Just cause they save the world doesn't mean they can handle life

Welcome to a world of heroes, villains and everything in between!

[disfunctional-superheroes-tm]

Fillipe Part 1

There was something weird about being in a supermarket at 2 am. Part of him wasn’t sure whether he was really awake or this was just one of those dreams that haunt you for years to come because they aren’t really nightmares but create this weird feeling.

Fillipe was alone in the aisle, standing in front of the ramen and couldn't decide. Why was he even here? What had happened to his shirt? Hadn't he already gone grocery shopping yesterday at a more reasonable hour? Wait. His shirt. He was pretty sure he had worn a shirt when he had left the house. Why wasn’t he wearing his shirt anymore? He looked around in the hope that maybe it was just lying around somewhere (it wasn’t) and sighed in disappointment. Something buzzed in his shoe. Fillipe vaguely remembered putting his phone in his boot so it wouldn’t be damaged in the fight. It took him a moment to catch up with his thoughts. Fight. He had been in a fight. Oh. Ooooh! The realization of how he had ended up here, why his head hurt so much and even why he was half-naked hit him like a baseball bat in the stomach. And yes, he was allowed to make that comparison. It had happened.

He wondered if this would become a normal occurrence. Maybe this wasn’t the best career choice. Dragging his feet he made his way towards the exit. Only outside with the chilling night air in his lungs, he noticed that he had grabbed a carton of ice cream on his way out. Raspberry. He didn’t like raspberry. He hadn’t paid for this. Not like it was the worst crime he had committed that night.

Tired and with the thought that he should probably call in sick for today nagging at the back of his mind, the young villain sauntered through the dark streets towards home.  

[disfunctional-superheroes-tm]

Hayes Part 1

“Hi, my name is Hayes without a B and I am here today because I have been homeless and jobless for...” He hesitated for a moment trying to find the right words. “A few years now.”

“Hello Hayes”, to rest of the group responded in a chorus.

‘A couple of years’ was good. It was still kind of a lie but not as bad as anything else he could have come up with that quickly. He could hardly tell the truth. If he told them that he had lost his house during... What did they can it these days? World War 1? Yeah, that was the name, he was sure. If he told them about that they would think he was crazy for sure. The last time people had thought he was crazy he had ended up on trial for being a witch. Being burned alive hadn’t been a nice experience, even for a probably immortal in a fireproof suit. Humans hadn’t changed as much as they liked to believe. Only their methods were different. Just because it wouldn’t kill him didn’t mean he liked having to hide for a couple of centuries until they forgot.

The thing with his probably immortality had gotten him in trouble before, he had lived with it for years now but he still couldn’t understand it. Based on the statistic evidence he was in fact immortal. But how could he ever be sure? It didn’t feel right to call himself immortal when he had no idea whether it was true or not. So he had settled for ‘probably immortal’.

“Hayes?” a woman sitting across from him caught his attention. She had brown long dreadlocks (why humans liked long hair so much would forever be a mystery to him), a small frame and had small tired eyes. Hayes couldn’t remember her name. He always got names confused.

“Yeah?”

“Why did ‘cha say that there ain’t no B?”

He starred at her for a moment. That was a pretty stupid question in his opinion.

“Because there isn’t.”