hello!! i know i haven’t been uploading any works for a veryyyy long time :c and i apologize for that! i started a new account which was originally supposed to be only for riize so i’ve been neglecting this account. because of this, i’ve decided that i will just make my new account my main where i’ll be writing from now on regardless of the group :) i will be reuploading my works to that account so it’ll still be up!! thank you for supporting me ^^
you need to be loved patiently. you need to feel the love slowly creeping in, a warning, a way to back away if you’re too scared. you need to be loved cautiously, as if you’re fragile. you need to be loved gently, because love is messy and muddy and makes your socks wet and hurts if the sun gets too close. but you need to let yourself be loved, because when you do, it’ll feel like spring.
regretful to say this is quite accurate cz like. it's impossible to find someone who is patient enough to love me like this :>
anyways thanku for the tagggg @eoieopda !! im tagging @weird-bookworm @slytherinshua @arafilez @blue-jisungs @wheeboo @rubywonu @jjunhui @planetkiimchi @gyuswhore @chwedout @haecien and any moots ive missed ++ anyone else who wants to do this <3
you need to be loved gently, taken care of. you need to let yourself be taken care of. you deserve the kindness. you deserve to have fingertips pressed to yours, you deserve soft smiles and quiet laughs. you need to be kissed in the middle of the night, you need to be told it's okay. you're used to aggressive love, you need it gently.
well who’s surprised this is accurate cause not me 😓😓 also this is so yuto so we are not surprised why I ult bias him either lol but this was so fun yenaaa
𓂃 ⋆ thanks for the tag @slytherinshua & @hursheys cc: is anyone surprised i picked jungsu AGAIN (i cannot help myself that’s my bf)
like you can love again
you need to be loved in a way that shows you love is sacred, it is divine. you need to be loved so purely, so lightly, so you can learn to love. you need to be loved in the way oceans rise, but also fall. you need to be loved in the way wind rushes through leaves. you need to be loved gently, and patiently, and understanding. you need to be loved in a way that even if you cannot love, you will still be loved.
optional tags : @hoonven @whyilovewhales-pdf @gluion @dongminz @arafilez @jakeflvrz @jeongin-lvr @mxlly143 @hollyoongs @jenaissite @icyminghao @wuaxoi (ignore if you’ve been tagged already i can’t remember)
you need to be loved in happiness and foolishness. a puppy love, a love so purely good, so full of happiness it makes your stomach ache. you need to be loved in a way that reminds you of the childhood you didn’t get to have. you need to be loved as if you’re feeling the rain fall upon your cheeks for the first time. refreshing, and clean.
@pink-lemonadefairy let's pretend i don't tag you for every game... <3
you need to be loved in a way that shows you love is sacred, it is divine. you need to be loved so purely, so lightly, so you can learn to love. you need to be loved in the way oceans rise, but also fall. you need to be loved in the way wind rushes through leaves. you need to be loved gently, and patiently, and understanding. you need to be loved in a way that even if you cannot love, you will still be loved.
teehee <3 thank you crabnonnie 💛 npt — @dollvrse @dongminz @0310s + anyone who’d like to do this! <3
thank u for the tag @loserlvrss & @pink-lemonadefairy! ૮ ˶´ ᵕˋ ˶ა
like lovers watching the sunset
you need to be loved in the way teenagers kiss in the rain and giggle behind hands. you need to be loved like a child, taken care of, watched over, focused on. you need to feel the warmth of the sun, you need to feel the love rushing through your veins. you need to be reminded that love is worth it, and it’s beautiful to experience. you need to be loved in a way that is refreshing, again and again.
npt: @serejae, @astrae4, and anybody who wants to participate!
𓂃 ⋆ thanks for the tag @arafilez (ignore that i accidentally reblogged this twice lmfao) i had to do current favs bc i’m the most indecisive person everrrr ꜀( ˊ̠˂˃ˋ̠ )꜆ jungsu & yoongi own my <3 tho
YOU’VE BEEN FRIENDS WITH ANTON LEE SINCE YOU CAN EVEN REMEMBER. You met each other as kids, forced to hang out with each other at a house party his parent’s had invited your family to. Given that you two were around the same age in comparison to the other kids who were still oblivious babies or whiny toddlers, it was only natural for you and Anton to gravitate towards each other: wherever he went you would follow, your fondest memories with him being when you both constantly abused your ‘big sister’ and ‘big brother’ privileges to boss the other kids around.
But in comparison to you who always got a little too mean towards the little kids, Anton was much more lenient; it was why they often favored him over you, which you didn’t really mind. That meant they’d bother you less during parties. But it was still you who hung out with Anton the most and it was you who stuck to his side even if the younger kids didn’t really want you around. Then middle school came, and you two gradually drifted apart until you had your own set of friend groups in high school—you were off with Minji and Sunoo and Taesan and Jaehyun and Danielle, and he was constantly surrounded by other guys you didn’t really care about (all except for a certain someone, of course, but that’s later on into the future). The house parties happened less and less, the little kids grew up and eventually left the two of you alone, and it was only until he found out about your little crush on Seunghan did you and Anton finally start bringing back the friendship that was slowly becoming forgotten.
Anton is… a good kid, which is why everyone is always drawn to him. He’s always had a heart as big as his head, so perhaps the reason why you’re this nervous about meeting with him after what seemed like days since your fight is because you don’t want to lose him again. Drifting apart is natural, friends fight—you know all that, but at the very least you did not want to end it on bad terms. You don’t want your last memories of your childhood best friend being bitter, which is why you must absolutely not mess this one chance up.
“…Did you ever, like, have a crush on him?” Seunghan inquires slowly, tapping his pen against his chin languidly as he sits on the floor beside your bed.
You give him a small, questioning glare. “Why do you ask?” you start, suspicious. “Because you think girls and boys simply can’t be friends?”
Seunghan shrugs. “Yeah?”
“Wait, really? You really think that?” your shoulders slumped.
“I mean,” Seunghan says, leaning back on your bed. “Anton’s pretty handsome, surely you’ve had a crush on him when you were younger, right?”
You consider it. “Hmm… well, I guess I did.”
“Really?” Seunghan seems more shocked rather than appalled. You hoped that was a good thing.
