𝐃𝐕𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐍𝐒 / 𝐍𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐆𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 !
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𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐒 𝐍𝐀𝐄𝐒𝐒 / 𝐈𝐕𝐀𝐍 !
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@dvndelicns-archive
𝐃𝐕𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐍𝐒 / 𝐍𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐆𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 !
𝐘𝐔𝐋𝐈𝐘𝐀 𝐁𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐈𝐒𝐊𝐀𝐘𝐀 !
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𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐒 𝐍𝐀𝐄𝐒𝐒 / 𝐈𝐕𝐀𝐍 !
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ft. @tailordlve
it was difficult to act like nothing happened. it was difficult to wipe the amused grin that tried to appear on his face when he heard someone screaming that the king was dead. but hannes duty was fulfilled, while ivan’s had only begun. he didn’t care that he now needed to make sure people were going to the correct escape routes or make sure that no one was going to die trampled by others. that was going to be his alibi --- and, if anyone would point him as the murderer, he could always say that he was drinking with his friends and then was called by his superior, without time to stab the king to death. it wasn’t the best plan hannes ever thought, but it was what he could do at the moment. as the day passed, he was sure he would think of something better. his attention was taken by one of the queen’s pet grisha, a tailor. he couldn’t remember her entire name --- he kne wit started with lu, but nothing else. well, maybe it was time to know if someone saw him, anastas or val. “ excuse me, ma’am. ” he stated politely, a soft expression on his face. she was probably terrified. “ i know it isn’t the best topic to talk right now, but you’re one of the queen’s tailors, aren’t you ? did you see who did that to the poor king ? ”
ft. @sodaparticles ( anastas. )
he had been prepared for that moment since he was ten. since his whole family and village was slaughtered sixteen years ago, and a friend of his father took him into his home and treated him as his own son. hannes was told to do that to avenge his father and make him proud, but was ansgar naess proud of the murderer his son become ? that wasn’t the life he had idealized for his firstborn son, hannes was sure of that. he was supposed to stay in fjerda, and continue the the fishing business that was owned by his family for generations. no, to kill a king wasn’t what ansgar naess desired for hannes. yet, to know that it was him --- a limper orphan --- who killed a monarchy, brought a sense of pride, maybe a little too excessive, for him. nobody would suspect that he did something. ivan was just a guard.
yet, guilty started to eat him alive. he wasn’t feeling guilty because of what he had done to the king or for destroying a family, but for the friends he had bonded in ravka. what hannes did was going to change their lives, and he hoped it wouldn’t be for the worst. but the fjerdan spy also knew he shouldn’t hope for anything --- he didn’t know a thing about the crown prince, but he probably was as ill as him father. however, he and anastas had fulfilled what they needed to do in ravka. what would be of them, now ? would they stay in ravka or return to fjerda ? the thoughts about the future were becoming unbearable. he didn’t want to leave ravka, to leave the life he always wanted behind.
but anastas was alive. hannes wouldn’t be alone any more. it was better to return to a home where he didn’t have only dead friends and family, but hannes didn’t want to. in ravka he had everything, and in fjerda he had nothing. but it was what was going to happen --- their life as spies had endend when the king’s last breath left his mouth. he looked at his childhood best friend, a broken expression on his face. “ what we have done, anastas ? what we have done ? ”
sodaparticles·:
CLOSED STARTER FOR @dvndelicns· before
this was still something to get used to. anastas had been trained for almost all of his life, waiting for this moment. this moment, to infiltrate the little palace and help his country win the war against the ravkans. there were times he was unsure, times he wanted nothing to do with anything containing the word war, where he considered deserting to somewhere like the southern colonies or the wandering isle, somewhere where he wouldn’t likely be found. but he knew that would never be possible, and if he was ever going to be let go from the grasps of fjerda, it would be through death. somehow, he was okay with that.
he had been wandering through the little palace grounds, trying to get a grasp on the layout before beginning to find anything real or worthwhile of telling the superiors at the ice court. anastas was soon ripped from his own grueling thoughts as he bumped into a guard, someone with a familiar face though he couldn’t quite place it. his heart dropped, nervously smoothing his red kefta. he wasn’t ready to be interacting with people in the palace yet. “oh, pardon me, i don’t really… know where i’m going,” he said in his best ravkan accent.
