Dragonfly Rachael

Forty something, married mum of one, just starting to make sense of life! .

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Late in the day to the party but that doesn't matter really. I don't rightly agree with having these specific days - we shouldn't need reminding to be #proud #celebrate our achievements or raise #awareness and fight #inequality it should be something we just do 🤔 Regularly and to each other, not just notible or famous women. 🌹 My job puts me in the perfect position to #supportwomeninag and #rurallife to celebrate themselves and be proud of what they do. It's not natural to many of us to do this and be #confident. I have struggled myself in the past and there are #women who have supported my growth which has led me to being in the position I am now. One lady in particular is the gracious @rosiewitheycoach Rosie has coached me and taught me how to understand my #emotions It's been the catalyst to big shifts in my life and I will be eternally grateful for the guidance Rosie has given. #happyinternationalwomensday but not just for today, for every day to come. We are all equal and we are all powerful in so many ways and in our own right. Take care, Rachael 🌹 https://www.instagram.com/p/CMLK6IuhTo7/?igshid=10qlrnkn0bkh1

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Just because you don't have a show home and your sink is full of washing doesn't mean your mindset is wrong! This is my kitchen and the sink this morning 😳 I need to teach hubs to wash up after cooking 😂 The Hello Fresh box is being saved for collecting some more hens so is safe inside! If you have a house that's in a constant state of disarray and it stresses you out cut yourself some slack. Let's look at things from a different angle... Are you being fair on yourself with the chastising talk that's probably going on in your head? If you walked into your friends house right now (soon to be reality) and it was in a similar state would you suddenly give out to her? Doubt it. You'd probably say "Hey don't worry about it, the family are happy, you've got plenty on your plate at the minute and time will soon be on your side to have a clean round.' Put things in piles, push the hoover round what carpet you can see and breathe. Take 5 minutes to plan your upcoming attack and until then accept its not how you want it but it will soon be 🌹💕 (at Horncastle, Lincs) https://www.instagram.com/p/CMCR22YhPzZ/?igshid=kl00n8arcufj

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Evening ladies, It's getting late and I really should be getting some shut eye but thought I'd do a post before lights out. On the #farm here we've started #lambing 🐑 first proper day of it today. This chap was brought into the world under our noses and we didn't notice 😂😳 cheeky mum. It's the time of year I start to stress a bit! Made fractionally worse this year with having a son home too... But using what I've been learning about how to listen to my #emotions, dealing with the #present by being #mindful and practicing #gratitude among other things I'm able to go with the flow more. As you will see the tunnel frames are bare behind the ewe and lamb. We usually house the inlambers in them! We've had the new covers since last summer! I'd normally get a stress on about being unprepared and nag my hubby or get crabby with him. However I've taken stock of our #relationship and what I would like from life and have realised that if he's happy with how things are on the farm then that's good enough for me. I'll support him when he needs me but it's not for me to worry about things like tunnel covers. Do you #stress about things that really you don't need to? What actually matters to you and are you giving it enough #attention? If you want to work things through and get clear on what you need to focus on get in touch for a no obligation chat 🌹 (at Horncastle, Lincs) https://www.instagram.com/p/CL-Y1bAB8d-/?igshid=104svzdyg4qqv

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How many of us have 101 things to juggle in our lives? #Business, house, #family, shopping etc... I was like it and started looking at ways I could ease the pressure in areas of my life. Something that caused me immense stress were meals and what to cook for a hard working and often hungry #farmer. Our knackerman had mentioned in a conversation that he and his wife used @hellofreshuk So a few weeks ago I double checked my memory was right and asked him who he used and he gave me a discount code. We are now three boxes in 😊 and we're loving them. My hubby and I have just cooked a meal together - unheard of! I no longer stress and then panic at night trying to think of what to cook when I'm tired myself. We have three meals a week and usually cook them when hubby is away working as we are both under more pressure / tired on those days. I don't stress so much about food shopping either 🥴 we just top up on general items and the like. We don't eat rubbish for the rest of the week mind but having, what to me is, a stressful thing taken care of has made a massive impact. Don't be too proud to take advantage of alternatives to ease your load. 💚👌🏼 (I haven't been paid for this post it is purely my personal experience.) https://www.instagram.com/p/CLr_Lh3hUKR/?igshid=nhxjo1vkljqk

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Hi all,

How's 2021 going for you?

