I make dumb SHINee imagines

because I’m stupid- OT5 friendly! (posts every 2:34pm BST/GMT!)

[dumbshineeimagineswiki]

Hello Shawols and welcome to this place that I call home!

Sibling accounts!

@dumbshineeimagines (Opened 25th of March 2022)

@dumbshineefics (Opened 25th of May 2022)

@dumbseriousshineefics (Opening soon!)

@dumbcomfortshineefics (Opening soon!)

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My name is Asahi (he/they) and I make imagines and stories for fun! As I’m going to turn 18 in July, I decided to move from apps such as Discord to Tumblr since apparently people tend to be much more mature and also I can meet older people here!

The reason why I moved here is because I want to create a space for Shawols (mainly Jonghyun stans) where I would do imagines/stories that would make anyone laugh due to the over-exaggeration nature of the fictional world of SHINee!

Do note that none of the imagines/stories does not align with how the members are in real life. They are even over-exaggerated to fit the “comedy” aspects of my jokes. Please do not take any of this seriously and hopefully you’ll be able to get a good laugh out of it during the more difficult times.

However, I do make comforting stories for those who are into that. I can do many types such as fluff, smut and even platonic. You can even suggest what imagines do you want me to do! Send a question about me if you’d like!

Hope you enjoy my imagines and you’ll have fun reading them!

Update (22/08/2022):

As of this date, two of my friends @naegashutyoassup (bruce - he/him) and @nihaojj (james/jack - he/him) will be taking over this blog for me so this blog can stay alive! 

You guys really missed my imagines and was hoping for any more content, but I actually don’t feel comfortable making SHINee related posts anymore due to personal reasons. My friends makes similar posts to me so hopefully you have just as much fun with them like you did with me! 

- Asahi (he/they)

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[Fic Lists] A list of my bizarre stuff!

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Note: if you’re reading this outside the wiki blog, click here for the latest update post of the imagines and story lists!

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Specials!

[Special Post] It’s Kim Jonghyun’s 32nd Birthday!

[Imagine - SHINee’s 14th Anniversary Special!] SHINee celebrates their anniversary with Shawols/Big announcement!

Imagines

[Imagine] You kicked SHINee on the balls!

[Imagine] Would SHINee go to your birthday party?

[Imagine] When you make SHINee wear a skirt/dress!

[Imagine] You made SHINee wear panties as a joke!

[Imagine] SHINee sees you get bullied!

[Imagine] When they find out they’re having a baby! (SHINee)

[Imagine] SHINee hears you fart!

[Imagine - April Fools Special!] What type of jokes would they do on you? (SHINee)

[Imagine] You raised your voice at SHINee!

[Imagine] You spilled ice cream all over their clothes! (SHINee)

[Imagine] What type of poop SHINee reminds me of!

[Imagine] Where would they pee themselves! (SHINee)

[Imagine] When SHINee sees a puppy!

[Imagine] SHINee finds a baby in a box!

[Imagine] SHINee goes into maury and they find out they’re the fathers!

[Imagine] You pooped in their house for the first time! (SHINee)

[Imagine] How they would react if they saw a cat getting ran over! (SHINee)

[Imagine] What would happen if SHINee were girls for 24 hours?

[Imagine] You gave SHINee socks as a present!

[Imagine] You kissed SHINee on the lips!

[Imagine] You slapped SHINee’s ass!

[Imagine] You gave them flowers! (SHINee)

[Imagine] SHINee tries out crack for the first time!

[Imagine] SHINee finds out that they’re pregnant! (with your child!)

[Imagine] If SHINee had girlfriends/boyfriends

[Imagine] SHINee finds a shop they like!

[Imagine] SHINee goes out with a skirt!

[Imagine] SHINee finds a “ring ding dong” toy on the floor!

[Imagine] You steal SHINee’s lollipop!

[Imagine] When SHINee gets their heads shaved! (For whatever reason tbh- military reasons, cancerous reasons, etc)

[Imagine] SHINee goes to a carnival!

[Imagine] You told SHINee that you loved them!

[Imagine] You paired them with each other! (SHINee)

[Imagine] You went to a playground park with SHINee!

[Imagine] Where would the f(SHINee) ships go on a date? ( f(x) x SHINee )

[Imagine] When they have kids! ( f(x) x SHINee )

[Imagine] When you accidentally drop ice cream onto SHINee!

[Imagine] SuperM rates SHINee by Jonghyun’s vocals!

[Imagine] You called SHINee chocolate!

[Imagine] You made SHINee watch boku no pico as a joke! (Part 1: Suggesting)

[Imagine] You made SHINee watch boku no pico as a joke! (Part 2: After watching)

[Imagine] You called SHINee cute!