“In seventh grade, I think,” you clarify, “that was when he started getting…cute, I guess, and he was also getting more involved in swimming. Everyone started finding him attractive too, so it wasn’t just me. It was like being attracted to him was the new trend, or something.”
“What happened after that?”
“Well, he got a girlfriend around that time, so I quickly lost all the interest I had in him. I think I was super in-denial about it, too, so it’s not like anything would have happened between us because I didn’t want it happening at all,” you blandly respond. “Anyway, whenever I think about dating Anton, I just keep remembering about how he’d always cling and cry to his mom for hours when something didn't go his way back when we were little. So, major turn-off.”
Seunghan laughs loudly, and you watch him fondly as he tries to regain his senses. “Seriously?” he asks, tilting his head to the side.
“Seriously.”
Seunghan looks at you thoughtfully. “So you lost interest in him because he got a girlfriend, but why wasn’t it the same when it came to me?”
You pause, blinking slowly at him as shock invades your expression. Seunghan merely stares right back at you, an easygoing smile on his face while he waits for your response.
“I…” your words lose you, and you desperately try to grab at them. But Seunghan is patient, he waits for you to gather them, leaning his cheek against the cap of his knee while he sits beside you on the floor of your room. “I don’t… know?”
His smile widens. “You don’t know?”
You feel your face flush. “Well, I mean,” you start off bashfully, looking away from his prying gaze. “This and that are different… I knew Anton way before I started crushing on him, but I barely knew you. Plus, I realized I just saw him as a brother, but you… we weren’t even friends in the first place…”
Your face is probably as hot as a whistling kettle after you finished talking, and Seunghan’s amused smile isn’t helping your situation in the slightest.
“Don’t start teasing me,” you grumble, and Seunghan just laughs again, moving closer to pinch your cheek.
“But you’re so cute,” Seunghan coos, inching closer while you attempt to push his invasive hands away from your face. “You’re my cute girl, the cutest ever, I just wanna—”
A loud knock interrupts him, and you jump at the sound.
“Anton,” you gasp, staring back at Seunghan with wide eyes.
His silence enables you to aggressively push him away from you, and he gently stumbles back into the opposite way as you scramble to get onto your feet. He gives you an offended look, and you look back at him with an apologetic expression only to be met with a playful roll of his eyes. You hype yourself up as you make your way to the door, before opening it without further ado.
Anton blinks down at you. “Oh, hey,” he casually says.
“Hey!” you respond, suspiciously a little out of breath.
Anton glances at Seunghan who’s keeping himself busy with his laptop by the back, looks at your flushed face, before making a disgusted expression. “Ew, don’t tell me you two were making out just now…”
Seunghan freezes, the tips of his ears turning red while your jaw almost hits the floor.
You instinctively hit Anton’s arm. “No, we weren’t, idiot!”
He yelps, nursing his arm. “Ow! You didn’t have to hit me, jeez… I came here in peace, and this is how you treat me?”
You cringe. “Sorry…”
Anton quickly digresses. He meets your hesitant gaze, quietly asking, “Can we talk outside?”
“Oh, uh, sure,” you blinked. There it was—the Anton you knew when you were kids, always so shy despite being in the company of his friends. But the situation is a little more than just that, so you understand where he was coming from. “In the hallway?”
“Yeah, it won’t be quick,” Anton confirms as you step out of the room, taking one last longing look at Seunghan, who merely sends you back a reassuring smile as if he was saying ‘goodluck!’ to the both of you. (You refrained from eating your fist at how cute he looked.)
Out in the hall, the air turns into suffocating awkwardness you never thought you’d have with Anton Lee. You don’t remember being this… tense around his presence, as if you’re walking around eggshells around him no matter how nonchalant the two of you tried to act. You try to recall the last time you felt this awkward around him, but you can only come up with the brief moment in middle school when you harbored a crush on him that hadn’t even lasted a week. You had felt awkward around him because viewing Anton in a romantic light never really seemed that appealing, but that feeling had immediately washed away when you realized all you ever wanted out of him was his friendship and nothing else.
Of course, you can’t say the same about Anton. It’s not as if you can read his mind despite knowing him for so long now, but now you wonder if he’s experienced the same feelings you once did. And, in some part of you, you wonder if he harbors any romantic feelings for you right now—even if the rest of your friends tried to hide it, you weren’t oblivious to Jaehyun’s knowing glances whenever you and Anton were in the same room.
You just didn’t want to acknowledge such things ever again, not when your friendship with him has been sailing pretty well these past few years already.
Well, until now, that is.
“So…” you trail off, looking at his shoulder instead of his face.
“I’m sorry,” Anton immediately says, voice quieter than ever.
Oh.
“I shouldn’t have acted so weird after promising I’d set you up with Seunghan,” he continues, scratching his nape. “I never meant to insinuate that your feelings for him were shallow. I know how much you like him, but I ended up projecting my doubts into you and ruining our friendship in the process anyway. I honestly really, really wanted you guys to get together because I know that’s what makes you happy, and it’s also what makes Seunghan happy, so—”
“I forgive you, Anton,” you interrupt, before looking down at the floor. “And I’m also sorry; I shouldn’t have cornered you like that in the groupchat. I just… I just hated the thought of you disapproving of my relationship with him, even though you were only worried about us. And I don’t blame you for being suspicious of me, too, because I was honestly starting to falter during the first stages of becoming close with Seunghan, but I ended up really liking him anyway. And I’m glad you helped us get closer, really; I just wish we went about our concerns differently and honestly.”
“Yeah,” Anton agrees, smiling lightly, “but it’s okay now. You got your man, and I did my job. We’re all good. Right?”
“Yeah,” you repeat. “Life is good.”
“Eh, well, not… really? I have a composition assignment due in forty-eight hours and I haven’t gotten a single note in,” Anton says dryly. “I need to lock in right now.”
You push him, and he looks back at you in offense. You smiled, saying, “Lock in with us, then. We were just doing homework, for your information.”
Anton grumbles. “Yeah, right… I’d still third-wheel anyway.”
“Don’t be a big baby, ‘ton,” you roll your eyes. “We’re not gonna kiss in front of you.”
