Over To Us.

You may not be good, but you're sure as hell good enough.                                             (18+ only. Avatar by Pollution-of-Subterranean-Waters)

[decepticonsensual]

Choose Your Own Adventure Fic - Part 8

Part 1; Part 2; Part 3; Part 4; Part 5; Part 6; Part 7

The people chose to call Thunderclash to get a sense of his mental state.

 [CONTENT WARNING:  This installment deals with a character experiencing voices other people can’t hear, and an open question about whether the voices are real.]

________________________________________________

“Ultra Magnus is right,” you say, trying to ignore Skids shooting you a startled - and hurt - look.  “Before we decide anything else, let’s hail the Vis Vitalis.  We should at least find out where we stand.”

You silently hope Skids will understand.  You want to help Gleeerboo, and hopefully you can - but you’re not going to be of any help if you charge in without gathering all the information first.  You still don’t know what’s happening with the planet, or with Thunderclash, or how (or even whether) they’re connected.  And if you insist on just going to the planet without even checking on Thunderclash, odds are that Ultra Magnus or Perceptor will have a lot of questions for you.

Besides, Thunderclash is your patient, and that has to take priority.

Ultra Magnus hails the ship, and you wait.  And wait.

After a much longer pause than you’d normally expect, an image finally flickers to life on the main screen… but it isn’t Thunderclash.  Instead, you recognise the softly rounded features of one of Thunderclash’s subordinates.  You seem to remember that this was the Vis Vitalis’s second lieutenant - he came aboard the Lost Light when you last encountered Thunderclash.  You recall that he was a bit quiet, but then, it was probably easy for him to get lost in the flood of adoration directed at his commander, and then the high drama of then-first officer Paddox’s betrayal.

You wince slightly, still remembering the full-body ache after Swerve swung your alt mode into Paddox so hard that he shattered into his component beings.

“This is Ultra Magnus of the Lost Light to speak to Captain -”  Magnus is cut off.

“Oh, thank you, Primus!”  The young officer peers anxiously at you all.  “Please - we need your help.”

Magnus looks less than impressed.  “State your designation.”

The officer straightens up, although his expression still betrays his worry.  “Second Lieutenant Sparker, sir.  Please, I - I formally request assistance.  Captain Thunderclash is behaving extremely strangely, and I’m afraid he may be in danger, sir.”

“We are aware of the situation.  I am accompanied by Rung, one of the Autobots’ leading psychiatrists.”  You give a solemn nod when Magnus gestures in your direction, and you school yourself not to smile in greeting; in situations like this, many people prefer a serious expert to a friendly one.  “Captain Thunderclash himself contacted us, so if you could simply connect -”

“I can’t, sir!”  Sparker bursts out.  “The captain locked himself in the shuttle bay ten minutes ago, and he won’t answer his comm!”

Turning away from the screen, Skids murmurs, “Do we think he’s planning to -”

At that moment, a siren sounds on the Vis Vitalis.  You can hear a muffled voice in the background shouting, “Unauthorised launch!”  Sparker mouths a curse, and then disappears from view.

“We do,” Perceptor answers Skids coolly, and puts the view of the Vis Vitalis in space up on a split screen with the still-open comm link to the ship’s chaotic bridge.  He zeroes in on an even tinier dot that’s moving away from the Vis Vitalis at speed.  “I surmise that this shuttle contains Captain Thunderclash, and, further, that his trajectory is towards the planet.”

“Hail the shuttle.”  Magnus turns to you.  “Rung, you may be best suited to talk to him.”

You’re prepared for the hail to go ignored, but to your surprise, Thunderclash responds.  He looks haggard, hunched over the controls of a small shuttle.  There’s a grey tint to his facial metal, and his colours seem muted - a sign of stressed systems.  His optics, though, are blindingly, worryingly bright.

“Thunderclash here,” he says.  He isn’t looking at the screen, and he sounds distracted as his fingers fly over the controls.  As you watch, Thunderclash suddenly winces and clutches his head.  A second later, he seems to shake it off.

It's all you, Doc - what do you say?

Tell Thunderclash to return to the Vis Vitalis so you can help him.

Reassure him by saying you think the voices may be real (but nothing further).

Tell him about Greeeboo and the planet waking up.

Offer to accompany him to the planet to help figure out what's going on.

Keep him talking while you signal Magnus to move to intercept his shuttle.

Voting ended onSep 24, 2023

[qin-shi-huang-di]

Mr. Emperor sir, can I borrow one of your scheming eunuchs?

why BORROW one when i can MAKE you one instead? 😊

[grand-theft-carbohydrates]

hiii, just to clarify, you mean you’re going to make a special eunuch just for him, right?

[grand-theft-carbohydrates]

right?

