“All paths lead back to soup.”

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@defragmentary
“All paths lead back to soup.”
I heard Kurt's a tough boy
Like... physically? ‘Cause can confirm. I’m like at least 85% shredded. Mildly minced.
I heard that Kurt is a Power Ranger
Hey, c’mon, y’can’t just out a dude like that, secret identities and al’ that.
Send an anonymous rumor about my muse to my inbox for my muse’s reaction!
"So lemme get this straight. Y'want me to go find some random woman nobody knows, possibly an Affinite, definitely dangerous, an' jus' ask her what she's up to?"
"That is about the jist of it, yes." Perion confirmed, eyes closed as he prepared for the complaint that was inevitably going to follow.
"Aight then, sure thing, lemme just whip out th' ol' Anti-Affinite gloves an-- oh wait, I ain't got those, I got a pair've regular gloves an' a nice-lookin' uniform that'll probably get shot t'shit." "And also a Pokémon team entirely comprised of Ground-types."
"...aight. Yeah. An' that too." Kurt admitted, annoyed that Perion was actually starting to make sense. "Y'couldn't send another Affinite to deal with this? I kinda gotta start training fer the physicals if I wanna get this new job off th' ground..." "Unfortunately, Aegis might be asked to help with this sort of thing, but we don't have enough members that we can just send out a perfect counter-type to every Affinite that turns up. She's thought to be Electric-type, and if that's true, the closest we have to a counter would just be another Electric-type. Letting something like this come down purely to skill could well end in disaster, especially if a confrontation occurs inside a city's limits."
"Augh, fine, aight, y'talkin' sense, I get it." Kurt sighed. "I'll get on it, but I'm tellin' ya I think there's a better fit somewhere."
Without another word, Kurt left the office. To say that he left in a bad mood would be a severe understatement; that much Perion could tell easily.
"I sure hope whatever instructor that boy gets knows what they're getting into..."
For a moment he could have sworn he heard the call of his people.
The 30th Icon In Your Folder Is Your Muse’s Reaction To Reading A Dirty Fanfic Of Themselves and Another Muse!
...did something just crawl down the side of Aegis?
“I’m gonna end up as pink whether I want to or not, ain’t I.”
Victory Road
“Damn it…!” Eos yelled, calling her back into her ball. “I’m sorry, Voltaire, get back for now.”
Perion was informed. That much was a relief. He could rest a little easier knowing that Perion was sending help. Still... things seemed bad. The Noivern must have been a foot taller than average, and in addition to that, its muscle structure seemed far more robust. Had it really been the effect of the Mega Stones?
It was a hypothesis for another day. As Kurt glanced back at the battle, it was obvious that Eos's Emolga stood no chance. Not that she wasn't strong, but in terms of sheer base stats, the other Pokémon outmatched it in every way. It seemed the Noivern was planning on attacking Eos directly a second time. "Evactuate everyone?" he muttered to himself. "Shit... Eos, don't make me regret leavin' you!"
“…Well, in all fairness, I guess it was Hydreigon we were complaining about. So I shouldn’t judge him too much.”
“Feel free to trade places anytime you like!”
Victory Road
Gripping Aetha’s empty Pokéball in her hand tightly, her resolve renewed. There was no way that a Deo was going to mess this up.
Meanwhile, in the opposite direction, Kurt continued his search, heading ever-deeper into the caverns that were considered the greatest challenge to trainers.
In truth, it wasn't so quite so terrible. The wild Pokémon were fairly strong, but anyone even remotely close to being up to the challenge of the Elite Four would have no problem taking on the odd Graveller or Zweilous. The real issue was the number of other trainers that had set up position in the caves. Everyone from backpack-carrying tourists, to the most hardened ace trainers flocked to the path. Thankfully, most of them paid attention when he told them he wasn't here for the challenge.
Victory Road
“If it’s only been seen outside at night, it’s probably mostly nocturnal. So if it’s here, then we can take it by surprise, and keep it in one place, instead of having to chase it all over the region.”
Kurt let out a short laugh, and grinned widely. "Nice t'see ya thinkin' this stuff through." he complimented, before turning his eyes up to the ceiling of the cavern. "So, all we gotta do is hope it's in one'a Victory Road's caves and not some other place." "Well it's not much... but I did check with a friend before setting anything in stone." Eos said, following Kurt's motion and scanning the roof herself. "She knows the area a little better than me. The largest caves in this place are all on Victory Road."
