A weeb?! AND a doctor?! don't tell me you like feet too, queen @doctorweebmd - Tumblr Blog

roadtripwithlucifer is my AO3

i don’t have a twitter or insta or kofi or anything lol i just talk to myself on here and forget to respond to comments/messages for months on end (sorry)

#but seriously though sorry #roadtripwithlucifer #just trying to clarify why/where i'm following people from lol

kyouka-supremacy

Every day I thank Beast for making what was an already complex and multilayered relationship an even more complex and multilayered relationship

The layers it adds to the sskk dynamics... How much they have in common... Helping to distinguish what of their behavior was shaped by their upbringing and what wasn't and instead is part of their nature... And most importantly how they would have literally loved each other if it hadn't been for the circumstances. They would have clicked at the first encounter. They would have affably chatted like they were longtime friends. They would have sympathized with the other and genuinely enjoyed the other's presence. AND ALL OF THIS IS CANON

Tbh I think Beast's main theme is that Atsushi and Akutagawa love each other and that any grudge they hold against the other is the consequence of the society they live in no I don't take criticism. What hits hardest - really, hardest - is the fact that even while fighting in Beast, they knew the other had no fault. They knew the other was just doing what they had to do, and it couldn't be any other way. They would have done the same thing in their place, and in a way they were doing exactly that, because their positions - fighting for their little sisters' lives - were nearly identical. As paradoxical as it may sound, even while fighting, they were sympathizing one with the other. The most beautiful yet cruel difference between Beast and canon is that while in canon they fight against each other because there's a difference in their ideals / goals, and can't understand the other's motivations, in Beast they do have such knowledge, they do understand and even go as far as to relate to the other's motivations, yet because of cruel fate they can't evade fighting - despite they would rather not to!!!! Despite actually saying they're sorry for what they're doing!!!! - because the circumstances compelled them to kill each other, a destiny they can't escape. And it's so tragic, and it's so beautiful, and it shows how deeply connected they are, and how much they're made for each other.

#sobs #if bsd beast didnt exist i dont think i'd care this much about sskk and i'm not kidding #it really adds such a beautiful complex layer to both atsushi's and akutagawa's characters #and their relationship together #like YES a story entirely focused on my protag and his foil. how it should be

(me re-reading chapter 14 of eih)

#oh my god??????#first part evil. absolutely fucking EVILLL #second part i'm blushing so hard that i literally have to stop reading every few seconds what is WRONG with you girl #dont @ me i know i wrote it like HOW. this is insanity.#i dont know. it felt different when writing it and it feels different when reading it #i dont know how else to describe it.

should the epilogue of 'everything in halves' be posted as one chapter or two?

one long chapter

two shorter chapters

Voting ended on3h

For context:

this would not change the posting schedule, I'd still post the entire epilogue the same day

the epilogue is going to be like. 10k words or more i think. so the 'shorter' chapters are going to be not that short

the epilogue consists of two parts; back in original world and back in the BEAST world

propaganda for one chapter: symbolizes them being split in half then coming back together - 8 chapters for part 1, 8 chapters for part 2, 1 chapter (them merging together) for part 3. meant to be read together so doesn't have an arbitrary split line between chapters. it feels like a more definitive 'end' chapter if they're together and feels like a better end to the story overall in this manner.

propaganda for two chapters: if we're going for symmetry then this works better - 9 chapters for original universe, 9 chapters for BEAST universe. some people may get confused that its two different universes in the same chapter so its clearer if they're separated. more digestible length for people who dont like reading 10k in one setting (although if you dont what are you doing reading my fics.... thats just how long my chapters get jfc)

#i am not including a third option which is 'girl who the fuck caressss' because it is the correct option #originally it was gonna be 2 chapters but the more i think about it being 1 the more i like it. metaphorically speaking.#this is an insight into how much i overthink every single decision about all my stupid ass yaoi fics. yes i'm okay.

doctorweebmd

(cracks knuckles) alright. lets make herstory

starting wordcount eih epilogue: 7200

doctorweebmd

'ending' wordcount: 8300. very surprising i somehow added another 1k words as I spent the last few hours re-reading the fic and putting in thoughts/short dialogues/reminders about plot points that I had forgotten to address rather than actually 'writing,' per se. its going to need a lot of whittling because its definitely impossible to address EVERYTHING but you know me i'm incapable of shutting up. alas.