Has it been a bit rough? How about we make small changes to your mindset to help things get smoothed out??

Here's my #alphabet for 2021 of #habits and traits we can work on to help shift our #mindset and #positivity in the right direction.

A -

Quite a big one to start with 😉 one that's close to my heart as its been a personal game changer for me.

ATTITUDE:

Jack Sparrow said the best thing ever about it....

"The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem."

This was such a kick up the backside for me. I was a "this always happens to me." "why can't things go right for me" type of person. When I started working on my attitude to the problems it was such an experience.

In Parelli if your horse does something 'unexpected' they have a saying to say, instead of getting frustrated or angry, it's "How interesting."

So when faced with a problem that you might normally get frustrated or even despondent with, pause, acknowledge your thoughts and question how you can approach it in a different way. You could even say "How interesting this seems to be repeating itself, what pattern is happening here and how can I change it?"

Look for a solution and way to change the pattern. Being proactive rather than reactive can set you on the right road to overcome the problem with a #positive #attitude.

Stay safe and smile,

Rach 🌹💚

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Is your head making you feel like the first photo? Dull, not able to feel positive, struggling to see a clear path to take! But you'd like to feel like the second photo? Bright, with a good view of where to go and feeling motivated. I am currently offering two ladies the opportunity to have four 1-2-1 mentoring sessions free. If you would like to be considered for one of the places please get in touch by DM or email [email protected] Please include a little bit about yourself, any current difficulties you have and what you would like to achieve. Taking the first step to change can be hard but with support you can do it. (at Horncastle, Lincolnshire) https://www.instagram.com/p/CK6L4gahvn1/?igshid=arzzt9q4l62h

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I had wanted to write a meaningful post detailing the crappy day I had recently. Goodness it was a stinker. Basically to share and show you ladies that it's OK to have some rough days. But because I didn't get it written down when it was fresh in my head and then my days following have been such different days I have lost the train of thought I was putting into the post!!

However all is not lost. I had a blindingly awful day, not helped by my Shit Slinging Sister (SSS for short and not a person but rather my negative side) mumbling along most of the day things like "huh you're in a bad mood, why?" or "mmm everyone's out to get you and dump more work on you!" or "you shouldn't be in this mood, get on and snap out of it!" Urgh goodness she's a handy lass to have around... NOT! 😂

It was only when I realised I needed to listen to what my body was telling me did things start to shift. I'm hormonal, had the most horrendous nights sleep and had the pressure of being expected to go sort sheep with son knowing we'd be late getting done, thus tea would be late etc etc. I said no to sorting sheep, that was one weight shifted. Then I hit a brick wall in my energy level and just went "sod it I'm having a nap!" Blessed am I that son was content watching whatever it was he was (tarantulas being fed and watered I think 😳) and left me in peace to snooze.

I was literally a different woman once I emerged from my slumber.

Lessons learnt -

1 - don't drink tea at bedtime now I'm drinking mostly water during the day. The caffeine is too much!

2 - listen to your body and if it's telling you it's tired or hurting or whatever don't ignore it. Do something about it.

3 - We are not machines and so if one day you find you're berating yourself with the "you should xyz." mantra just give SSS a talking to and tell her to bloody well pipe down. You're a kick ass lass the vast majority of the time, one day here and there when it falls to pieces isn't a major disaster, its called life.

You are enough, you are capable & you are strong.

Rach 🌹

Credit: unknown

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Good morning everyone,

It's not the most pleasant of days out there given the weather so be careful if you do venture out.

Yesterday I was having a few moments quiet as I fed my mare Gem and snapped this picture to remind myself of the calm and relaxation I was feeling. Visual things can trigger big changes in our feelings and thoughts so I like to take photos when I'm feeling emotions I want to connect with on tough days.

We all walk round with camera phones these days so why not try it yourself. Next time you see something that makes you marvel or feel calm or accomplished take a photo and really feel the feelings you get from the scene, taking in the sounds, colours, smells, any taste and the sensations in you. Then next time you feel under pressure have a look at your photo and see what happens. Maybe even create a file on your phone in the gallery so you can instantly access your own personal visual pick-me-up.

