The messages on my phone you’ll never see the ones I send over and over watching the screen turn green. Delivered never to be read.
They come in moments apart but you’ll never notice.
My thumbs tap to the heavy heartbeats in my chest.
My fingers race against my screen like they’re running out of time.
Hoping she gets to convey into words everything that is on her, the sender's mind.
Her chest beats, her fingers flow, her words start to become unsteady but no one will ever know she hits send then send again sending herself into a trail with a desperate end.
She pleads with the phone in her hands.
Please don’t leave me, don't you understand?
“I love you, I love you..” she whispers into the space between each hyperventilating breath as her lips gasp for air in between each syllable she speaks.
tears begin to flow and her hands start to tremble then slow
The keys become quiet as she crumbles under the weight of her own whispered reassurances.
Her phone falling loose from the grip of her shaking hands the screen glowing faintly
“Notes:That the Sender Will Never Send”
About: Anxiety of separation, overwhelming thoughts, emotions heightened and desperate thoughts, overreliance, codependency, BPD, nervous system trashed