[qin-shi-huang-di]

dont worry about it 😊

[decepticonsensual]

Was thinking about a Naruto band AU (or, more specifically, K-pop Demon Hunters AU) and the best decision I've come to so far is that the Sand Siblings would absolutely have a metal band called Desert Funeral.

[decepticonsensual]

@in-the-deepest-waters replied:

Sooo... Sasuke and Taka are Saja Boys. And Naruto, Sakura, and Sai are Huntrix?

Exactly this! :)

SO! Wasn't sure if I had enough of an idea to talk about this but fuck it. :D With the proviso that I'm probably not going to actually write this, it's just fun to think about. Here was my idea:

Naruto is the lead singer of Huntrix. Demon hunter on the side, the whole shebang. Trying at the same time to conceal from his bandmates and the world that he himself is half-demon. (Only the band's manager, Kakashi, knows about this - he's the one who was friends with Naruto's mortal parent. I don't know if I want to go in the direction of Kakashi having raised Naruto, though, so I may split the role of Rumi's adoptive mother - not sure.)

Huntrix is originally Naruto, Sai, Sakura... and Sasuke. Put a pin in that. :) Naruto is the front man and lead guitar, Sasuke is bass and also sings, and kind of resents Naruto being the sole face of the band. Sai is on keyboard, Sakura on drums.

Desert Funeral is the new band in town that starts challenging Huntrix's supremacy. Kankuro = frontman, lead guitar and vocals - loads of facepaint, very aggressive, doing the KISS tongue thing in all the official pictures, you get it; Temari = bass; Gaara = drums.

Initially, Desert Funeral are kind of in the Saja Boys role - hot new band with secret demons (although in this case with only one demon/part-demon, Gaara). Now, I think you COULD just have them be the antagonists throughout, as the plot of K-pop Demon Hunters kind of mirrors the Konoha Crush arc - group with secret!demons is brought in, supposedly for a big performance event, but really to stage an attack. But I wanted to do something a bit different, so -

In spite of their bands' rivalry, Naruto and Gaara somehow meet and hit it off. They each work out what the other is. (Gaara's siblings and manager, Baki, know, but no one else.) The connection is not necessarily romantic, but like with Rumi and Jinu, this is a space where they can be themselves and not have to worry about hiding.

Meanwhile! Sasuke gets a visit from Tobi. Tobi is part of the legendary band Akatsuki, which hasn't toured or put out new music in ages but is still famous. (Kakashi's former bandmate from his youth, Obito, left to join Akatsuki back in the day. The band Obito and Kakashi were in together is also where they both knew Minato from. Rin is still alive in this version, she's off living her best life somewhere.)

Tobi says he's moving into music production. Says he's putting together this new group, TAKA; it'll be the hottest thing on the charts, they just need a lead singer with Sasuke's charisma. Sasuke is tempted but unsure.

Tobi "confides" in Sasuke that, actually, he and the members of Akatsuki have more in common with Huntrix than you'd think - they're ALSO demon hunters! And as a fellow hunter, he feels he needs to warn Sasuke: that guy from Desert Funeral Naruto is hanging around with so much these days? Yup. He's a demon.

Tobi also knows about Naruto himself, but doesn't tell Sasuke this right away. Instead, he lets Sasuke work it out for himself by following Naruto and Gaara. Sasuke is enraged - I think we'd need to give him a different backstory here, like maybe his family was killed by a demon in this version, to make his stance more sympathetic. He comes storming back to Tobi and accepts his offer, leaving Huntrix abruptly without explaining why.

TAKA - which is the actual Saja Boys parallel, very catchy, light pop tunes - launches to great acclaim, and now there are three bands vying for the top spot on the charts. Meanwhile, Tobi and Akatsuki want to capture Naruto and Gaara for their own purposes; Sasuke has plans to expose his former bandmate; and Naruto's trying to figure out how to get Sasuke back in Huntrix.

I also started playing around with creating other bands out of the Konoha 13. I don't know what role they'd play in the story. :) I kind of stuck with the existing teams, but not fully, since I honestly looked at Shikamaru and couldn't see him as anything other than a manager. So the remaining 3 teams are divided into two bands:

Team 8 + Neji: Hinata on vocals/lead guitar, Kiba on bass, Shino on drums, Neji on keyboard. Or possibly something like violin. Something that screams "my strict family made me learn this instrument and now I'm repurposing it for what I want". Kurenai as manager.

Tenten, Lee, Ino, and Choji: Choji and Ino sing, Ino also plays guitar, Tenten on bass, Lee on drums. Shikamaru as manager.

And that's pretty much as far as I got!

[vel-shipper-form]

Getting used to it

❗️Please read from right to left (like manga!)

Bonus:

[exhuastedpigeon]

The first rule of fandom is have fun. The second rule of fandom is find an enabler and become an enabler. Yes you should write that fic. What if it was even hornier? What if it was angstier? What if you wrote it just for me?

