Jess

21 | twilight shit post blog | A bonafide slut for Felix

[jaspersbat]

New Moon (2009) dir. Chris Weitz

[totallycorrecttwilight]

Renata: SKDJSKFJKDF

Felix: what is that

Renata: it’s a keyboard smash

Felix: how do I do it

Renata: just press anything

Felix: 7

[totallycorrecttwilight]

Felix, peeling a banana: May I take your jacket? Haha

Heidi: Do you think other people can't hear you?

[edwardsvirginity]

remember my post about “what if new moon, but it’s black and white when eddie leaves?” well i figured out how to do basic video editing and edited the entire movie so it’s black and white* from when Edward leaves to Volterra

here’s a lil excerpt

EDIT: tumblr hates piracy and would slam a ban hammer on me for posting links. you can def still watch the whole thing, but you gotta DM me for a link, sorry ://

*ok it’s not full b&w bc new moon is actually rlly visually dark and the full b&w would’ve just made it black. so it’s sepia-ish. sorry 

[music-and-dance-is-my-life]

Op, you are doing the lords work

[edwardsvirginity]

@twilight-af​ I’m so angry that you called sepia a khakhi filter but i’m more angry that you’re right

also i downloaded the highest-quality version of the film I could find and made the edit from that

[edwardsvirginity]

This comment about the khaki filter made me so mad that I:

–downloaded professional editing software

–taught myself how to semi-professionally edit

–re-edited the entirety of new moon to be real black and white

–learned how to color edit and track a moving object on a screen and edited the Edward Hallucination to be the only thing in color every time he appears in the movie, which i had to edit FRAME BY FRAME

–taught myself how to make color fade in and out (and how to accelerate and decelerate the timing) and re-edited the entire above ^^^ scene so that the color fades in and out with each chime of the clock, starting out in low saturation that gradually gets stronger the closer she gets to him

–figured out how to make color fade in SUPER gradually and faded in color while bella befriends jake, only to abruptly switch back to black and white when jake tells bella they can’t be friends anymore (pre werewolf reveal)

–made the edward hallucination more fully colored every time she saw him

–spent about 25 hours the last 2 days doing this, forgoing food and sleep 

sooooo… watch this fucking space as i drop clips of my edits over the next few days (and at some point, a link to the full, revamped, re-edited movie)

[validcharlieswan-archive-deacti]

This picture of Demetri I found truly is a gift from the heavens.

[demetriscloak]

my king is so fine thank you @validvolturi for a true blessing 🥰

[twilightrenaissance]

edward vs. bella’s oversized green sweater

[whatwedoinvolterra]

Felix and another member of the guard: *physically beating each other up*

Edward: Can I get a trial... Can I please get a trial

[witchinghour]

Before you, Bella, my life was like a moonless night. Very dark, but there were stars, points of light and reason. And then you shot across my sky like a meteor. Suddenly everything was on fire; there was brilliancy, there was beauty.

10 Years of The Twilight Saga: New Moon Released November 20, 2009. + +

[volturian]

The cinematography was so fucking beautiful in new moon. I personally hated reading it, it took me two years to finish it because I hated it so damn much. But i find it ironic how it’s my favorite film, which I think has to do a lot with how Chris Weitz interpreted it visually/artisticly. New Moons plot fitted an artistic visual much more than a book. It need that little push of a visual for people like me (who hated reading new moon) to completely respect it and find interest in it. He portrayed Bella’s sufferage and lonesomeness so well and the scene where Victoria is running from the pack hits so hard. He makes you feel that pure abandonment and fear of the unknown just by imagery. He made me feel the way the book should have made me feel.

[deansbuffyhasmoved-blog]

[stupidlamb-s]

Twilight timeline.  December.

[jaspersbat]

New Moon (2009) dir. Chris Weitz

[katerinadenali]

“You don’t irritate the Volturi, not unless of course you want to die.” 

[phantom-evil]

[captain-yeet]

Hell Hath No Fury... (Felix Volturi x Reader One-Shot)

Summary: The one day he leaves her alone is the day that it all goes wrong. When his mate is taken away from him, those that took her would surely regret it in their final moments. He is coming for them all now.

Pairing: Felix x Human!Reader

Warnings: Death, some violence and angst. So much. I went there with this one yall and I’m sorry in advance for emotions.

The one day Felix left you alone was the day he’d regret the most in his entire existence. A fledging coven that had a bone to pick with the Volturi picked the day that he was sent to go out on a mission to try their hand at infiltrating Volterra. They failed, of course, scampering away with whatever remaining coven members they had.

