[sapropel]

Show cock... NOW!!! *my eyes glow a blazing white and my telekinesis knocks all of the furniture in the room into the walls and crumbles them and shatters the windows*

[songtwo]

[clementine-kesh]

[divineandmajesticinone]

[f85o-deactivated20230618]

[memewhore]

[vympr]

i need this so bad

[fredersen]

[kaijuno]

[serial-kissing]

[evilvillain123456789]

my urine is always, always crystal clear. like a mountain spring. can you say the same?

[prrb]

No i piss like im spraying fermented brown mustard outta my cunt

[niedopalek]

goodness gracious

[kippered-tin]

Yeah uhh can i get a mcfunny with a side of gigglies...yeah with the teeheesauce

[transgenderization]

in the club gettign a drink would anybody else like a drink

[0111010001110010011000010111000]

in the club spilling my drink on you by accidnet srry

[transgenderization]

in the club going soggy mode

[britnxyspears]

[nflstreet]

me: *showing vacation pics* and this is from where we went t- 

 guy who plays geoguessr for 14 hours a day: I know.

[benepla-deactivated20180521]

everyday occurence

me: (on the wikipedia page of some obscure musician to see if they’re gay)

sidebar on the artist’s page: GENRES: folk, anti-pop, folk rock, FUCKPOP

me: what the FUCK is FUCKPOP (clicks)

very short page for the musical genre FUCKPOP: FUCKPOP is an experimental subgenre of the goth nintendo kids club funk genre. coined in 1542 by Romanian nuns, it is often confused with psychedelic tooth grinding, as both genres highlight the use of gun sound effects and playing the piano with bendy straws. LIST OF FUCKPOP ARTISTS: sufjan stevens, ludwig van beethoven, cocorosie, the wiggles, ke$hastuck

[batsandboba]

when i was in middle school Rude by bruno mars came on the radio in the car with my mom and at the chorus it goes “why you gotta be so rude, don’t you know i’m human too, i’m gonna marry ya anyway” and my mom now had her Disapproving Aura on and sighed and said. see this is why [my divorced uncle] married [his mean ex-wife]. what a sad way of loving. and 13yo me was like Oh Damn That Deep. and mentally filed away the lesson Popular Music Promotes Toxic Behavior Therefore Don’t Marry Someone Who’s Mean To You. and ever since then rude by bruno mars has made me just a little bit sad. cut to 5+ years later the song is no longer popular. i happen to hear it over the tinny speakers in a random fast food place. all at once i realize the lyrics are not, in fact, about marrying a girl despite her hating you (gonna marry ya anyway), but marrying a girl despite her parents hating you (gonna marry her anyway). 13yo me and my mom misheard the same lyric and never paid attention to the rest of the song. i am flabbergasted. one of the pillars of my childhood development has just crumbled in a Subway. i am frantically realigning my entire internal ethics system. the cashier still wants to know if i’m getting a cookie. nothing is real

[batsandboba]

my world is crumbling around me

[anemonequeen-moved]

we moan about how we're reblogging memes about being an adult or with adult themes (not in a sexual way in this case) and how it means we're all getting old, but isnt it great that despite everything we still find fun and humor in our adult lives?

[anemonequeen-moved]

i forgot what website i was on, hold on

[combatukulele]