#ok this is going to drive me crazy. its clearly going to be 10k+. do i keep it as one chapter or split it.#i'm gonna crowdsource the answer whateverrrr

thaidoodles

"You did good, tiger."

set in the BEAST universe - in which Atsushi sometimes has a hard time turning back when he's been fighting in tiger form for too long.

read right to left

#AHHHHHHHHHHHH #AHHHHHHHHHH #AHAHSJDHlkdjfaljsdflkjasdkfjasdkl;fj #AHGWKWIWijufioaweufkadsjf #AWOOOOOOO #djfalkdsjfaskldfj ikm crazy! i;m crazy i'm crazy #ARE YOU. ARE YOU SO SERIOUS RIGHT NOw #howling like a sick dog. scratching at my cage. biting biting biting #ohhhhhh op. cmon now. CMONNNN #everyone else go home this was drawn for me and me along (<- joking obviously)#absolutely adore this.#haha.#ha.#wow.#sskk #beast sskk

hi-raethia

BECAUSE NONE OF YOU READ ONGOING LONGFICS IF THEYRE NOT ALREADY COMPLETED !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#< prev real and true #also: the path to paradise you say? 🤔#writing long-fics is SUCH a slog it takes SO long like if i didnt feel an obligation to the people reading i'd probably ditch half of 'em #its easy to say 'write for yourself' when you aren't writing 400 page epics lmao #like it takes over a year (for me) to write these 100k + fics. my internal motivation is going to wax and wane in that period #so i push myself forward with external motivation from commenters and readers. until the muse comes back.#i have written a LOT over the past 6+ years and even i'm not immune to hearing crickets the first few chapters of a long fic #so being a new/younger author and putting in all that work to hear nothing back must be so disheartening #support those authors!!! be brave!!! read fics that are unfinished!!!#i promise it won't kill you!!!!!!!!

(cracks knuckles) alright. lets make herstory

starting wordcount eih epilogue: 7200

#i work a night-shift today so lets see what bullshit can be cooked up in the next few hours #(nods to self) when done this will put eih in the top 10 longest sskk fics on ao3 (s****kk being excluded)#heh. my goal of expanding sskk's longfic repetuare is well within reach. over the past three years i've written (checks notes) 2 fanfics #listen it takes a long fucking time ok. god help me.

frontrowraisins

It's pride month but to me these two are homo 365 days a year

#cutiessss #i love atsushi looking at the audience like hehe. me and the bad bitch i pulled with my sadboy swag #i love they #sskk

dead-body-in-the-basement

A very rare sighting of this DOA trio

#lmaooo honestly based based based #if i was fyodor every time someone threatened to kill me i'd look into the camera like i'm on the office #oh? you'll kill me? heh.#anyway hilarious fantastic 10/10 op #doa bsd

scarletuzuha

Don’t stare at me with that look, tiger. 😤😤

#sobs #beloved #i just love the difference between beast and regular atsushi's eyes. its subtle but so lovely #nakajima atsushi

chuuyaskennedy

"You damn fool

Hurry up and go"

#screams are you kidding!!!!!#cinema I tell you!!! cinema!!!!#wow op #sskk

doctorweebmd

(deep breath) ok. i'm gonna try to write a bit of the epilogue. starting word count 4850.

doctorweebmd

7200 now. oops. turns out theres a lot i wanna write for the epilogue. also dear god this chapter BETTER be under 10k or so help me....