Have a great day,

Rach

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Ice feather When you stop and look around you there is so much to see. This mornings frost sent this feather. A sign of peace and tranquility. #mindfulness may seem to be a buzz word to many or even mumbo jumbo but just stop and consider it. If your mind is in the here and now you can't worry about things. You can't stress about the unknown. You can't panic about what others think or do. Your mind can't play tricks on you. Imagine what you might actually see in a day. Try it. Get a piece of paper and record what you notice in your day tomorrow. For now I'll leave you with my feather. 🙏🏼🌹💚 https://www.instagram.com/p/CIEe_gODwit/?igshid=1nh3xgjfdtb4k

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A friend recommended @iamcarriegreen 's book 😳 #shemeansbusiness If you have a business idea and you're floundering, buy this book 💣💥💣 not just a business guide. Thank you Carrie for writing it 🌹💜 #mum #femaleentrepreneur #bestbook #mindset #selfdevelopment #grow #personaldevelopment #countrylass #nlp #lifepurpose https://www.instagram.com/p/CH3TmoSDH0E/?igshid=1wjhhhu1tkd3k

[holistichome-deactivated2021030]

Affirmations for mamas:

I am a good mother

I am exactly who my kids need

I am doing my best

My family love and value me as a mother

I am enough

I am not "just" a mother

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This fell in my lap just at the right moment. 👆🏻🙏🏼

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Authentic

Be authentic they say! How, when you don’t know what authentic you looks like? When you’ve spent so long keeping ‘you’ hidden to fit in or to conform to the demands of society, family or your peers.

Feeling numb is authentic isn’t it? That’s how I’ve felt for years. Feeling not much of anything. Sometimes there’s glimmers of the old me, the younger me, happy, joyful, excited and enthusiastic, but that doesn’t last long. 

I’ve been a people pleaser for so long I’ve lost my authenticity. I know the ‘anger’ and ‘frustration’ is authentic but that’s not the real me. It’s a product of the people pleaser I became to fit.

But what if I find my authentic self and she’s so different to who I am now that my Hubby doesn’t love her anymore? That would crush me. But what’s hiding the real me doing to me? I keep testing the waters with Hubby and we’re still good. But I’m still not sure who I am!

I know I’ve changed to fit the world. People might say I’m an extrovert because I talk and am quite forthright. That’s not the real me. I’m an introvert really, as shy as my Hubby was when I met him, quiet and reserved. I can do extrovert, but that’s not who I am.

I know the real me is making an effort to show herself, but it’s scary coming out, isn’t it? 

It’s not too late, #myrightmind will win over and my authentic self will shine. I just have to be patient and give her the time and help she needs.

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The old patterns.

She's trying to rear her ugly head, the grouchy bitch. My old mindset pattern. Woe is me, it's always me doing the work, I don't get to do what I want...

I started the day badly, with my attitude. My expectation of some peace first thing, broken. I was disappointed and let that rule over my mind and dictate my emotions. I get short with Smallage and pissed at Hubs.

I can see what was happening now, while I sit drinking my tea. What can I do to alter my mindset?

My body is telling me something, I can feel it tense and the nerves firing. Closing my eyes I ask it what it's telling me... I get a brown log. I don't try to make sense of it but give thanks and open my eyes. The nerves have settled. Cleansing breath, the things that don't serve me passed out with the air from my body.

🥰🌹

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😭 Why do I bother.... Wrote a post... Wanted to link it to tumbler but needed to sign in. Forgot my password... Left Insta and although I copied my post it's disappeared 😭 Lesson learnt - save draft in future 😂 So what was I going to waffle about...? As you can see I've shared a stunning photo 😂📸👌🏼 I haven't seen this view for a few days... Smallage is off school. So we've no routine. Lazy mornings and the like! Thought as I'm awake early I'd get some peace 😂 But it's like 'he's' got a radar... 🚫🧨📢 He wakes up early. No peace. Breathe, unclench the jaw... So looking for the positives 👀➕ We're up early, jobs will be done sooner and we can get home sooner. Ever have that conflicting feeling, you want to get out the house/away from things but hate being away from the house 😣 Yeah that's me. #mumlife #mum #countrylife #countrylass #farm #selfcare #mentalhealth #myrightmind #blogger #blog https://www.instagram.com/p/CHw54cPgs0U/?igshid=52iryg6xtxrv