“Please don’t put that image in my mind. I’ll vomit right in this hall.”
“And I’ll make you clean it up, then I’m gonna tell your mommy how good of a job you did.”
“Kay why ess.”
You pause, looking at him thoughtfully. Anton slowly looks back at you, and you send him a small smile.
“...Thanks for looking out for us,” you say, quietly, “you’re a—...you’re a good best friend.”
“Naturally,” Anton snorts, and you give him a blank look. He quickly feigns a cough, saying, “You’re my best friend, too. Of course I’ll look out for you.”
It feels like a weight has been lifted off of your shoulders.
“...Can you believe that I had a crush on you during seventh grade?” you joke, intending to lighten the mood.
“Yeah?” Anton raises a brow at you, surprisingly unfazed.
You blink.
“Wait, seriously?”
“Yeah, I knew you liked me at that time,” Anton casually replies. “But then you started liking Intak from choir. By the way, he also knew you liked him—he told me at our last concert.”
“What?! How?!”
“...You’re not that slick, you do know that, right? The only reason Seunghan never knew was because you barely talked to him.” Anton explained dryly, sending you a disapproving look. “You were too—admirer-like. It gets sad to look at sometimes. Those four years could’ve been shortened to, like—I don’t know, three months? If you just freakin’ talked to him or something.”
Your eyes narrow. Anton raises his arms up in defense.
“But all’s well that ends well, right?” he quickly says, voice laced with a tinge of panic. “Let’s not drag this scene out now…”
You sigh in response, but oblige nonetheless. “You’re right. All’s well that ends well.”
You smile at Anton again, feeling content. You hope he shares the sentiment.
Just in time, Seunghan pops his head out from your door, looking both ways before finding the two of you crowding to the right. The creaking sound the door made as it opened forces yours and Anton’s attention towards the interruption, only to find a sheepish Seunghan stare right back at you.
“You guys have been out here for a while—just checking,” he says, ruffling his already messy black hair. “My bad.”
Although he tries to play it off with an air of nonchalance, you think you sense a hint of worry in his tone regardless. The thought makes you both uneasy and excited at the same time, which shouldn't even make sense but it just does.
Because Seunghan’s your boyfriend. And sometimes boyfriends get jealous when their girlfriend’s are alone with another guy. God, you shouldn’t be liking that sentence as much as you actually do.
“It’s all good, man,” Anton assures, waving a hand placatingly. Awkward again, but that’s none of your concern anymore—that’s just how Anton is anyway. He bites the inside of his cheek, flickering his gaze between the two of you. “Um, so… I think I’ll go now. See you guys later.”
“What?” Seunghan exclaims, a little too dejected. “So soon? You should stay and study with us. I know you still have that composition assignment to work on, and if you go back to your dorm now I know Sungchan’s just going to distract you.”
Anton winces. “Erm… I think I’d rather have that than third whe—”
You interrupt him. “He’s right! We’re better company than Sungchan anyway. Stay. Let’s get some food or something. And pull an all-nighter or whatever.”
Seunghan nods excitedly. Anton looks at the both of you incredulously.
“What the heck? You guys haven’t even been dating for a month, yet you’re already so in-sync of being annoying,” he says. “You’re quite literally making me pick between two evils right now.”
“So you’re staying?” Seunghan asks, grinning widely. You share the same, hopeful expression. “The lesser evil is definitely us, right?”
“...I’m not so sure about that.”
“Pleaaaaase, Anton, we promise we’ll be good, supportive study-buddies!” Seunghan needlessly insists. And you should be a little irked that your boyfriend’s begging another man to hang out with you two, but you surprisingly aren’t. One more company didn’t hurt, after all.
So Anton can’t even believe what he’s about to say next:
“Fine, but Y/N’s paying for food!”
You and Seunghan immediately cheer.
“Wait, what?” you ask dumbly.
But you eventually relent as the other two start making their way down the hall, an echo of a nonsensical conversation picking up. At least it didn’t take that much of a resistance from Anton to agree to yours and Seunghan’s invitation, and sure, it would’ve been nicer to just hang out with your boyfriend, but you also didn’t mind having your best friend tagging along as well. He was, after all, most of the reason why the two of you got together in the first place, so you more or less owed it to him. Plus, a hang out will slowly dissolve that suffocating awkwardness that has been circling between the two of you these past few weeks despite having already made up just minutes ago anyway, so really—all’s well that ends well.
When you finally catch up to them, Seunghan is the first one to speak up.
“So, Anton, was there ever a time you liked Y/N?”
The two of you practically choke on air.
“Excuse me,” you say.
Anton’s response is quieter. “You heard us…?”
Seunghan laughs. “Sorry, I got curious…” he says although he doesn’t sound all that remorseful. “Did you, though?”
“How can you just ask that?” Anton squeaks out.
“No, wait, I’m curious too!” you exclaim. “I can’t just be the one who had feelings for you at some point—you know how embarrassing that is?!”
Seunghan nods along. “Yeah! So embarrassing!”
“You guys are crazy, you’re literally her boyfriend!” Anton cries out, before slowly turning away. “...And yes, I did like her back at some point.”
You almost trip on nothing. “What?”
Anton awkwardly avoids your gaze.
Seunghan hollers, and you send him a pointed look. He quiets down.
You look concerningly horrified when you ask Anton. “Wait… you’re for real? When? Why? How?”
“In seventh grade,” he replies meekly. “It just happened, I guess.”
You and Seunghan almost go into shock.
“Holy shit,” he whispers, staring at Anton with wide eyes. “You guys could’ve been—oh, my God. Wow.”
“Wait, so if you knew I liked you, then why didn’t you…?” you trail off, confused.
Anton rolls his eyes indignantly. “By the time I did have feelings for you, you were already over it. What was I supposed to do?”
“I don’t know—fight for her?” Seunghan suggests. “Such a wasted opportunity…”
“Dude,” Anton says dryly. “If I did that, you guys wouldn’t be dating right now!”
“Oh, right.”
You snort. “I guess it just means we aren’t meant for each other, huh?” you joke.
Seunghan almost looks sad. “Well, when you put it like that… I guess it really was a ‘right person, wrong time’ kind of situation, huh?”
