLUSHIE FROM 7/11! They call me Michael Mell...

I have been switching a bunch today but my amnesia hasn't been.. the worst. It's mostly coming into consciousness and realizing we HAVE A SLUSHIE!

Sincerely, me!

[dearblr]

30 Days of DID — 06 ♡ !

♡ — " How do you feel about talking about the trauma which created your condition? Do you like to write about it privately or publicly? Why? "

♡ — Ts is a jirai blog , I talk about my trauma 24/7 , LMAO . I don't get into specifics & I obviously keep things from the public but I do like to talk about it to like , everyone . Why ? God knows .

[dearblr]

30 Days of DID — 05 ♡ !

♡ — " How often do you switch? How often do you lose time? Talk a little about what dissociation is like for you. "

♡ — We normally switch at least once a day but recently , I've (Seventeen) been in front constantly & we only switch during episodes . We lose time 24/7 , it's kind of like the Adam Sandler movie (50 First Dates) where our memory resets every day .

♡ — Dissociation shows up in a number of ways ? But life felt like a fever dream for years after a traumatizing event until we suddenly woke up one day . Most of the time , we zone out while staring at a wall or come into consciousness in the middle of an activity .

[dearblr]

30 Days of DID — 04 ♡ !

♡ — " Are you or any of the others in a relationship in or out of the system ? How does dating work for you if you do it ? "

♡ — We are currently in a relationship (Hi , Yuri :3) out of sys . For in-sys , George x Philip are in a situationship & Hermes x Virgil have been dating for awhile now , it'll be a year in a couple months .

♡ — Dating in-sys works like any other relationship for us . Dating out of sys uh . . Always goes bad . We all have differing opinions on our partner & I think that I — Seventeen , the host — am the only one currently dating our partner ? I know that there are a couple others that have fronted that barely even know hxr , so . .

[dearblr]

30 Days of DID — 03 ♡ !

♡ — " What are your thoughts on integration? Do you wish to integrate? "

♡ — I mean , everyone integrates . But if this means final fusion , I think it's a valid path for anyone wanting it , but I don't . I mean , this is all I've ever known & I've survived this long without it , why would I do that ? To me , if I tried , it'd be me trying to chase the idea of being 'normal' , & that's just extremely anti recovery for me . I have my ups & downs with my system , but I love us .

[dearblr]

30 DAYS OF DID . 02 ♡

" Who knows about your system? Who do you want to know? What do you feel like it’s like coming out as multiple? "

I'm only open online . I would like my parents & IRL friend to know , along with being diagnosed / medically recognized . We dk what it's like because hashtag memory loss . . .

[dearblr]

30 DAYS OF DID . 01 ♡

" Describe your system. What kind of system, how big, anything you feel is a good introduction. "

We are a DID system of around 50 ? We don't care much for headcounts , they're dumb to us . We use both singular pronouns & plural pronouns , mostly plural ones in system contexts . DO NOT CALL US PLURAL . WE ARE NOT PLURAL , WE ARE TRAUMATIZED . We've always kinda known but found a name for it back in November of 2024 . Not currently diagnosed . Idk what else to really say hashtag we are Autistic & dk how to introduce ourself . .