#maybe if its over 10k i'll split it into two chapters............#or maybe i wont!!!!!#its still super rough and needs a LOT of polish #but i think this weekend is actually a pretty realistic goal.

ihave4obsessions

>Realized I’ve never drawn a tiger before

>been rereading the bsd manga too

…anyway here’s literally the best piece of art i’ve ever done because I’m a sucker for Byakko <3

#whoa this is beautiful!!!#I can’t believe you’ve never drawn a tiger op !!!#byakko looks so vicious and Atsushi looks so calm I adore that

kyouka-supremacy

doctorweebmd

#something something looking away from one another.#something something no matter what you'll still have to face one another #your paths cross and intersect. you cant turn away forever #SCREAMS #i love you sskk i feel very normal about beast!sskk and og!sskk #this has nothing to do with eih. dont worry about it.

(deep breath) ok. i'm gonna try to write a bit of the epilogue. starting word count 4850.

#i've been playing through that kingdom hearts bundle that was on sale for like 20 bucks on steam #and right now i'm on chain of memories and its easy to sink a lot of time into it #especially now that i understand the card gaming system #i'm so off my game since returning from vacation #i think finishing this will help me literally and metaphorically turn the next chapter.....#ok let me try. yip yip!

I played persona 4 for the first time like 2 years ago and, playing it for the first time, was so touched and amazed at Kenji’s storyline. Like… wow…, a sincere study of internalized homophobia and compensatory hypermasculinity….

and THEN they gave him naoto as a love interest and I was like wow… a game from 2008…. How progressive…. truly embracing the message of accepting who you are and finding love and acceptance as a gay teenager in a small town… of not being ashamed and living your truth….

and THEN naotos story… about dressing, presenting himself, thinking of himself as a man despite being born as a woman… of being treated like he was incapable of being clever or accomplished because he was a woman… whoa… a sincere look into a trans character now accepted and loved for who they are, not too afraid to make friends or laugh or be himself because people might discover the truth…

anyway persona 4 accomplished the incredibly rare feat of being SO homophobic and transphobic that it ALMOST circled back around to being woke. But don’t worry it reminded you enough times that it was all very funny actually. if you don’t remember it by the 5th time yosuke jokes about Kenji sexually assaulting him then maybe it will become clear when Kenji finds out that Naoto is a girl and falls down to his knees in joy because dear GOD what could be worse than being gay!!!

Dont worry everyone we came SO close to sincerely exploring sexuality and gender and then made it all into a joke! No one was gay or trans they were just a little confused! This is a good message. 🥰🥰🥰

but now it’s 2026 Atlus. What’s your move.

#haters will say: but it IS accepting yourself! kenji thought he was gay because he liked girly things!#but he learned liking girly things doesn’t make him gay! 🥰 making him like the male-presenting character who turns out to be a woman #is definitely not part of the gag!#haters will also say: naoto didn’t accept herself as a woman! she learned she doesn’t have to be a man to be accomplished! this is good!#which is why immediately after we learn about naotos identity everyone switches to female pronouns #and switch her to wearing clothes that highlight her huge tits!!! this is about acceptance!!! acceptance of big naturals!!!!#um. spoilers I guess. the game came out 18 years ago what can I say #like it’s truly baffling. more baffling that I sincerely thought a game was gonna be that progressive #from atlus?! in 2008?! I’m the idiot here #alas it was so close. to meaning something. wow.#anyway am I still gonna buy and play revival? yes.#do I think they’re going to adapt anything to make it less insulting? unlikely #hmmm… been thinking about this since seeing that last #about ‘it would be good if it was good’ vs ‘almost perfect and yet completely fumbled in a way that kills me’#there are so few things that I’d put in the second half…#persona 5 royal is nearly perfect. with just a FEW writing decisions that make me want to hit my head against a wall #the music the gameplay the characters the story the relationships!!!!!!!#and yet. and yet.

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A weeb?! AND a doctor?! don't tell me you like feet too, queen