the gardens were pleasant. hannes didn’t mind doing rounds around them, as much as he didn’t understand why they needed to be guarded. he never saw something dangerous in them --- only a few teenagers making out, but hannes thought that was what teenagers should do. but nonetheless, he preferred to do rounds on the outside than in the inside. he knew in the inside were the crucial information he needed to fulfil his duties with his homeland, but he was still getting used to see grishas walking as if they owned the world inside the little palace. he wanted nothing more than wipe those arrogant smiles he saw when doing rounds inside the little palace, but he couldn’t do much. not yet, at least.
the bump into someone caught him by surprise. hannes always tried to not get touchy with grishas --- especially the ones with the red kefta --- but maybe that wasn’t his day. however, that heartrender was familiar, somehow. hannes couldn’t say why or what was familiar in the other man, but he managed to make him remember of easy times, where he didn’t lose everyone he loved. “ it’s alright. ” hannes dismissed his apologizes, but narrowed his blue eyes, suspicious. how did a grisha didn’t know where they were going ? “ really ? are you new around here ? ”
sodaparticles·:
that was the thing– artyom didn’t know their parents. all he’d ever heard were stories, and stories of stories. stories of how alike he and his father were, stories of how their mother damned herself when she married a grisha, stories of how they died. artyom didn’t remember much of anything of his family, only what people told him, and he had no choice but to believe it.
artyom snatched their arm from yuliya’s grasp, but only after a moment. they were confused, they didn’t know how to react to anything yuliya told them. she had to have been lying to his face, right? how could one interaction unravel decades worth of teachings?
“mama and papa died going through the fold, like countless others. it’s no fault of the king. besides, i serve him on my own accord,” he said through gritted teeth, but he didn’t feel as certain as he spoke. at her question of their cousins, artyom tensed up even more. he had never been close with them, they always left him out– and when they died he only resented them more. unfair, yes, but he couldn’t help it. “i am uncle’s only heir now.” he said quietly, bitterness steep within his words.
.
she wouldn’t lie and say she wasn’t hurt by artyom’s actions. yuliya did want nothing more than just hug them, hold him as if he was still that same four-year-old boy of her memory. but, now, she accepted it. someday the healer would be able to do that again --- walk arm in arm with her brother, and laugh in the same way they used to did when their parents were still alive. yuliya knew hope was a dangerous thing, but she would do anything to have artyom’s love again. anything.
“ it may be that, but mama only returned to the army because the king asked her so. ” and their father because of the darkling, but they didn’t enter that subject yet. “ it is the king’s fault, because if he wasn’t a bloodthirsty fool, they would probably be still here. they left the army because of us, sobachka, and the king and the darkling made they come back against their wishes. ” was that going to happen to her too, if yuliya ever managed to have children ? leave the army for a while, and suddenly going back and dying ? it wasn’t fair to a child, as it wasn’t fair for them too. but yuliya wouldn’t be surprised if that happened. the pain in hers --- and in artyom’s, too --- veins was hereditary.
it was hard hearing artyom saying such things. yuliya could endure him cursing her countless times, but hearing they saying about serving the king with such naturalness was sickening. “ do you, really ? or uncle put that into your head, too ? ” it was the only explanation. their uncle already poisoned him against her, she wouldn’t be too surprised if pro monarchy propaganda was in his indoctrination too. however, artyom’s next words took her by surprise. “ i beg your pardon ? ” yuliya asked breathless, her brows arched. it couldn’t be true --- for years, she imagined her brother having a life where they could choose whatever they wanted to be, and to know that such duty was bestowed upon him made her heart break into a million pieces. “ you must be joking. please, tell me you're joking. ”
ft. @fcksacha
as if the night couldn’t get any worse, the king decided it was his time to die --- and what death was. yuliya was alone in the ballroom when it happened, trying to cope with what happened with her brother. the shock of knowing he was now the heir of their grandfather’s earldom was too much, and the healer didn’t acknowledge when she first heard the screams, at first, she thought it was a snobby noblewoman screaming at a servant. but other people started to scream, and she knew something was wrong. apparently, the king was stabbed by an unknown person. yuliya didn’t care for him, and if she could, would congratulate who did that favour --- but at the same time, his death left a bittersweet taste on her mouth. king vasily was bad, and she hated his bald head, but she feared is son would be worse. vasily lanstov had been young when he ordered ekaterina brangiskaya’s return to the army, and yuliya hoped his son wouldn’t tear apart families like his father once.
