bruh

i need friends

[belikememes]

Miss My Bros

[just-shower-thoughts]

No matter how well they pick up sound, your ears are great at collecting your tears when you are lying on your back.

[whitepeopletwitter]

[depressedsnek]

So I went to the doctors the other day and

What the fuck

Why do they have faces

These are candles

Help?

[whitepeopletwitter]

[pukicho]

toby maguire really WAS 63 years old when he played spiderman

[mechanikul]

no he was 26

[pukicho]

Spiderman is supposed to be 10

[dangergays]

he’s like 15

[pukicho]

Because of your attitude, he’s 9 now

[depressedsnek]

So I was learning German, and apparently there was a new update or something because

WHAT

WHAT DO YOU MEAN ‘FOR NOW’???!!

[depressedsnek]

I’m so goddamn tired

I forgot my bra.

I’m at school.

Please just kill me.

[depressedsnek]

Sometimes I scroll through my old screenshots and question my sanity

Like this

What is this and why did I decide to screenshot it at 3:22 in the morning??

[depressedsnek]

rock

[just-shower-thoughts]

One day you’re gonna go to bed and not wake up. Or one day you’ll wake up and not go to bed.

[depressedsnek]

WHERE IS THE HAM

sometimes i question my sanity

[depressedsnek]

I just got to hold a (very active) cornsnake and I CANT THIS IS AMAZING AAAAA-

[depressedsnek]

When I was young, I was taller than all of my friends, so I used their heads as armrests

Now they’re taller than me and I make sure to watch their arms for any movement towards my head

Being previously tall has made me cautious around tall people’s arms

[depressedsnek]

I was called a dinosaur the other day at school (‘why is this dinosaur here?’)

I’ve decided to take it as a compliment

I am now a large angry lizard

fear me

[depressedsnek]

School hasn’t even started yet and I already want to go home

why am I so tired

[depressedsnek]

So I just found out that the type of snake I wanted as a pet is actually illegal in my state and I want to cry but my mom is home and I don’t want her to worry