Welcome to Desirtips! The first blog dedicated to tips and conversation around Desirdae labels.
Desirdae is a term to describe the desire to be something that one may not be or to be it in a different way.
You can call us Ghost, and we're the system behind the blog. You can use they/them for us. Our hosts are Toby and Vampdog
We answer requests for transition tips and tips on coping with not transitioning. We talk about ethics and occasionally talk about ourself. We also will reclaim ANY existing "Mutt" term to be specific to mixedrace people. Feel free to request any of those.
We are strictly against rad//queers, transids, and pro and neutral contact paraphiles
We are also strictly pro problematic factive and believe they have the right to be open and honest about their identities no matter how much someone doesn't like it. Pro contradictory labels (vampdog is a pansexual lesboy and cistransfluid), pro discussion of transandrophobia, and PRO PARAPHILIA. We ask that if you disagree on any of the above topics, you do not interact.
There's a lot of stuff that we don't know anything about and we're not going to pretend we do.
While we are 18, nearly every member actively running this blog is under that mentally. Interact with this blog as if it is run by minors because it is.
We are also just one human. We don't know the nuanced ethic of everything. Nor can we do everything all at once. Be mindful of our abilities
We won't do tips relating to
Any non-English term that the definition isn't a widely known English term. If I don't know what the term means without having to google it, I don't feel im qualified to speak on it. ESPECIALLY if it has to do with another culture
Terms relating to ethnicity or culture. We are too racially mixed to know enough about ethnic or cultured nuances, sadly
The following fictions:
Coffin on Andy and Leyley (?) - RQ trauma
Any vivziepop work - Vivzie is a blatant tranandrophobe along with all of the other bad things and you cant seperate the artist from the art when the art is littered with all the bad intentions + RQ trauma
There is an anti radqueer community that has been somewhat flooded with gore (four posts, three are the same gif, but still)
I'm not back from my very long break, but I can't sit and let gore just sit in the community and possibly give the community a bad look.
I don't expect anyone to be able to handle gore. The things in the community aren't the most horrible atrocities that could ever happen to a person, but it's still gore. However, if anyone can stomach it, I ask that you help me report it to Tumblr as the owner of the group is inactive.
People in the antiradqueer subreddit are really hating that I said pedophilia doesn't equal predatory and it really goes to show that as bad as the radqueers are, we can't save anyone unless we teach the people on *our* side that their bigotry and ableism is the majority of the reason that community exists in the first place
I don't know how many of you are actively helping against the "Wplace radqueer spot" but I need you guys to start actually drawing things. Not just erasing theirs. And NOT JUST FLAGS
Most of these people have absolutely no lives, and are perfectly willing to sit around putting back every flag that we erase, but if we start drawing actual drawings over their things, I had an experience where one of them ACTUALLY HELPED me finish my thing that I drew right over theirs. It gets rid of their stuff AND doesn't leave a big gap where they can draw it right back again.
Draw stuff OVER them. Draw BIG things over them. Cover the nasty flags up completely. Draw my little ponies, draw adventure time characters, draw your OCs, draw... Whatever. It's easier to keep an eye out to make sure they don't grief your art than it is to constantly fight them over hiding theirs
Share this (And DONT share Publically the link to the radqueer area)
I don't know how many of you are actively helping against the "Wplace radqueer spot" but I need you guys to start actually drawing things. Not just erasing theirs. And NOT JUST FLAGS
Most of these people have absolutely no lives, and are perfectly willing to sit around putting back every flag that we erase, but if we start drawing actual drawings over their things, I had an experience where one of them ACTUALLY HELPED me finish my thing that I drew right over theirs. It gets rid of their stuff AND doesn't leave a big gap where they can draw it right back again.
Draw stuff OVER them. Draw BIG things over them. Cover the nasty flags up completely. Draw my little ponies, draw adventure time characters, draw your OCs, draw... Whatever. It's easier to keep an eye out to make sure they don't grief your art than it is to constantly fight them over hiding theirs
Share this (And DONT share Publically the link to the radqueer area)
thats because it was renamed to punkqueer i believe!
Hey! I saw the link that you shared in my other ask but I do want to ask just before I go pushing links onto my page and because I didn't know enough about the critical rq thing when it existed, do we know if there's any solid proof that this and that were the exact same? I would love to use it as further proof that some radqueers really do need terms that help them find a way out, especially because it's specifically denying any relations to radqueer /now/, but I would hate to say something about it and be wrong
I'm so happy I found desirdae (& other identiora things) because before that I had what could be boiled down into two options
transintersex is just. God where do I even Begin. So many issues (if you're not aware though, I'd say look up the word on Tumblr since many intersex folks have already talked about it)
But salmacian, altersex and etcetera kind of just worsened my dysphoria when even just considering using them. And bigenital is completely inaccurate for what I desire
So yeah desirdae and such have kinda given me a lot of comfort. That's a yay
The radqueer community termed and then immediately went back on a concept called "critical radqueer"
I'm not able to find a coining post or anyone talking about the specific lists of beliefs, and I only remember one from a screenshot I saw maybe two or three days ago:
only supportive of some transids. Trace, trans abled, and I believe transharmful labels were not supported
I BELIEVE it was also anti contact and anti people who are pro/neu contact for contact-harmful paraphilias
I /do/ remember that the term really did just seem to me to be radinclusive with extra steps, so I was hoping maybe we could start up a conversation about this
Now as I've said, the community seemed to have gone back on the term immediately, but, as radinclusives, what are our opinions on the critical radqueer idea?