yet, all that commotion was leaving yuliya worried. what if the king’s death wasn’t made by a human, but by a khegurd ? she didn’t know if that was possible, because she learned what khegurds were not so long ago with zhuliu, but it could be a plausible theory. if shu han attacked the little palace in the last fête, she wouldn’t be surprised if they killed the king in another ball. however, if it was really caused by a khegurd, others could be in danger. and the whispers about an upcoming fjerdan attack weren’t helping her. yuliya’s mind thought instantly of the, now, four most important people of her life --- artyom, sacha, serafima and zhuliu. were they alright ? did something happen to them ? yuliya’s feet started walking towards a less crowded spot on the ballroom. maybe she could see them --- or she could help the injured, if they existed.
however, the sight of a flowing cape made yuliya stop dead on her way, her heart racing with hope. it was indeed him, and yuliya made her way to sacha, almost running, discarding her mask while doing so. she was tired to pretend not to feel anything for him, and the mask only remembered her of that. “ sacha ! ” she exclaimed when she got near him. only his sight made her crumble into the emotions she was holding since she stumbled into artyom, and to know he was well --- at least superficially --- made her eyes tear up. as much as daciana’s words still resonated in her head --- it won’t last, he’ll grow tired of you --- they didn’t stop her from hugging him. “ are you alright ? i heard... they said king is dead and some people are saying the fjerdans are attacking, and i thought... it didn’t matter what i thought. are you hurt ? ”
ft. @fcklidiya
he should feel, different, shouldn’t he ?
for years, hannes thought killing either the king or the darkling would bring peace to his soul. he never dared to hope to kill both, because then it would be naivety --- also, the darkling was too powerful to be defeated by a limping fjerdan spy. he always knew the king was going to be the easiest target, but hannes never thought he would finally stick a dagger in his heart and see the life come out of his eyes, his bald head hitting his throne, lifeless. he felt invincible seeing the look of horror on his eyes, and even recognization on them --- was that the sight the grishas who killed his family saw before slaughtering a whole village ? he wanted to scream to the whole world that it was a fjerdan orphan who killed the king of ravka.
but he couldn’t.
yet, as much as he wanted to be happy --- his life mission was finally complete --- hannes felt empty. so it was just that ? he spent his life training and dreaming of a moment that lasted just a few seconds ? and the most horrible realization was that it didn’t matter what hannes would do, his family would never come back. they were dead and buried in the cold lands of fjerda, all of them together in the afterlife, while he was there, fulfilling a revenge that he realized made no sense. and now that he finally killed the king, what would he do ? return to fjerda, to a life where all of his friends and family were dead ? to a life that he only had klaus ? he loved klaus as if he was his real, the only he lost sixteen years ago, but in ravka hannes had so much more. valentín and kajri --- who were made of the same flesh and soul as himself --- and lidiya.
oh, lidiya. what would she do if she knew the truth about hannes ? that he wasn’t ivan, the wuiet and ruthless guard who had a soft spot for her, who helped her with self-defence --- who, just hours ago, was dancing tenderly with her in a balcony ? that wasn’t fair with her. hannes was the one who chose that life, and he never wanted to drag her with him. it was almost a curse, and he accepted that romantic love wasn’t for him, but he wanted to try for lidiya. and it seemed like djel was punishing him --- or congratulating him --- because hannes was sure he saw lidiya’s blonde locks exiting the ballroom. “ lidiya ? ” he asked cautiously, trying to not sound as broken as he felt. “ lidiya, is that you ? ”
tailordlve·:
Lucrezia was still a bit star-struck, even after nearly eight years in the Little Palace and the Grand Palace. She’d grown up with more than enough, love and laughter and family - she wouldn’t change that for the world. But there was a special sort of magic and majesty in the capital that one had to fully experience in order to actually believe. She still found herself in awe of events and nights like these, and Lucrezia sometimes had the unfortunate habit of getting too swept up in this and missing what people set to her.
“What was that?” The tailor blinked slowly, started by a voice beside her. She smiled easily upon recognizing Yuliya, a healer she’d come to admire greatly. While technically they were the same class of Grisha, Lucrezia knew the healer was far more talented than she would ever be - saving lives instead of correcting wrinkles or the appearence of vain royals. But she didn’t mind, really, she was happy with her position and her life. “Oh, thank you! I will have to try it, although I have had far too much to eat already tonight, I don’t think I can manage another bite. Are you having a wonderful evening? You look so beautiful! I haven’t had much time to really look around, the Queen has been so concerned with her figure she’s asked me to stay close. But I am so glad to be here, and I am obsessed with my gown, I never get to wear this color.”