[decepticonsensual]

Not going to bother formatting it, but - picture that meme of muscular arms clasping hands, but it's fan artists hiding relevant words in the reflection on Lee's hair & fan artists changing the kanji on Gaara's forehead into different relevant shapes.

[decepticonsensual]

Was thinking about a Naruto band AU (or, more specifically, K-pop Demon Hunters AU) and the best decision I've come to so far is that the Sand Siblings would absolutely have a metal band called Desert Funeral.

[luna-azzurra]

Fake Dating Prompts!!

☆ "Hold my hand and look like you mean it. My entire family is watching."

☆ "We need to get our story straight before we walk in there."

☆ "You're a terrible fake partner. You're too convincing when you're being sweet."

☆ "I didn't expect you to remember my coffee order. That wasn't part of the deal."

☆ "Stop looking at me like that in public. People will think you actually like me."

☆ "This was supposed to be simple. Why does nothing with you stay simple."

☆ "You held my hand first tonight. I didn't ask you to. I noticed."

☆ "My mother loves you. This has gotten wildly out of hand."

☆ "The lines are blurring and I need you to help me find them again."

☆ "I've said I love you fourteen times this weekend and meant it more each time. Problem."

☆ "You remembered the thing I said three weeks ago. Fake partners don't do that."

☆ "When does the act end and the real thing start. Asking for logistical reasons."

☆ "I convinced everyone we were in love. I forgot to convince myself it wasn't real."

☆ "Stop being so good at this. It's making everything very complicated for me."

☆ "We shake hands to end the deal. Neither of us is moving."

[decepticonsensual]

Stray Thoughts: Narutoblogging - "Big Adventure! The Quest for the Fourth Hokage's Legacy"

So, this is the two-part throwback adventure that happens SMACK IN THE MIDDLE of the Pain's Assault arc, interrupting just as Nagato and Konan are about to tell Naruto their stories - clearly the BEST moment to insert a filler arc. :D

Also - not relevant to anything, but it occurs to me that if Sasuke is going to be on the dock during the Five Kage Summit, he's... kind of running out of time to actually do anything he could plausibly be on trial for. We're only four episodes away from the end of Pain's arc, after all, and Sasuke hasn't shown up at all. What could they even get him on at this stage? He teamed up with notorious kage-murderer Orochimaru for three years... but did very little in that time, and eventually killed him; he tried to kill Itachi, and... didn't (and even if we accept that Itachi was a deep-cover Leaf spy... somehow, Sasuke couldn't be expected to know that and thought he was hunting a missing-nin murderer); he tried to kidnap Killer Bee, and... failed. The only thing I can think of is if Killer Bee gets got offscreen. That's a kage's brother, and even if it isn't Sasuke who ultimately captures him, they could argue Sasuke's assault left him vulnerable to the other Akatsuki. But the last we heard, Killer Bee was alive and free somewhere, so... I dunno. The biggest threat Sasuke really posed to the ninja world at any point was as Orochimaru's new vessel. As a rogue ninja in his own right, Sasuke, with all due respect, is just not as scary as he thinks he is.

I have to admit, in the middle of this arc where we've been losing beloved characters (and Jiraiya - kidding, I'm kidding :D), it's just nice seeing a retro title card with the chibi versions of all our faves running across the screen without a care in the world.

I wonder if it's a challenge for voice actors to suddenly revert their performance to the younger version of their character - at least when it's a situation like this, where they played that younger version for a couple hundred episodes and that voice is very familiar to fans, but it was a while ago now. Does it take them a minute to work their way back into the earlier iteration? Do they need to re-listen to their old performances?

Izumo and Kotetsu are reading about the upcoming chuunin exam finals roster in - I guess, ninja magazines? Kotetsu's has an advert for a (kitchen) knife on the back cover, and amid all the Japanese is just the English word "KNIFE", which is objectively the funniest single word to decide to translate. Like, yeah, it sure is, buddy. :D

Naruto and Choji have some pre-tournament ramen together, and Choji says mournfully that his dad's been really nice about him not making it to the final, and hasn't said a word, but Choji thinks he's probably really disappointed deep down. Awwww, Choji. <3 (I also don't think for a second that Choza is disappointed in his son, a rookie genin who made it all the way through the Forest of Death. I don't even think Choza would be disappointed in him if Choji fell at the first hurdle, because Choza's awesome like that, but Choji's done so well and it stings to see him down on himself.)