“Yeah,” Anton says. “I like this outcome better, though. I like you guys together.”
You look at him pitifully. “Anton, you don’t have to be sad…”
“I’m not sad.”
“We’ll find you a partner soon… for all the help you’ve given us… I mean, they probably won’t be as cool and awesome as me, but at least you won’t be lonely anymore…”
“No thanks. Can we just go get food now?”
“No, really, Seunghan and I are always here for you. You helped us, so now it’s our turn to help you—what do you think of Wonyoung? She’s pre-med.”
“Oh! I know someone who’s friends with her, what do you think? I think you guys would be a good match.”
“Go to hell, the two of you.”
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SUMMARY. pining after hong seunghan has always felt like an unachievable reality; however, just a few months into your first year of college, it seems that the gods have finally listened to your prayers when news breaks out that your long-time crush is single once again.
AUTHOR'S NOTE. hi guys sorry for the longassshhh wait omg. i cant believe it took me this long to finish the reconciliation chapter but ykw... we're here now and that's all that matters. i will never leave u guys hanging ✊anyways this baby is ending in 1 chapter tehee see u next time.
warnings — hanging joke, saying marriage but not actually married yet(?)
genre — FLUFF & romance hehe (wc. 789)
note — mentally not the best so im rlly inconsistent but it’s okay for now guys 😎👍 if u have any requests i’d be very happy to make it for u 😘😘 plspls like repost n follow 🙌
more works — navigation | bnd!masterlist
DING! DING! DING!
The buzzing notification sounds echoed loudly in a busy cafe, making some customers look at the victim responsible for these noises.
Said victim hurries to turn their notification sounds off, before checking his messages—only to see 6 missed calls and 14 messages from ‘manager 😫🔥’.
manager 😫🔥: WHERE ARE YOU???
manager 😫🔥: WE’RE THREE HOURS LATE ALREADY!!!!
you: im On the Way!
you: gimme a bit
manager 😫🔥: dont lie. I literally see your location and it isn’t moving AT ALL.
you: okay im actually almost done.
you: seriously, the line’s almost over
you: [picture attached]
manager 😫🔥: fine. Come back faster! We need to hurry up to isac bc u guys already missed the track comp.
you: 👍👍
“Order 1140, Mr. Woonhak!” Called a server.
Nobody reacted to that call for a few seconds, before the 180-ish-cm man jolted, remembering that he was supposedly Woonhak.
(Ever put a name in your order and forgot about it? Yeah, it happens to me all the time.)
“Here!” He replied, coming to the counter in a hurry.
“Matcha cake with pink frosting and custom lettering?” They asked to be sure.
“Yes, thank you so much!” Replied “Mr. Woonhak” as he takes the takeaway-boxed cake and hurried out the door.
He practically jumped in the car (gracefully though) with how fast he was going.
“Yah!” shouted Woonhak, “why’d you take so long!?”
“Don’t you see the line?” Replied Taesan, his eye rolling as he holds the cake with care.
“Yeah but why do we have to go get this cake? Just get it at any other bakery so we wouldn’t be late to ISAC—we already missed the track race!”
Someone (Leehan) suddenly sat up from the backseat, glasses crooked on his head as if he just woke up (he did), “That’s because it’s y/n’s favorite cake.”
“Yeah Woonhak,” butted another menace (jaehyun), “It’s their 2nd anniversary— but of course youuuu wouldn’t understand since you’ve never had a woman’s touch before other than your mom and sister.”
“YAH!” screamed Woonhak.
Thus, another bonekdo quarrel emerge.
(Woonhak lost once again. Give me a dab in the comments; one dab = one hp for our maknae’s patience)
EXCLUSIVE: BOYNEXTDOOR’S TAESAN MISTAKES ISAC FOR WE GOT MARRIED?
In the ISAC 2024, k-pop boy band BOYNEXTDOOR (under KOZ) arrives 5 hours late to the venue, earning some attention from netizens. Onedoors (Boynextdoor’s fans) called them hilarious, especially with that spectacular entrance, consisting of the members wearing sunglasses and strutting in the building as if they won the games (they will then lose really badly in archery) in a proud manner.
Despite the many games and groups competing in the games, what went most viral was surprisingly not sports-related, and we’re here to tell you the scoop!
Boynextdoor’s Taesan is widely known for dating [reader] of [group name] since the very beginning of their debuts. They also went trending many times for that—like a fresh breeze in the very tense atmosphere of idol-relationships. This time, it seems that Taesan decided to take it up a notch with his display of public affection and prove to everyone that romance is very much not dead!
Running in the building—and then sliding on his knees to stop in front of [reader]’s view—before procuring a bouquet of pink lilies for her all the while his very supportive members threw confetti at them!? Gosh, me when! After that, he also gave [reader] an exclusive cake from [reader’s favorite cake shop] to celebrate what seemed to be their 2nd year Anniversary.
Other idols in the building such as ZEROBASEONE and THE BOYZ’s Younghoon gave their support by cheering on the couple—as well as many others. Later on, it was even said by Zerobaseone’s Gunwook jokingly in his group’s vlog that he was jealous of their relationship, haha!
When asked about it later on in a live, Taesan responded that it was simply because it was their anniversary, and he wanted to make it special for them. In addition, he said a catchphrase that went viral— saying “Happy wife, happy life”, despite them not being married yet. [reader’s group] have not yet responded to this statement.
Many netizens are reacting to this viral video, saying that it’s so fresh and sweet of them two—some even joking and saying that “I’m the guy h*nging in the lights behind them” (source) in Tiktok and Instagram. All in all, netizens seem to think that it’s extremely sweet and wishes them both to remain happy and strong in the relationship!
What do you think about it?
Comments (19.99) | open
More related searches… BOYNEXTDOOR comeback September 25 | Sungho’s so hot in the new concept photo: twenty ver.
✶ SYPONOSIS ! : "welcome back, i missed you." those were the first words you got after moving back to your hometown from seoul, and it got on your nerves that it came from the boy you hated the most. song eunseok.
– ೀ 7 minutes before the incident
You had just arrived back to your hometown, the cold air had flushed your face. It was nice being back, the familiarity gave you comfort. It’s as if you were 16 again, you were happy.