[Imagine] When you ask for *just* water in a restaurant date! (SHINee)

[Imagine] When you dip your chips into ketchup in front of SHINee!

[Imagine] How SHINee would twerk!

[Imagine] How SHINee would kick Baekhyun in the balls!

[Imagine] When SHINee grows boobs!

[Imagine] When you ask SHINee to sit on their lap!

[Imagine] When SHINee gets their ring ding dongs cut off!

[Imagine] When SHINee sees Jisung from NCT get flushed down the toilet!

[Imagine] You asked SuperM which SHINee member has the best ass!

[Imagine] You called SHINee boring!

[Imagine] When SHINee sees your ripped pants!

[Imagine] You accidentally saw SHINee naked!

[Imagine] You raised your leg up in front of SHINee!

[Imagine] How child!SHINee would react when they overhear their parents doing the nasty!

[Imagine] You asked SHINee to flash their ring ding dongs!

[Imagine] When SHINee finds rule 34 pics of themselves!

[Imagine] How SHINee would strangle you!

[Imagine] Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? (SHINee) {Requested by my little sister}

[Imagine] When SHINee jumps off a cliff!

[Imagine] SHINee is at the hospital giving birth!

[Imagine] You brought a doll for SHINee!

[Imagine] You called SHINee ugly!

[Imagine] Which f(x) member would SHINee slap for 1,000,000 ₩?

[Imagine] What type of farts describes SHINee the most? (Requested by one of my friend)

[Imagine] How SHINee would look after a baby for their babysitting job!

[Imagine] How much does SHINee hate their co-workers’ girl group Aespa?

[Imagine] When SHINee bumps into a tree!

[Imagine] What would SHINee use to kill Baekhyun!

[Imagine] You told SHINee that you killed someone!

[Imagine] SHINee ranked from best to least by who can dance to “Last Last” by Burna Boy the best!

[Imagine] What would SHINee say about Victoria if they were virgins!

[Imagine] Who in SHINee would most likely eat a popsicle like a ring ding dong?

[Imagine] How would SHINee make you a skittle cake?

Stories (Non serious - Suitable for those who likes to laugh!)

Onew/Jinki

Jonghyun

Key/Kibum

Minho

Taemin

OT5

Ships

Stories (Serious - Suitable for those who prefer something mature!)

Onew/Jinki

Jonghyun

Key/Kibum

Minho

Taemin

OT5

Ships

Stories (Comfort - Suitable for those who are feeling sad or just want a feel good story!)

Onew/Jinki

Jonghyun

Key/Kibum

Minho

Taemin

OT5

Ships

More are coming soon! 🥰 (Posts every 2:34pm!)

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Post Schedule lays here!

[dumbshineeimagines]

@naegashutyoassup you really let this blog die lol

[dumbshineeimagines]

[Imagine] How would SHINee make you a skittle cake?

Idk do they know how to make a cake?

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Onew: He doesn’t. His dubulge knocked the skittles over so he is forced to use his last piece of chicken.

Jonghyun: He cooks the cake and then places the skittles on top.

Key: He uses a cake cutter on 4 bread slices and puts skittles on each layer with a very decorative topping with whipped cream.

Minho: He puts skittles in his butt and then comes to you butt naked to show.

Taemin: He just buys it from the shop.

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Moral of the story: SHINee doesn’t know how to bake, so don’t.

[dumbshineeimagines]

[Imagine] Who in SHINee would most likely eat a popsicle like a ring ding dong?

Can you please just stop saying this word ffs-

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Taemin: He has to be the most sussiest guy I’ve ever seen. I could imagine him closing his eyes just to slowly put it in his mouth and then start moaning for some reason. Definitely him.

Key: I could also see him doing that, but yet he’s still quite calm when eating a popsicle. Heck, he would probably twerk whilst eating the popsicle so yeah-

Minho: Minho is weird and sus, but not in that way. Probably does it for laughs but that’s pretty much it. Heck, he probably doesn’t eat in public because of that very reason.

Jonghyun: I don’t think he’s that sus, but he is definitely weird. But if I have to be honest, he’s more on the middle than at the very top. Like Minho, he probably does it for fun and to joke around, but that’s not how he actually eats.

Onew (aka our fake maknae): Of course he’s at the bottom (no pun intended) but seriously, he’s the most innocent man in the list. Yeah he does shit for fun, but it’s mostly just him enjoying the food and not creating food p0rn with his mouth. He can be a little weird, but he’s usually not and can be very mature with an innocent mind.

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Moral of the story: Find videos of them eating food and then close your eyes — you’ll thank me later.