.
yuliya smiled widely when she recognized lucrezia. she was very fond of the tailors, and found a shame that they needed to spend their time in the grand castle, tending the queen and king’s wishes. maybe that’s why the king’s head was shining, after all --- he probably asked the tailors to tend it. such a shame, on the healer’s opinion. the tailors should be using their abilities to help other people, or just be free to be in the second army, if they wanted. they could help the soldiers’ self-esteem after an injury the healers could do nothing more for them. yuliya knew how scars could affect someone’s confidence.
she chuckled at the younger woman’s words, eating more of the small sweet. “ i feel you. but the food is delicious, and we just live once. ” yuliya’s tone was light, but her words had a deeper meaning that she hoped lucrezia wouldn’t catch. as much as yuliya was aware of how fragile life was from a young age, she hoped others didn’t need to experience that. “ i think so, yes. what about you, lu ? ” her time with sacha was more than great, and she shared some laughs with serafima, but the talk with her brother seemed to extinguish any good that happened. yuliya was sure that even daciana’s cruel words didn’t hurt as much as the acknowledgment of her brother’s hate towards her. “ oh, thank you. ” the healer replied shyly, a small smile on her lips. at the mention of the queen, she wrinkled her nose. “ i think the queen can stay a few minutes away from you. your gown is beautiful and i must say you look dashing tonight. it’s good to have a change of colours, but i couldn’t say no to red this time. ”
svnktyas·:
“of course not, i’ve had plenty of practice with faith to know what to put it in — or who should i say.” she accompanied the words with the shrug of her shoulders, willing the smile which had happily been plastered upon her lips since the beginning of their conversation to quieten slightly. maybe if it had been a different place or in fact a different time, where they could both act openly without drawing the attention of those around them even while donning masks, kajri would have wanted to ask ivan to dance. even if it would have been nothing more than shuffling awkwardly, both unfamiliar with the dances which seemed so popular around them. she imagined it would be like dancing with a family member, to laugh in joy rather than remain silent and focused on the right moves only. “our greatest job yet? you know you only have to ask.” mirroring his tone, she couldn’t help but wonder if he knew she was telling the truth. that beyond this playful exchange he could ask her to help him with jobs, with anything he needed help with. if kajri could work with ivan on everything she had to do the saints only knew everything would be easier, it would be nice trusting that someone had her back for once.
at ivan’s unexpected reaction her blush only deepened although if it was through embarrassment or shyness she couldn’t tell. “saints, what are you? you remind me of one of the kids in the company.” kajri laughed, jokingly pushing at the spy’s shoulder. she hadn’t meant to let slip anything about her history, even such a little reference like that. tonight she would be more open, she silently swore that after tonight she wouldn’t be so forthcoming — even with someone as trusted as ivan. “if it helps i’m surprised by it too, i didn’t think i would find someone special.. certainly not someone who would be here.” at ivan’s own confession she couldn’t help but turn to him with a look of glee, an expression which mocked her earlier comment towards him. “i do? you can’t say something like that without making me curious.” kajri asked, turning away from the man in front of her to inconspicuously glance around like she would somehow knew he was talking about. “i knew there was a reason we got on so well.” kajri smiled, grateful once more that ivan had been here.
“ i hope i’m one of them. ” he raised one of his eyebrows, but could see from where she was coming. hannes learned to trust his gut since he was a child --- and the only time it had failed him, he lost everything. faith couldn’t be so different from gut, he thought. his faith was centred on djel, but he also had something he thought it was faith on his friends. kajri was one of them. “ really ? ” the fjerdan spy asked surprised, but her words made a spark of sadness run through his body. kajri shouldn’t say things like that --- she didn’t know who he was, why he was there. he only told a lie for her, for all of his friends. but he couldn’t see a moment to tease her go away like that, like a bird flying away from its cage. “ even if i asked you to help me kill the king ? ” it was a teasing commentary, whispered with an intimacy shared by brother and sister, but hannes was telling the truth. if he was going to choose someone to help him to do that, it would be kajri. he trusted his fjerdan peers and knew they would him gladly, but the suli woman was different. he didn’t have the same trust level he had with kajri with his comrades --- just with a few exceptions, that he hoped would stay in fjerda for his own safety.