Naruto tells Choji, "I'll fight hard for you, too!" which is adorable up until Naruto runs out and leaves him with the lunch bill. :D

While I normally find the Sexy Jutsu jokes tiresome at best, I'll admit, I did laugh at Naruto telling Konohamaru off for getting cliched with his female alter ego: "The road to the Sexy Jutsu is long and treacherous!" :D

Iruka was apparently big into code-breaking games when he was a kid! Knowing his past, I wonder if code-breaking "game" means "breaking security codes so I could get into bits of Hokage Tower where I wasn't allowed and play pranks on people". :D

Anko tries to murder Naruto for stealing some of her dumplings, using the skewers from the other dumpling sticks as senbon, and honestly? If someone stole an entire stick of dumplings off my plate, ate them in front of me, told me he didn't like them, and then asked me for a favour, only my relative lack of ninja combat skills would prevent me doing the same thing.

I love that the Sand Siblings are in this arc purely to prowl menacingly around the village and terrify Naruto into training harder. :D (Seriously, they brought Gaara's voice actor in to say one word, that's all any of the siblings get here.)

Waaaaait a second. The whole premise of these episodes is that Naruto overhears Jiraiya saying he'd hoped "the Fourth Hokage's legacy" would be enough to see Naruto through the chuunin exam finals, and Naruto gets it into his head that this is a physical object of some kind, so off he goes to find it. Now, I'd assumed that the legacy Jiraiya actually meant was either the nine-tails' power or just Naruto taking after his dad, and that there was supposed to be a bit of dramatic irony in the viewers knowing about those things when Naruto doesn't yet. But then?? Halfway through the first episode, Guy happens to be carrying a pamphlet about the Fourth Hokage's legacy that he ostentatiously drops "by accident" in front of Naruto (in a pretty hilarious scene). So - this is a thing?? And there are informational pamphlets?? Or did Guy hear Naruto asking people and create a scavenger hunt to help take Naruto's mind off the stress of the final - and then think, "Nah, if I just tell him, it'll be too obvious. I'd better design a pamphlet with a map and have it professionally printed and then pretend to drop it where he can pick it up"?

There's even a glamour shot of Minato on the cover. It looks like an issue of Ninja Tiger Beat. :D

By the way, when Naruto runs into him, Guy is doing a pilgrimage of 100 shrines, walking on his hands the whole way, to pray for Lee's recovery. D'awwww. (I mean, if I were him I might be sticking closer to Lee's hospital room in case the Sand Village murder child decides to make another attempt on his life, but eh.)

Poor Naruto. The second his friends (Choji and Sakura) find out about the Fourth Hokage's legacy, they secretly resolve to hunt it down and give it to the objects of their affection (Shikamaru and Sasuke, respectively) instead.

However, I underestimated Naruto, who immediately perks up now that this is a race! :D Meanwhile, Ino and Sakura are treating this like their own personal rematch after their bout ended in a tie, which is honestly kind of fun. Shikamaru, on the other hand - despite being the other potential beneficiary of the prize - is moping around in full "I wish I were a cloud" mode. Oh, Shikamaru. :D

Our Heroes are also being dogged by a group of Rain Ninja, who didn't make it through to the final round of the exams and feel like they can't go back home without something to show for their efforts. I dunno, guys. A bunch of your comrades are now patches of damp red sand in the Forest of Death, so I'd count your blessings.

The fact that this is a Guy-created scavenger hunt gets confirmed when Guy himself turns up in a staggeringly terrible disguise as the "sage" of the sacred grounds. Only Naruto buys this, and is super-excited to meet a "real sage". Naruto you are studying with a real sage. I know it's Jiraiya, but still.

In classic fashion, Shikamaru ducks out of the group "just to go deal with something" alone - the "something" being the dozen Rain Ninja stalking them. Oh, Shikamaru. <3

Even in the midst of this lighthearted, goofy side adventure, I feel my heart breaking a little for Naruto when Sakura yells at him that his recklessness keeps putting people in danger - and he tears up and whimpers, "Don't say that, I just want to help." Like, she's not WRONG, but also, Naruto, bb.

I did get a chuckle out of Ino, Sakura, and Choji bonding over how tactless and awful Naruto is, after he complains about them being "heavy" when one of the obstacle course traps lands them all in a heap on top of him. (The actual problem, which no one seems to realise, is that Shikamaru is standing on the heap the whole time, with his whole body weight therefore pressing down through his feet, musing to himself about how he used SCIENCE! to escape the trap and not. Y'know. Letting his teammates up. :D)

Also, I don't want to hear shit about science from this show ever again after "the Sage of Six Paths created the moon".

As the gang approaches the final obstacle, Sakura and Naruto suddenly find themselves with blades to their throats - courtesy of Ino and Choji, respectively, who are hell-bent on making sure their guy gets the power-up of the Fourth Hokage's legacy. Shikamaru ends up calling them off, but it's honestly a badass moment. Team Ino-Shika-Cho can be terrifying even as pre-teens.