As you were on the way to the corner shop that you had always gone to after school, you passed by the playground where you’d frequently eat at. You remembered all the silly memories you had made with your friends there.
– ೀ 5 years ago
Sohee you little snitch, come back here!! Ningning had yelled while chasing after the young boy.
It’s not my fault you skipped class!! The 15 year old boy provoked while running away.
Ugh i’m gonna kill you! Ningning shouted.
They’re like cartoon characters, it’s always so entertaining watching them. Jiheon commented, giving a small giggle after.
I know right. You replied after laughing for a bit
Thump .ᐟ
You and Jiheon ran over wondering where that noise came from.
Ouchhh ugh that hurts. Sohee had cried after tripping over a rock.
HAHAHAHAHAH YOU IDIOT HOW DID YOU NOT SEE THAT. Ningning said laughing while helping him get up.
Shut up. He scowled.
– ೀ a minute before the incident
You laughed recalling the old memories as you pass by the playground.
You finally reached the corner store. You grabbed a drink, paid, and headed for the door; until you bumped into something.. no, someone. He was a tall boy, brown hair, wearing a white and blue striped shirt, and that same fucking smirk. God, of course he just had to be the person you bump into first. Song Eunseok.
Welcome back yn, i missed you. He said while grinning from ear to ear. Fuck. if you didn’t know any better you would’ve fallen for him right there and there. Yes, you hated him but you couldn’t deny that he was goodlooking. That was something that annoyed the hell out of you.
Wait. hold up, what did he say? He missed you? The song eunseok, missing you? Bullshit. This is exactly why you hated him, he always knew how to get a reaction out of you, he knew which buttons to press, he made you act like someone you usually weren’t. Ugh there it is again. Those stupid irrelevant thoughts you had about him.
Anyway, that isn’t important because right now, he’s in front of you. you needed to leave asap, and that’s exactly what you did. You ran.
– ೀ
002 you are NOT sigma
MASTERLIST : <- BACK | NEXT -> °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・
alcohol: whatever is in that glass I’ll drink it and ask for more. (but tequila enjoyer)
warm drink: sniper’s jar jk jk, coffee.
I’m not a picky eater as you can see. anyway, tagging ma bros @scrunckled-idiot @another-delta-lover @tf2addictedmann @thatonesimp-e @aniolleq @zeldot @sewerdraws
Milk: 2% is my preference! If I’m in the mood I’ll enjoy a good strawberry milk too (I just love milk)
Alcohol: legally I say none (my mum and I enjoy sharing a moscato from time to time)
Warm drink: hot chocolate’s my favorite! But tea is super nice as well (even if I usually put like 5 scoops of sugar into a cup because I need that zing)
Milk:whole milk all other precents make me feel bad for some reason
Alcohol: is bad I’m a minor
Warm drink: hot coco is so so yummy I put hot coco mix in the cup full the cup up with hot water but not all the way and put milk in till it’s cool enough to drink
Alcohol: I’m a couple years away from legally being able to drink but it smells weird and would probably give me a headache even without having a hangover if I tried it
thanks for the tag @shyday-ao3 this one looks really fun!
rules: go to your playlist and find a song for each letter of your URL, then tag some friends to do the same
this is when i curse myself for having so many similar letters in my url but here goes!
A: animals (maroon v)
G: ghost town (benson boone)
I: i ran (so far away) (hidden citizens)
R: radioactive (imagine dragons)
L: ludens (bring me the horizon)
A: achilles come down (gang of youths)
N: not afraid anymore (halsey)
D: dead man (david kushner)
H: hell of a good time (haiden henderson)
E: empire now (hozier)
R: romeo & juliet (hidden citizens)
Q: (this one's really hard, i've got nothing)
U: us. (gracie abrams)
I: in the woods somewhere (hozier)
L: like that (bea miller)
L: let's kill tonight (panic! at the disco)
𓂃 ⋆ thank u for the tag @slytherinshua c: (i forgot to finish this)
nationality : american
birth month : november
fav movie/series : the witcher, 20th century girl, alchemy of souls, shameless, money heist, alice in borderland, monster house, scooby-doo, coraline, ponyo, our beloved summer, supernatural, sweet home, criminal minds, twenty five twenty one, etc.
fav song : i don’t care if you’re contagious by pierce the veil, the apparition by sleep token, enemy by xdinary heroes, louder than bombs by bts, wildflower by billie eilish, but sometimes by boynextdoor, roar by the boyz, amor ácido by danna paola, etc.
fav movie/series : our beloved summer, lalaland, the notebook, 500 days of summer, criminal minds, undercover underage, goedam, 10 things i hate about you
fav song : backburner by niki, lovebombs by nessa barrett, the man who cant be moved by the scripts, id rather pretend by bryan barnes, ready to love by seventeen
fav movies/series : kimi ni todoke, 20th century girl, when i fly towards you, pride and prejudice, coraline, howls moving castle, + more!
fav songs : decode, and is it new years yet? by sabrina carpenter, urs, vintage, and i like u by niki, cologne by beabadoobee, roommates by malcolm todd, love again, too deep to turn back, and streetcar by daniel caesar
fandoms : onedoor, moa, carat, briize, and zerose
fav idols : taesan, beomgyu, minghao, eunseok, sungchan, and yujin
thank you for the tag! @serejae and @loserlvrss ૮ ˶´ ᵕˋ ˶ა
npt : @blumisiu, @gluion, @0310s, @lionhanie, + anybody who wants to do this!
summary : would the tides push you closer, or pull you farther away?
genre : angst, taesan x afab!reader
tws : language, angst
author notes : i thought about making this a happy ending, i really did, i promise
word count : 1.6k
“don’t say this, y/n.”
you stared at the man in front of you blankly, like you had to stay strong. was this was for the better?
he didn’t deserve to carry you through the whirling hurricane, like he promised all those months ago—when you could still say you loved him with hearts in your eyes. it was what you knew you had to do; something you may regret someday, but nonetheless the lesser of two evils. hurt him now instead of when it would really matter is what you convinced yourself a couple nights ago. he could get over you—you weren't anything special—nothing more than borrowed time and stolen moments: the stars during a sunrise, the flowers during fall, the snow in spring. nothing more than roses bound to wilt. nothing more, and nothing better.
you took in a shaky breath, feeling like your heart could (and would) fall out of your chest at any given moment. “i’m sorry.”