"Aight, cool, so we're not on a wild goose chase at least." Kurt nodded. "Well, don't see anything obvious here, but we ain't too deep in. Still a lotta light in this place. If we wanna find something nocturnal that nobody can say f'sure even exists, we're probably lookin' at the darkest caves in this place. So, split up? We can take a couple'a paths and keep in touch on th' radios if we find anythin'." "Yep, sounds good to me!" Eos chimed, as Voltaire hopped down onto her shoulder. "Meet up with you when we find it!"
Victory Road
No, the more pressing matter was the Pokémon that the rumours had led her to search out. And it was to that ends that she had asked Kurt for his help.
"So, caves." her companion said, holding the small pack of supplies he was carrying over his shoulder. "Lots 'n' lots of big caves." With Voltaire sat on her head, Eos restrained herself from nodding only at the last second, much to little Pokémon's relief. "Yep. Lots of big caves." she repeated. "There's a couple of clearings, a small lake near the end, but other than that... this entire path is pretty much just caves." "Exciting shit." Kurt muttered sarcastically. "So, what we meant to be lookin' for, exactly?
I tried to warn y’all.
Homecoming
“I don’t remember that door being there.”
It took a moment for Kurt to respond, but when he did, it was not the response she had expected. "Well yer about to remember it a whole lot better." he said, tossing the Pokéball and releasing his partner from inside of it. The large, crimson-bodied creature formed before them, its long jaw stretching slightly, as though it hadn't been sent out for some time. "Alright Krooks, let's get that door open for the Princess, shall we?" Kurt said, cracking his knuckles and donning a pair of armoured gloves, presumably made for handling sharp or heavy materials without the wearer risking accidents.
"I don't recognize that Pokémon..." Mene said, as the pair moved over to the door and began to attempt to force it open. "How come you've never used it before?" "'Cause I never had 'im before." Kurt answered simply. "He used t'belong to Selene, back when she was training to be a Gym Leader." "Then... why do you have him now?" "Honestly the answer's gonna sound kinda stupid." Kurt admitted, taking a break while the Krookodile continued. "Y'sure you actually care?" Mene nodded.
"Well long-story-short, I had a talk with a Ranger a while ago about Pokémon that'd be useful in the field. Figured those kinda guys know what's up there, right?" he explained, closing his eyes and leaning his head back in recollection.
"Nice dude. Didn't judge much. Anyway, point is that his ideas on good Pokémon for that stuff matched up pretty well with the Ground-Types that Selene used t'train for that. They've been in her PC for so long I figured they reminded her too much of th' past. So, I asked about 'em, and got 'em transfered over to me, 'cause if I figure if I'm gonna be takin' an active role in keepin' you guys safe and trackin' down assholes causin' trouble then that's exactly what I'm gonna need."
Homecoming
Despite her misgivings, she had to admit that anything they could potentially learn from this so-called abandoned facility would help to prevent that.
"Alright, we should be coming up on the facility soon." Kurt said, snapping the girl out of her thoughts. "...you alright there?" "Yeah." Mene answered, shrugging her misgivings off as baggage and taking a breath. "I am. I just want it over with." "Yeah, you 'n' me both."
It didn't take them long to get inside. Evidently, as Hiens were leaving they felt no need to secure the facility heavily, relying instead on the forested area around it providing a natural camoflage to keep people away. It seemed that the facility wasted no space on an entry hall or anything of the like, but in its place was a long corridor that seemed almost endless. No doorways could be seen on either side of the room, leaving the only option to head further in. Kurt stepped out in front of Mene, turning to her with a nod, before taking the lead down the rest of the hallway.
At first glance it seemed as though the entire facility had been cleared. Nothing of any value had been left behind. It wasn't surprising, really. Leaving anything provided a risk of illegal operations being traced back to the Hiens Group, which had a reputation to keep up.
"Well, they get shit done fast, I guess." Kurt sighed, throwing his arms down to his side. "Best we can probably do is find a computer somewhere and hope there's some data we can restore on it." No response. "Hey, Mene--" Kurt said, turning around, freezing in his tracks when he saw the girl. Her eyes were staring intently through the glass of a metal door. Kurt had looked briefly through it himself, and it only took him a moment to realize why she was so fixated. "...shit, you recognize it, don't you?"