he laughed, mesmerized by the sound. hannes and ivan weren’t ones to laugh much, but the atmosphere it contributed to making him feel comfortable doing so. “ the company ? ” the fjerdan spy asked curiously. he always respected the fact that neither of them talked about their past, as it was easier that way. he didn’t need to lie to kajri as she never asked about it, and in return --- in a twisted way of showing gratitude --- he didn’t ask about hers. hannes couldn’t help and feel protective when hearing kajri talking about her special someone. was what he was going to feel if his sisters grew up to the age of marriage ? it was confusing, caring for someone that didn’t ever share blood with you. “ yes, neither me, if being honest. ” at least lidiya wasn’t a grisha, as far as he knew. it was already bad that she was ravkan, but hannes was lucky enough to not fall for a grisha. he already had some grisha friends that deserved rights, after all. a lover would be too much. “ of course you do. she’s blonde, and with a smile that can light up a room. ” hannes hoped he didn’t sound so dreamy as he thought he was. he could spend hours talking about lidiya’s smile and what it did to him. “ i said something about my special someone, it’s your turn now. ” he teased, but wouldn’t press it if kajri didn’t want to. “ maybe it was... ” djel, he wanted to say. “ saints who brought us together. ”
maskved·:
// ** 𝐚 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐫 @dvndelicns· ( 𝐲𝐮𝐥𝐢𝐲𝐚 )
一 * 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒛𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒐𝒇 𝒓𝒂𝒘 𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒏 only struck her after she’d finished her performance. her eyes silently examining her wrist, as if the broken bone didn’t belong to her and was just a shockingly gruesome painting that was meant to stir up some kind of emotion within her. with the passage of time sora had thought that it had dulled the pain of physical injuries, equating a snapped wrist or a tiny cut and shoving into the same register of certain emotions she was supposed to feel. back then, she’d never felt any physical pain ( or at least she just assumed she didn’t ). she’d always been the one who would mend wounds and tell others not to overreact before she’d attend her own. yet, it seemed like her stay at the little palace had made her weak 一 or maybe it’d just dissolved the illusion that she was ever okay to begin with. and, as much as she didn’t want to ask for help, the king still anticipated another performance after the break and if she didn’t fix this issue she wouldn’t get the money she so desperately needed.
“ uhm, excuse me, miss ? ” she approached a woman which elegance even a mask couldn’t cover up. “ someone told me to look for you in case of an injury.“ her gaze averted to the floor as a sudden sense of shyness crept up on her. for a split second she regretted not having bothered to pick up her mask after she accidentally ran into someone. “ i think i hurt my wrist a little. unfortunately i don’t have enough money to compensate you but if you’d just look at it i’d be very grateful. ”
.
yuliya tried to stay in the shadows after the clash with her brother. she wanted to leave, she truly wished, but she couldn’t. something in her told her to stay in the ballroom --- and even if sometimes yuliya’s gut was wrong ( most of the time, if being honest ) she decided to trust it. what she was going to do in her room ? cry ? dwell on her sadness ? scream ? curse her uncle and make plans to murder him ? it was better if she stayed there, in a place full of people. the healer could clear her head and against her better judgement, keep and eye on artyom if they needed. was it selfish of her ? to try to act as nothing happened, if she was eight, and he was four again ? act like their parents were still alive, and somewhere inside the ballroom ? it was what yuliya wished, at least. her life would be so much better if that excuse of a king didn’t engage the country in useless wars --- at least her parents could be still alive, and nothing of that would ever happen.
“ yes ? ” an unknown voice took yuliya by surprised, but the words of the girl in front of her only made her smile. the healer was more than happy to help, and doing what she was born to would clear yuliya’s mind, and distract her from her thoughts. “ i see the word has spread, at least. ” she smiled kindly at the other woman, wondering if she ever met her. she didn’t mind others telling to go look for her if one was injured. yuliya knew she was one of the kindest --- and more experienced, too, if she was going to believe others’ words --- and expected more people to look for her instead of one of her colleagues. but the healer felt a strange feeling --- yuliya felt like that wasn’t the first time they met each other, but she couldn’t recall any memory of that girl. she nodded alongside her explanation for her injury. bruised wrists weren't by far the worst bruise yuliya had ever healed, and she was relieved to know it was no serious injury. “ no, please, i wouldn’t accept any money, even if you offered to me. i’m a grisha, i can’t monetize small science. may i see it, your wrist ? ”
maskved·:
一 * 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒎𝒂𝒔𝒌𝒆𝒅 𝒄𝒐𝒕𝒕𝒂𝒈𝒆 𝒎𝒂𝒏 𝒃𝒂𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 in exorbitantly expensive cake enraptured her senses. a hidden smile now stretching across her face, bursting into sheer and loud laughter echoing across the marble walls. perhaps if she wasn’t so distracted with keeping herself from breaking out into joyous tears she’d have chosen a more suitable person she could blame for that pitiful sight of the man. yet, within seconds her finger was pointed at a fragile looking elderly man, barely caring if it made sense that he pushed them. to yeva it seemed like someone coming to a ball in that cottage attire would barely have the capacity to comprehend a situation as such. “ don’t be mad, cottage man. ” she said, the sickly sweet tone matching her earlier glee.