[dumbshineeimagines]

[Imagine] What would SHINee say about Victoria if they were virgins!

How do you even know they aren’t virgins?

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(This is during the Replay era btw)

Onew: “Victoria is so nice! She gives me lollipops whenever I help her with the cups and plates!”

Jonghyun: “She’s so pretty, I need to give her flowers to make her happy!” (Pretty sure he would still say that regardless, but she also wants “that” flower if you know what I mean lol)

Key: “Jeez… she’s just a girl. Well… I guess she looks nice… fine, I like her face.”

Minho: “She’s so sweet and thoughtful and awesome to be around! She even gives me hot chocolate milk when it’s cold!”

Taemin: “Girlfriend? I’m scared of being Noona’s girlfriend… will she give me her warm hoodies and take me to fun dates?”

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Moral of the story: virgin shinee are so cute omggggg—

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[dumbshineeimagines]

[Imagine] SHINee ranked from best to least by who can dance to “Last Last” by Burna Boy the best!

Bruh I don’t even think they know this song-

Author: Shut up fam this is based on how they would feel the song if it’s being played.

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Jonghyun: Now I know you guys are probably thinking that this is favouritism, but NO. After speculating HUNDREDS OF GIFS of him dancing, I could tell you for a fact that THIS GUY CAN DANCE. Despite not having a lot of butt jello like the other members, HE KNOWS HOW TO WHINE AND HE COULD LITERALLY WHINE ON PEOPLE- if he knew the song, he would vibe very well and with that I would say 10/10.

Taemin: ALRIGHT. Taemin knows how to twerk, yes. However, he isn’t the best like Jonghyun. Sure he’s always getting whined on by him, but he isn’t as great. Definitely he has potential to whine as good as Jonghyun but he just isn’t there yet. I’m gonna give him a 8/10.

Key: Ehhhh… he’s alright. He isn’t the best, but he got the spirit. He knows how to twerk, but I’m not sure if he knows how to whine. But overall I like his energy so I will give him 7.5/10.

Minho: Yes I know my guy Minho has a big bunda, but I’m not sure if he could dance to Last Last to be honest. He might not know the song and would get confused with what dance move to make, but he’ll eventually get there and have the lord and saviour Jonghyun to help him by whining on him so he doesn’t seem too awkward. Do like his energy though but I’ll give him a 6/10.

Onew: I know you guys are probably going to hate by putting him last (last), but it’s true guys. I don’t even think he would know how to start. He would probably prefer to take videos or watch the other members dancing so he doesn’t do it himself. He’s definitely unfamiliar with the song and would be a little awkward dancing to it. But to be fair, he does have a little bit of potential. Since I’m nice, I’ll give him a 5/10 for effort.

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Moral of the story: I really don’t know what I’m talking about ask SHINee to dance to Last Last. Yep there you go.

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[dumbshineeimagines]

[Imagine] You told SHINee that you killed someone!

Yep… now THIS is random.

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Onew: W-WHA- BUT WHY? WEREN’T YOU CLEAN? OMG- WHY WOULD YOU DO SUCH THING?

Jonghyun: W-wow… really…? Who did you kill? Your friend’s uncle? Ahhh I see.

Key: Oooh nice! Nearly killed 3 people because they pissed me off. WAIT SERIOUSLY? I’m impressed!

Minho: U-uh… I think my m-mom is calling me… well- nice to see you! *leaves*

Taemin: Ooooooh! I’ve killed like 12 people in a span of 2 years! What gun did you use? A pistol? That’s so lame. You need a AK-47! That would get your target easier!

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Moral of the story: Uh… don’t get Taemin mad- that’s all…

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[dumbshineeimagines]

[Imagine] What would SHINee use to kill Baekhyun!

So you’re that kind of crazy, huh?

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Onew: With chicken bones, he doesn’t need them anymore so what?

Jonghyun: Man has the physical capacity to kill someone with his own hands, but he’s too nice to do that

Key: He would use a knife, for sure.

Minho: He would just get a rope and strangle him until he stops screaming like a mad man. Also, he was live so-

Taemin: He finna kill him with a gun like it’s fortnite and would even dance in his body

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Moral of the story: Please don’t encourage SHINee to kill Baekhyun because they WILL.

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[dumbshineeimagines]

sorryyyyyy i had so many other things to do 😭

[dumbshineeimagines]

[Imagine] When SHINee bumps into a tree!

That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever seen- anywho hiiiii!

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Onew: loses his memory, makes a boy group full with 4 chickens and snapped one day by eating all of them and made a memorial for chickenhyun, chickenbum, chickenho and chickenmin.