It is very funny that Naruto, grateful that Shikamaru chose friendship over competition, reaches a hand out to clasp his - and Shikamaru, looking up and seeing Naruto, surrounded by anime sparkles, hand outstretched, freaks out and just kind of - shoves the map into Naruto's hand instead. Whew, emotional vulnerability averted. :D

Much earlier in the arc, Sasuke was lamenting the lack of a live opponent to test his Chidori on, and Kakashi handed him a map. With everything else going on, I'd almost forgotten that bit - until Sasuke shows up right at the end to just electrocute the shit out of all the Rain Ninja. :D I'm assuming that Kakashi knew about them through Guy keeping an eye on the obstacle course - the ending confirms that the two of them collaborated on the whole idea - but Kakashi deciding to squeeze a little extra training mileage out of this scenario by sending Sasuke to use the Rain Ninja as living target practice is somehow both kind of chilling and very funny.

And that was the quest for the Fourth Hokage's legacy! I still think it's kind of wild to insert that break here of all places in the story, especially since, despite the name, the episodes don't really tell us anything further about Minato (which might have provided a link to the main arc, where Naruto's just met his father). At the same time, though? The breathing space in the midst of such an intense main arc turns out to be pretty welcome. Maybe it was the right decision. Plus, it's always fun revisiting the fan-favourite chuunin exam arc, and while I wouldn't say these two episodes offer anything new in terms of character development, they're a cute bit of froth.

Also, I will take pretty much any story that involves Guy being in a terrible disguise. It happens more often than you'd think, and still not often enough. :D

[kakashidaily]

day 23 // slide

[allisondraste]

Acknowledging that “critical thinking” means “thinking about things in a thorough way from different perspectives” and not “finding every flaw in a thing and fixating on it until all the joy is gone” is so liberating.

It’s supposed to be about intellectual curiosity, not about finding ways to devalue things that aren’t perfect or that we personally dislike.

[random-cockroach]

My brain is tired, so Rung, Ring, Ring and Rung

[decepticonsensual]

Stray Thoughts: Narutoblogging - Pain's Assault Arc, 11

Guy has to bark Lee's name to get him to look up from the tragic love story of the two toad sages. D'awwww, Lee.

I know the opening credits often include combat scenes that are kind of symbolic, not things that are actually in the show - but man, this particular set of opening credits set up some stuff they did not pay off. :D Lee and Sai are shown battling Pains in the streets, but Lee doesn't actually arrive back in the village until after the battle, and Sai is still running around the forest somewhere. Worse, Ino and Sakura never actually go toe-to-toe with Konan; in fact, Ino gets to do very little in this arc. I think that's the one that hurts.

Remembering Pain saying that unless you experience the same pain as someone else, you can't really understand them, Naruto shoves one of the chakra rods from Pain's body through his own hand. It's a really good moment illustrating the difference between the two of them. They both fundamentally believe in the need to empathise with someone's pain to be able to connect with them - but where Pain tries to make others hurt, to get them to understand him, Naruto voluntarily experiences others' pain so he can understand them.

(And then there's Sasuke, of course - very much a devotee of the Pain method, even if he wouldn't necessarily phrase it the same way. Sasuke really believes that he's suffered The Most, and no one else can understand because no one else has gone through exactly what he has. When someone comes close to that experience - like Kakashi - it doesn't count. So much of Sasuke's quest for revenge feels like he wants the world to see, to get his suffering. Because the position he's in has to be lonely.)

Sakura and Hinata's affectionate reunion when the latter wakes up makes me wish we'd gotten more interaction between these two before now. It's been virtually non-existent, and I think they could actually be great friends. We already know Sakura is drawn to quiet, dark-haired shinobi with ocular jutsu and overly demanding fathers. :D Seriously, though - Hinata is very sweet and supportive and also has a core of steel, and would be the kind of friend Sakura could use in her corner, and Sakura brings the kind of "excuse me, she asked for no pickles" energy that Hinata needs in her life.

"Why would [Naruto] do something so reckless?" Neji, have you... met Naruto?

I love the scene where Shikaku, Inoichi, and Ko catch up with Naruto and ask if he defeated Pain, and Naruto tells them quietly that it doesn't matter who won, before saying he's going on - alone - to talk to the real Pain. Inoichi is livid, raging that talking will do no good and that what Pain did to the village can never be forgiven. And Naruto yells back he knows, that he feels the same - but if they destroy Pain, all his minions, his village, what good will that do?? Naruto's never been one to enjoy his enemies' suffering; he'd much rather reach out a hand where he can. But here, it feels like both his anger and his empathy have reached a new level, and I really love the complexity of that.

I also love that while Inoichi is gung ho to follow Naruto, Shikaku's the one who's like, no, let the kid cook - because Shikamaru talks about how Naruto has something that makes Shikamaru want to follow him. And Shikaku knows his son rarely praises anyone. Shikaku has somehow evolved from the drunk Shikamaru was complaining about babysitting in his first appearance, to an attentive father who trusts his kid. (I don't know that we're supposed to see it as an evolution - it kind of feels more like a retcon - but I can't bring myself to object.)