too bad she didn’t bring the liquor with her, presenting a full meal instead of solely letting him swim in cake. “ that poor fragile man’s senses are blinded by alcohol. ” she sighed before her eyes finally set on his face, taking a few moments before she recognized the visage she loathed so much. “ oh, ivan it’s you. i did not expect to see you here, who would’ve thought you would be the type to attend balls.” she continued, a string of words covering her sudden agitation, not realizing that it was odd she knew his name when she actually never exchanged any sentence with him before. was he here to lure lidiya ? perhaps even trying to impress her with his cottage attire so she’d go to his farm or wherever he was from. “ let me help you out of this mess. ” yeva stretched her hand out, being aware of the people who were witnessing the scene, yet already scheming to let him fall into the cake again.
.
he couldn’t believe it was the old man. hannes knew old people --- some of them weren’t strong enough to push into the cake, and that guy looked like he was drunk. or maybe that was what happened, just an accident caused by a drunk old man who couldn’t see two hands in front of himself without tripping. but that woman had something in her that made hannes uneasy. she was a grisha, he was sure of that. he didn’t felt such things near humans, after all. however, it was more than just that. the fjerdan spy couldn’t explain what he was feeling. all of his senses told him to get out of there, away from her --- maybe find val or kajri, because now he couldn’t face lidiya again like that, with his outfit ruined. it was a shame. that was his best pieces of clothing. “ i’m not a... cottage man. i’m a guard. ” hannes murmured confused, his brows furrowed.
was she making fun of him ? that didn’t make sense. he knew he was poorly dressed for the occasion --- but he was poor in ravka. the guard’s salary wasn’t much, and he didn’t see why he should save it. “ i can see it. ” but he couldn’t blame the old guy, if it was truly him who pushed him. hannes looked in surprise at the woman, wondering why and how she knew his name. he couldn’t recall meeting him, but he met a lot of people every day. the little palace was filled with evil drusjes, and hannes only knew a few by name. but it was strange --- almost no one knew who he was. “ funny, how you know my name and i don’t know yours. ” he was starting to get suspicious, and that wouldn’t end well. her words only increased it. “ i do like a good party from time to time. ” it was his only answer, looking cautiously at her. it was a lie of course --- hannes wanted nothing more than just be at his room, away from that people and from the king --- but he was used to it. her kindness seemed fake, unlike val’s or from that black haired healer. she reminded him of jedda, and that’s why he didn’t accept her hand, just smiling politely. “ if you do wish to help me, follow me to the nearest balcony, so you can help me get clean, somehow. ” was he doing too paranoid ? probably, but hannes knew he could trust in his gut.
sodaparticles·:
hearing her call them the nickname he had not heard in so long struck their heart in a way he could not describe. because what gave her the right? what gave her the right to call on him in such a way as if they were children again, when in reality he had not been a child in a very long time. as soon as their cousins died he was in the spotlight he’d craved for so long, but soon learned how much he despised it. and how much it hurt, every slap on the back of the head for doing something wrong, saying something wrong. when you are told you are a disappointment by the one man who was supposed to tell you the opposite for so long you begin to believe it.
what did uncle do to you? what didn’t he do? every time he heard someone raise their voice at him, artyom covered his ears. everything was a violent reminder of the awful man he grew up with, every little thing. artyom should be cruel, hardened by the abuse he’d grown up with, but he wasn’t. he was naïve, kind. kinder than he ought to be.
artyom looked away from his big sister, pain mixing with the anger he truly felt. he was glad they were wearing masks, otherwise he would have had to leave the event…. not that he was planning on staying after this encounter. “why else would i be here? i serve the king.” they spoke like a soldier, formal, hardened.