Jonghyun: miraculously survives but has to get a brain transplant from roo in which he falls in love and marries a random male dog and becomes a wine mom at the age of 35 dog years and became a grandma at the age of 60 dog years.

Key: survives but wonders what the fuck is going on with everyone.

Minho: suddenly thinks that he’s cristiano ronaldo and screams at others if they say otherwise. would most likely go up to random kids and instead of passing the ball he just shows off like those annoying ass people before booting it over the fence for them to get it themselves and he would act all proud like he has scored a goal.

Taemin: turns into a murder and after he has killed two women and a child he rushed to live in London where he would turn into a roadman by making dumb ass korean drill music where he would brag about killing people, makes ends meet by selling weed alongside with copies of his dumb tracks and would stab anyone if they get into their way — possibly even kill them. He ends up getting arrested and deported back to South Korea where he was sentenced to death and the only person who managed to bail him out was his number one biggest fan, KoreanBilly.

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Moral of the story: Don’t let SHINee hit a tree, I guess…?

[dumbshineeimagines]

[Imagine] How much does SHINee hate their co-workers’ girl group Aespa?

First day at the job, eh? We’re going to get along VERY well, Bruce.

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Onew: About 25%

Jonghyun: 1%

Key: 75%

Minho: 33%

Taemin: 99%

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Moral of the story: Promote Taemin to Aespa and he will beg you to bring him out so much that he would rather do stuff with SuperM rather than those girls. Also I love Aespa! Why does everyone hate them so much?

[fight-fight-minori-deactivated2]

okay so I know this makes some ppl uncomfy and others dont care but!

reblog if you’re okay with people spam liking your posts

im okay with it! just thinking this might help ppl

[dumbshineeimagines]

[Imagine] How SHINee would look after a baby for their babysitting job!

SHINee with babies…?

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Onew: *actually looks after the baby*

Jonghyun: *plays a lot of games and allows the baby to stay up until they’re tired*

Key: *takes a picture with the baby or if ugly he’d just film he doing something stupid*

Minho: *plays football with the baby and accidentally hurting them*

Taemin: *doesn’t even look after the baby*

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Moral of the story: I honestly wish I was SHINee’s parents. They seem fun to be around-

[dumbshineeimagines]

[Imagine] What type of farts describes SHINee the most? (Requested by one of my friend)

We’re back with a bang?

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Reference:

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Onew: Common Quack

Jonghyun: Slide Whistle

Key: Butt Putt

Minho: Howler/Laughtulence

Taemin: Swamp Ninja

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Moral of the story: SHINee stinks, a lot. You think they never ever smelt so bad even when they were boys?

[dumbshineeimagineswiki]

Heyo!

I’m so sorry I didn’t say this earlier but I actually decided to take a break from posting due to exams coming up. But don’t worry, I will be back on the 1st of July!

Until then, see you guys!

— Asahi (he/him)

(picture: @jjongbaby)

[dumbshineeimagines]

[Imagine] Which f(x) member would SHINee slap for 1,000,000 ₩?

Another f(SHINee) imagine?

—

Onew: Uh… I’d slap Amber since ViCtoRiA iS mY mVp

Jonghyun: N-none of them…? I mean… if I’m struggling, I could slap Luna… I hope she’ll forgive me and I can give half of my money for her medical bills!

Luna: *slaps jonghyun on the face*

Key: I’d do all of them. I mean… would that make 5,000,000 ₩?

Onew: They said one, you idiot-

Minho: Sulli would look like a badass with a slap mark on her cheek.

Jonghyun: So you’re saying you want to slap Sulli?

Minho: Didn’t you hear me?

Sulli: *slaps minho on the face*

Luna: *throws a rock at minho*

Taemin: I’d say none of them because girls are amazing and f(x) are amazing!

Seulgi and Wendy: *starts beating taemin up again*

Taemin: *groans* N-never mind… but still not f(x). But I’d like to beat up Red Velvet though-

Wendy: *gives taemin a black eye*

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Moral of the story: Don’t slap anyone. You should be like Taemin. But seriously, you should call out for help if you’re being abused like Taemin. That’s not healthy at all.

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[dumbshineeimagines]

[Imagine] You called SHINee ugly!

Ok what-

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Onew: O-ok…?

Jonghyun: W-why would you s-say that…? *might start crying*

Key: Ok and…?

Minho: Jeez, you didn’t have to tell me. I knew since I was born. I looked like a damn alien.

Taemin: B-but I thought you l-loved me… *definitely starts crying and runs away from you*

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Moral of the story: Don’t call SHINee ugly. Do you need glasses?