I ❤️ disease

diseases love me, I fear women

[diseasegirl5000]

anyone wanna date so we can do cute fall things together like eat leaves and get seasonal depression?

[diseasegirl5000]

if i was a worm i'd be a tapeworm cuz u know i always eat

[diseasegirl5000]

i actually used to think tumblr was made up by gay people

[diseasegirl5000]

i've decided i understand nothing about people or social situations, but i do have vast knowledge of soil bacteria and crop management techniques, and that's basically the same thing anyways

[diseasegirl5000]

someone needs to study how stepping foot into a college campus immediately gives you pink eye, a cold, and 2 STDs (random, you don't get to choose)

[diseasegirl5000]

so i was joking when i said this but ive been back on campus for 2 days and im already sick

[diseasegirl5000]

syphilis would be such a good name if it wasn't a deadly venereal disease

[diseasegirl5000]

the biggest and most devastating food poisoning outbreak in recent US history was the 1993 e. coli O157:H7 outbreak in hamburgers from Jack In The Box restaurants. also i think i might be asexual actually

[diseasegirl5000]

this outbreak also resulted in one of the largest personal injury settlements in history, as well as a huge class-action lawsuit. I suggest reading the book "Poisoned" by Jeff Benedict if you want to learn more

[diseasegirl5000]

the biggest and most devastating food poisoning outbreak in recent US history was the 1993 e. coli O157:H7 outbreak in hamburgers from Jack In The Box restaurants. also i think i might be asexual actually

[diseasegirl5000]

hormones? yeah they tend to do that

[diseasegirl5000]

About 80 million microbes are swapped every time you kiss someone, and they actually are beneficial to building your own immune response and body microbiome. So what I'm saying is I need someone to kiss me. For immune system purposes of course.

[diseasegirl5000]

this would genuinely work to trap me. i would crawl right in there to see that cool disease

[diseasegirl5000]

"but diseasegirl5000", you say, "there is no one interacting with your posts! you are talking to the void!"

and to that i say excuse you, that's rude. can't a girl talk to herself in peace anymore??

[diseasegirl5000]

on a serious note, polio is coming back around the world. we were so close to eradicating it like smallpox, but COVID interrupted vaccine programs, and there is a growing anti-vax movement that is impeding progress. medical misinformation is so rampant and so damaging!

[diseasegirl5000]

someone needs to study how stepping foot into a college campus immediately gives you pink eye, a cold, and 2 STDs (random, you don't get to choose)

[diseasegirl5000]

disease update: CDC says that small turtles are giving people salmonella. just the small ones. bastards

[diseasegirl5000]

and small is <4 inches. idk personally i think 4 in is pretty big. almost too big. who needs a turtle that big??

[diseasegirl5000]

disease update: CDC says that small turtles are giving people salmonella. just the small ones. bastards

[diseasegirl5000]

90% of my diet is applesauce and the other 10% is Monster Ultra Peachy Keen Edition ™

that being said this is now officially an applesauce stan blog. who cares about diseases anymore