.
yuliya could endure her brother hating her. it hurt, but she knew it would be easy to change their mind. but nothing could’ve prepared her to hear that he served the king. artyom could serve anyone, but him. the man who, indirectly, was the responsible for their mother’s --- and by extension, their father’s --- death and of so many other soldiers and grishas. but, at the same it, it made sense. alexei batishchev used to be a close courtier of both the current king and the previous one, and it wouldn’t be a surprise if his son took his place. but artyom was no heir of that earldom. as far as yuliya knew, their uncle had heirs. her brother was free of that fate.
unconsciously, she grabbed artyom’s arm, concerned with his change of voice tone. what have happened in all those years ? that only made yuliya feel more guilty than she already felt. “ don’t say that, sobachka. ” she used the same tone she scolded reckless younglings who went to the infirmary with the same injury over and over again, but her voice was more pleading than angry. “ you can’t say that. he is the reason why mama and papa are dead, can’t you see ? ” the words left a bittersweet feeling on her mouth --- it had been ages since yuliya called her parents like that, but she and artyom only knew them like that.
she had come into terms with grishas who worship the ground the darkling walked on. yuliya could understand a little why they did that --- she learned why they felt like that, because of sacha --- but the king ? that was too much for her. that situation was too much for her. “ why do you need to serve the king ? doesn’t uncle have sons and daughters ? why you ? ” yuliya never tried to make contacted with her cousins. as much as they were her family, she knew it would lead to nothing, like all the letter she wrote to her brother. the healer could only hope that what she was thinking wasn’t true.
sodaparticles·:
aloysha grew more and more careless with each drink they downed, each thought about how they would regret this in the morning being thrown in the back of their mind with each swig. aloysha was definitely not the only one that deserved a night off, and he’d be damned if he wasn’t going to take the opportunity to be who wanted and do what he wanted.
when hannes approached them, they thoughts and feelings of regret for being so careless came back as they doubled over a trash can in the hallway of the palace, away from the party. at the sound of footsteps behind him and a familiar voice, alo tried to play off that he was okay, standing up straight and wiping his mouth, but to no avail. “yeah, i’m goo-” he couldn’t even finish his sentence before he threw himself back over the trash can and puked again. he put his hands on either side of it, gaining his balance and sighed. “yeah, i’m not good.”
.
that’s why his father never drank, and by extension, hannes. he had a few memories from the parties in fjerda --- everyone seemed to drink tons of whatever was the alcoholic drink his village made, but his father never drank more than a cup. ansgar naess used to say it was his druskelle antics, he needed to stay alert. hannes used to believe him, of course, he was a child. but now he knew. he knew.
puke wasn’t the worst thing hannes ever saw in his life. broken bones, burned flash, organs ripped apart --- hell, he even saw the dead bodies of his family when he was ten. what was puke compared to that ? but hannes didn’t know what to do. he normally didn’t stay enough in the druskelles’ festivities to know how to take care of a drunk person. “ at least you admit that. ” hannes sighed, trying to come up with something to help alo. they weren’t friends, but he felt the urge to help them. “ do you think your stomach can hold water ? did you eat something before drinking ? ”
theparadx·:
valentín laughed like he always did, as if he didn’t have a single care in the world. “and here i thought i was the only one who thought his majestic shinny bald head needed its own celebration date.” he was partly joking, truly it was insane how much his bald head managed to shine, he would be lying if he said he wasn’t a little impressed.
valentín knew what his friend meant. doing what they were doing at the little palace was dangerous, no one had tomorrow promised but they? they didn’t even have the evening guaranteed. at first valentín had only hoped to make his father proud and to finally make him see his son as someone who was worthy, that’s why was he had come to the little palace and he would’ve given everything he had to make that dream come true. however, the more time he spent around the people of the little palace, the more he began to question his wants and the more he began to put the people around him above his father, and right now? he thought that if he could give everything he had to ensure his friend got to live the life he knew he deserved, he would. “can we just pretend we’re other people tonight?” he asked suddenly. “just for tonight. let’s not worry about tomorrow. don’t we deserve at least that for today?“ he didn’t know about himself, but he knew his friend deserved that.
.
hannes managed to laugh softly. that was the effect valentín had on him --- mak his dark thoughts disappear like a magic trick. not that he would admit that. “ it should be a national holiday the day he decided to shave his head. ” he joked, with a fake patriotic smile on his face. hannes couldn’t care less for the ravkan king, and sometimes he wished he could be his barber, so he could chop off his head. “ do you think i could apply to be his barber ? or he has chronic baldness ? ”
wasn’t that what hannes did every day ? pretend to be someone he wasn’t ? even if ivan and him shared the same personality --- as much as being a spy allowed you to keep your true traits --- and some backstory events, they weren’t the same person. ivan didn’t had the same hatred hannes had for grishas or for the king, and ivan had some family members alive. he wasn’t haunted by the ghosts of the ones he couldn’t save --- mother, brother and sisters. ten-year-old ivan didn’t experience the same as ten-year-old hannes, and that’s why they’re different. hannes couldn’t mourn his family in ravka, nor he could express his religion. but valentín didn’t know none of that, and if that day came, hannes knew he would lose one of the few true things in his life as a ravkan. “ i think we do, yes. ” he agreed, a fond smile on his face. “ who would you be then, val ? ” hannes would be himself, at least.