But they had gotten to you - torn you to pieces, and Demetri had balked at the sight of your lifeless form when he located you.

It was too late to save you. And everyone was dreading Felix’s return to Volterra.

When he did return, not even the masters had seen a vampire fly into such a rage that Felix did when the news was broken to him that the love of his life, the one he’d spend thousands of years waiting for, was callously and cruelly taken away from him in the worst way imaginable.

Keep reading

[hatake-queen]

I won’t forget when Felix choke slammed Edward into the damn floor in the Volturi throne room. Imagine not stanning.

[captain-yeet]

Don't You Knock? (Felix Volturi x Reader One-shot)

Summary: Finding out that vampires and soulmates existing in a single day is exhausting, let alone discovering you’re the mate of one. The night after the Newborns came to Forks, you get a surprise visitor in the dead of night.

Pairing: Felix x Reader

Word count: 2.8k

A little something I’ve been working on this past week and also to celebrate a wee follower milestone. Come get y’all JUICE, enjoy!

Slamming the door to your apartment with accidental unnecessary force, you shrug out of your frozen jacket and tossed it to the floor. Today had been eventful, to say the least. It began with helping out your supervisor with paperwork down at the police station and ended with a vampire practically starting a riot over you.

Oh, and vampires exist now. Neat.

You were only a few years older than Chief Swan’s daughter and he had asked something rather odd of you a few months back after she returned from disappearing to Italy; “Keep an eye out for her, will ya?”

So, you found a way to insert yourself into Bella’s life, like a friend with older sister vibes. She was none the wiser, and so were you in terms of what kind of shit the silly girl had gotten herself into.

Shrugging out of your pants, you let out a content sigh. “Right, relax time,” you breathed. No vampires, no pyres of burning bodies. Just me and some pasta.

You were just planning on tailing her and the gaggle of pale friends of hers to see what exactly they were up to. You’d seen them while out on a hike and immediately your suspicion grew when you saw Bella being carried down the hillside by her boyfriend Edward Cullen, accompanied by the largest wolf you’d ever seen.

Following them at a distance, the sight you stumbled across made you let out a very loud “What the fuck is going on here!?”

Keep reading

[edytheelizabethcullen]

My name is Edward Cullen.

That had been emblazoned on her collarbone since she was born. There was no reason to worry, she was one of the lucky half, born with a soul mark. She never had reason to worry.

Her mom wished for her to be blank, give her the freedom that she had never been granted. Her dad was happy that she got a normal first meeting.

Do you know why I pulled you over, ma’am? was written across Renee’s wrist, and Charlie had the corresponding, I was going two miles over the limit! was on his own. It was a true mystery why they were never going to work out, in the long run.

Sometimes that happened with soulmates. They had a brief time where everything was perfect and right in their own little paradise, then something would change and your soulmate either had to grow with you, or the relationship had to end. It wasn’t the norm, but it was acceptable enough. Just because someone was perfect for you doesn’t mean they stay that way.

Bella didn’t think about it much.

—

In the early months of 1987, Alice saw her brother’s future shift. She smiled lightly but kept the information to herself. It wasn’t until the summer of the next year when they were on vacation to a private island that Edward noticed the writing on his collarbone.

“Edward do you not shower?!” Rosalie asked, disgusted. “Alice, how long as it been there?!”

Carlisle chucked, “She’s certainly got some fight in her.”

“I’m sure she’s a lovely girl, right Alice?” Esme looked to her, as did her brother. Alice glared at him, refusing to look into his future. She blocked out what she already knew, instead repeating the exact measurements for each of their family members then converting it into the metric system and the Myanmar system after that.

Alice stepped behind Emmett just before Edward kicked sand at them, which quickly distracted the boys into a battle. Jasper joined in, knowing that Alice was relieved by the commotion. Edward was not going to mess up her chance at a best friend.

—

When the Cullen family moved into town, Chief Swan took a special interest in them. He knew what was written on his daughter, after all. None of them knew why, not even Edward. His thoughts were muddy, heavily protected.

Jasper knew he was not suspicious of them, just curious. Alice assured the family not to worry. Of course, Edward did. So did Rosalie, not that she would ever admit it. Emmett was, as usual, unconcerned. He turned over a cop car, a month after the Chief’s special interest though.

Carlisle had a hard time soothing that one over.

Otherwise, it was a quiet few years. That is, of course, until the Chief’s daughter came into town. After everything, almost killing this girl, the first thing that Bella Swan ever said to him was, “How do you know my name?”

He was definitely going to hell.