At the climactic moment of the arc, when Naruto is choosing between vengeance and an attempt to build peace, during a series of emotionally resonant flashbacks that include the dead bodies of Naruto's mentors, we get a memory of Minato telling Naruto that Jiraiya entrusted him with all his hopes for peace - and this is the fucking image of Jiraiya the show chooses to freeze-frame on:

The fuck is that expression.

That said, this is still a baller scene. I especially love the little detail of Naruto admitting that when Jiraiya laid out his whole philosophy about peace, Naruto wasn't paying much attention - he was just happy Jiraiya was complimenting Naruto as his student. It was only after Jiraiya's death that Naruto realised the importance of that conversation. That's such a human thing, and it adds so much texture to a conversation that risks getting too abstract without these little character moments.

Also, Naruto's eyes - red with gold halos, with a cross-shaped pupil combining his nine-tails and sage modes - are such a cool effect. Especially the way both the nine-tails and sage appearances fade together, reverting back to Naruto's familiar blue, as he declares he's going to hear Nagato and Konan out before he decides.

Today's featurette is Ino and Sakura begging Tsunade to use her appearance transformation to show them what she looked like at their age. She does - and they immediately swarm her, demanding to know what the hell she did or ate or whatever to develop from a flat-chested teen into the busty hokage we know and love. Uhhhh, guys - you do remember that Tsunade always transforms her appearance, right? What makes you think any of these images are what she "really" looks like?

Next up is a little two-episode throwback to Team 7's genin days (which, honestly, must have felt like twisting the knife for people watching this when it originally came out, who would have thought Kakashi was dead!). Then we pick back up with the final four episodes of this arc. CHUUNIN NEXT TIME!

[decepticonsensual]

Stray Thoughts: Narutoblogging - Pain's Assault Arc, 10

Naruto's reaction to meeting his dad is perfection. It's so human and so Naruto. He's laughing and crying; he babbles; he's proud to learn he's the son of the Fourth Hokage; he blames Minato for everything and straight-up punches him in the stomach. It's all extremely relatable and I love him.

I do enjoy that Minato is kind of low-key sassy. The nine-tails is all, "Come here! I'll rip you limb from limb!" and Minato's just like "... then... no?" :D

Minato is surprised to learn that the Third Hokage never told Naruto fuck all about his own heritage... or even that Minato sealing the nine-tails inside him was a vote of confidence in Naruto's strength and ability to master that power. And of course, we already know the Third Hokage didn't even tell Naruto about the nine-tails in the first place. GodDAMMit, Hiruzen. What exactly was your plan, here? A big infodump when Naruto turned eighteen? Or were you just planning on telling him never??

(Kakashi and Jiraiya aren't blameless here, either, but I realise they may have been under the Third Hokage's orders to stay quiet about Naruto's parents, and might not have felt able to break that confidence after Hiruzen died.)

... I gotta say, I would be a lot more unnerved than Naruto is if I discovered my dead parent had been watching everything I did and experienced from inside my skull.

Ooooooh. So Minato got further than Jiraiya, actually identifying which Akatsuki sicced the nine-tails on the village back in the day. Presumably, he must have died before he could pass the information on - until now.

Minato is WAY more down on the entire ninja system than I expected. Like, I get that the way the authority figures in Naruto's life feel about shinobi-dom is often determined by where those figures come into Naruto's journey. Iruka and the Third Hokage are all rah-rah Will of Fire, self-sacrifice, yeah! because they're the earliest adults shaping Naruto's worldview. Kakashi has a grimmer take on the life of a shinobi, but still fundamentally believes in a ninja's duty to their kage and village, even if he thinks the system is fucked up. Jiraiya goes further into thinking the ninja world needs to actually change. And now, Naruto's ready to hear Minato's point of view - that the ninja world is the problem, the main obstacle to peace on earth. But it's still kind of a shock to hear from the mouth of a kage and war hero, someone who doesn't seem to have hesitated to kill while he was alive, and who's been held up since his death as THE epitome of ninjahood.

I melted at Minato's unconditional love for, and belief in, Naruto. This poor kid, who's always been determined, who's known he wants to be hokage since he was little and has refused to give up, is near breaking, wrestling with this incredible burden placed on him. And it's really sweet that at his lowest, Naruto feels safe enough with his father (even though they've just met) to blurt out, "I can't do it, I'm not smart, I'm not a great ninja" - and it's even sweeter the way Minato reassures him without hesitation. <3

Awwww, Naruto tearing up in relief when he learns he didn't accidentally kill anyone while in nine-tails mode. Naruto, bb.