“what if i can’t live without you, y/n?”
he said your name so effortlessly—like he knew you—and, that made you violently nauseous. “find a way, taesan.” you spewed out with a venomous tongue, shaking hands masked by your arms being crossed. maybe it was to protect yourself, but you thought that if he could make you the enemy it would hurt him less. anger has always been stronger than sadness, and happiness.
the tears welled in his eyes as he scoffed off to the side. “how could you?” you knew you had his heart in your hands, but were you really prepared to drop it and watch it scatter like the wind? “i need you.”
“i don’t love you… i never have.”
well it didn’t matter if you were ready, because now it went way past just being hurt. now it was death by a million cuts. a wound you opened and knew could never be stitched closed. you knew it was selfish to hope he could eventually get better just because that’s what you wanted for him. you also knew he’d never forgive you, and it would be stupid to believe anything but—you knew him as well as he knew you, and could you even forgive yourself?
you knew the answer to that too. the bitter truth that lingered on your tongue.
and, now it’s been half a year; six months since you said those words. twenty-four weeks since you broke his heart. 186 days since you began no contact. over 262,000 minutes since you’d made the worst mistake of your life. and, all it would take was five seconds for you to make another.
would closure, even now, still be beneficial? anything for you to realize that taesan hated you. anything to get you to leave it in the past instead of as an open book. anything to get you to move on instead of reread the stupid messages that send you hurdling to the bathroom, retching over the toilet. anything that stops you from googling the symptoms of heartbreak. anything to get you to stop replaying the memories against your eyelids when you're supposed to be sleeping. anything to get you to stop staring at his contact, finger hovering over the call button. maybe if he didn’t pick up that would be enough to deter you. maybe if it said his number was unavailable, that would be enough. maybe—
“fuck.” you panicked. “oh my god.” you repeated it a couple more times as you smashed the red circle at the bottom of your screen. you didn’t even give it enough time to either, let the call go through, or let you know that you could no longer contact him… even if you someday mustered up enough courage to.
the sky was pouring down with your mood. he was the best, worst mistake you've ever let into your life.
you felt guilty. guilty you swung the door open. guilty you got so far away just to turn the car around. guilty because you had no explanation—you weren’t even drunk. but, guilty for feeling guilty. guilty for wondering if he’d see your contact and remember the cruel words he knew in the back of his mind weren’t true, and you knew that hurt him the most. you knew you were cruel for not giving him a reason to end something that otherwise could’ve been great. cruel to pretend like you wouldn’t wait for him at the bottom in any given life. but, cruel was what you had to be, right?
you couldn’t make him happy, like he made you. you couldn’t make him comfortable in public spaces, like he made you. couldn’t bring him peace of mind, like he could you. couldn’t be the person he could imagine his life with in a two-story house, or apartment with a view. couldn’t be the person he painted in his head, the girl he wanted so badly—you were only so flexible.
you couldn’t ever be enough for someone who so desperately gave you the world.
it was your fault you let it get so far in the first place. you made him the current—it was your fault you couldn’t let go. it’s not like he kept contacting you, or even tried to see you after the breakup. you were the desperate ex. you were the person who thought it was a mistake but...
you were the one who ended things. you were the one who lied all those months ago. you were the one who broke his heart, and your own as collateral. and now, you couldn’t convince yourself it was a win-win situation at all.
you loved him. no, you love him.
still, he had a tight hold on your heart. even through radio-silence and tormented nights, he had you. and, you never hated it as much as you did now—because you didn't have him in return. you had no clue if he was laying with another girl when your finger hit the call button. was she better? prettier? nicer? did the conversations flow? you had no idea if he had moved on easily like you'd been wishing, underlined by the opposite. you had no idea, and that was the worst part. you could say it was his fault you felt like this, but in reality, it was yours, and you knew that too.
so, closure—in whatever fucked up form—would never be stronger than the tides pulling you back to him.
now, you were here, staring at the crash—the wreck—back where it all went haywire. back where you ripped your heart out and threw it into the crashing waves against the shore. was it stupid to believe it wasn't somewhere far out now?
you heard the risk of jumping into the deep end was drowning, but you held your breath, taking a leap of faith and awaiting the cold water to bring you back from a fantasy that isn't written to come true. he wasn't the wave to your wind, dependent on the ever-changing weather inside you. he wasn't the picnic blankets, fruit baskets and smiling faces. he was the thin line where the sky met the sea. he was the wet sand that people drew poetic lines in. he was the umbrella that got picked up and closed after a good day, ruined by a downpour. the chilled feeling during a heatwave. he was something you knew was too good to be true. something marked with an X you'd spend your whole life searching for—dedicated to a whisper.
you were swallowed whole, in the belly of a title that you no longer could even call you, spinning with the whirlpool. everything you'd suppressed had come back, crashing against your ankles and shins hard enough to make you lose footing and fall flat on your back.
it would knock the wind from your lungs, but it wouldn't feel any different than standing completely still.
"oh," no, he didn't feel any different than standing complexly still. "i guess i should've known better."
"yeah," you replied into a thin breath. "i should've… i really should’ve."
it was all hanging over your head, the sharp end of the sword readying itself to come down on you. would it hurt any more than seeing taesan back at the spot where you two broke up?
you couldn't will your head to turn, but the presence was ever-felt. a presence that used to make your heart turn and stomach beat; or maybe it was the other way around?
you were ever confused on how you got a lucky star out of the millions of ordinary ones. you never understood why he, of all people, chose you. you never understood but nonetheless thanked the heavens; the oceans; the gods; the myths; the planets; the creatures; for bringing him to you.
because you got to love him... once.
and, now that the humidity had subsided, you could see through the fog… he wasn't there. he wasn't the sunshine that warmed your skin. he wasn't the rain that slicked your hair down. he wasn't the breeze that would turn the pages of your romance book unwillingly. he wasn't the playful screeches of couples tossing each other into the cold depths. he wasn't the cliffs people dared to jump off of. he wasn't the sunset proposals, and i do's. he wasn't a first date spot, or pretty photo-op.
but, he'd always be the tide that pulled you back to him; he'd always be the tide you wish you could've overturned. the current you'd swim against for a lifetime. and, you’d wait until the oceans dried out to discover the 80% you never got to know.
he was nothing more to you and, definitely, nothing less.
reblogs, likes and comments are greatly appreciated! thank u!