sodaparticles·:
serafima knew that yuliya had her own familial problems, and in part that was what brought them closer, bonding over it. but sometimes a crashing wave of jealousy would flood into sera’s body when yuliya mentioned her parents, the fond memories she had of them while they lasted. sera never dared speak of the jealousy she felt, knowing it was unfair of her to feel that way. had they been a few years younger, sera wouldn’t have been as thoughtful, but she knew that in her core being she would always be someone who wanted more, more, more.
sera grinned at her best friend, careful to mask her mouth as she ate. “had anyone else thrown out the idea of a food fight, i would have chastised them,” sera admitted. “you know, some people think i have a soft spot for you.” she joked, even though literally everyone knew it. unfortunately, too; she had a reputation.
.
as much as yuliya was against a food fight --- many people could be fed with the amount of food in the ballroom, as she was sure it would have so many leftovers --- the idea of mess up the king’s fun in front of him was too good to be ignored. especially with the masks. no one would know who was the one who started it, and they could get away with any punishment. yuliya sighed gladly as she ate more delicacies --- her hunger was dying, but she couldn’t bear the thought of stopping eating.
“ it’s because you love me. ” yuliya teased, a smirk on her face. sometimes she fought she was a magnet for people who had a reputation for not showing emotions --- was it because she used hers on her sleeve ? “ and you do not ? ” it was a teasing question, but yuliya was genuinely curious to know if she was right. “ admit it, sera. you can’t say no to my puppy eyes. ”
sodaparticles·:
mischa leaned against a table near yuliya, nodding his head with a sigh while he stole a drink from another waiter and took a sip. “yeah, i think you’re right,” he agreed. “besides, i do enjoy having my head attached to my body. i don’t think it would go over well if i even attempted to speak for her.” mischa’s voice was full of nothing but fondness, even allowing a small smile to press on his lips at the thought of the ruthless, cunning woman he loved.
mischa’s smile disappeared as yuliya began to speak of her brother. part of him wished he could comfort her in knowing that he had four chaotic adopted siblings, and if they could make it work somehow, then yuliya and her brother could. he’d had a plethora of family problems, but he couldn’t bring himself to speak on it, because everytime he thought of even mentioning one of his brothers he felt physically sick and his limbs went numb. so he just nodded. “i assume it’s been awhile. that’s scary, though.”
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yuliya smiled smugly at mischa’s voice tone. she wasn’t oblivious --- at least when things concerned her --- and was aware that something has happening between the two of them, even if they would deny. it was cute, even if daciana’s words still echoed inside her head. would she say that to mischa, too ? or the problem was solely yuliya ? it was clear to anyone who knew them that mischa cared for the heartrender, in the same way yuliya did for sacha. but she giggled, nonetheless. “ well, as far as i know i don’t think sacha would chop my head off, but daciana ? but you’re totally right. ”
it had been scarier than the healer it would. or maybe she was too hopeful, hopeful that her brother wouldn’t be poisoned with their uncle’s hatred. but yuliya knew hope was a dangerous thing, and she had fallen for its sweets words again. artyom was more than poisoned --- they embraced their uncle’s morals as if he knew nothing more. yuliya hoped that, as a healer, she could heal her brother too. “ he is now a man. the last time i saw him, they’re four, almost five if i’m not mistaken. ” they’re strangers, now. artyom wasn’t the same boy yuliya had cradled in her arms, as she wasn’t that girl any more too. “ i never thought he would be so against seeing me as they’re now. it’s probably my fault, though. ” she should’ve tried harder, yuliya could see that as clear as the day now.
WHY YOU SHOULD BRING YULIYA AND ARTYOM’S ( @sodaparticles ) UNCLE TO @ravkahq
this is i, june, again !! you probably know me from my last powerpoint ( or not, because jayden is an angel ) but if you don’t, hi !! i made this to promote mine and jayden’s wc and also the fabolous group we’re in, ravkahq !! please, come join us.
uncle’s wanted connection post.