Smokin Big Doinks

[mcelquotes]

And as always, if you see someone stealing food, no you didn't.

Sydnee McElroy

[alatarielqueen]

[the-song-not-sung-in-vain]

Fantasy is when Hugo Weaving is a good guy and sci-fi is when Hugo Weaving is a bad guy.

[beardedmrbean]

Fantasy is when Sean Bean dies and Sci-Fi is also when Sean Bean dies

[lilyblisslys]

insane comparison, thank you Guillermo

[what-even-is-thiss]

“Cats don’t actually love you”

A cat is a small creature in the middle of the food chain that is fully aware that you are a very large thing that could stomp its head in at any moment and yet it chooses to rest its tiny little head on your leg for a nap and spreads out on the floor near you exposing its belly and its most sensitive organs. It brings dead mice and bugs to you to share food.

Don’t you get it? This tiny thing trusts you. It wants to help you too. It licks your leg thinking that it’s helping. It kneads on you to find comfort. It shares its body warmth with you in the cold and gives you your space in the heat. It hisses at other mammals it sees outside including other cats in an effort to protect its family.

Cats love you so so much. But they will keep trying to eat plastic.

[what-even-is-thiss]

“Well you wouldn’t be discriminated against if you just hid everything about who you are from everyone”

Hey. Hey. Listen. Come close. Closer. Yeah. Listen.

*blows an air horn in your ear*

[alittlecrumbplz]

Seriously, I want to be a fly on the wall for that conversation.

[omgsen]

I love talking nonsense with you and I hope that we can talk nonsense with each other for the rest of our lives.

[taraxippos]

(david attenborough voice) This big orange cunt... is a Tiger

[sacred-portal]

[infectiouspiss]

the most powerful wizard in the aquarium summons his dinner

[hummingbirdsaltimolockia]

do it scared do it stupid do it alone etc etc but don’t do it hungry. eat a snack first

[tlirsgender]

I think Spock could hang out with Squidward because they're the same type of cultured faggot but Squidward would get petty and mean about something and Spock would be like honestly mr tentacles I find this type of outburst very distasteful. & he would fix him

[vitalinformations]

do they live in capitalist bikini bottom or socialist space future because the answer really affects whether spock fixes squiddy or systemic injustices change who spock is as a person.

[tlirsgender]

I was imagining the enterprise comes to bikini bottom planet of the week style but I'm obsessed with the idea of spock working at the krusty krab & how that would affect him psychologically

[capacity2]

The cure to anxiety is completing all the tasks you have to finish for the day early and doing them phenomenally and being physically perfect and on everyone’s good side preferably even their favorite.

[rrat-king]

i need "dragon, i am gay as hell" merch IMMIDIATELY

[drawnsnake]

The Jojamart Junimo

[shwarmadillo]

the catwich saga

[elthbe]

Tolkien writing kingdoms' moral decay and eventual decline: they exploited nature, destroyed forests and cut down trees

Tolkien writing male characters' moral decay and eventual decline: he stopped listening to his wife

[chrishayley]

AGENT CARTER 2.06 “Life of the Party”