— tag list .ᐟ @lilriswife4life @blumisiu @jakeify | send an ask to be added c:
very much inspired by jonny (and jonny reprise) by faye webster
please ignore any errors! thank you :)
My Type.
They always ask, “What’s your type?” or “What do you look for in a relationship?”.
Questions I’m scared of answering, because, what should I say when you’re the first thing I think about? I don’t mean to, but it keeps returning to you. I know we’re done, I know that there’s nothing between us anymore, so why? Why did you treat me so well? Why were you everything that I wanted? I was ready to be your everything. So why, why weren’t you ready? Taesan tell me, did you ever love me? You never told me so I wouldn’t know. I can’t even be in my own room without thinking about you. All because you told me to paint these stupid walls white. You told me,
"A white wall may seem empty. But it's ready to be filled. And, in its readiness, needs nothing. It stands complete"
God, why the hell did I listen to you? Why the hell did I ever love you? Why are you still everything that I want? Why are you happy and going on with your life while I’m still here? Stuck in a room with white walls. The same room where we’d watch movies on my bed, paint empty canvases on my floor, hang up our photos on top of my bed, figure out outfits together, sleep together, and discuss our future together.
I still love you Taesan. Those questions were never about you, but I guess it is now.
authors note:
helloo! i'm back >< released this as a little sawry for not releasing in a while :c hope you like it! i love jonny by faye webster so i decided to write a little something inspired by it.
helloo!! huhuhuu sorry i disappeared for like more than a week, had a lot of things happening during the past few days ㅠㅠ hope you guys understand!! i will be update my reality soonn! not sure when but maybe on monday? sorry again! missed you guys :)
a/n: cause if one day u wake up and find that ur missing me and ur heart starts to wonder where on this earth i could be thinking maybe you'd come back here to the place that we'd meet and you'll see me waiting for u on he corner of the street (if u understand kiss me).
10 things i hate about you + the notebook references
wrote this while i was sick so if u hate u hate sick ppl | @onedoornet
riwoo and taesan laid on jaehyuns bed watching him spin on his chair
“i dont know what to do…do i just give up?? she already has jeong-“
“gosh please dont say his name.” taesan grumbled
“i cant stand hearing him one more time without seeinf his feet in my face.” taesan looked up at the ceiling. riwoo sat up looking at jaehyun
“sorry, but theres no point in chasing after yn anymore” jaehyun out his head in his hands
“what do you mean theres no point? you did all this work just to end up back at no where?” riwoo stood up and walked towards jaehyun
“maybe this was just some dumb lesson that this will be a mistake ill have to live with for the rest of my life”
riwoo saw the tears start to form in jaehyuns eyes and sighed
“jaehyun do like yn or not?”
jaehyun nodded
“and was she worth all this trouble?”
“she is but jaehyun-“
“STOP IT!” taesan yelled
“jeong jaehyun” riwoo started
“STOP” they both looked over at the black haired boy sprawled out on the bed
“he isnt half the man you are and he certainly isnt the man who yn. go.
go get your girl.”
jaehyun jumped to his feet and ran out the house
“is he gonna run to her house…?” taesan propped himself up
“love is love taesan”
-
the whole day moved in slow motion. between your thoughts on the date tonight, to the night with jaehyun. suddenly the clock fast forward and now it was 6:30. you were already ready, but not dressed as you were currently walking back and forth debating on going to the bathroom and washing your face and just going to bed and canceling the date.
just then the doorbell rings, mentally cursing yourself, the clock reads 6:37. why was jeong jaehyun so early? making your way to the door you peer it open slightly
"give me 5-"
"yn."
myung jaehyun stood out there and he seemed stressed, widening your door he walked in.
closing the door behind you, you stared at his back as he turned away.
"i knew you were debating on going on the date, yn...
go on the date.
go on the date with him"
you stayed silent and jaehyun turned around to you, walking up to you he grabbed your hand into his.
"do you miss me?" he asked staring into your eyes hoping for a clear answer
"i'm not sure how i feel...
i feel like that i like you but i dont know jaehyun"
he nodded and smiled slightly
"go with him"
"but you didnt-" you said eyebrows furrowed not wanting to betray jaehyun as he didn't go on his date
"i knew what i wanted yn, i wanted you, it's always been you. go on the date and if tomorrow, one day, one month, one year
fuck, just anytime if you even feel it in your bones that you miss me, come back to the place where we met and I'll be there. you don't have to know what you want. you don't have to feel like you want to forgive me or a relationship, but as long as you want me I'll be there for you to come back to. i'm not going anywhere
I'll wait as long as i need until you want me again."
the bell rang making you look over at the clock, 7:01. you turn back to jaehyun and see him nod. running back to your room you quickly get dressed and grab your things.
"i'll leave after you, i promise to lock your door"
smiling at him you open the door away from myung jaehyun.
-
it wasn't that the date was unenjoyable, it wasn't for you. jeong jaehyun didn't prioritize you. he didn't prioritize your opinions, feelings, or wants. he constantly talked about himself, his goodlooks, his trophies, his life, he just wasn't who you saw yourself waking up to every day. tapping the glass cup that was in front of you you ignored everything he said
while he was talking you heard something from the other table that made you dilute whatever jeong had to say.
"i think we should end things"
"what? are you serious?! after everything we've worked through and done together? youre just gonna throw it away?"
"its not that its just me. i just think this relationship will distract me from my job"
"hey...i'll be there for you, through the good and the bad. we never know until we try."
"i have no doubt youre going to be there for me, your that kind of person and that's why i love you, but I'm scared I'm going to hurt you."