Obviously I understand that's a hard question to ask because I have you like two points, but, if the idea of a "critical radqueer" is essentially just a radinclusive who calls themself radqueer, or something very similar, how do we feel about them? And bigger, should we as radinclusives and anti radqueers start pushing out terms towards that community to try to pull people out of it?
Personally, I think it's important to note that even if most radqueers didnt like or support of the term, someone coined it. Someone felt the need to coin a term that basically meant radinclusive, likely because they felt uncomfortable with the community they were around. I know I felt that way when I was in that community. And I think that slowly, surely, if more terms pop up that can work as bridges between radqueers that don't like that community and those of us who are radinclusive, we might be able to get more people out safely.
Hi! I was wondering if you have tips on coping with your appearance not matching those around you and your culture is different from their culture. I think they are beautiful and see myself as lesser than. I don’t want to be them, bc there is no way i can change my race, but i do want to feel comfortable in my own skin. I am learning about their culture and food and customs and i started believing in their belief system too ! But i am my own person. And i should not be nervously trying to get them to like me because there is nothing wrong with me at the end of the day.
Hi! As we've already said, we aren't answering asks at the moment, but beyond that, this is blatantly stated as something we don't answer in our intro post
This disability pride month I encourage all to open themselves up to help speak for those with paraphilic disorders and defend them. It's not easy, but people need to be educated. This month is the absolute hardest in many, because even "anti ableist" disabled people turn around and get hella ableist when it comes to a paraphile
do you have any tips for desirworshipped beings? it's just really weird when my source was admired by humans/was a sort of mythological figure or urban legend to humans and I'm not that anymore
Make a discord server (or other community) with either friends or people who may have interest in being a follower. You can set this community up "like a church" with different levels of followers and even other deities. It could be a "roleplay your desirdentity" place, where to get in, they have to roleplay with you as their god. Or something much more specific to you if you have friends willing to do that for you
^ You can do the same, but all of the roles can joking. People who are the most in on it can "jokingly" call you the server god. Like a big inside joke
Make a social media account for it. If you can market yourself right, you can find people who will follow you like worshippers
possibly controversial, but I don't find fults and neoreligions to be inherently harmful. Don't promote harm, be explicitly against harm and dont take things too far and thats a valid option
Look into manifestation and other spitiual things like shifting. Not as big on being worshipped specifically, but it will make you believe in your power if its something you decide to do
Make a tumblr blog that offers a service that is themed around the worship of you. The your "followers" could "pray" for a "blessing" from you, the prayer being in the form of an ask in the ay you ask them to send in and the blessing being things like stimboards or flag coinings or whatever you're able to do
As always. Creation. Write, draw, roleplay, whatever works best for you.
Keep in mind that this is just my opinion!! And my experience while using the app. If you saw the update, our fictive Angel dust is taking over the account, but there is still some things I want to say about it.
If you saw me last post I hate and I mean HATE how there is no way to much your post goes out to the right people. No hashtags, nothing!
But I mainly want to talk about the antis, apparently if you don't agree with them you shouldn't exist. Apparently if someone threatened you they're just trying to stop you from "promoting any harm". Not only that even if you join a community that says it welcomes everyone their antis in it that are trying to force you out of it. For example: there's a self shipping community and all I see is just anti telling radqueers or pro shippers that they are not allowed in here, and to leave. MEANWHILE IT SAYS THAT THE COMMUNITY WELCOMES EVERYONE!!! You can't tell someone to leave a community that you never made. And apparently what anti-rp we'll say that being a rad queer means that you support r+pe, child abuse, groom children, Nazism, and so much so much more that I don't even think I can see on Tumblr because that tells stupidly crazy they are!!
I've seen a post saying how radqueers should only post stuff about being rq in the rq community on emo!. Which is completely unfair if we are not allowed to express rq Pride outside of the communities we built then you shouldn't be able to talk anti-rq BS outside of your communities. I will find this equally fair but we all know who's not going to listen.
I'm actually going to change this up a bit, treat this post as a "heads up" to what to expect if you ever plan on downloading emo! I'm really happy to see more radqueers on the app, and I hope to see more especially ones who've been in the community for the longest now to show people outside of the community the truth about being a radqueer, and hopefully people will understand and not listen to antis and their lies.
Like I said this is only my opinion and based off of my experience I'm not in charge of the account anymore angel dust is, but I feel like this is worth renting about.
Lil error on this one, the selfship community was a mix up on a different app I was using lol. They were familiar so it was a simple mistake, please forgive me, and ignore that part.
Either way, antis are still focusing rq in small places, not letting us express ourselves, harass us, and are nothing but assholes.
I'm the person you lied about. You said you made an error but didn't say what in. I'm asking you to go back and fully tell them what misinformation you spread because you now know it wasn't true instead of "oops. Point 3 was wrong actually. Ignore that"
I already said that I made a error when it came to the self-ship community part. I didn't mean to spread "misinformation" I just got my info and sources mixed up. It was nothing but a mistake, I already called out myself on it, and said to ignore that mistake. Simple and easy. -kiwi