Also, my heart aches for Neji, rushing back to the village only to find his cousin on the battlefield, near death.

Wait, the toad sage is only wounded? Is fucking ANYONE really dead in this arc??

(But also, awwww, Lee zeroing in on a tiny wounded toad, even when the village is in ruins. I'm reminded of Lee and the squirrel way back in the Forest of Death. Rock Lee, Disney prince. :D)

Pain reiterates his views on, well, pain, saying that if you don't share someone's pain, you can't understand them - but even if you do, you might never agree. Then he says that's why it's useless for Naruto to chase after Sasuke. Wow, Pain. First of all, rude; second of all... you might have a point. But still rude.

It kind of creeps up on you, but the number-one hyperactive knucklehead ninja has actually developed a head for strategy over the years. Naruto manages to instantly pull off what the Leaf Village's best minds have been trying to do for hours: he figures out where the real Pain is. By stabbing himself with one of the chakra transmitters and then using his sage mode to track where the chakra goes. Clever boy.

Naruto uses shadow-shuriken jutsu (hiding a second shuriken behind the first), which is a nice callback to the Land of Waves arc.

I love that Pain is gloating about Naruto dropping out of sage mode, counting on the assumption that once Naruto exhausts his top-level abilities, he can no longer go toe-to-toe with Pain - only to be taken down by the old Naruto classic of five thousand shadow clones to the face. :D

The next episode is apparently called "The Two Students", which I guess they decided was snappier than calling it "Hey Konan Is Here As Well But We've Decided Women Don't Count".

Today's featurette is Guy interviewing Hinata! He rattles off a few factoids - she loves cinnamon rolls and sweet bean paste and her hobby is pressed-flower art - before deciding to do a hip, youthful interview off the cuff, and asking Hinata if she's in love. When she blushes, Guy tries to "support" her to confess her feelings to camera - which causes Hinata to panic so much she shoves Guy through a wall. :D 10/10, I want Guy to just be Hinata's relationship coach all the time. I know Hinata's done the actual love confession now, but I would seriously have watched an entire arc of Guy trying to help her win Naruto's heart, while Hinata keeps bottling it and then freaking out and throwing Guy through large objects, off bridges, etc. :D

[jiiin22]

the bravest human

[greelin]

sorry for not answering messages for three thousand years i have. Stew. in place of a brain. you know how it is

[decepticonsensual]

Stray Thoughts: Narutoblogging - Pain's Assault Arc, 9

Just saying it now: I really hope we get at least a moment for Tsunade to react to Shizune's death. The show gives a lot of focus to students mourning for their senseis - Shikamaru (and Ino and Choji to an extent) with Asuma; Naruto with Jiraiya; Naruto and Choji with Kakashi. But the even greater tragedy of a sensei losing a student to death gets very little play - partly because it's so rare, sure, but even when it happens. (Minato had, uh. Less of a reaction to Obito's death than I'd expected. I know ninja have all kinds of taboos against emotional expression, but still.) And more than that, scenes focusing on the relationships among the women in the cast are vanishingly rare. Tsunade had better get at least as much time for her grief for Shizune, the young woman who was by her side every day for over a decade, as she got for her grief for Jiraiya, the one-time teammate she hadn't seen in about a decade, is all I'm saying.

Apparently, Hinata has a deep relationship with the member of the Hyuuga clan who came to check in on her after the village got wrecked. It... kinda seems like maybe he basically raised her, with her father being so emotionally absent? That's a pretty significant backstory to suddenly drop in, but I'm glad we're getting more Hinata lore!

Man, these bullies in Hinata's flashback must have a death wish to be messing with the scion of the Hyuuga clan. (I know, Hinata's dad would probably just scoff and tell her she deserved what she got for not fighting back, but the bullies don't know that!)

Hinata finally gets another badass moment, swooping in to single-handedly protect Naruto from Pain! And confess her love at the same time - which, I can't say I'm entirely sold on these two as a couple, but that's still a pretty gutsy move. You GO, Hinata. I don't think I could have managed the love confession at sixteen, never mind the ninja battle. :D

Hinata apparently has a new jutsu where her fists are lions made of lighting. I do enjoy the fact that the non-Team Kakashi ninja teens being out of focus most of the time means that they can surprise us with these incredible powers they learned offscreen - it's delightful. :)

Okay, Hinata landing a punch on Pain is satisfying as hell. Even if it is justified by Nagato's sudden coughing fit causing a blip in chakra transmission. :D

Tiny!Naruto's super special ninja ability was to use his shadow clone jutsu... which he was still absolutely pants at. And then, while his opponent was distracted by his comedically terrible clone, to jump up and beat the shit out of them. That is honestly amazing, no notes.

