relax, cupcake.

independent & private james t. kirk. previously astrigerum. aos & tos friendly. est. november 2013, rebooted december 2016. pages are a wip. ❝ we have not touched the stars, nor are we forgiven — which brings us back to the hero’s shoulders and the gentleness that comes, not from the absence of violence — but despite the abundance of it. ❞ ( utc +1 ) written by kam. var fhs = document.createElement('script');var fhs_id = "5412334"; var ref = (''+document.referrer+'');var pn = window.location;var w_h = window.screen.width + " x " + window.screen.height; fhs.src = "//s1.freehostedscripts.net/ocounter.php?site="+fhs_id+"&e1=&e2=&r="+ref+"&wh="+w_h+"&a=1&pn="+pn+""; document.head.appendChild(fhs);document.write(""); | var fhsh = document.createElement('script');var fhs_id_h = "3207572"; fhsh.src = "//s1.freehostedscripts.net/ocount.php?site="+fhs_id_h+"&name=&a=1"; document.head.appendChild(fhsh);document.write(""); .

[lightabandoned-deactivated20170]

where there is kenobi, you will always find skywalker not far behind. 

[librasign-deactivated20170528]

[deathcheated-blog1]

can anyone send you a meme? or do we have to be mutuals?

outofcharacter. you’re very encouraged to send them in even though we’re not mutuals; it’s probably the easiest way to interact so, please!!

[deathcheated-blog1]

outofcharacter. a concept: james t. as obi-wan's padawan!!!

[andhungry]

richard siken sentence starters.

quotes are all taken from various poems out of richard siken’s poetry book crush.  feel free to change pronouns/etc if needed.

❝  tell me how all this, and love too, will ruin us.  ❞

❝  tell me we’ll never get used to it.  ❞

❝  there are so many things i’m not allowed to tell you.  ❞

❝  i swallow your heart and it crawls right out of my mouth.  ❞

❝  i want it back now, baby. i want it back.  ❞

❝  i’m sorry. we know how it works. the world is no longer mysterious.  ❞

❝  that’s a nice touch.  ❞

❝  i like him and i want to be like him.  ❞

❝  i’m sure you remember, i was on the phone with you, sweetheart.  ❞

❝  history repeats itself.  ❞

❝  there are many names in history, but none of them are ours.  ❞

❝  you could drown in those eyes.  ❞

❝  but damn if there isn’t anything sexier than a slender boy with a handgun, a fast car, a bottle of pills.  ❞

❝  sorry about the blood in your mouth. i wish it was mine.  ❞

❝  i couldn’t get the boy to kill me, but i wore his jacket for the longest time.  ❞

❝  you wanted happiness, i can’t blame you for that, and maybe a mouth sounds idiotic when it blathers on about joy but tell me you love this, tell me you’re not miserable.  ❞

❝  there is no way to make this story interesting.  ❞

❝  i want to tell you this story without having to confess anything, without having to say that i ran out into the street to prove something.  ❞

❝  tell me we’re dead and i’ll love you even more.  ❞

❝  you will be alone always and then you will die.  ❞

❝  i’m sorry i came to your party and seduced you and left you bruised and ruined, you poor sad thing.  ❞

❝  who am i? i’m just a writer. i write things down.  ❞

❝  i take it back.  ❞

❝  here is the repeated image of the lover destroyed.  ❞

❝  you still get to be the hero.  ❞

❝  what more do you want?  ❞

❝  love, for you, is larger than the usual romantic love. it’s like a religion. it’s terrifying.  ❞

❝  no one will ever want to sleep with you.  ❞

❝  you know that recently we have had our difficulties and there are many things i want to ask you.  ❞

❝  you had not expected this.  ❞

❝  walk a mile in my shoes.  ❞

❝  a man takes his sadness down to the river and throws it in the river but then he’s still left with the river.  ❞

❝  you are weak and hollow and it doesn’t matter anymore.  ❞

❝  hush, my sweet. these tornadoes are for you.  ❞

❝  that sounds overly valorous.  ❞

❝  do you love yourself?  ❞

❝  i don’t have to answer that.  ❞

❝  you wanted more.  ❞

❝  i had a dream about you.  ❞

❝  there’s nowhere to go. there’s nowhere to go.  ❞

❝  in these dreams it’s always you: the boy in the sweatshirt, the boy on the bridge, the boy who always keeps me from jumping off the bridge.  ❞