"and you think ending things won't hurt me? even if its on good terms it might as well end on bad terms...
can you live without me?"
you see the other person shake their head
"then if you break up with me you're going to miss me either way. and come back, so why make it harder for yourself and mess up now when you don't even know? maybe we can work through it, i want this to be something that makes our relationship stronger, not harder.
cause thats what love is
and i love you, so much."
"yn?" jeong jaehyun asked
"yeah?" you said being knocked out of lalaland
"did you even listen to me talk about the history of football?"
"i- uh....
i need to go."
good thing you hadnt ordered anything yet because you took off running ignoring your name being called from jeong, you knew you had one place to go and one place to be
home
"wow shes a fast runner" jeong jaehyun said as he watched you run
-
"can you get out of my house"
woonhak groaned for the 47th time as jaehyun paced back and forth in his living room as he edited the new clips.
"so you dont yn to go on the date with the other jaehyun and then you ran here just to walk around ?” woonhak asked resting his head on the couch pillow and staring at jaehyun peeking from the window
"i'm waiting for some...one" he said as he fixed the blinds trying to find the perfect angle "why are your blinds so stiff?" jaehyun complained
"i never open my blinds" woonhak shruged "so why are you waiting for yn at MY house?"
jaehyun looked over at woonak and spoke "we met here, when you introduced her to me that day."
"okay so why do you have to meet her here NOW?"
"you dont get true love do you?"
"i dont get maniacs"
"if she changes her mind this is the first place she will go-"
thats when woonhaks door gets banged on
jaehyun runs to the door and opens it, you jump to wrap your arms around him to which he wraps his arms around you
"can you live without me?" you asked as you look up at jaehyun
he shook his head
"good, cause i want you. and we're going to have to work though this together if you want me too...
i want this whole breakup thing to make our relationship stronger, i want us to last and I'm willing to fight for us because i want you and me to be the ideal image for romance, even during times when it gets hard for us. i just need you to not leave when it does..."
he nodded and smiled a bit
"i wont leave you anymore...
have you been listening to my music?" jaehyun called you out recognizing the lyrics
you let out a laugh "way to ruin the moment but maybe..."
"perfect."
you both turn to see woonhak filming with his phone
"oh i'm so passing this class!
okay i'm serious get out, both of you. also lock the door on your way out."
"so are you guys like friends now?" woonhak asked as he recorded the 3 of you guys walking to the park together for a shoot.
"yep, we're best friends!" jaehyun said as he wrapped an arm around your shoulder. "don't push it myung" you glared at jaehyun making him turn to you and sulk, "you said we were friends though" he mumbled.
when you guys finally got to the park woonhak ran away hiding somewhere trying to find a good place to record you both without being caught. as he found a space, he zoomed into you and jaehyun walking. it was quiet for a bit before jaehyun spoke up "I'm sorry...i don't know why I'm so awkward alone with you..." he laughed slightly. you turned over to him and grinned at his loserness, "you're fine, we just worked things out like...yesterday. i wouldn't expect you to be all buddy-buddy with me you know?" he nodded and it went back to silence.
...
"how was your date with jaehyun?"
"i didnt go on a date with you...do you mean the fish one?"
"nono, JEONG jaehyun"
making an 'o' shape with your mouth you nodding understanding him now
"it was okay...i mean you should know, you were there." you smiled "i mean, it seemed like he was more on a date with me than you, he just ignored you and talked to me the whole time." "wow, way to rub it in myung..."
"no! i didn't mean it like that, i just wanted to know if you liked him or anything...just curious..." he peeked at you to see your head turned to him as you guys kept walking "well i didn't get to know him that much to like him you know? maybe if me and him actually TALKED, i could've but he wanted to go to a shooting range..."
jaehyun busted out laughing to which you playfully hit his arm "i took you on a better first date right?" he turned to look at you. and maybe it was the first time he fully looked at you since you two had met again but it seemed to him that you had gotten more beautiful than before, which he didn't even know was possible but it felt like he fell in love again for the first time. "you took me to a trampoline park on our first date..." "which was fun right?" "yeah, it was fun...really fun actually, then you took me to the laundromat because i told you my washing machine broke and you needed to do laundry" "hey we had hours to talk, a vending machine to which i paid for anything you wanted, as well as fresh laundry to come home to" "i never told you how much i enjoyed that, or when we went to the lame comedy club and wrote down our rankings on a piece of paper" you both stared laughing as you remembered the moment "i remember silly soosan, all we could write on her ranking was 'boo tomato tomato'" laughing you slightly lean towards him. "remembering these moments reminds me that our relationship wasn't so bad" you said looking at your feet, jaehyun nudged you a bit "ouch, but fair enough...
do you ever wonder how our relationship could've been if i didn't mess it up? like what would we be doing right now?"
"probably at another laundromat, ive been too lazy to do laundry."
"oh i get it, you would want me to do your laundry for you"
"and you would do it"
"i would..." he said under his breath
"what'd you say?"
"nothing."
"you would do my laundry?" you repeated
"oh i hate people like you, you guys pretend not to hear something then say exactly what i just said
but im serious." he stopped walking and held your hand making you stop to look at him
"what would we be doing if we stayed together"
"do we fix our issues?" you asked
"i mean we would have to sooner or later" jaehyun tilted his head slightly grinning
"do you choose music over me?"
"well, since we fixed our issue, no. no i wouldn't choose music over you"
"then we'd be-" you were cut off by your name being called.
"YN! YN!"
turning your head you see jeong jaehyun running towards you. when he caught up to you and jaehyun, jeong jaehyun caught his breath "hey..." he looked at you before turning to myung jaehyun. "whats uo Brodie" jeong said as he dabbed up myung.
"yn..." jeong jaehyun started "i wanna make it up to you and take you on a date to fix the first one"
jaehyun 1 felt like jaehyun 2 shouldve just slapped him at that point.
suddenly woonhak and leehan jumped ontop of jeong jaehyun
"WHAT THE FUCK- YN ILL PICK YOU UP AT 7 TOMORROW"
"KEEP WALKING
KEEP WALKING"
"NO-"
"JUST KEEP TALKING ILL TAKE CARE OF THIS"
"YN-"
the mix of leehan and woonhak fighting jeong jaehyun made you and the original jaehyun run.