Strawberry

I guess everyone needs an outlet. This is mine. Everyone mentioned in this diary is renamed. This isn't a portrayal of reality, but instead my own portrayal of my experience. Read if you'd like to darlings. Lots of love, Strawberry.

[dimensionallove-blog]

I'm not going to understand, and you're not going to care.

Random Things Strawberry Says

Because sometimes I’ll have the inclination to write song lyrics, or poetry, or random thoughts, and you can either stand by my side, or you can ignore me. 

“You’re not going to understand, and I’m not going to care,” is the reverse of this. In reference to everything I will end up holding back. It’s not necessary to know exactly what I’m talking about, as long as it can be relatable in some abstract way.

~Strawberry, xoxo.

Follow these kinds of confessions with #strawberrywords.

[dimensionallove-blog]

Introducing Lime, Strawberry’s crush. He remains oblivious - mistaken under the impression that Mango likes Strawberry and that Strawberry is attracted to Mango. 

Lime is only half right. Mango told Lime he didn’t like Strawberry anymore, and as everyone here probably has already gathered: Strawberry is attracted to Lime.

Strawberry has spoken to Mango about only being platonic friends, since it is really hard for her to actually develop feelings for anyone (she doesn’t quite understand it, but she feels a spark when she is around someone she could connect with). As it is, Strawberry constantly looks for reasons not to like Lime because of her trauma.

Since developing PTSD, Strawberry has had a fear of guys. It can be triggered from time to time, and it’s very unpleasant. But Strawberry finds herself developing crushes on guys, and so is left in this awkward position where she wants to conquer her fear, though she is terrified that she’ll be betrayed again.

Anyway, Mango found out that Strawberry has a crush on Lime (through a guess of all things - since Strawberry wasn’t exactly planning on mentioning her crush to anyone), and being a good supportive friend, he decides to help Strawberry.

Things probably won’t go as intended...

~ Strawberry, xoxo.

Follow the rest of the story as it updates at #strawberryconfessions.

[dimensionallove-blog]

So my name isn’t really Strawberry, but let’s pretend it is. I mean, why not? It has a nice ring to it. It’s nice to meet you all. Whoever you are.

Firstly, I imagine some of you will tell me how childish it is to keep some sort of anonymous online record of these things. I’m not doing it for you guys though, I’m doing it for me. And I’m making it public because I truly believe that emotions don’t need to be hidden from the world (which only makes me a major hypocrite in real life - where I avoid feeling those same emotions). This is sort of a blog to encourage myself that it’s okay. A self-inspiration blog, if you will.

Secondly, my life is probably very boring. But I’m really the only person that gets to judge that. I mean, no matter how accurately I manage to represent my reality in this blog, there will always be things that I end up missing or leave out intentionally. I reserve the right to keep details to myself. I also refuse to pay attention to judgement and criticism. I want to keep things optimistic here. Sunshine and smiles. I’ll acknowledge my mistakes to myself and anyone else who needs to hear an apology. Please be considerate of my life.

Thirdly, I’d like to thank anyone who reads my posts. I may not always show my appreciation, but I would certainly feel it. I’m a little bad at giving and receiving affection, but that’s something I’d like to improve on.

Fourth, PTSD has had a major influence in my life over the last thirteen years. I’m finally at the period of my life where I am in a position to really battle against it. Which is so exciting for me, but I don’t particularly want to trigger anyone, so anything that I think could be triggering would be labelled as #trigger, so that you guys can block it.

And so the story begins...

~Strawberry, xoxo.

Follow the story as it updates under the tag #strawberryconfessions.