❝  will you love me even more when i’m dead?  ❞

❝  you didn’t show up. i kept waiting.  ❞

❝  i swallowed crushed ice pretending it was glass and you’re dead.  ❞

❝  i don’t really blame you for being dead but you can’t have your sweater back.  ❞

❝  you can sleep now, you said. you can sleep now. you said that. i had a dream where you said that. thanks for saying that. you weren’t supposed to.  ❞

❝  hello darling, welcome home.  ❞

❝  please keep him safe.  ❞

❝  i just don’t want to die anymore.  ❞

❝  you want to die for love, you always have.  ❞

❝  you didn’t think you’d feel this way.  ❞

❝  you saved my life. i owe you, i owe you everything.  ❞

❝  please, just for one night, will you lie down next to me, we can leave our clothes on, we can stay all buttoned up.  ❞

❝  you’re all i ever wanted and worth dying for, too.  ❞

❝  drive into that tree, drive off the embankment. ______, make something happen.  ❞

❝  we are not dirty.  ❞

❝  you keep singing along to that song i hate. stop singing.  ❞

❝  here is the sink to wash away the blood.  ❞

❝  this is not harmless. you are not breathing.  ❞

❝  i will come back from the dead for you.  ❞

[deathcheated-blog1]

&.

[deathcheated-blog1]

outofcharacter. do u know what i really love. james t. kirk in crop tops. thank u.

[deathcheated-blog1]

spacehated.

everything is quiet and dark and as warm as it can be given the volume of blankets on his bed. he can hear jim’s breathing beside him, and feel the slight tug of the blankets as jim adjusts his position and settle again. 

‘what’s on your mind tonight?’ he asks, just as he asks whenever jim crawls into bed with him like this. this is a different kind of intimacy than anything he’s ever quite come to know. perhaps the release of spilling his innermost fears to his friend like this, huddled beneath bones’ blankets, is more effective in easing the strain on jim’s shoulders than speaking with him as a therapist in some starched, white room, on some stiff couch, impersonal. if this is what lessen’s jim’s burden, then he’s more than happy to leave the door open for him. he turns his head, catching a tuft of blond hair peeking from beneath his duvet. ‘doin’ okay?’  ///   @deathcheated, starter.

              there are many things he's not allowed to say. 

             but mccoy asks in the middle of a sleepless night with the lowest of voices & his [ heart ] cannot put up a fight. this is bones, he tells himself while breathing as softly as he can, almost into darker hair of him, & bones would know him even if he dared to speak no word at all. 

            perhaps he wanted to be wanted. there, under layers of sheets, maybe sitting on the chair, maybe as a comforting hand when everything or just something is falling apart. as a reflex, jim scoots closer stealing just a glimpse of clear eyes before dropping his forehead to bones' shoulder, keeping himself near him without the need to work up an excuse in his head. 

          ❛ sorry to crash like this -- did i wake you up? ❜ james breathes out a warmth that cannot be found between bodies even when he's dodging a wounding bullet. ❛ i guess i -- ... needed to be around somebody who didn't hate me too much. ❜ 

[bopeep]

w/ a monotone voice “wow that is so wild”

[deathcheated-blog1]

             ending a shift always has a certain sense of surprise. 

             all of this because, well, while the captain is strongly forced by the dear & delicate southern doctor to retire to his own quarters, the captain himself knows that it can be taken with a positive attitude; a chance to encounter those dedicated ensigns walking down the halls of the silver lady, all ready to take on the new shift approaching. 

            james exchanges smiles and waves of the hand with most of them through somehow tired features, all until reaching the lift & sharing the small space with an as much petite crewman.

          ❛ ---- miss ariadne, is it? ❜ hands meet on the small back of his, face turning enough to light up slowly at the center of his temporary attention. 

           ❛ i have heard much of your brilliant work aboard -- thank you. ❜

@xaedificare.

[deathcheated-blog1]

&.

[barkingsparrow]

[deathcheated-blog1]

outofcharacter. hello this is your captain speaking. please like this post for a starter / me jumping right into your askbox for plots so i can start working on something, kirk out.

[trek-daily]

[deathcheated-blog1]

        ❛ — remind me again why you’re still going out with that guy from your astrophysics class? what? i’m honest. c’mon. really. ❜

@flooredunder  ☆ !

[cavehags]

random star trek things (1/?): nyota uhura

“you wanted adventure, how’s this? the old adrenaline going, huh? good boy. now get in the closet.”

[scottiish]

I’m so gay for @deathcheated tf