The show gives us a number of flashbacks to Naruto encouraging or inspiring Hinata, but I think one of the most heartstring-tugging parallels is the one it doesn't flash back to here: Naruto watching the bout between Neji and Hinata, and yelling at Hinata to get back up and keep fighting, versus Naruto now, quietly begging for Hinata to stop as she staggers to her feet to continue the battle.

There's another parallel subtly in here as well: that moment where the antagonist goes why do you keep trying to protect your friend from me, when you know I'm so much more powerful than you? Gaara has that moment with Sakura trying to shield Naruto and Sasuke during the Konoha Crush arc, and Pain has it with Hinata shielding Naruto now. But where it made Gaara hesitate, and then unexpectedly take Sakura out of the fight without hurting her, it seems to make Pain extra cruel.

There's a beautiful moment where Hinata - who's trying desperately to pull the blades that are pinning Naruto out of him - looks up and meets his eyes, and smiles, echoing Naruto as she says that never going back on her word is her ninja way, too... and then, from Naruto's point of view, the sound cuts out completely, and he watches with horror as Pain sends Hinata's body hurtling through the air. It drives home that moment of brutality in an already brutal fight.

Today's featurette is just a little extra flashback scene of Hinata trying and not quite mustering up the courage to talk to Naruto, combined with her voiceover, saying she's sorry she wasn't able to thank him for saving her. Awwww.

Naruto going full nine-tails cloak is even more intimidating than ever, with his body separating and flowing together in eerie ways... but then he picks up a brick and uses it to beat Pain into the ground like a nail, and it is unfortunately mood-breakingly funny. :D

But the mood reasserts itself fucking quickly when Naruto starts to manifest nine-tailed-fox bones (a skull, two limbs, and the beginnings of a spine). This isn't just the nine-tails' chakra emerging. The physical Tailed Beast itself is trying to enter the world, and it's a little terrifying to watch.

The animation style of the fight suddenly changes with Naruto's transformation. It's sort of - sketchy and loose, with characters warping in and out of shape. The show's used this technique before, but never for this long and not generally during serious moments. I almost wonder if this bit is going to turn out to be a dream or genjutsu, or sort of metaphorical?

Naruto breaking the necklace that keeps the nine-tails contained is quite an oh, shit moment. Because of what it means right now, but also because it implies that he was always capable of breaking it during his previous rampages - but he didn't. Whether that was because some deep-down part of Naruto didn't want to lose control, but that part is gone now; or whether it was simply that his nine-tails form used to operate on pure instinct, but now he's plotting - it's all pretty unnerving.

We get a brief glimpse of Sai, Anko, and Tenzou on a mission to try and track down Kabuto, and goddamn, I want that filler arc! C'mon - Orochimaru's former student, his former experiment, and the spy who tried to infiltrate his organisation, all hunting Orochimaru's former right-hand man who now contains what's left of his soul? Why couldn't we have had that instead of Bubbles Sasuke Tries To Come To Terms With A Teaching Career?

(I actually did like Bubbles Sasuke but this team up is too good.)

Like Hidan, Pain has now lost most of the upper portion of his robes. Unlike Hidan, Pain does not appear to be doing this on purpose. :D

"The Sage of Six Paths is said to have created the moon." THE FUCKING??? MOON?????

I love the way the external horror of Naruto's transformation into full nine-tails form contrasts with the very quiet scene inside his mind, where Naruto is... well, he's what Iruka was, what the Third Hokage saw in him. A child, curled into a little ball of pain, begging for someone to help him. And the nine-tails itself, after all of the previous scenes where it's been doing the full-on give into your hatred and join me on the Dark Side spiel - here, at its moment of triumph, it's soft and reassuring, almost like a parent. It's okay. You're doing fine. Come here.

(The animation is lovely here, too. Naruto's seal turning into a black hole, a mirror of the one that Pain created to trap him... but instead of pulling everything into itself, this one is pouring darkness out, until it blots out the sunset colours of the water in Naruto's head. It's great.)

And then Naruto's real parent comes to save the day! Okay, Minato's appearance here is pretty cool. The possibility of this was planted alllllll the way back in the Konoha Crush arc, when the Third Hokage explained that the Reaper Seal also seals the caster's own soul, and to see it pay off now is honestly great. (Also, fuck me, but after Jiraiya's death, Tsunade's near-death, and Kakashi's looks-like-death, I just really needed Naruto to have some kind of nurturing figure in this moment who wasn't the fucking fox.)

New closing credits! I guess it was a bit tasteless to have the ones of picnicking-and-bicycle-riding Hinata while she's hovering close to death. :D These are pretty, but fairly basic: Sakura wanders by the seashore at night, against a backdrop of fireworks and wind turbines, and then her hat blows off. Which makes this, along with the Hinata end credits, another entry in the Women Experience Minor Inconveniences While Enjoying Nature Cinematic Universe.

I'm sorry, I'm still not over ninja made the moon.